Red Robin
by MarinaNamaste
Summary: Jacob travels to Seattle to surprise his best friend Bella and runs in to her room mate. An over-achieving, athletic, beautiful girl named Renesmee. She is a dedicated and focused athletic scholarship student, with a troubled past. She has no time for boys. She doesn't date. But what will she do when she can't get Jacob out of her head? AU All human. No baby imprinting - Rated M
1. Chapter 1 Running Girl

**1. ****Running girl**

_I'm lost. I can't believe I've gotten myself lost! Great! _ He pulled over to the side of the road after 20 minutes of driving around the campus grounds. He'd retraced his route at least three or four times already. Jacob had just spent the past 4hrs driving to Seattle to visit Bella only to get lost inside the maze that is the University of Washington campus. This weekend was supposed to be a surprise for Bella. Well, that was the original plan. Now, it looked like he'd have to call her for directions.

_How humiliating... You douche! _ Jacob knew she'd be spending the weekend by herself. Ever since her boyfriend, Edward, had gone off to Berkley over a year ago to study, she had been free pretty much every weekend. Who better than BFF Jake to step-in and keep her company?

Jake and Bella's' fathers had been high school friends and one of his earliest memories was playing mud pies in his backyard with Bella.

Ever since he was old enough to have a crush on a girl, Jake had loved Bella Swan… and Bella had loved Jacob Black for exactly _zero_ of that time. Well sure, she loves him but more like a brother and brotherly things are far from the kind of thoughts Jacob has for her.

It was almost 5 o'clock and the sun was making its way towards the horizon on a chilly October afternoon. The colour of the sky was a beautiful cool orange. It cast a sepia light over the school, like an old photo. The whole place looked really nice. _Sepia? Why do you even know that word? _

Joggers were shuffling past his car, a few couples were cuddling or making out up near the Quad. Everyone seemed to know which way they were headed. Every one except him.

Jacob sucked up his pride and got out of the car hoping to get some directions. As he stepped up to the footpath he was very nearly bowled over by a girl jogging. No- she was running. The focus and speed she was traveling at was most definitely, running.

"Oh. Sorry." She panted. Her hand reaching up to cover her mouth.

"No harm, no foul." He smiled. Palms held outwards in a forgiving gesture.

"I was a million miles away. Well, about 3 miles actually." She looked down and pressed a button on her bulky sports watch. "And on track for a good time breakdown" she mumbled in approval to herself nodding. He interrupted her self congratulations "Um, can you help me find McCarthy? I'm totally lost".

She seamed to think for a moment. "Sure. You follow this road to gate 3. Then you take a right into Whitman. Follow it along for about 3 blocks then on the right you'll see it building N8. It's right down the end. There's generally parking out front or around behind." She smiled cheekily, "Clear as mud?"

He agreed, sniggering "Yep. I'm sure I'll find it. How hard can it be?" he countered, shrugging and made his way back to the driver's door. "Thanks for your help." She smiled, putting her earphones back in, "No worries" she called, taking off into her near sprint-jog again.

Jacob started the car and took off driving alongside his tour guide for a few beats, giving her a wave as he passed by. He travelled two more bocks past gate 3, right into Whitman and at the end of the road, he finally found building N8. Just as described. _Well that easy. You should have got directions half an hour ago. Stupid! Bella's probably gone out by now. _

_There's no dang parks anywhere. _He doubled back a few times. Stalking some guy all the way to his car and slotting into the perfect park right out front.

He entered the building and then came to an abrupt stop, just inside the entry foyer "Shit!" he exclaimed to himself. He shuffled out of the door way and leaned over to the inside wall, silently pressing his forehead in to the bricks. As he spun around to make his way back out of the building, laughing at his own stupidity, he slammed straight into a student entering quickly though the doorway.

"Ouch" she squealed as she rebounded off his chest landing flat on her backside. Looking up from her awkward position she started laughing. "Lost boy! Looks like you found the place. What's the rush?" she asked as she rubbed the graze on her hand.

"Sorry. Oh God, I'm so sorry!" Jake apologized reaching out an arm to help her up. She reached her long toned arm up and he helped pull her to standing. "YOUR directions were great. I'M just an idiot who doesn't know my friends dorm number" Jacob sighed and put his face into his hands, is shoulders sinking. She reached a friendly arm up to his. Her hand was warm and electrifying as she brushed against his skin.

"What's your friend's name? I might know him?" she offered

"Ah. He, is a she." He corrected warily. "Her name's Bella. Bella Swan? She's a sophomore but she only just moved to the on-campus dorms this term."

She paused, looking intently into his eyes, recognition flashed in her emerald eyes. "You must be Jacob." She grimaced, looking towards the stairs.

She indicated to herself, "I'm Renesmee, Bella's roommate." Her head cocked to the side, apparently thinking something over. Her lips scrunched to the side and she bit into her thumb nail.

"What?" he asked, puzzled by her hesitation. She took a long breath in through her nose, she her lips tucked into her mouth. "Bella doesn't know you're coming does she?"

"I thought I'd surprise her. I know she'll be on her own this weekend" A worrying thought popped into his mind. "You are in the middle of semester right?" O_h shit, don't tell me I drove all the way here and she's back in Forks or something?_

"Yeah we are." She replied, he thought he heard a hint of irritation in her voice. "But, Edward flew in for a visit this week anyway. He leaves tomorrow morning, so…" _fill in the blanks big fella! _

Jacob looked at her, his brows raised, eyes questioning, his head shaking slightly side to side. Pity clouded her eyes._ Poor guy, has no idea._ "So… they're kind of having a 'private' farewell party." she hesitated, two fingers motioning in the air qualifying the word 'private'.

"Oh" he said, still not understanding. "Ohhhh man" he moaned as comprehension washed over him, his eyes lowered, colour shading the cheeks of his russet skin. "I'm an idiot, aren't I?" he questioned, looking up at Renesme through his long dark lashes.

Giving him a kind tap on the elbow, "You had good intensions. Maybe you just should have phoned first or something though." She placated. "Let's go up and see if their…free." She turned her cheeks reddening slightly and she practically sprinted up the stairs. As she stopped outside in the hall she gestured to the door. "We're in room 203 for future reference."

Jacob looked at the door. A gold and purple striped scarf hung from the handle. _You truly are a chump Jacob._ "Does that mean what I think in means?" as if to answer him, a soft carnal moan drifted out from the dorm. "Don't answer that" he whispered. His arms hung by his side, he just stood there, fixed, is eyes locked on to the telling scarf.

Taking pity on him, she quickly linked her arms through his and turned him back to the stairs. "You look kind of fit? Do you do much cardio?" she questioned, not waiting for an answer. "Let's go over to Husky stadium. I haven't run stairs for a while and you look like you could burn off some steam." She got no agreement or argument as she dragged him down the stairs and away from the sounds drifting from her door room.


	2. Chapter 2 An Acquaintance

The stadium lights weren't on yet as they entered the grandstand. The light was still filtering through, casting a striped pattern onto the seats. He followed her to the base of the main stand and stopped at the bottom. His eyes scanned up the dizzying heights of steps that scaled to the top. "Let's do, say… Five single step reps and then three double steps"

Shaking himself out of his private torture he sighed, "I think I'm just gunner drive home. Three is a crowd."

"Don't be stupid Jacob. You just spent, what? Three hours driving here?"

"Closer to four, La Push is further west than Forks" he clarified darkly.

"Well, either way. You're not driving through the night running away from _that_." She countered, pointing back towards the dorm buildings. "Here" she ordered, handing him a simple hair tie that had been around her wrist, you might need this. "Come on, it'll do you good." She huffed, as she stood behind him nudging him up the first stair. He pulled his long hair back into a low ponytail at the nape of his neck, his feet felt like lead as he started in to a light jog up the stadium stairs.

"Do you do any sports?" She enquired coming to run next to him, their steps in sync with one another.

"I used to do a bit of Karate actually." He grinned in spite his funk. "I've been going to a Dojo in Forks since I was five. I've even went to some regional and state comps. But I haven't done it much these last few years. I guess high school got in the way. It got too expensive for dad anyway." A sad longing rolled out from within him as he spoke of his craft, he's eyes betraying how much he missed it. "And now, now I don't know what I want to do." he added quietly. "But all that training stays with you." He puffed his chest out, lifting his chin and pretend to dust off his shoulder. "I've still got a little some, some."

She smiled over to him, happy to have distracted him for at least a few minutes. "Well, pick up the pace lost boy. Shouldn't you be used to doing these with water buckets and a yoke?" she giggled as she increased the pace.

Jacob kept up the stride instantly. "What are you training for anyway" he asked as they reached the top. Turning around to decent the steps she answered "Track. Hurdles specifically. I do sprints and long jump too but the hurdles are my particular form of torment. It keeps me pretty busy."

"Wow. Do you have a major?"

"Nursing. I really like science and medicine and helping people," She shrugged. "And it's a great job to travel with too. Not that I don't love Clallam County."

"You're from Washington?"

"Sequim born and bred. Well sort of… I went to Sequim High."

"You know for Twenty, you seem really dedicate and focused." He puffed as he moderated his speed on the decent, trying to avoid tripping and breaking his neck, or tripping and making an even bigger ass of himself.

"I know what I want and I refuse to let my life pass me by merely as an observer. I want to write my own story, you know? I don't want my childhood to define my future. Start my own story." She elucidated with a melancholy expression on her face. "And I'm not Twenty, I'm a sophomore but I got my GED and got early acceptance here. I'm still nineteen."

"Ha. We're the same age!" he nudged her as they reached the bottom, turning to ascend again.

Taking off his t-shirt so it wouldn't get sweaty he asked, "What do your parents think about you being away from home?" His long black hair flowed into the contours of his muscled back. She eyed his sculpted abbs and broad shoulders, a slight flush rising to her cheeks as she appreciated his manliness. Her attention momentarily diverted, she flicked back to his question

"Ah. That's kind of a loaded question. Let's just say that the people who matter to me the most are supporting me 100%" she answered cryptically.

She took off on front of him ending the conversation and any further questions he might have had. _ Man, what a great ass. Oh god dipshit, cool it. _

They made their way to the top. Again. Turned to go back down. Again. "Well, it's not like you have to worry about a job for at least two more year's right?"

"Right! And it's almost three more years. Lucky me!" she giggled as she plodded her way down. "Actually" she said looking at her watch. "We might have to call this training session short. I have the auditorium booked for 6:30. I only get it for half an hour and I'm dying to get out of these clothes. You want to come with?"

Jacob felt his breath catch as she mentioned getting out of her clothes for half an hour. She noticed the colour in his cheeks. "Relax Jacob, I meant changing out of these sweats before we go to the hall. No scarfs on the door! Get your mind out of the gutter" she laughed before setting of into a trot back to the residence.

As they approached room 203 they stopped to listen for any suggestive noise. All was silent. Said scarf was still on the handle. She turned to look at Jacob. "I really need to get my stuff out of there." She moaned. "I'm going in." Renesmee hammered her fist on the door. "Bella!" she hollered. "Times up. I need to get my stuff." She turned to Jacob and winked, a wide grin across her pretty face. "We're coming in ready or not!"

Jacobs' eyes popped, his head shaking like a cartoon character. "I'm not going in there!" he squeaked. "Don't tell her I'm here." He hissed as she opened the door and scurried in. "I'm keeping my eyes closed" she murmured.

Jacob could hear muffled laughs through the door, the sound of draws opening and closing, papers being shuffled, a bang and a yelp, followed by an expletive. Then she emerged from the room, clutching some books and papers in one arm and a bundle of clothes in the other dragging what looked like white coffin with stickers all over it out the door.

"Here, hold these." She commanded as she thrust the papers and book in to his arms. She leaned the casket like thing against the wall and gathered the clothes into both arms and marched down the hall. Jacob in tow. "I'll just be 5 minutes." She called as she disappeared into the female bathrooms.


	3. Chapter 3 The Lonely Child

**I thought I'd better add a disclaimer... Stephanie Myer owns Twilight and all the characters. I'm just borrowing them to mix it up a little.**

**There is a bit where Renesmee is playing her own composition, it doesn't exist, it is a figment of my imagination. having said that, what I imagine it might sound like is similar to a Piece transposed by D Cullen (how cool is that coincidence!) called 'Sakura'. A cellist named Tina Guo does a great version of it. Google it's on YouTube and have a listen if you're interested. **

**Peace out!**

* * *

Jake slid down the wall, landing with a thud as his back side hit the flood. _What an ass up. What are you gunna do now hey Black? Follow Bella's gym junkie roommate around campus all evening then sleep in the car?_ He rubbed his hands in his face and let out a long sigh.

He looked over to the big white box leaning against the wall. _ What the hell is that? Some kind of exercise torture device? _ He looked down to the papers in his hand. The pages were filled with rows and rows of music. It looked like a foreign language to Jacob. Dots and circles, lines and squiggles flowing and arching up and down the page. The book was a music book. He opened it and saw the hand written notes across the page. Numbers above the lines. Hashes and dots everywhere. He flipped through the book. Stopping at a page that was tilted 'The lonely Child' at the top. By Renesmee Mason written in a beautiful feminine script. Then he saw 'cello' written on the top corner. "Cello." he said out loud to himself, pleased that little mystery was solved. _God, how many things does this chick do? Talk about fingers in every pie. Mmmm pie. I wonder if she stops long enough to eat, she's probably vegetarian or something. I can't do tofu. _

Renesmee reappeared before long, dressed in Jeans and a pale blue button down linen shirt. Ballet flats in hand. "I feel human again" she smiled. "Let me just chuck my clothes in the doorway and we'll go"

They set off across the street and back towards Meany Hall. Jacob carrying the papers and Renesme, her instrument.

They entered the great auditorium, the sound of the door clicking open and their footsteps on the parquetry floor echoed through the arena. They climbed up onto the stage. Jacob had never been on a stage before and was taken aback as to how large everything looked. It was quite daunting.

Renesmee dragged a chair and a music stand into the middle of the stage. Then she lugged the instrument over and placed it on the floor. Kneeling over it, she opened the latches and opened the lid. She pulled out the cello and laid it on its side. She fiddled with the bow and wiped some amber block over it. Then she paused. She looked at Jacob as if suddenly remembering he was there. She left the stage and returned dragging a second chair. Gesturing for him the sit. He did.

She silently took the papers from his hands, sifted through the book and opened it up. Placing it on the stand. She picked up a tuning fork and tapped it on her leg. She closed her eyes as she held it to her hear. Jacob was suddenly aware he was sharing a very private moment for this young women. He shifted in his seat but stayed, transfixed, his eyes never leaving her face. She opened her eyes and smiled at him as she bent to pick up the instrument with reverence. She sat, opened her legs apart and placed the instrument between her knees. Jacob swallowed hard as his eyes darted to her opening legs, feeling the provocativeness of the gesture.

She tucked astray hair behind her ear and lifted the tuning fork again. This time placing it in the wood of the cello. As she plucked the string for the first time the note echoed through the hall. She continued to pluck the strings, fiddling with the pegs and twisting the delicate mechanisms. Then she lowered the fork and reached down for the bow. Her shirt absently falling forward revealing the soft undulating skin of her cleavage. He could help but look. He was only Human. She straightened, placed her bow on the strings continued to tune the instrument. She closed her eyes once again as she created the up and down of the scales. The simple music filing the hall. She opened her eyes, her green orbs piercing his soul. "Let me play for you." she whispered.

Her gaze honed in on the pages in front of her and she began to play._ For me_.

The melody was haunting, fresh and young one minute then fouled and painful the next. He didn't know the title of the piece but he had a pretty good idea. She continued playing as the piece grew louder and faster, then suddenly she played the climaxing note. It lasted several beats, the sound echoed in the air for what seemed like minutes. His gaze locked on hers. Mesmerised by the music. Startled by the effect it had had on him. She looked expectedly at him. "How was that?" she asked. _Wow_

"How was that…? How was that!? Renesme, that was the single most amazing thing I have ever heard or seen in my entire life. Did you write that?" she nodded her assent. "I couldn't look away." He exclaimed. He really hadn't seen any thing like that before. Granted, he'd never actually seen anyone play a classical instrument in the flesh. but blind Freddy could see was talented, but more so, she had a depth to her that made her seem older than her eighteen years. "You're really talented." he complement, meaning it.

"No, no I'm not." Her eyes darted down to the floor, her cheeks flushing an appealing pink. "I just… I just really connect with that particular piece. It's special to me" she muttered, embarrassed by the praise. "I wrote it about a really hard time in my life." She smiled as she sucked in a breath. "It was good therapy" she smiled, forcing herself to square her athletic shoulders and smiled a perfect smile at Jacob, the bubbly girl he had met today returned leaving the haunted reverent woman gone. It was eerie how she could plaster such a believable smile so easily. Jake though he could see through her though _That girl is hiding something._

With the quiet spell broken, she stood, packing up her music and the instrument. As she clicked the last latch and stood the case on its end, she checked her watch, her brows raised in panic. "Oh God! Let's get out of here before the chamber orchestra arrives."

"Are they that bad?" he joked

"I just want to avoid someone." She frowned as several people entered the auditorium, most were carrying cases. One long haired Latino boy carrying a large black case similar to Renesme's veered off into their path.

"Are you finally joining us Renesmee?" he asked in his strong Spanish accent. "I can take you through some of the music if you like." Renesmee wrapped her arm around Jacob, taking him by surprise, she leaned into him and quickly whispered. "Please hold me, just for a minute. Act like by boyfriend." He complied, wrapping his arm safely around her, resting his hand on her hip. She smiled nervously at the boy. "No, Nahuel. Regular orchestra is enough for me. I'm flat out keeping practice up for one, let alone two. You music majors will just have to make do with however many cellist you have, sorry."

He nodded his understanding, his eyes gliding over her body, taking in the way Jacobs's hands rested on her. He gave Jacob a look of malice that made him unconsciously hold Renesmee tighter. Renesmee turned back to the door nudging Jake along as they hurried out to the street. She waited for the large doors to bang close before she stepped away from Jake, breaking his grasp on her. "Thanks for that." she said, her voice unsteady, obviously rattled. "Ex?" he prompted. "Ah, No. More like 'can't take a hint' crush." She explained, still lost in her own thoughts. "I don't have any ex's… I don't date." She stated.

Jake's face lifted in intrigue. _What the hell does that mean? Who doesn't date?_ "What? Are you married or something?" Jake laughed.

"No!" she huffed. "Nahuel can't seem to get the message though. Hopefully he thinks I'm taken now and will back off. It's just that," she paused thinking of how best to explain. "I'm here on a scholarship and I barely have enough to time for study and athletics, I squeeze in my music when I can, not forgetting my alone 'sanity time' and of course work and friends. Boyfriends can just wait." She said.

"Wow, you're a busy girl!" _and missing out on the best part of college._

"Yeah, well, if you want something bad enough you have to make it happen yourself. No one's gunna hand it to you." She sighed. A glimpse of defeat washed across her features. It was gone as quickly as it came. "You hungry? I'm starving" she confessed, a half veiled attempt to change the subject.

"I'm always hungry" he stated. Glad the mood had lifted.

"I think Jacob, that is something that we defiantly have in common." She grinned, as they made their way to a little pizza shop on campus.

The pair walked side by side, her cello towed behind them. They shared a giant pizza; chatting and sharing small tid-bits about themself. Jacob spoke of the heart break of losing his mother and then the effort it took to care for his wheelchair bound father. Both the restrains and the freedom that life on a Reservation could have. His feeling of being lost in regards to what he wanted out of life now that school was over. College never really being an affordable option for him. He remained home with his father, earning a little pocket cash by fixing neighbour and friends cars.

Renesmee spoke of how her Grand-Mère Sophie taught her how to play the Cello. The old woman had played in Orchestras around the world before she met Renesme's Grandfather, married and came to live in the USA after the war. How she had taught Renesmee to speak French. They shared funny stories about Bella.

She shared nothing of her early childhood.

He sensed her holding back and knew better than to ask.

As the night drew on, Jacob mentioned his poorly thought out journey and how uncomfortable it would be sleeping in the Rabbit.

"You're not sleeping in a car like a hobo Jacob! You can stay with us." She grinned, brows pulled in exasperation. _As if I'd let him sleep in his car!_

"Are you sure? I don't want to get you in trouble or anything?"

"It's no problem, honest. It's not like Edward isn't there every few weekends anyway." She blurted out, regretting it instantly.

"Oh… Yeah." he nodded, defeat in his eyes, his face, his whole saw the crumpled slump in his shoulders, his whole posture that of a defeated man. _God Bella, do you have any idea how beautiful this boy is? Inside and out…That face…He is gorgeous…Ness you don't have time, remember! Yep. Red Robin, we are never gunna be that._

"Come on." She breathed, pulling on his arm. "It's past my bed time and you need your beauty sleep!"

As they approached the dorm room it was late, and quiet was across the halls. She bit her lip looking up contritely at Jacob's 6"4' stature. "We only have a small couch; I don't know how well you'll fit."

He shrugged, "Anything's better than the Rabbit." Entering the room it was dark, Renesme flicked on the bed side lamp, illuminating her side of the room. Jacob could see the other bed in the room. Bella's bed. Her dark hair fanned across the pillow, bare shoulders peaking above the covers, Edwards's naked chest pressed up behind her, his arm around her waist. He pained, looking away. _ Fuck. What am I doing here? This really is low point Jake. I should have just driven home as soon as I got here. _His eyes drifted across the room, landing on the smallest sofa he had ever seen. _Worst freekn' night ever. Well, the company was alright. But I'm gunna be sore in the morning. _Renesme came over with a pillow and a thin throw rug.

"Here," she whispered. "Sorry it's so small."

"It'll be fine" he said, taking his shoes and shirt of, settling in to the makeshift bed.

_Don't look, don't look, don't look. _She turned and switched off the light. Using the cover of darkness she quickly changes into her PJ's. Sliding in to the warmth of her bed she mummed softly "Night Jacob."

"Night"


	4. Chapter 4 Awakenings

In the darkness, Ness could hear the soft breathing of Bella and Edward and Jacobs deeper huffs coming from the tiny sofa. The sounds of the springs creaking as he turned in a vain attempt to get comfortable. After almost 20 min of listening to him toss and turn she rose from her bed and padded over to him. Whispering in the darkness, she said. "Jacob. Do you want to swap? You sound so uncomfortable."

"No, it's ok. You wouldn't fit much better anyway." He replied.

"Well… why don't you sleep with me then?"

"Um…?" W_hat the fuck? She wants to sleep with me? _

Hearing his misunderstanding, she hurried to clarify. "I mean like, head to toe or something"

"Oh! Oh. Ok? Are you sure?"

"Yeah, it'll be like a slumber party!" she giggled, mockingly.

"No pillow fights?"

"Only if you kick me!"

"I hope your feet don't smell." he teased.

"Ditto!" Her smile trickled into her voice in the darkness as she slipped back onto her pillow. He climbed into her bed lying up-side-down, both shuffling to find an agreeable spot. "This is weird." She whispered.

"Ssssh, don't think about it. I need my beauty sleep remember." He countered. Closing his eyes he felt the comfort of the mattress and allowed himself to relax. She listened to the rhythm of his slumbered breathing as she lulled herself into sleep.

oOoOoOo

Renesmee woke to the quiet sounds of the morning. Looking at the poster on her wall from the wrong angle, she was disorientated. Her awareness focused to the heavy weight across her ribs. She felt the warm breath on her neck, a strong broad bare chest behind her, her pillow the hard bicep of a man. _Shit! How did I get here! Shit! Shit! Shit! God he is built… Don't go there Red Robin, don't go there! _She gently attempted to lift his arm off her. He stirred in his sleep pulling her closer in. _Shit! _

She heard the dorm room open as Bella returned, Renesmee guest she was back from seeing Edward off. There was a quick gasp as Bella caught sight of them embraced in bed. "Renesme? Jacob!" Bella squawked, disbelief oozing from her. _Oh Shit!_ In a blur, he bolted upright rolling out of bed, pulling Renesmee out of bed with him. He rolled on to the floor landing on his back with a thump; she followed; hair, blanket, arms and legs all a tangled mess.

She landed on top of him face to face, the wind knocked out of her. "Bella!" he yelled. His voice an 'I've just been sprung' falsetto.

"Hi Jake." Her tone questioning. Looking at the girl on top of him, Jake pushed Renesmee off and jumped to standing. He rushed over to the couch, scrambling to pull his shirt on. "I didn't think you were coming till later today? When did you get in? Why are you sleeping with my roommate?" Bella demanded.

"Um, I didn't sleep with her. Well, I slept with her but with clothes on and head to toe."

"That didn't look head to toe and there's not many clothes on either." she accused, looking between Jacob and Renesme.

Resentment rose in Renesmee. _What's to you anyway Bella? You were busy. I talked and had dinner with your 'Friend'. (if that's all he is.)_

"Ahh" He hesitated, reaching his strong arm up to rub the back of his neck. "I wanted to surprise you, so, I came up early. But you were… you were… busy." Stammered Jake nervously.

Understanding flashed across Bella's face. Her tell-tale blush scarlet on her skin. "Oh." She gasped, her hands reaching to cover her mouth. Jacob reddened underneath his tanned skin.

Still bristling, Renesmee attempted to calm herself. _Poor Jacob. _"You had the scarf on the door. I took Jacob along for a little tour. That's all. I showed him the auditorium. We had pizza."_ God that sounds like a date! _ Bella's eyes narrowed at Renesme._ "_I even made him run stairs!" She added hoping to ease the mood.

"Yeah, she's a real fucking task master" added Jake. _With a sexy ass…Shit! God, that sounds like we went on a date! What? No, you came all this way for Bella, you dick. Stop thinking with it! Fuck! You came all this way to visit Bella thinking with it anyway. Shit! _"I gotta go wiz" he muttered, almost running out of the room. Both women's eyes followed him as he scurried out the door.

"So you've met my Jacob." said Bella more as an accusation than a statement.

My _Jacob? They do have a history?! Bella always said he was just a friend to her. He wanted more, but she loved Edward too much. Maybe she gets a little bit on the side anyway? Maybe friends with benefits?_

"He seems really nice Bella. Relaxed. Self-assured. Honest." _ A hot native Adonis! Jesus, real it in red robin._

"I call him my own personal sun." Bella smiled.

"Yeah. I get that." She agreed, her eyes gazing around there room, stopping at the clock on the wall,

_Eight forty _"Shit! It's twenty to nine!" She shrieked, racing to dress. She stripped off her PJ's. With her back to Bella she fumbled to get on a bra and then the jeans she wore last night. "Crap, crap, crap. I'm never gunna get there on time."

_Holly mother of all that is sexy! _Jake came back into the room, his eyes bugging out as she saw Renesme bending over in nothing but a bra and simple white underpants, trying to slip into some dark skinny jeans. _Fuck me, those legs! _ She jumped up and down her generous breasts bouncing in her cotton white bra. Her long auburn hair falling in ringlets over her shoulders, nestling into her tight waist. _That is one sexy woman._ With their backs still to the door neither girl realised Jake had returned.

Bella started to giggle at Rensmee's antics. "Relax Ren. I'll drive you."

"Oh, can you?" She asked. Gratitude radiating out of the question. She looked up to Bella and then she also saw Jacob standing in the doorway. His eyes were wider that the Grand Canyon, a silly little grin plastered across his face. "Ahhh!" Renesmee squealed, dashing behind the wardrobe door. "God Jacob! Did you have to just stand there and look?"

"Um… Sorry Renesmee. I only saw a bit. I mean…I didn't see anything bad. I mean… It's not like its bad to look at. I mean…I wasn't looking for very long." _Shit! She must think I'm such a perv. You are Black. Always thinking with your dick. _He paused, at a loss for what to say. _"_Sorry."

"Just turn around, ok." She implored. He turned and Bella came to stand by him. She looked at him with probing eyes. He shrugged at her and mouthed _sorry_ with a pleading look.

He searched into her chocolate eyes, into the soul of his best friend. The girl that he was madly in love with… or was he? He felt the familiar knot in his chest. He reached out and grabbed hold of her hand. He knew she only felt friendship for him but it felt satisfying to hold her petite little hand in his. _A guy can dream_. But _maybe I need to vary my dreams up a little though. Add a little auburn headed goddess into the mix._

Attempting to correct way the morning had transpired, he grinned at Bella. "Let's start this day again shall we?" With a jest of false formality he droned, "Good morning, Miss Swann"

She matched his fun, mimicking a bad British accent, "Good day to you, Mr Black, you're here early."

"Well yes, in my haste to see you, I failed to confirm you availability last night. The lovely Miss Renesmee was an amicable host, she provided me with entertainment, nourishment and shelter. So, what is on the itinerary for today Miss Swann?" He bowed in an exaggerated arc.

Renesmee scrambled to find a clean t-shirt, swinging it on in record speed. Lying on the floor looking under her bed she wildly reached for her shoes. _God! What a start to the day! How embarrassing! Jumping up and down half undressed. How the hell did I end up spooning Jacob?_ _Focus... Socks on. Shoes on. Bag. Hair. Oh shit look at my hair. Messy bun. Done. Look at those two dumbasses. There's got to be something more going on there._

Jacob was tossing around ideas for their plans for the day. "We can hang out here or catch a movie." answered Bella.

Renesmee quickly piped in, "Can you take me to my lesson first? It's only a few blocks from the theatre. Can you fit my bike in the tray too?"

"Yeah sure. We'll just have to squish the three of us in the front." They piled into Bella's Chevy truck, Bella at the wheel.

Jacob opened the other door and waved Renesmee into the centre. Jake clambered in next to Renesmee and off they went.


	5. Chapter 5 Voltage

The journey lasted about 6 minutes but it felt like a life time for Jacob. He was acutely aware of Renesmee's thigh pushed against his. Their arms pressed parallel to one another. She felt it too, like a current of electricity was running through their body arching across the points of contact. It was making it hard to concentrate. Desperate to break the silence, he started to make small talk. "So, what's the lesson on today Miss Over-achiever?" he half turned to her in the confines of the cabin.

"Um, Cello. I teach a few elementary students on the weekends I'm free and after school. You know, as a tutor."

Bella chimed in, excited to show her friend off. "She's so good. You should hear her play Jake. And she's fast, I mean, really fast when she hurdles and she does that funny running thing the air thing at long jump too. I mean she's really good at track and field."

Renesmee looked down to her lap, her cheeks flaming. "OK Bella, he gets the picture. No need for the cheer squad."

"That would be good to see. Do you have a cheer squad? I'd join it." He rumbled, desire dripping into his request. He turned to look at both the girls. Bella was beaming with pride at her friend accomplishments, completely unaware of the electric tension surrounding the other two. Renesmee's eyes bore into his, challenging him to move closer and cautioning him not to, both at the same time.

They both turned to face the front, their eyes fixated on the road. Jacob shifted his hand, only an inch. His little finger gliding over hers. They both felt the heat from one another.

_What are you doing Black? Are you really doing this here? In front of Bella? I love Bella, but she's never gunna love me the way I want her to. Maybe I should give this a go? What can it hurt? Who are you kidding? It could hurt a lot. And not just me. Shit. My heart is racing. Maybe if I just touched her a little. Renesmee. It's such an exotic name. Fuck she's so hot. Does she want me to touch her? Or is she telling me to fuck off. I can't fucking tell! Only one way to find out? God, don't mess this up Jake. I think I want to know this girl. I mean, really know her inside. What would she feel like inside? Shit! Down boy. Man, I want to know her secrets. I want her to want to tell me. I want her to let me in. Yeah you want IN! Jacob this could be the mother of you children. Be respectful. Shit did I just think that? I have to find out if she likes me. I have to try at least. Right…I'm doing it._

He coiled his pinkie around hers.

Renesmee's heart raced, her breath hitched in her chest. Without a second thought she coiled her finger back around his. Feeling the roughness of his skin. _Oh God! Is he making a move right here? In font of Bella! _She turned to watch her roommate. She was happily humming along to the radio, attentive to the road. Oblivious to the finger-play going on next to her. A small smile spread across Renesmee's face. _He's holding my hand! Well sort of. This beautiful man-boy is touching me. On purpose! Does he want to be my boyfriend? Maybe we could go see a movie? I'd let him touch more than my little finger! He'd be a good boyfriend too. Flowers. Kisses. Secrets now one else knows. Could I tell him? Yeah. I could. I really could. I want to tell him. I want him to know me. The real me. I want him. _

Jacob's eyes drifted to their entwined fingers. _God, her skin is so soft. I wonder how long her lesson is. I could take her to a movie after. Well, the three of us could go. I'll make sure I sit next to her. I could hold her hand. I've got to get her alone._ His eyes shifted up her long arm. Across her heaving chest. Her breathing sped up. _Look at those tits. I wonder if she'd let me touch them. I bet their soft. God I want to kiss her already. Shit ! calm down. _

Renesmee leaned her shoulder onto him. Her head angling to his. She lifted her gaze to him. They stared in to each other's eyes. That spark still surging. Their stare, burning and intense. His gaze drifted across her features. Her green emerald eyes, her soft pink lips, the flush of her cheeks. Her glossy auburn hair bundled on top of her head. Her skin was clear and bright with a fine sprinkling of freckles across her nose. _She is so beautiful. I have to know this woman. In every way. _

Renesmee saw the desire burning in his eyes. She panicked. _Shit! I can't do this! Dates! Movies! With what time little birdie? How does this get you up and out? Not gunna be her REMEMBER!_

He saw how her eyes changed form burning to hesitation to distant all in a few seconds. Her eyes turned glassy, tears welling as she mouthed to him '_I can't.'_ her head shaking _no_ with rejection. She moved her body away from his, an infinitesimal gap between them. It felt like miles. She uncoiled her finger from his and she placed her hands carefully in her lap.

"Is it this house or the one with the hedge?" asked Bella. Breaking them out of their private exchange.

Renesmee gulped in a breath looking around, the outside world had been forgotten. She'd lost her bearings. "Um, the one with hedge." she replied. Pulling up, she turned to un-do her seatbelt. Jacob placed his hands on hers. "I'll do it." He whispered. The warmth of his hand scorched her skin as he reached between then unclipping both their belts. He opened his door. Reaching back into the cabin he took hold of her hand again and helped her out. He looked into her eyes. Searching for a glimpse of what she wanted. She wasn't sure herself. He squeezed her hand silently communicating_ I know you felt it. I know you feel it. This_._ Try. Trust me._

"How long is your lesson? Maybe we could wait and catch the movie with you?"

"Um. An hour. But, I have an assignment to get done, then training, so I can't." she lied. "It's fine, you two have some BFF time OK!" the perfect smile he saw through pasted across her face, she leant back into the cabin. "Thanks for the lift Bella."

"No worries!" she called "Are you sure you don't want to see a movie with us? We can wait."

_Yes. Yes. Yes. I want to. Wait for me. I want to share a soda straw with him. I want the share everything with him… But I can't. I just can't. _

Renesmee knew she wanted to date, one day. After college. When she has a successful career, a good home, money to spare. Then she could find a nice man who adored her and they could live happily ever after_. Not now though Red robin. Not now. _Jacob was about three years too early_. I'm sorry._

She answered Bella, "Yeah, I'm sure. I'm too busy for movies. You know how it is." She smiled. She tried, but the smile never reached her eyes. He saw the effort.

She looked up at him. The sorrow and pleading in her eyes almost broke him. "I'm sorry Jacob." she whispered. Her sweet face warping into the pain she always held inside. _Why is this so hard? Cause you like him Red Robin. And you can't. Just go to the dam lesson. Say good bye and walk away. _

"Bye" she called to Bella.

"Bye. See you at dinner?" Bella called, leaning across the seats as she lifted her phone checking her messages..

"Yeah. OK. Your turn to cook." Ren confirmed. Her green eyes flicked to Jacobs. "Bye" she whispered to him turning, almost running into the safety of the house with the hedge.

_Don't let her go Jacob. Don't let her run. Shit! What can I do? I'll just tell Bella. She'll help. What are you going to say, 'Hey Bells, so… I know you'll never love me so I want to do your room mate instead, can you help me hook up?!' Yeah that'll go down like a pile of shit. _He turned back to the truck and found his chance_._

_Fly Red Robin, fly. Be cool. Don't run. _She could feel him staring at her. She could practically see the unbelieving and shattered look on his face as she fled._ Keep going. 10 more feet. Just get to the porch, ring the bell. Teach the dam lesson, then ride home. Shit! My bike. Shit!_

She could hear the tray already opening as she turned around. Jacob was lifting her mountain bike off. He started wheeling it towards her. "You forgot something" he called as he approached.

"Thanks, it would have been a long walk home without it."

"I would have just waited for you." _I think I'll wait for you any way._

_"_You don't need to wait for me Jacob." She warned. "Go and have fun. I can find my own way. I've been on my own for a while. I can look after myself." Her tone sharper than she had intended.

"I'm sure you can" he replied "I just thought we could hang out. I'd like to get to know you more. I think we have something here." He looked down to her, his lips parted as he delicately moistened them with the tip of his tongue. "You can feel it. Can't you?" She felt her own lips part as he hedged his face closer to his. "Let's just try, and see where it takes us."

She studied his face. She saw the open, honest, raw hope he had. She knew what he was asking. She knew she wanted to say yes. She knew she would say no anyway. He saw the shift in her eyes, the hard resolve setting in the beautiful jade orbs. He knew her answer before she spoke. He stood up straight, shoulders firm, refusing to let her see how her rejection affected him.

She looked down at her shoes, breaking the intense eye contact. "I can't Jacob." She breathed in deeply then let out a tired sigh. "I just can't. I can't split myself in to any more pieces."

He glared at her, still feeling the sting of her rejection. _You think you've got life all figured out? Life is about who is in it with you not what! I don't get it. Why the hell would she fight having friends or relationships. This girl isn't worth the torment. Yes she is, who are you trying to kid Black? _

_Well, you're not tormenting yourself any more, not today anyway. _

"I get it." He pushed the handles of the bike towards her. "Here." She placed her hands onto his across the bars. They were warm and dry. His touch made her chest ache. She reached an arm out to him. "Jake, when I do things, I always give it my everything. If I can't do it 100%... I don't do it." She looked up into his eyes, a stray piece of hair falling across his face, she absently tucked it back behind his ear. "No matter how much I want to."

Snatching his hand out from under hers, he barked. "Whatever Renesmee. Good luck with whatever life you've got planed for yourself. I hope it's worth it." He turned and stamped back to the truck, leaving her standing alone on the path.

_Why does this hurt so much? I barely even know the guy. Not even 24 hours and already my focus is all messed up. _

_Enough already Ness. Enough. Daydream is over. Back to reality. Back to work. _

She turned heading into the house to give the lesson. It felt like a vain attempt to impart her knowledge. The knowledge she had to offer to an over privileged child who had no passion for an instrument that she loved. The kind of love she'd learnt to feel from an old woman who had loved her when life was at its worst.

_Stop feeling sorry for you self Rouge-gorge. _


	6. Chapter 6 Hearing the silence

Renesmee never made it to Dinner that night. She trained well into the evening. Pushing herself to the point of retching. She wasn't sure if it was from the physical exertion or from the emptiness her heart had felt all day. Probably both. She snuck into the dorm after the lights were out. There was a flower sitting on her pillow. He was sleeping in Bella's bed. Bella was on the couch. After a long hot shower she silently crawled in to her bed and cried herself to sleep.

Jacob heard all of it.

The next morning Renesmee woke early. She dressed and crept out, taking her instrument with her. She sat on the steps of the building across form the dorms and quietly played. She played with her eyes shut just like her grand-mere had. She played until her fingers hurt as silent tears, once again, streamed down her cheeks. She cried for the childhood she'd hope for, her mother, her father, her grand-mere, for Jacob. She cried for herself.

Jacob softly followed her out and stood in the window of the main building.

He saw her tears.

Jacob heard all of it.

After a quiet breakfast with Bella, Jacob said his farewells to Bella and he drove away without saying good bye. Renesmee knew he would be leaving that morning and stayed away until he had left. She didn't want to test her strength or give herself the opportunity to explore her weaknesses.

As Jacob drove away he couldn't decide if he was angry, relieved or heart broken. He was decide though. Decided that he'd had enough of waiting for Bella. Decided that he wouldn't let himself wait for Renesme either_. Maybe she had a point when she said 'Life won't hand it to you.' She'd refused to let her life pass her by. Two can play at that game._ As he drove away from the city of Seattle. He made sure he left his obsession with Bella behind. And pushed Renesme out of his mind. Well, he tried to.

When Renesmee finally did shuffle her way back to their room Bella pounced. "Where the hell have you been? You bailed on dinner?" The look of hurt in her eyes took Renesmee aback. She hadn't meant to hurt Bella. She just could be around Jacob. "Sorry Bells, I was training till really late."

"And you were gone again this morning! Jacob left, he said to say Goodbye by the way."

"I was just giving you guys some privacy, that's all." She lied.

"You were more than welcome to hang with us. I hope you didn't feel you couldn't be in your own room. I guess it doesn't matter now any way. La Push is a long way from here. He doesn't have much money for gas. I don't think Jake will be able to visit again for a while."

_ No, I don't think he will._

The semester went on for Renesme and Bella. Renesmee dived head first into her studies. She trained more than ever. If she wasn't at the library she was either at the gym, the track or running around the campus. She quit the orchestra. She hardly played anymore. She had always played to escape reality, to remember all the things she loved, express her innermost secrets and desires. Now whenever she played, memories of the night she had played for Jacob flooded back. She had showed him a piece of herself that she had never showed anyone before. She had let him into her private ritual. The hall, the music, the instrument they all made her think of him. She was trying so hard not to think of him. She was failing. Miserably.


	7. Chapter 7 Aponi

The week before Thanksgiving break Bella found out that Renesmee was planning on spending the holiday alone on campus. There was no way she was going to let that happen. So, after much discussion (mostly from Bella), the pair set off in Bella's truck towards Forks for the short break.

The plan was to have Thanksgiving lunch at Bella's father's home and then head over to Edward's parents' house for dinner. Renesmee felt like she would be the third wheel but Bella insisted.

Arriving late in the evening Bella set Renesmee up in the long sofa in the lounge room. She spent the rest of the evening chatting to Bella's father while he watched highlights of the football, and Bella nattered to Edward on the phone.

Just before retiring to bed, Charlie explained that he had invited Billy and Jacob to share lunch the next day too. Panic shot through Renesmee and she nearly shot up off the couch and hurdled out the door straight to Seattle. But she didn't. She sat on the sofa and smiled, the tension in her lips spelling her mixed emotions. Bella saw her shaken response and wondered what had gone on between her two friends. Had they have an argument? They seemed to have hit it off, then they gave each other the cold shoulder for the rest of his stay? Bell thought about it some more, Ren had been a ghost ever since and Jacob, he had turned into some kind of party crazed horny teenager overnight. _We are having a chat about this in the morning._

The next morning Renesmee heard Bella snuck down the stairs to start preparing the turkey, dawn was just breaking. Renesmee rolled over on the surprisingly comfortable couch and drifted back to sleep. Through the veil of light sleep, she could hear Charley and Bella talking in hushed tones in the kitchen. The small clinks of cooking as breakfast was being prepared. She woke again sometime later to the sounds of the front door opening and closing and heavy footsteps on the floor.

"Morning Bells. Make enough for me too?" Sang out a familiar baritone voice.

She was wide awake now. _Shit. What's he doing here now? I'm not ready for this. I'm not even dressed. Maybe I can just hide under the covers until he leaves._

"Come on, she won't bite" he whispered.

"I know. I'm coming" replied a sweet dulcet voice. "Um Jake, I think we're a bit early."

"What do you mean?"

Renesmee lay flat on her back peering up out of the covers that were pulled up under her chin. She saw a well-manicured finger pointing down at her as two faces leaned over the back of the sofa, looking down to her. Renesmee saw his brows drawn together looking down at her, surprise saturating his tone. "What are you doing here?"

"Bella invited me" she snapped indignantly, sitting up.

He looked at her, drinking her in, he seemed to gravitate unconsciously to her, then he suddenly stiffened, remembering her words that day, weeks ago. "I'm surprised you could find the time. How does this fit into you five year plan?" He replied sarcastically.

Deciding a run would be a good escape, she sighed as she raised off the couch grabbing a sports bra, tights and a winter running shirt out of bag on the floor. She really didn't want to fight with him. She was here in Forks for Bella's sake and she hoped he could be mature about whatever it was that was going on with them.

"It's good to see you too Jacob." Her head was held high as she glided past the couple. The girl thrust out her hand to Renesmee.

"Hi I'm Aponi." She smiled as she looked Ren up and down. _He has a girlfriend._ _ Well, good-on-you, Jacob. _She sighed inwardly_. How on Earth can she look so good this time of the morning?_

Renesmee appraised the girl standing next to Jacob. She was tiny. Maybe five foot two, three? Petite. She wore her long jet black hair parted in the middle her long layers sitting atop her very pushed-up breasts. Her curves were squeezed into a tight, plunging v neck fuchsia top. Her jeans so tight that Renesme wondered how she could bend enough to sit down in them. Her feet were elevated by matching fuchsia platform pumps. As the two girls assessed each other Renesmee noticed the raised eyebrows of the Indian girl. An unkind smirk forming on her face.

Renesmee looked down at herself realising she was still in the clothes she had slept in. She realised, too late, that she was only in her boy leg underpants and a thin white tank top. _Crap!_ She shifted to hold her clothes in front of her chest. She didn't take the outstretched hand to shake. She just blurted out "I'm Renesmee." And took off, bounding up the stairs two at a time "Nice to meet you" she shouted half way up the stairs.

The girl sniggered looking up to Jacob as she wrapped her arms around him. "I don't think she realised what she had on. Poor thing."

His eyes followed Renesmee up the stairs, a constricting knot forming in his chest. "I grantee you she didn't." He replied tight lipped, automatically draping his arm around his girlfriends shoulder. _She's more beautiful that I remembered_. _That hair, all messy from bed. That shirt was awesome. I'd love to wrap my lips around those tits. And those legs, they are _so_ toned. Stop it Jake. Api is great, so many curves to explore, she's so soft, comes from a great Quileute family, she kisses incredibly... I wonder what it would be like to kiss Renesme… Fuck! Could this get any more difficult? _Snapping out of his inner thoughts_, _he motioned, prodding Aponi into the kitchen. "Come on."

Bella was standing at the refrigerator a carton of eggs in her hand. Charlie was sitting at the small table reading the paper, his hand leisurely wrapped around a cup of steaming coffee. The light was filtering softly in through the window, the smell of her delicious cooking in the air. Jake always felt at home in this kitchen. Ever since Bella had come to live with her dad in high school she had enhanced the house into a warm, nurturing kind of home.

"Bella, Charlie, this my girlfriend Aponi." He motioned to her and back towards the members his second family. "Api this is Bella and you've probably seen Chief Swan around."

"Hey." Said Bella. "I've heard so much about you. It's great to finally put a face to the name." Jake noticed an offbeat look in his friend's eye. Charlie took a sip of his coffee appraising the girl over the rim, "Nice to meet you Aponi. Keeping Jake here out of trouble?"

She giggled in response, "I think _he's_ the calming influence on me Chief Swan."

"Are you staying for lunch? You're most welcome to." Inquired Bella's father.

"No. I can't, my parents are having a big family thing for lunch. You know how it is."

"Well, why don't you share a meal with us anyway. Breakfast won't be long." Added Bella.

"That would be lovely, Thanks" she smiled, her eyes bright like a girl in the first flushes of new love or maybe it was lust.

Aponi had had a not so subtle crush on Jake since she was a freshman, him a sophomore in high school. It wasn't until a chance meeting at his friend, Jared's house that he took an interest. The timing had coincided perfectly with his return from Seattle. Him, needing to prove to himself that he didn't need either of the two girls he'd left behind in Seattle, her, happy to have one of the town's most eligible bachelors around her arm.

Aponi pulled out a chair to sit when Jacob stoped her. "I don't know. Don't you have to help your mum?" _God get me out of here. I can't have these three women around the same table._

"Jake, don't be silly! It's not even nine am. Let's stay and eat. You're the one who dragged me over here. Besides," she wiggled her eyebrows at Jake. "I want to get to know Bella better. We'll stay for a little. Mum said I need to be home by eleven." She looked up at him and winked provocatively. Her eyes hooded as she smouldered at him. "We've got loads of time." Proposition drenching her words.

Jake liked the sound of that time-line. His hormones taking over, he decided that they would stay for an hour, which would give the couple another hour by themselves. _ Maybe we'll 'give thanks' to each other in the back of the rabbit. Man, she is lovely. Her lips are so soft. Who cares that Renesmee is here? Her loss... _He was getting good at lying to himself.

He lent over her as she sat at the table. "Ok. If that's what you want." He lifted her chin with his fingers and gave her a deep, open mouth kiss right there at the Swans' kitchen table. "As if I could say no to Bella's cooking anyway."

Renesmee creped quietly down the stairs into the kitchen just as Jake's lips met Aponi's. She felt the lump in her throat as her eyes blazed with jealously. Bella turned to serve the food and saw Renesme propping herself up against the wall. Her body doubled over as if she had been punched in the gut. Bella saw her friends eyes transfixed to the happy couple as they linked fingers, foreheads pressed together as they shared a private joke. _Yeah we really need to talk. _"You going for a run? I'll put some eggs aside for you ok." Asked Bella, giving Ren the excuse she needed for her desperate escape.

Renesmee straightened herself up, a mask of indifference plastered to her face. "I might do about six or seven miles. I'll be back in about an hour to give you a hand." She made her way to a chair to put on her runners. One she was laced up, she rose from the table. "It was nice to meet you Aponi. I'm glad Jacob has someone. You guys look good together."

"Bye Jake." she called as she left the room.


	8. Chapter 8 Cross Roads

**This chapter has a fair bit of Jake and Aponi. Don't hate on him too much. It's partly Renesme's fault too, for being such a stubborn fool. He is a guy with hormones...but a good guy in the end... I think... We'll see.**

**Thanks for all the reviews too. I have been pleasantly surprised by the amount of views this story has got so far. I hope you continue to enjoy this story :-) Marina**

**All characters are owned by SM. I'm just mixing it up a bit.**

* * *

Renesmee set off at a blistering pace. She knew she could never run this fast for that many miles. She just had to get as far away, as fast as she could. After about a mile her lungs burning from the cool November air, she slowed. She stopped on the side of the road. _What have I done? Why can't I get him out of my mind? I'm going insane!_

She felt she was more distracted trying NOT to think about him than she would have been if she had let him onto her heart weeks ago._ Rouge-gorge, you really stuffed this up. But you can do this. _She was planning on just spending a nice few days with Bella, exploring the area. She wanted to give herself a little break_. Sure, I'll have a break, right after this run. _

She set off once again, this time pacing herself. Aiming to run for most of the hour. She hoped Jacob would be gone before she got back. After a good seven miles she returned. As she jogged along Bella's street feeling the endorphin rush she loved after exercising, she saw heading towards her, a little red car. Jacob's car. Renesmee wanted to run off and hide under a neighbours hedge but, she didn't, she kept on jogging. _Head up. Shoulders back. Smile. Quick wave. No stopping._

Jacob had wolfed down the breakfast. Desperate to be gone before Renesmee returned. Eventually, he ushered Aponi out the door. Promising to be back with Billy for lunch at noon.

As they hurtled down the street Jacob allowed himself to feel the relief of avoiding Renesme rush over him. It didn't last for long. He saw a lone figure jogging along the asphalt. He slowed the car minutely and made a simple one handed wave from the wheel as they approached. Aponi however waved both hands, yelling out the window "Bye Renesmee! Nice meeting you!" Renesmee slowed to a walk as she more reservedly waved back, her face contorted in to a lopsided grin. The other hand resting on her hip as she caught her breath. She watched as the car drove past.

"She's actually quite pretty." Commented Aponi surprised. "Did you see how good her legs are? She's a bit tall though. Too much muscle. To butch. Maybe she's a lesbian." she commented bitterly.

Jacob answered with a distracted grunt, "She's almost a professional athlete Api, she kind of needs muscles to hurdle. I don't think she's gay either. She's fit. That's all." He could help but feel the need defend the beautiful girl. Jake leaned his head back on the headrest, thoughtful as they drove on, these were the kinds of conversations that made him regret ever hooking up with Aponi. She was so materialistic, all she saw in people was skin deep. No depth. Renesmee or not, he was beginning to want to distance himself from Aponi. She didn't seem to get that beauty was more than the body and the makeup and some guys wanted more from girlfriends than just _putting out_.

He watched Renesmee in the rear-view mirror. He liked the way her shoulders rolled over her frame. He thought it gave her an air of strength and integrity. He could see the curve of her body even through her winter clothes. Jake though she had an amazing body. One he increasingly thought about. He thought she was beautiful. Beautiful, but off limits.

He continued to watch her in the mirror as she turned towards the direction of his car. He watched as she covered both her hands over her face as she doubled over on the side of the road. Her knees giving way as she crumpled to the ground. He saw her shoulders shaking as if she were sobbing_. Shit, is she crying?_ _Should I go back? What would I say? I'm probably the last person she wants to see right now. Why the hell is she crying like that? _He was broken out his inner monologue by a hand brushing along his jeans, over his crutch. "We've got almost an hour before my mum expects me home." she whispered seductively in to his ear.

He felt his arousal in spite of himself. "Api, I'm not sure that's the best idea right now." He countered. Suddenly nervous as hell.

"Find some where to pull over Jacob or I'll just to do this while you're driving." She instructed as she leant over undoing his fly, reaching into his jeans. Absently, he jerked his foot on the accelerator. She started to work her hands up and down. He franticly searched for somewhere private to pull up, finally finding an old logging path, he turned in, out of view of passing traffic and killed the engine. She clicked off her seat belt and turned to kneel sideways on the seat, one hand braced on his thigh the other wrapped around him as she bend her head down to him. _Amazing, this is amazing. I'm about to get a blow job in the front seat of my car._

His eyes flew open as he realised how his body was betraying his heart. _What am I fucking doing? _ He wanted to stop her. It didn't feel right. It _felt_ incredible, but it didn't _feel_ right. Not in his head or his heart. "Stop Aponi." He quietly requested, lifting her head up and tucking himself back into his pants. They had never been this intimate before. They'd touched through clothes. She'd taken her bra off but left her top on once. But this, this was virgin territory. Literally. For him anyway - He wasn't so sure about her. He doubted it.

"Sorry" he said, looking over the familiar dash of his car, refusing to make eye contact.

"Don't be." She comforted. "I know this is all new for you Jakie. We can go slower. Maybe we could rent one of the cabins one night, Jared's mum could probably give us a good rate."

"I'm not you sure I'm ready for that." Jacob paused, looking contritely at her. "In fact, I'm not sure this is going to work Api."

Disregarding his words, she walked her fingers down his chest, across his abs, poking his crouch. "Jakey, you were the hottest guy at school, probably on the whole res. As if I'm not going to put out for you. I know what guys like and I'm not afraid to give it to them. We'll make it work out." She purred as he scrambled to fix himself properly, feeling very exposed and somewhat like a piece of meat.

"I don't expect _that_ you know? I'm sure it's very nice, don't get me wrong, but... I never expected this either." Gesturing towards his groin.

"You're still a virgin right." She asked. He felt he heard a mocking tone to her voice.

"You're point?" he said, refusing to answer her outright.

"Well, we can fool around some more next time. I can teach you. Get you ready." She shrugged not self-conscious by the turn in the conversation at all. "I wouldn't say I'm that experienced. But I've had a few good lessons myself, if you know what I mean."

Jake gave her an sickened look. "You make it sound like a business contract Aponi."

"Let's call it more of a Sextract!" she smiled, laughing at her own _less that delicate _invented word. "You give me some of that big fella- and it's pretty big by the way, you should be proud - And I'll give you some of this." She gestured, indicating between her thighs. "With the instructions on the box. Pun intended."

He had never heard her talk like that before. It made him a little sick. Did she really have such little self-respect? It's not like he was a prude or saving himself or anything. He just thought his first time would be with someone he loved or could fall in love with. _Someone like Renesme. _ Aponi seemed to view sex as something only physical, a form of currency. No real emotion or love.

He knew he could never really love Aponi. She had been a distraction though. Beautiful. Happy. Apparently very willing. His dad was happy he was with a Quileute girl. But Jake knew this was only a surface deep relationship, nothing more profound. Nothing really long term. He looked into her brown eyes, speckled with gold, her lids heavy with makeup. Jacob thought she looked nice but that it was a little too much 'sparkle' for Thanksgiving lunch.

Aponi stared back at him, eyes smouldering and her tongue flicking along her lips. She leaned forward to Jake, letting the top of her shirt fall forward, showing him the soft undulating flesh lifted up by a very lacy bra. He couldn't help but shift his eyes down to her chest. She knew exactly what she was doing. She launched herself at him. Her arms around his neck as she crashed her lips on to his. Jake kissed her back, though with much less ferocity. She lay both hands on his face as she drew him in for a deeper kiss. Her tongued flicked against his lips requesting entrance. Her hands unbuttoned his shirt and they ran along his chest, rippling down over his abs. His hands habitually slid down over her shoulders and around her ribs, his thumbs brushing against her breasts. _I wonder what Renesme boobs feel like? What would her lips feel like? Against my lips... Around my dick. Jake don't be an asshole. You can't think about another girl while you kiss your girlfriend. But you are…_

He sighed, gently pushing her away from him. Both panting to catch their breath. "We'd better go." he said as he did up his shirt buttons, staring out the windshield.

Silently, she shifted back to her seat, doing up her belt as he started to drive towards her house. He considered what she had said. Confusion, lust and desire clouding his judgement. _Sextract_. _How unromantic. But maybe it would be good to get the 'Big V' out of the road? Or maybe you'll be nothing but a piece of arm candy. And you'd also be acting like a giant Asshole! _He felt so conflicted_. But d_eep down, he knew he couldn't just use Aponi for sex, even if that was what she wanted. That wasn't what he wanted. That wasn't him. The more he thought about it, the less attractive Aponi and her proposal seemed. The more he wanted to end the relationship.

The radio played softy in the background, he hummed along to the ballad, lost in thought. He was snapped out of his musings but a sudden noise as she reached to change the radio station, flicking to a loud techno station. "Much better" she stated, her head bopping to the heavy base. She turned the volume up further, oblivious to the irritation rising in Jake.

"You know it's common knowledge that the driver gets to choose the music." He bristled.

"We'll after what I just offered you, the least you could do is let me pick the tunes." She smiled -too sweetly- at him, eye lashes bating, knowing he'd let her keep the music on. _I doubt Renesme listens to this kind of music for pleasure. _He sighed for the third time that day. He felt a heaviness in his chest, the weight of being with a girl he didn't really like, let alone love, was pressing down on him. He didn't want to do this anymore. He was sick of trying to convince himself that he felt any kind of pull towards her. "Aponi I don't want to do this."

Not understanding him she squeezed his hand, bringing it to rest on her thigh. "Don't worry Jakie, we'll do it together." He really hated being called Jakie. At least, he hated the way it sounded from _her_ mouth. "No Aponi, I mean us. This, us, we aren't working."

She rolled her eyes at him, her thin manicured eyebrow arching at him. "Don't be so dense. Of course we _work_. Look at us! We're like the poster couple for the Quileute First Nation."

"I don't want be a 'breeding pair' Api. There's so much more to a relationship than genetic compatibility." He snapped, exasperated by her xenophobic view. He was silent in thought as he drove, ignoring the incessant beat and shrill synth of her chosen music. Soon, they entered into La Push and Jake turned into her street, pulling into her parent's driveway.

Before she got out, Aponi squeezed Jakes cheek between her thumb and fingers, shaking him like he was a toddler. "Don't worry your pretty little face Jake. We'll talk about it tomorrow ok." She inclined her head to the house. "I got to go. Think about my offer." She kissed his bunched up lips murmuring "sextract" into his mouth as she jumped out of the car running into the house.

He sat looking at the house for several minutes. A feeling of downheartedness swept through him as he thought about the two choices before him. One present and willing. Petite and curvy. Familiar. An open book. But aggravating and shallow.

The other, an enigma, with hidden secrets. Tall and statuesque. Miles of distance between them. Closed off to him. The one he wanted.

There really wasn't any choice though. Renesmee_ was pretty clear about it._ _The way she ran out of Bella's place this morning. Was she crying about me? Should I talk to her about it? Maybe I'll talk to Bella about it._

In the end, Jake decided he'd rather be alone than compromise his morals. He wouldn't use Aponi or allow himself to be used by her in return. He resolved to terminate things, soon. He just had to work up the mettle first.


	9. Chapter 9 Giving thanks and confessions

Well boys and girls, this chapter should help to explain Renesme and all her 'issues' or it might just leave you with more unanswered questions.

Hope you enjoy.

Thanks for all the great reviews too. They make my day!

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Renesme stood up from her huddled position on the road. She felt defeated. She felt hollow inside. She had cried until her tears had given out. All her bottled-up emotions flooding out.

She couldn't stop thinking about Jacob. His dark black eyes. His brilliant smile, lined with straight white teeth. His open, uninhibited laugh. The way his bass voice said her name. She liked him, really _liked_ him. He had asked her to try. See where things could lead. And she had responded by rejecting him with such finality, she wasn't sure there could be any hope for her. She realized now, with a suddenness what she wanted. She wanted to try and see where things could go with Jake. She had felt the connection all those weeks ago in Seattle, but she hadn't admitted it to herself until she had still felt it today. Seeing him with Aponi had hurt her, hurt her more than she had any right to be feel.

She whipped her head up, looking at nothing in particular. A felling of hopelessness washed over her as she stood in the middle of the rural bitumen road leading to Bella's home. The sky grey with threating clouds. The wind whipping against her skin, lowering her body temperature as it evaporated off her sweaty brow.

Renesme was at a loss, she had no experience with men, none. Even in high school her training, her music and her studies left her little time or inclination. Sure, she'd had crushes and her fair share of admirers, but never had she let anyone actually get close. Never had she let down her shield. It was with an empty feeling that now, finally, she felt she was ready to open herself up to someone, allow someone to share the special connection she'd witnessed in those around her, that person was gone. Finally, as she admitted to herself this thing, she found the person she wanted unavailable, unreachable, off limits. The realisation crushed her.

Her logical mind couldn't understand these emotions. She hardly knew him.

But, her instinctive mind, the part of her id that she kept locked away, it was a flutter with desire and longing for freedom. Like a prisoner behind a wall, her heart had found a small chink in the armour and had hammered away until her defences had collapsed.

Only now, she found the view on the other side of the wall was barren and bleak. She had scrambled to rebuild those defences, not wanting to allow herself to be hurt. She wanted to fortify them against the dark knight that was attempting the siege her heart. But her heart had seen the speck of light on the bleak horizon and it fought her barricades.

The truth was, she was scared. Plain and simple _scared._ So many times she had be thrown out like a piece of garbage, left in the corner. She had built those fences up so high, rarely giving anyone a key to her inner vault that kept her heart safe inside. Her parents had left her heart a shattered mess as a small child. Her Grand-mere Sophie had built her back up from the ground.

It wasn't Sophie's fault, but when she had died, Renesme had resented her, resented her for leaving her alone in this big hurtful world before her heart was fully mended. She never wanted to allow anyone to come close enough to injure her heart again. There was only so much heartbreak a person could bare.

She realised with a sense of surprising relief how Jake had just, shined his way in. Her fortifications flimsy and weak against his confidence in her. His confidence in the possibility of _them_.

Somehow, without her even realising it, he had taken up a permanent residence in her heart. She had been forcing herself to push him out. Ignoring the ache, the soul crushing exhaustion that had overcome her the past few weeks as she desperately attempted to forget about him. But Jacobs heart had left a lasting mark on hers. A healing balm on her ethereal scars. A sweet medicine that both numbed and healed the pain. Once it had had a taste, there was no forgetting.

Standing on the side of the cold road, she decided to talk to him. Let him get know her and her him. See if this connection between them was real or just her imagination. But she refused to be some kind of chaste adolescent mistress. She wouldn't try to steal him away. Renesme conceded pitifully that she wanted him in her life any way she could. She wanted to be his friend at the very least- Something was better than nothing. He said he'd wait for her, now, it was her turn to wait for him. She wiped her eyes that she knew would be red and walked the last few hundred feet back to the Swans house. Hope and fear burning through her chest.

Charlie was sitting on his recliner watching the pre-game show as she entered through the front door. "Hey kiddo. Is it cold out there?"

"It's not too bad. I don't notice it once I've warmed up anyway" She replied as she passed into the kitchen avoiding eye contact.

As soon as she walked in there, Bella was upon her. "Right. What's going on with you two? And don't tell me it's nothing. I saw the way you look at him. And the way he looks at you." She reasoned. "Did you two hook up in Seattle? Did you have a fight?"

Renesme whipped the llast of the sweat off her brow, her eyes closed in exhaustion. "Can I take a shower first? Then I promise we'll talk. I need to tell someone."

"Alright" she agreed. "When you're back down I need you to start on the beans too."

"Ok. I won't be long." She smiled her perfect smile as she raced up the stairs. The bathroom was simple and neat. She hopped into the shower and soaped up, enjoying the heat as it washed the sweat and tears away. She lathered up her hair and felt the relief cascade over her scalp as the suds carried away some of the worries of her day. She shaved her legs and scrubbed her face. She dressed in a simple flowing floral skirt just above the knee and a plain white scooped neck cotton shirt. Her shoes an elegant pair of black ballet flats with gloss patent tips. She left her hair out to dry naturally letting her full curls fall down her back.

Feeling refreshed and ready for the inquisition, she made her way down stairs to help in the kitchen.

"Spill it" Bella said as she handed her the packet of fresh beans waiting to be tipped and tailed.

"What do you want me to say? I'm an Idiot and it's too late."

"You are definitely not an idiot and it's never too late. What happened?"

"Well, you already know that I showed him around campus and stuff. I had a really good time actually." She paused in thought. "I played for him. I don't know why, but I played him a piece I wrote myself. I've never played to anyone but my Grand-Mère Sophie."

"Did he like it?"

"Yeah" she giggled. "You should have seen him. I think I dazzled him or something. I think his exact words were, 'that was the single most amazing thing I have ever seen.' I was pretty flattered actually. I don't think he's heard much live music though."

"No, I don't' think he has. Doesn't mean he can't appreciate it though."

"Yeah. I think he's way more open to new things and culture than most guys." she agreed. "Then we went to the pizza place and shared a large. I told him about grand-mère Sophie." She confessed as she continued to prepare the beans.

"Did you tell him about your parents? About Rose and Em?"

"No. I think he knew there was more but he didn't push. I'd only just met him. You know how private I am about my childhood. The weird thing Bella, is that I wanted to tell him. It felt like I'd know him for years not hours. He made me feel like I could trust him with all my secrets. Like, instead of adding another portion of my life to juggle, he could actually put it all into balance for me. I can't explain it."

"You don't need to. I get it. Edward does that for me. It's like he knew my soul the moment we met. "

She continued, needing to get it all out. "Of course then we had the whole bed darkle. He was way too big for that tiny sofa so I offered him my bed. We started off head to tail. Honestly we did. I don't know how I ended up wrapped in his arms."

"I bet it felt good though. Right?"

"Really good" she breathed as the needless waste of her actions crashed around her. "Did you realise we were almost holding hands when you dropped me to that lesson?"

"No!" She squealed. "When!"

"Right there in the truck. Do you remember how I almost forgot my bike and he wheeled it over to me? "

"No"

"I think you were texting Edward or something. Anyway, he kind of asked me out in a weird sort of way."

"He asked you out! Holly shit Ren. What did you say?"

"I said I couldn't. That I didn't have time for boyfriends." Her face was drawn, regretful and despairing. Bella looked at her like she had two heads. "I made a huge fucking mistake Bells." The heartbreak seeping from her voice. "Is it possible to fall in love with someone over night? 'Cause I think I did. And now it's too late, he's got a gorgeous little Quileute girl. How can I compete with that? I'm such as colossal mess. I'm too scared to let anyone in, even when there's such a perfectly amazing, pure hearted man staring me in the face." she ended, wiping away the tears that were threatening to spill. Her resolve to tell Jake how she truly felt evaporating as she thought of the likely hood of rejection.

Bella regarded her friend with a look of disbelief. "You really don't see yourself as you should. You're actually a pretty good catch Renesme. You're intelligent, beautiful, athletic, and creative. So what, you've had an unorthodox childhood. We all have our baggage. Some people's bags are just bigger than others. The heavier the bag the stronger the person is." Bella placed a caring hand on hers. "I'd say you're the strongest person I know Ren... Here, start the potatoes" she added cutting the sorrow surrounding them as she shoved a peeler into her hand. "If he doesn't already know it, he'll figure it out soon." Renesme started to peel the vegetables. "Do you want me to talk to him for you? Suss things out?"

"No. We're grown adults. Not third graders. What would you say to him anyway? 'Hey Jacob, so… Renesme realised she's in love with you. Silly girl. She wants to know, can you break up with your girlfriend please?'" she mocked in a sharp, sickly sweet voice. Self-disgust washing over her. "I don't think so. I'm not going to be some kind of home wrecker or whatever the term is when you're our age. So the point is moot."

"So, do you just want to sit and wait and hope they break up?"

"Yes" Renesme stilled her hands and she turned to Bella. "I am a terrible person, aren't I? Do I want him to be happy? Or only if he's happy with me?"

"Of course you don't."

"I guess, ultimately I really do just want him to be happy. I'll just be waiting... Waiting patiently." She settled with a decided nod of her head as if attempting to convince herself.

The two women continued to chat as they prepared the Thanksgiving feast. Mindful that for their First Nations friends, the day was not a day of celebration but more of a day of mourning. Bella knew the Blacks and many of the other families of La Push took advantage of the holiday though, by eating together with family and friends, just as they were planning to do today.

At twelve oh two, there was a knock at the front door as Jacob and Billy let themselves in. Bella turned to Renesme holding her with both hands on her shoulders, she looked directly in to her eyes and gave her a little reassuring shake. "Are you sure you don't want me to talk to him?"

Renesme nodded minutely. "Waiting patiently" she whispered, a slight tremble in her voice. Renesme could hear the happy greetings of old friends as Billy settled in to catch the TV with Charlie. It wasn't long before Jacob came in to the kitchen. Renesme could feel her heart pumping in her chest. Her stomach a ball of knots.

He entered caring a paper plate covered with foil. "Mrs. Clearwater made some cornbread for us." He explained, lifting the plate onto the table.

"Thanks. You know Jake ,you're nothing, if not punctual." Teased Bella as she handed him a bag of marshmallows to top onto the yams. "I aim to please" he countered. "Everything smells great Bella, how long till lunch?"

"Not long, about fifteen minutes." He looked at the bag of mellows in his hands with inquiry.

Renesme saw his look and offered to help. _I can still be normal. I can't just ignore him._ "Here." she said, quietly taking the bag from his hands. "They're for the yams. It's better if you lay them neatly."

The two stood side by side at the table as they placed the white cylinders row upon row. Their fingers occasionally brushing as they would reach into the bag at the same time. The electric shock between them as powerful as the last time they had touched. She could feel his warmth radiating off him as they stood alongside each other, arms close, but never touching. _Man he smells amazing. What I wouldn't give to kiss my lips along those shoulders. Stop it ness, he's taken. How the hell am I going to get through this lunch?_

Not that anyone could tell by looking, but Jacob was overcome as he walked in to the kitchen. Bella looked pretty, as always in her jeans and shirt. Today, she had on a dressier top, no doubt from Edward's sister Alice. He could sense the love he felt for Bella morphing and cooling into the same brotherly love she had for him. His longing for her dissolving.

Jakes eyes moved over to Renesme who was standing at the counter with her back to him. Her long red-brown hair was falling in ringlets all the way down her back. He felt the butterflies in his stomach as he struggled to swallow. His mouth dry. She turned to face him, not making eye contact. Her top scooped at the front showed only a hint of the mounds beneath. He noticed the way her collar bones rolled over to her strong shoulders. Once again thinking how much he liked the way they weaved over her frame, embodying her strength. Before he could say 'hi' and move closer to greet her, Bella had shoved a bag of marshmallows in to his hand. _What the hell am I supposed to do with these?_ Renesme came to stand next to him and quietly instructed him. _Oh my god. She smells incredible. I don't even think its perfume. Is it her hair? I think it's just her. How the hell am I going to get through this lunch? _

Jake got through the lunch. So did Renesme. They all sat around the table leaning back on their chairs. Tummies full, a drowsy feeling encroaching. The table humming with idle chatter.

"So Renesme. What brings you to the lovely town of Forks this Thanksgiving? Your folks too far away?" Billy asked innocently. Bella shot Renesme a glance, attempting to see if she needed the conversation steered else ware. Ren smiled back at her._ It doesn't need to be secret Rouge-gorge. He did say he wanted to get to know me better. What better way than spilling all the skeletons in the closet. _"Ah. I don't have any parents Mr Black. They died when I was little."

"Oh Renesme I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. And call me Billy, Please"

"You didn't Billy. I don't mind. Today is a day to be thankful. And I am thankful to them, for all the life lessons they taught me." She looked directly at Jacob for the first time all lunch. "I don't want my childhood to be a secret. I had no say in it. And my life is in a totally different direction now." She sat straight in her chair, it squeaked slightly as she watched Jacob, willing him to understand her reasons for refusing him all those weeks ago.

"My mother died from a heroin overdose when I was nine and my father was in jail at the time. He died still in prison, when I was fourteen." Her eyes left Jakes and she looked down at the bones of the bird that were discarded on her plate. "Around the time my mum died, I went to live with my great grandmother. That's when my new life started. She taught me music. Language. Culture. She educated me and she inspired me to have ambition." Her head lifted, her eyes shining as she remembered the old woman she treasured. "She taught me that I could ask more from life than living on the streets and surviving day to day. I'm so thankful to her. For all that she gave me. But more importantly I'm thankful for everything she taught me. I really miss her a lot."

She swallowed hard. "She had a stroke while I was in my junior year at school and had to be placed in a home. She died in March this year." She looked down to her hands that she was wringing, she purposefully relaxed them onto her lap and lifted her chest, raising her eyes back up to her audience. "Thankfully though, I got fostered by the young couple that lived next door to grand-mère Sophie. Before Gran-mere got sick, Rosalie would always come over and help her with chores and groceries. The McCarty's were always so good to us. They didn't hesitate to take me under their wing after her stroke. I was really lucky I could stay in the area I considered my home to finish school. They're down in Tennessee this week with Uncle Em's family. So, here I am. Until tomorrow any way. They're coming to pick me up in the afternoon on their way home." She ended, looking at everyone around the table.

Four shocked eyes were fixed on her. _Shit, this I why I don't tell people. It freaks them out._ Billy spoke first breaking the silence. "Well, you've certainly lived a lifetime of heartache for one so young." He lifted his beer to salute. "Here's to a life time thankfulness, happiness and love, Eh?"

"Life can only get better hey little Robin?" said Bella as they all cheered the Thanksgiving Day. Jacob stared at Renesme. Gob smacked at all she had revealed. _That's why she's so focused. Literally clawing her way out of the gutters. Is that why she was crying this morning? It must be why. _He was earnestly trying to convince himself of it_. _Deep down though, he was holding on to the scrap of hope that it wasn't.


	10. Chapter 10 Try

Thanks AmazonBlack you saved my bacon! here is the new chapter- the correct one!

***The song Ness is singing to herself. _I won't give up_. By Jason Mraz ***

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Just as the girls were standing to help clear the dishes, the doorbell rang. "Speaking of flying. That will be Edward." Said Bella, as she stood and ran to the door. Bella re-entered the kitchen pulling Edward by the hand. He looked like an image from a fashion magazine with his chiselled jaw and tussled hair. He wore a button down collared shirt that hung at his shoulders as if it had been tailor made for him. Bella looked up at him with unyielding adoration as his gaze burned into hers with equal fervour. Their love was so overwhelming it was as if it radiated out from them, lifting those privileged to witness it. It was apparent to Renesmee how in love they both were.

"Happy Thanksgiving Chief Swan. Hi everyone." said Edward. His arm winding around Bella's waist.

"Hi Edward." answered Charlie, "Say hi to your folks for me too, will you? And tell that sister of yours she's welcome for a visit anytime." Nodding at Charlie, he replied. "Will do." Edward turned back to Bella, "You ready? I've got a surprise for you at home."

"I was born ready" she said as she pulled Renesmee up with her. "So, we might leave you men with the washing up. See you later dad." she chirped as she leaned in to kiss his forehead. Renesmee called as she was pulled from the room "Bye Billy, bye Jacob, thanks for letting me stay here Charlie."

Then the girls were out the door. Jacob just sat at the table. He hadn't realised she'd be leaving so soon. He'd figured he'd have all afternoon to steel a moment alone with her. Her absence left a big hole right in the middle of his chest. Charlie stood to start on the dishes. "I think we might have got the raw end of the deal here fellas." he surmised as his eyes scanned over all the dirty dishes.

"Leave it Charlie. I'll do it. The game will be starting soon. You two go and watch it. I'll be in soon."

"You not head over to the Underwood's?" asked Billy. Jake shrugged, scrapping the scraps off the plates. "Na. Aponi's family are going up to the Makah res this afternoon." He paused at the table adding. "I don't think we're going to last much longer anyway."

Billy watched his son with a knowing eye, the Underwood's were a good family but Billy wasn't a fan of the way the teenage girl openly threw herself at Jacob. He'd thought Jake had handled her advances well during high school and he had been surprised when Jake had brought her home for the first time. There was something about her that the long-standing Chief disliked. The loss of her as a potential addition to the family wouldn't be missed.

Jake plied a stack of plates up and started to carry it to the sink, smiling his broad smile he called over his shoulder. "Anyway, I think I'll have some quality male bonding time with my Pa and his besty instead!"

-o~O*O~o-

Renesmee enjoyed the evening with the Cullen family, Edwards mother Esme and his father, Dr Carlisle Cullen were the perfect hosts. They all sat around the lounge while Edward played the piano. His surprise for Bella, was a new piece he had composed for her. It was lovely. Renesmee finally met Edwards's sister Alice and her boyfriend Jasper. Alice was a sprightly girl, with no filter between her thoughts and her words. She treated Bella like a sister and Bella returned the spirit. Alice's boyfriend Jasper seemed to be a good counter point for Alice's exuberance, he was quiet and calm, appraising the social event from the corner couch. Alice was back form college for the holiday having met Jasper on Campus.

Later, they all found out Edward apparently had another surprise for Bella. One that required her staying the night in a cabin he had rented on the coast. He'd even taken the liberty of having Alice pack a bag for her. _How romantic. How the hell am I getting back to Charlie's house? _ As the evening wore on, Renesmee decided to broach the subject with Bella. Bella was worrying over her, acting like the sister both girls had always wanted. "Are you sure you'll be ok tomorrow on your own? You can use my truck if you want to go somewhere. Sleep in my bed tonight ok." Bella fretted.

"Thanks," accepted Renesmee. "I might take a drive around, go for a hike or something. Um, Bella. I was wondering, how am I getting home?"

"Oh Yeah, let me phone Charlie and he can come and get you." She nagged at her boyrfiend as she picked up the phone like she lived there. "Edward, you should have had me drive here so Renesme could get back."

"Sorry Renesmee. I didn't think." He said to Ren, turning to Bella he asked, "Do you need me to drive her?" Bella shook her head as she shushed him. _I swear they are like an old married couple some _ heard Bella explain the situation to Charlie, asking him to come and pick her up. "He's on his way," she said as she hung up the phone. Renesmee said her good nights and decided to wait on the porch feeling overwhelmed by the scene of 'perfect family' before her.

Before long she could hear the sound of gravel crunching as headlights came up the drive. Expecting to see the police cruiser she was surprised to see Jacobs Rabbit pull up next to the front steps.

"I thought Charlie was picking me up." Renesmee said, flustered as she leaned into the window.

"Let's just say he and dad have enjoyed the evening a little too well. If you know what I mean." Jacob chortled. He turned around looking to the front porch as Renesmee climbed into the front seat. "Where's Bella?" he asked

"It's just me. Edward's taking Bella somewhere special tomorrow so she's staying with him tonight."

Renesmee felt the air thicken with tension as Jacob set off. The silence in the car was only interrupted by the purring sound of the engine and the discreet strains of the radio. Neither of the two knew what to say. Renesmee was inert in her seat, afraid any conversation with him would make him more familiar, make her fall further. She hoped a nonchalant reserve would help her heart to wait. Wait patiently.

She thought about their evening together all those weeks ago, how comfortably their conversation had flowed. How right it had felt waking up in his arms. How stupid she had been to choose her fears and ambitions over _this_, whatever _this_ was. The eroding hole in her chest made her shoulders slump in on herself. She sat with her hands folded in her lap as she desperately attempted to blink the threatened tears away. She sat still even though inside she was dying to reach over and hold his hand.

Jacob could feel the sorrow rolling off her. _I have to ask her what's wrong. This is the only chance I'll get. _Out of the corner of his eye, he could see her whispering to the song on the radio. A quiet melody emanated from her lips. "I won't give up on us. Even if the sky gets rough. We got a lot to give. God knows we're worth it." Jacob reached to the volume and turned it up for her slightly. After a few minutes, deciding there was no better time than the present to talk to her, he pulled over the side of the road. Taking her hand in his, he turned to her, his eyes drinking in her face. The moonlight was coating her flawless skin.

"Renesmee, tell me what's wrong. I saw you this morning after we drove past. I hate seeing you like this. What's the matter?" he asked, his voice a soothing plea. She looked back into his deep brown eyes. She felt her sole reflected back in them. His heartfelt concern broke her reserve. "Me_, I'm_ what's wrong Jacob. I should never have pushed you away last time. And now I have to live with the consequences of my actions." He rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb as a silent tear fell across her cheek. "Don't cry Ness." He begged. "What do you mean?" Hope filling him but still needing the conformation from her.

She battered the tear from her cheek, sniffling. "What do you think I mean Jacob? I have to watch you with another woman. I know I have no right to, but…" she dropped her head hesitating, then, deciding to just lay all her cards on the table she added. "I don't want to see you with anyone else."

His fingers drifted up to her face, his hands cupping either side of her jaw. "Do you want to be with me? Do you want to try?" he breathed.

"Yes." She admitted, her voice barely more than a whisper. "I can't function without you." She leaned her face into his hand, closing her eyes she felt the calloused gnarls of his palm. "This last month has been totally shit. I feel like half of me is missing without you. But I don't even know you." _Red robin, shut it. You'll scare him off… _

_But I can't keep this bottled inside any longer._

Jacob clutched her by both wrists, his eyes piercing in to hers. "I was so annoyed with you, you know? I don't know why? Your right, we hardly know each other. I was thinking how much I wanted to give this a chance. I could tell it could have been good- Better than good… But then you shut me out before we could even start it." He licked his lips as he moved closer to her. "I think you're beautiful Renesme. Inside and out. I feel it too. I want to know everything there is to know about you. You make me feel like I can do anything. You keep me grounded." His eyes locked with hers as she looked back up to him. "When I'm with you I feel like I'm whole, I just never knew I was missing anything." He closed his eyes taking a long slow breath, his head gently shaking from side to side. "These last few weeks, I felt like I couldn't function without you either." His eyes were brimming with tears, the same as hers.

She couldn't believe he was saying these thing to her. He still wanted her? After casting him aside without a second thought. Here he was, saying she made him _whole_. She felt she didn't deserved so much from him. But Ness knew she would take all the love he'd lavish on her nonetheless.

His eyes closed as he bent in to kiss her. His lips soft and hot against hers. She reached up as they came together, with hard and tender passion. Her heart was soaring in her throat as his tongue slid between her lips, deepening the kiss. The feeling was immense and overwhelming, and it took all the willpower as she had to put her hands on his chest, and gently push him away. "We can't," she muttered against his lips.

"Why not?" he implored, his heartbreak carried in his voice. "What more do you want? I don't understand Ness."

"It's simple Jacob," she said, her voice quiet. "Aponi. I won't be some other woman on the side."

Jacob had totally forgotten about the girl who had sat, or rather knelt, in that exact seat just that same morning. "You're not Ness. We actually sort of half broke up this morning." He admitted, rubbing the back of his neck, his cheeks flushed. Renesme wondered, was he blushing from getting caught cheating or from the heat of kissing her?

"What does that mean? Half?" she asked disbelieving.

"It means she wouldn't take a hint, that's what it means. But I'll break up with her properly tomorrow. Ok?" he bent his head down so his eyes were lined up with hers. He was overwhelmed by the intensity in her emerald gaze. "Please don't turn away from me again. Promise? Truthfully, she's doesn't mean anything to me. She kind of gets on my nerves if I'm being honest. I don't know why was even with her."

He slammed his palms on to his legs, rubbing along them like he was pacing with his hands, he let out a frustrated breath. "What I feel for you is different. So much more. Much more real. You and me. Us." He griped her by the arms, his giant hands wrapping around her bicep, as if the grip would will her to understand his conviction. "I just know it Ness. Were two halves of a whole. Promise you'll let us get to know each other better. See if we're right?"

"I want to Jacob, but I won't give you any promise you can't accept." He leaned in to kiss her again, then his arms wrapped around her.

"Trust me. I want _you_." He pulled her closer, his cheek leaning on the top of her head. He breathed in the delicious smell of her hair. "You smell amazing." He added, distracted by her physical presence. He looked at the clock on the stereo, _11:15_ "If it wasn't so late, I'd go over and break it off now. I swear, first thing in the morning." He kissed her again, this time with even more passion. His lips parting as he pushed his mouth on hers. He ran his tongue along hers. She moaned into his mouth as she broke away from the embrace. Both hands flat on his chest, gently but firmly pushing him away. Her inner woman screaming for her to continue, her conscious won though_._ "I told you when I do something, I do it 100%. And that includes relationships. And it definitely includes my integrity. This," She indicated, her hands flicking between the two of them. "This isn't happening until you're free to do it properly."

"Okay, as much as I don't want to admit it. I get it." He conceded.

"But when you _are_ free. I'll be waiting. Waiting patiently for you." They smiled across at each other, letting the energy that was surging around them stitch their souls together. He turned, starting the car, seizing what small victory he could. "Let me take you home" he said, as they set off along the road, his fingers interlaced through hers. Renesme looked down at their hands. Unsure if this was crossing the imaginary line she had drawn. She left it there in any case, giving him a little reassuring squeeze.

- o ~ O * O ~ o -

As they arrived at the house the sounds of merry singing could be heard wafting through the window. "Sounds like they've continued to enjoy the evening." She said as they entered the house.

Jake slapped his father on the arm "Come on old man, you're too ancient to be drinking like a frat boy."

"Oh loosen up Jake. We're just remembering all the things we're thankful for." slurred Billy as Jake wheeled him to the door. Charlie, who was in a slightly better condition, stood to help. Renesmee stood in the door way as she watched Jacob lift her father in to his car. Billy called from the vehicle. "Oh I forgot. Renesmee, you're invited down to Second Beach tomorrow. We're having a salmon bake and a bonfire. I thought you might like to hear some of the tribe stories." She scanned over at Jake who looked as though the event was a surprise to him. His eyes met hers as he smiled a nervous smile. "That would be lovely. What time?"

"Any time after lunch. We'll be starting the fire up around two. But I'm sure it'll go well into the night."

"Thanks Billy. I'd love to come. But I won't be able to stay too long, my foster parents are picking me up to take me back to Sequim around four." She smiled, genuinely touched that she had been so easily accepted into the small community. She waved as the car backed out the driveway and returned to the kitchen to make herself a tea. Charlie said his tipsy goodnights and headed upstairs to sleep it off.

She was at the kitchen counter waiting for the kettle to boil when she heard the hurried footsteps on the floor. She turned in time to see Jake as he dashed across the room. He pulled her into his arms, his lips frantic against hers. She returned the kiss with equal fervour. Her hands combing through his long black hair. Standing in front of each other, their bodies were pressed together. He could feel her breasts pushing into his chest the way they rose and fell with her gasping. She could feel his desire growing as it pressed into her stomach through his pants. She stopped him before things could get too out of hand. "What was that for?" she asked leaning her forehead into his shoulder.

"We forgot the leftovers. I was more than happy to run up to get them." He laughed. "Do I need a reason to kiss you?"

"Yes you do. While you still officially have a girlfriend any way." she scolded as she pecked him quickly. She went to the fridge to fetch the leftovers. He watched as she bent over into the fridge and couldn't help but come up to her from behind holding her by the hips. She squealed and stood up straight as she battered his hands away. Her face flushed a bright crimson. "Wow Jacob. Slow down. This is all new to me." She handed him the tin foil package, avoiding eye contact.

"Oh. Sorry Ness. You know you have a naturally amazing ass? By body just responded on its own. I am a boy remember. We don't always think with our brain."

"My ass is only from a direct result of many, _many_ lunges and stairs. I did happen to notice that you are indeed a boy and it's pretty easy to guess what you were thinking with. But until you're a free agent, hands off." She smiled, eyes wide in a fun tease.

He cocked his head to the side and thrust out his bottom lip in a childish pout. "So am I forgiven? You'll come tomorrow?"

She giggled in spite of herself. "Yes and yes. Now go. Your dad's waiting." She placed her hands on the small of his back and marched him to the door. "See you tomorrow. _Attendant patiemment_" she warbled as he bounded down the porch steps.

He paused and turned to look at her, "What does that mean?" his wide, perfect smile flashing in the darkness.

"Just that I'll be waiting patiently."

"It'll be worth the wait." he called as he hoped into the driver's seat and sped down the road.


	11. Chapter 11 Up in smoke

The next morning Renesmee slept late. She could see the sheets of rain as they fell on the window. Any chance of a jog washed away. She could hear Charlie shuffling around the house down stairs. Feeling more comfortable alone she decided to stay up in Bella's room for a while. She chose a book from Bella's expansive collection and settled in to read. It wasn't long before she was distracted by thoughts of Jacob.

She wondered how he was this morning. Was he in the middle of breaking Aponi's heart? How attached to her was he really? How far had they gone together? _He seemed to know what he was doing last night. God. I have no clue. Would it be weird to talk about that sort of stuff with him? Will I _do_ that sort of stuff with him? I guess so. Eventually. How is this going to work? We live 4 hours away from each other. A long distance relationship. I'm not afraid of a little hard work... Somehow, I don't think it will ever be hard with Jacob. Hard, he sure was hard last night… Oh God._

She threw herself down on to the bed. Looking at the time, she noted with frustration she still at three hours to wait. In an attempt to calm herself, she lay on the bed, focusing her breath she begin a breath meditation, it wasn't long before she drifted into a peaceful rest, filled with thoughts of him.

Jacob woke that morning with the intention on going over to see Aponi first thing. However, his father had other plans. Billy had Jacob taxiing all kinds of things over to the Clearwater's home. Their place was closest to Second beach so was used as a holding space before tribe bonfires. It was mid-morning before he had a chance to drive over to Aponis's family home. He arrived and parked in the driveway careful to position the car for an easy getaway. He really didn't know how Aponi was going to take the break-up. He figured she be more upset about being dumped that by actually losing his affections. Even more so, the loss of the opportunity to use him as a status symbol.

The though left a bad taste in his mouth as he again wondered why he was even with her in the first place. She reminded him of a strangler vine. Stunning in full bloom, luscious green leaves as it weaved its way up into the rainforest canopy. It seemed beautiful until you realised it was killing and smothering the plant it clung to, until all that was left was the empty shell of the tree that once stood having sucking all the life out of it. It was probably a little harsh, but that was how he felt. Strangled.

He approached the front porch with his speech running through his mind. Determined to make her listen to him. Before he could knock at the door her little sister Fern, came outside. "Hey Jake. Api's not here, she stayed at our cousin Winona's place last night. They're getting a ride with Leah's cousin Emily, they should be here in time for the Bake." She said as she grabbed her bike from the side of the porch. "Ah. Ok. Thanks Fern. Do you know if she'll be home first?"

"No idea, sorry. See you." she called as she peddled away.

_What am I gunna do now? Can I break up with her at the bonfire? What if she makes a scene? I don't wanna wait 'till after, Renesmee will be there... Crap._

_- o ~ O * O ~ o -_

Jacob offered to help set-up on the beach. He collected driftwood along the beach and helped set up the great wire racks that the red fish would be laid upon. The sun was shining over the dunes as Jake kept glancing over to watch for them, waiting for either girl to arrive. Of course, both arrived within minutes of each other. Aponi and her cousin shimmied down the sand to where Jacob was standing. Wearing a tight fitting, white dress, it was long sleaved, cut low at the neck and high at the legs, her 'fuck me' boots came to just above the knee. She pressed herself into Jake, her arms circling his neck as she reached up for a kiss "Hey babe" she crooned. "Hey Api," he answered robotically, his head turning so that she could only kiss his cheek.

As he tuned, he saw Renesmee walking over the dunes, her gaze focused on him. She had on a simple blue and white striped boat neck shirt, navy slacks and a white cardigan over her arms. He saw the way her hair was a mess of curls as the ocean gust whipped it around her head. He watched her for a split second before turning back to Aponi. "I need to talk to you, can we go somewhere private."

"Have you thought about our _Sextract_" she purred as she walked her fingers up his chest. "Do you want to go over some of the fine points?" She cupped his groin, clipping the word 'point' her body pressing against him still. He turned to see if Renesmee was watching their exchange but she was looking down to her feet.

The sun was directly behind her giving her an halo, he could see a slight slump in her shoulders as he watched her golden silhouette look down over him like an angel. He flickered his gaze, attempting to adjust his eyes to the light, the slump in her posture was gone, her strong athletic frame supporting her again. "No Aponi. I just want to talk." He could smell the alcohol wafting off her breath. "God have you been drinking? What are you doing? All the Elders will be here. Your parents are around too. Are you crazy? " He piqued, taking her by the elbow to walk her down the beach. They needed to go some where private for this discussion. Somewhere she couldn't make a scene.

She unlinked there arms and wound her fingers through his, seductively rubbing her nails of the other hand up and down his arm. "Oh Jakey. I was just getting the party started a little early. You could do with a little liquid courage yourself." He ignored her jibe as he continued to walk, looking out over the Pacific. The sun had shown up a little after lunch and the sky was pleasant with small wisps of white streaking across the powder blue. The waves came crashing in as the wind blew a fine mist of spray into the couple.

Jacob was unsure how to begin, he just wanted this to be over. "Did you have a nice thanksgiving?"

"Yeah it was ok. Had enough of my parents for a while though. It was good I could stay with Winona. She's going to stay the rest of the weekend."

"That's good." He paused working up the courage to go on. He stopped, thinking they has walked far enough, he turned to face her, unwinding his fingers from hers. "Api, I think we need to stop seeing each other." _There, I've said it._

"What do you mean Jacob?"

"I mean, I don't want to go out with you anymore. I mean it. It's over." He clipped the words by adding a criss-cross motion with his arms. He had a tone of finality in his voice.

"Why? I still don't get it? I'm like, the hottest girl at school. Everyone knows we're perfect for each other." She was looking at Jake with her hands on her hips. She was definitely more irritated by the impact this would have on her image rather than actually being hurt by them splitting up.

"On the outside we might be. But we don't have exactly the most riveting conversations."

"You want to talk more?" Her eyebrows were raised in seer disbelief.

"No. Yes. I want to _want_ to talk to you. I want a relationship. Not some booty call." He explained, his voice lowering to a mutter, his self-loathing palpable. He thought about the soul searching conversations he had already shared with Renesmee and truly understood just how little he had shared with Aponi, all it had ever been was physical. The girl looked at him, comprehension washing over, indignation set into her eyes.

"You're so stupid, you know that? I just think you're still in love with Bella." She accused. "God Jacob, when are you gunna get it through your thick skull she's not in to you? She's practically married to Cullen." She leaned towards him, poking his chest with her fingers, each stab emphasizing every insult she threw at him. "You're poor, you have no prospects for college and you're stuck in this god dammed place." She pushed him with both hands, palms flat against his chest. Jake just staggered back, then righted himself, taking all her wrath face-on. She rambled on, talking to her drunken self. "I knew it was a bad idea meeting her yesterday." She turned back to Jacob, hands back on to her hips. Spite and venom in her words. "Did you get to compare us side by side? Did I not stand up to little Miss perfect and her perfect world?"

"I'm _not_ in love with Bella. She _is_ my friend though, so I'd appreciate you not talking about her like that." He yelled back. He paused and shut his eyes, not liking the way the exchange was headed, he took her by the hand giving it a chaste squeeze, his voice a soft rumble. "Come on Aponi, don't make this harder that it has to be."

"I'll make this as hard as I like Jacob Black. Now leave me alone." She spat as he marched back toward the gathering.

He followed a good 20 feet behind, not wanting to have anything further to do with her that day. Jacob mused about how poorly she had taken his ending it. He really felt like a piece of shit, it didn't seem right, breaking up with one girl to have arms wide open for another only minutes later. Jake sat down on the soft sand looking out to the waves as they crashed, slamming into the sand sending up a splash of white foam. He toyed with a smooth stone as he watched the small ebb of tide creep its way up the shore line only to once again be pulled back to add to the next wave.

Wishing he had never given in to Aponi's advances, Jake thanked the spirits things had never progressed any further sexually. His self-worth already taking a pummelling, he very much disliked being nothing more than a status symbol for a girlfriend. He wanted a partner, someone who would love him for him, Jake, the person inside, more than the muscles and the face and the family name. Jake thought about the girl he wanted to have his arms around and his spirits lifted. Ness was better than him in every way, but there she was, waiting for him on his home lands. His soul had just been waiting for Ness to come back to him. The eighteen year old teenager in him just got a little distracted. He stood up, dusting the sand off his pants, throwing the stone into the surf and jogged back to the bonfire.

As Jacob reached the get-together his eyes scanned the crowd for Renesme. She was nowhere in sight. A sick feeling settled into his gut. _Is she ok? Maybe she's gone for a walk while she waited for me. A swim? No, it's too cold for swimming. _ Bella and Edward had arrived and were wandering down the sand towards him. He rushed over to meet them. "Bells, have you seen Renesme?"

She shook her head, shrugging, "No, Why?"

"She was here before, but now I can't find her. I'll ask your dad." He rushed over to Charlie who was chatting with his dad. His heart was in his throat. "Charlie have you seen Renesmee?"

The Chief of police took a swig of his beer before answering. "Yeah, she left a little while ago with her folks or whatever you call them. She said to say good bye and that she couldn't "wait" as long as she'd thought'." Jakes heart sank, confusion and panic crashing through him. Charlie continued, his eyes unfocused over the ocean as if he was picturing the scene in his mind. "They seemed like real nice folk. You should have got an eye full of that foster mother of hers. Stunning!" He said like the eternal bachelor her was. He held out a set of car keys. "Oh here. Can you give these to Bella for me? Renesme left them." Jacob took the keys as he shuffled back to Bella and Edward. He didn't understand. Why couldn't she have waited 5 minutes? She promised. His chest ached and his eyes began to burn. His mouth was dry as his breath caught in his throat.

"Here, Renesmee left with her foster parents already." He held up the car keys, his voice as deflaite das he felt.

"What? Why?" Bella slowly reached up for them, her hands frozen in mid-air. "I was really hoping to see Rose." Bella regarded Jacob with a knowing eye. Her hand snapped back down as she folded her hands across her chest she stepped towards him, ire in her posture. "What did you do Jacob? Did you hurt her? Cause if you did, I swear to God!"

"No!" he yelled back. "Relax Bella. I didn't do anything!" his shoulders slumped as he flopped down on to a large piece of drift wood. "At least, I don't think I did. I just broke up with Aponi. Like, just now." he cried, running his hand through his hair. "And I came back to see Renesmee and she's gone. I didn't even get to say hello to her… let alone good bye."

"Why don't you phone her Jacob?" Edward suggested taking his phone out of his pocket. Bella snatched the phone out of his hand. "Let me. She might actually talk to me."

Bella rang Renesmee's number. "It's going through to her mail box." She whispered. "Hi Ren it's just me. I was wondering why you left so soon. Hope you had a good night last night. I'm sure Jacob got you home safe and sound." She turned her body away from the men in a futile attempt to hide her conversation from Jake. "Jacob just broke up with Aponi by the way. This is definitely not wait patiently, this, this is just plain, running scared little bird… Any who. Call me back. Bye"

Renesmee sat in the back seat of the SUV, staring out the window. She watched as the tall cedar forest of the Olympic coast flicked by. _I'm such an idiot. What was he hoping to do? Keep a little on the side? Something for the weekdays at home and then come visit me on weekends?_ _Well there's no way I'm into that. Oh God Jacob, how could I have been so wrong about you? _Her phone rang, she looked down to check it and saw Edward's number flashing up. She pressed the reject button, not wanting to have that conversation in the car with Rose and Em in ear shot. When she got home she'd call Bella back, just not now. Soon the voice mail chimed, not bothering to check it she stuffed her phone into her bag and gazed back out the window. She watched as the forest morphed into the luscious costal rainforest.

She stared out that window as the tears silently fell.

She said goodbye to the boy she thought she knew better than anyone else. Good bye to the boy who she never really knew at all.

* * *

**Oh silly Nessie, jumping to the wrong conclusions, you self sabotaging fool. Will he run after her? or has she broken his heart one too many times.**


	12. Chapter 12 Hiding

When they arrived back in Sequim, Renesmee settled in the room Aunt Rosalie had made for her. It was simple, small and hers. Rose had left it just as she had furnished it while Ren lived with them in High School. It was a creamy soft room, with alabaster painted walls and white washed wood furniture. Her desk was littered with books and papers. Her Great grandmothers Last Will and Testament sat in a large manila envelope centred on the desk. She sat on her double bed as she gazed out the window. It overlooked the house next door. Her Gran-Mère Sophie's house.

The rambling garden was still growing out the back, though now weeds were beginning to take over. The house lay empty now, waiting on the lawyers to decide who gets what piece of the house she called her home. Her Great Grandmother had left the majority of her estate to Renesmee but her Grandmother had taken exception to this and was attempting to contest the will. Sophie's daughter, Elizabeth, was never present in the girls life. Marie, Renesme's mother, had been thrown out of the family home after falling pregnant with Ren at fifteen. The family had never been close after that.

At age ten, almost nine months after her mother's death, Renesme had been living with her Grand Mère Sophie for a year, Sophie had taken her to met her biological maternal grandmother for the first time. They visited a handful of other times, but a relationship never developed. There was a coldness about her. It saddened her that her own flesh and blood could be so distant and it upset her now even more that she could be as petty and greedy as to contest the will.

Elizabeth had never visited Sophie as she lay paralysed after her stroke. She had never stay at the home every evening to spoon feet her. She had never sat quietly by her bed reading her old French novels. And Elizabeth was defiantly not there, holding the old ladies hand as she took her last breath. But Renesmee was.., as a seventeen year old girl she'd lovingly cared for the dying woman. It offended Ness that now, after Sophie's death, that her grandmother had the audacity to demand a larger portion of the estate. It turned out her Great Grandfather had been quiet an astute investor decades ago and there were a network of properties around the Pacific Rim, as well as substantial amount of blue-chip stock. Ness would give it all away if it meant having her Gran-mere back and healthy with her. But she knew she couldn't have her back and she didn't want to give Elizabeth the satisfaction of an easy win fall.

Deciding that she had put off the inevitable long enough, she sighed as she picked up the phone to call her friend. The phone answered on the first ring. "Hello?"

"Hey Bella. It's me."

"Renesmee! Are you alright? You just took off. Why didn't you wait to see us?"

"I'm sorry. I just didn't want to see him. Em and Rose arrived and I didn't want to keep them either."

"What do you mean you didn't want to see him? He broke up with his girlfriend for you Ren! He was so freaked out. You should have seen him. He's really hurting Renesme. Aponi and her possy are giving him a hard time too."

"Bella, you didn't see him with her. They were all over each other. I don't know what he told you but they sure looked cosy. Last night we talked about it. He knows I won't get involved with someone who's already in a relationship. And I sure as shit won't be the other woman."

"Ok. I hear you. But for what it's worth I still think you should call him."

"What would I say 'Hey Jake, sorry I ran out on you. So, did you break up with your girlfriend for me? Because I saw you guys kissing and then she touched you're schlong. Oh, you did break up with her! Well that's great. I guess I'll see you in a few months over the summer then.'" She huffed. "Come on Bella, we're just kids. We hardly know each other either." Her words were flowing, hoping that the more she tried to convince Bella, the more she'd believe all the excuses herself. The less it might hurt. "I've seen how hard it is for you to be so far away from Edward and you guys were together for years before college. We were probably destined to fail anyhow. All I'm doing is cutting it off before either of us get hurt." She was hurting anyway.

"Ok, Ok. Would you talk to him if _he_ called you? I could talk to him for you." She offered.

"No please Bella, don't. Don't get involved. I don't want you to get stuck in the middle of all this."

"Will you at least think about calling him?"

"All right I think about it"

"Good." she paused on the other end of the line. "You need a lift back to school on Sunday?"

"If you're offering, it'll save Em the trip. I've decided to get my own set of wheels soon, by the way. I think I have enough saved."

"Finally! I'm so sick of hauling your sorry ass around Seattle!" Bella mocked.

"Yeah right. You love the glory of being my personal chauffer, don't lie!"

Bella laughed at that. "Your right I love all the glory. Ok. I'll see you Sunday."

"Thanks Bells."

"No worries babe. Promise me you'll think about it."

"I will. I will." Renesme soothed.

"Bye Ren"

"Bye"

After Renesmee hung up from Bella, she sat on her bed staring at her phone. She flicked through her contacts finding the number Jacob had given her. Her thumb hovered over the call button. _What will I say? Will I believe him if he says he broke up with her? Even if he has, we can be together? We won't __see each other for months, we live hours apart. This whole thing is shit. Just shit. _She thought about how her heart had sunk as Aponi ran her hands over his body_. _She felt empty inside. Her soul seemed shattered, with a big missing piece back in La Push. But she wouldn't let her self be nothing more than a girlfriend of convenience. The scars on that heart of hers opening up and bleeding out. She forced herself to rebuild that wall, brick by brick. She pressed the end button on the phone as she threw hard it against her door. All her frustrations and pain boiling over.

- o ~ O * O ~ o -

The two friends returned to Seattle to continue the rest of term. Bella never asked Renesmee about the Jacob issue. Renesmee threw herself into her training and study. She did all that was asked of her and more, pushing her body to its maximum. But her heart wasn't in it. She found it hard to focus, hard to sleep, hard to eat. She drew into herself. Red felt like an empty broken eggshell that had been placed back together, but the cracks were still evident and the shell fragile, waiting for a small pressure to break it all over again.

As part of her nursing degree Renesmee was attending Harborview Medical Centre for two weeks on a clinical placement. The hours were long and she found she gained quite a lot of perspective during her time in the children's ward. After a tyring bus ride home and a particularly disturbing day involving an abused seven year old little girl. Exhausted, Ren arrived home to find a homemade CD of classical music on her pillow.

She lay on her bed sinking into the softness and she played the CD, letting herself get lost in the music, forgetting the troubles of her day. As Bach's Cello suite No.1 began to play, weaving its music around her, her mind drifted to thoughts of Jacob and the night she had played for him. She remembered the way it had felt to have him hear her song. How freeing it had felt to let that hidden secret part of her shine, the sense of sharing, of right, of belonging. It had been so easy to let him in that night. She's been herself without even meaning to. And if she was being honest with herself, she knew- even back then- that it had felt so very, very right. _Then_ w_hy did I fight it? I fought it because I'm a stubborn, scared, fool. That's why. __And Aponi... maybe Bella was right. Maybe Jake did break it off with her and she was just a slut. _

An image of them on the beach that day flashed through her mind, pushing that down, Ren closed her eyes and imagined him instead troweling through a friends music collection, putting together this assortment for her in a romantic gesture. She griped her pillow and hugged it to her chest. The pillow he had slept on. She couldn't stop thinking of him. She didn't want to be away from him anymore. Her defences were crumbling again.

It was a less than a month before Christmas and the middle of their exam week when Renesme asked Bella if she'd spoken to Jake, what she might have said to him about her running away like a scared little child. "Nothing. I swear." She answered. "I didn't say anything to him about it. You asked me not to and I respected that. No matter how much I disagreed with it."

"He didn't ask about me?" Renesme inquired, taken aback and secretly a little hurt he hadn't.

"Of course he did. He called me about a hundred times trying to find out what was going on. All I told him was Rose and Em had arrived early and you had to go back to Sequim with them. And when you wouldn't answer his calls, I told him I didn't want to get involved and that was that." Bella regarded her friend, sincerely hoping that her two best friends could make a go of things. "Why the sudden interest Ren? You want me to talk to him over Christmas break. I'm sure I'll be seeing him.

"No. I just want to know how his doing? You think he really broke up with her?

"Yes. I do. He was so uptight after you left Ren. You're both stubborn people, but I think you win in the '_I've decided and I don't want to hear it'_ category." Bella was scooping up her books and stuffing them in her bag as she prepared to head down to the library. "You two need to communicate better. Or at least hear him out. You look like crap, I hear you tossing and turning every night. I can see you're not happy Red."

Renesme looked down at her fingers as she played with her finger nail, flicking it with her thumb, over and over. The sound was sharp and exact, like a ticking clock bringing her closer to the decision she was trying to find the courage to make. "I think I might message him a happy Christmas or something. Kind of like a yuletide olive branch." She mused over her thoughts, as the last of the bricks were knocked off the wall.

The girls got through their exams. Renesmee continued to balance her Academic and Track commitments. Her training focused on her specialty event in preparation for the coming summer. Her cello still sat in the corner of the dorm room, untouched and unplayed.

The winter break arrived and Bella took Renesmee to her foster parent's home on her way back to Forks. Renesmee was planning on spending a week or so with Rosalie and Em and then would make her way to Bella's father's home in time to celebrate the New Year with her best friend. She wasn't sure when or if she'd see Jacob or how he'd react if he did see her. The thought frightened her. Had she messed it all up? Blown her only chance- her second chance. Would he give her a third? There were something you just couldn't come back from. She could only hope.

- o ~ O * O ~ o -

The night of Christmas Eve, Renesmee decided to send her olive branch to Jacob in the form of a text. She sat looking out her bedroom window as the snow started to filter down. She felt the butterflies flick in her stomach as she wrote and rewrote the message.

_*Hey Jake. Merry xmas. Sorry I took off aftr thnx giving. I shouldn't hav just ran w/o getting your side of the story. Sorry. I'm coming to stay with Bella on the 31__st__. See you for NYE? Start the year fresh? IMU Renesme X *_

She sent the text before she lost her nerve. Then she forwarded the message to Bella. _*this is just what I sent Jacob. Too much? Tell me if he mentions it. RR*_

Her phone chimed back, she expected it to be Bella reading every detail into the words. She looked at her phone, she was surprised to see a response from Jacob so soon. She could feel her pulse begin to race, her hands damp as she opened the message.

_*Hey yourself. Did you realise that was the first time u've called me Jake? I like it. Sorry you had to see me with A. Totally not how the day was meant to go. My friend Quill is having a nye party. You and B&E should come. A fresh start would be good. I have some g8 news 2! MU2 XxX J Jake. Ps why does B call you red robin?*_

"Well that was easy." She said to herself as she replied to him, a smile paltered across her face. _A__ little too easy._ She looked at the "MU2 XoX" he'd written. _Does he know that 'x' means a kiss? Does he really miss me? Was he just being nice? Polite? Maybe he was just asking me to the party because I'm staying at Bella's and she was invited too? Did he just want to be friends now? Oh God. I left for it too long! _She was starting to panic, all her fears were being realised. She didn't want to put herself out on that ledge. It was so frightening to Rouge-gorge, the little, half-starved, dirty girl that Sophie had brought home was scared to fall.

She remembered the resolution she given to herself-and to him. Try. She needed to at least try and find out. And trust him. Could she handle only ever knowing friendship from him? She doubted it. But she needed to step out on to that ledge if she was ever going to know. He'd messaged her with a light and happy tone. It was so like him, she thought, cheerful and easy. She decided to keep with the tenor and reply as if it was the night before the bonfire and that the last six weeks never happened_. But they did_. She bushed that though out of her mind and typed a reply back.

_*Totally there for NYE. My GM Sophie used to call me Rouge-gorge, its French for red robin. I think it was my hair or something. I'll c if B has anything planned for NYE. G8 news? Can't wait to hear it. gNite xox RR*_

He replied back straight away, as if he was waiting for her message with the phone open in his hand.

_*B says hi. She's my place with her dad. She's trying to read over my shoulder. Not letting her see. Can't wait till nxt week. Nite. Ps I like everything about yr hair.*_

Renesme giggled as she imagined Bella trying to see what Jake was writing. In her mind she saw his brilliant smile flashing across his face and she hoped we was happy. Or maybe she hoped he wasn't, that he'd been as miserable without her as she had been. Either way she hoped he'd give her a chance... for a third time.

She sent a message to Bella. _*y didn't u tell me u were there? Come with me to NYE Prty? Stop looking over his shoulder, let him think he has _some_ secrets from u… He likes my hair btw.*_

Renesme enjoyed her Christmas with her foster parents. It was quiet and homely. She felt a sense of peace as she relaxed in the house she had spent much time in as a young teenager. She spent the cold snowy days in Em's garage gym, training for the upcoming invitational meets. On a shelf of the garage she saw her father's old guitar case. She looked at the old tattered black case, scattered with worn stickers.

She couldn't help but be transported to her days as a child, listening to her father play on the streets of the city. He had told Renesme that his father had taught him to play. She had no idea her her fathers family were. He'd always maintained he didn't have any parents. She didn't now what the truth was. Her mother was pregnant when she had runaway with him, they'd fled to Chicago and got stuck into the drug scene pretty quickly. She always assumed he was from Seattle too but, now she'd never know. Masen was a pretty popular name so she thought she'd never find out who his family were. M_y family too. _He was a talented guitar player and someone had to have taught him to play just as he had taught her. He had taught her to a small but solid repertoire of songs, he always maintained they got more money when she played. People always payed big for kids who were busking. It was one of the only happy memories she had of her early childhood. The memory was tainted though, because, as soon as the velvet lined case had filled with enough cash, her parents would be on the door of the local dealer, ready for their next hit.

She reached up and took the case down and darted to her bedroom. She sat down on her bed and opened the case. Her fingers ran along the strings. The wood was smooth and warm. Her hands strummed over the threads, she couldn't help herself. She skilfully tuned the guitar then started to play the song she first learned as a child, 'Yesterday' by the Beatles. She felt her eyes betraying her as they brimmed with salty tears. She looked up as Rosalie dipped her head through the doorway of her room.

"I haven't heard you play for ages. I love it Red. Keep going." She prompted. Rose sat with her legs folded under her on the old sofa in her room.

The girl started playing again, the chords blending into one as she sang with the music. Her voice was strong and true. "Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay, oh I believe in yesterday." She stopped abruptly, her hands across the sound hole.

"What's wrong?" asked Rose, her voice laced with concern. Ness stared at the lavender filled vase on the night stand, the violet heads popping out of the crystal, the familiar scent a calming influence on her.

"Nothing. I just… this song isn't me anymore. My life _used_ to be troubled. Not knowing where we'd sleep one night to the next. Always a little hungry, a little dirty. Now, my life is good. Great. Amazing." She turned looking at Rose directly. "I never knew the security of a home before you guys and Grand Mère. I don't think I've thanked you enough for every thing you did for me. I don't want to imagine where I'd be now if I stayed in Chicago."

She sighed as she ran her finger over the edge of the guitar. "The vulnerable, homeless, illiterate child within me… she misses my parents." She stated flatly. "But the realist, the strong, achieving woman I want to be, she knows it was the best thing that _ever_ happened to me." Her voice breaking with emotion. "It just kind of hit me, you know?" she leaned her elbow on the guitar her chin resting in her hand. She continued, mumbling into her knuckles. "I think sometimes Rose, I carry a bit of a chip on my shoulder." Ness huffed out a stifled laugh at her gross understatement. "I know I defiantly keep people at an arm's length." She sat up straighter, her arm levered over the wood. "And I've…I've just decided… I don't want to do that anymore." Rose moved to sit on the bed with the girl. Her arms around her surrogate daughter.

"Who do you want to let in Rouge-gorge?"

Renesmee leaned into her warmth. "There's a guy in Forks, he's a friend of Bella's."

"What? That's great baby." She smiled and brought Renesmee in for a motherly hug.

"Do you know La Push?" Ren asked, Rose nodded her assent. "He lives there with his father."

"He's Quileute? I bet he has beautiful hair."

"Yeah. He's rather beautiful." She sighed, a glint of first love in her eyes.

"So, are you two being safe?"

"We're not even officially going out Rose, settle down." Her cheeks burning. She muttered, embarrassed, as she replaced the guitar back into its case, shutting the lid. "I've been on the pill for years, remember? Grand Mère was very progressive if you recall?"

"She was, wasn't she?" the two of them giggled together, the room was quiet for a while, both remembering the glorious old French woman. "Are you seeing him tomorrow?"

"Yeah. He's invited me to his friends new year's eve party."

"You know they say, how you spend New Year's Eve will be how the rest of your year will go."

"I hope so, I hope so." She sighed as she clicked the silver clasp shut on the ratty old case she loved and hated simultaneously.


	13. Chapter 13 A brand New Year

"Its' only nine thirty Renesmee. Calm down!" laughed Edward. He looked over his shoulder at her as he drove towards the darkened horizon of the pacific north-west coast, towards La Push, towards Jacob. She sat in the back seat of his car her leg pulsing, her hands shaking._ Shit! I'm so nervous. Deep breaths. Calm thoughts. Be cool._

"Sorry, I know it's early. I'm just so…" Bella cut in, "Nervous? We hadn't noticed." She laughed as she rolled her eyes. "Relax Ren, he's going to be just as nervous as you are. You wouldn't believe how many times he phoned me just to check you're still coming."

"Really?"

"Yes. Really." Bella turned around in her seat to face Renesmee. "You don't have to be nervous. Be yourself, don't run away- again,"

"Unless it's running into a back room for some tonsil hockey of course." Interrupted Edward, earning him a light backhanded slap on the shoulder from Bella.

"Just be a friend and let the night happen. Enjoy yourself."

"Oh his friends! I hadn't even thought about his friends being there." She sat upright in her seat, her hands gripping either side of the seats in front. Her head poking between the gap. "What if his friends don't like me?" Edward was laughing in hysterics. "What's so funny?"

"You'll know when you meet Quill."

"That's whose place were going to, right?"

"Yeah" he answered, attempting to contain the laughter. "I'd place odds on Quill hitting on you before Midnight"

Bella turned to Edward, nodding with a broad smile across her face. "She'll be like fresh meat to those boys."

Renesmee pushed her face into her hands "Are you kidding me? Oh god. How awkward." She moaned.

"Oh Ren. I'm guessing you and Jake will be inseparable, so don't worry too much. Quills not so bad, once you get over his dirty mind. I'll make sure you meet Embry. He's Jakes closest friend. He'll love you just because you make Jacob happy. He's very sweet."

"Thanks guys. I'm glad you're gunna be there." An anxious thought entered her mind. "You two better not go anywhere either. Promise you'll stay till the count down."

Edward answered, a self-satisfied look across his face. "I promise, Bella and I will stay at the party for the rest of _this_ year. However, _next_ year, little bird, you're on your own. Time to leave the nest. Mamma and papa birdy need some alone time!" She pushed her fingers into her ears, "Too much information Edward. La, la, la, la, la."

They pulled into the street where the party was and parked across the road. The heavy base was pounding out the open doorway. Kids were moving in and out of the house on to the porch, some with cans of beer in their hands.

As the trio approached the house, Renesmee let Bella and Edward lead, hiding behind them. They weaved their way around the people dancing in the living room, they left their coats and bags in a bedroom and headed towards the kitchen in the rear of the house.

"Well! Where have you been all of my life?" came a voice from behind her as she felt an arm wind around her waist, the hand brushing over her behind. She squirmed to the side attempting to graciously pull her way out of the strangers grip. "Renesme, meet Quill. Quill, get your dirty paws of my friend." Bella chided as she reached in for a hug, effectively getting Renesmee out of his embrace. He shook Edwards hand as he eyed Renesmee up and down. "Hi, I'm Quill . Quill Atera." He puffed his chest out and gave her what she guessed was his version of 'bedroom eyes'. In spite of his wandering hands, she found the boy amusing and Ness help but mimic his stance, saying. "Hi, I'm Renesmee Mason… and haven't I been in heaven most most of your life, didn't I just fall from there or something?"

"Ouch, a body and a brain, I like her already." He smiled, winking at Bella while cocking his head to Renesmee. "You looking for Jake? I just saw him in here a few minutes ago. "He pointed to the front of the house. "The drinks are on the porch, feel free to have whatever you like. We got Leah Uley to get us some beer and even a few bottles of spirits for later. God that girl is cool!"

They made their way back round through the living area, weaving through clusters of people turning their bodies to the beat of the music, detouring to grab their jackets. As they approached the front door, Renesmee could hear a familiar laugh outside. Her heart skipped a beat and the quiet flutter of butterflies in her stomach took off into a fully-fledged migration of a Monarch. _Jacob! He's here! _She nearly pushed past Bella as they approached the door but held herself in check. Edward shot a glance over his shoulder at her, laughter in his eyes. "Calm Down. You look like you're gunna be sick all over the floor." She just glared at her friend's partner with an incredulous look, her cheeks flushing.

"Jake!" called Bella as she walked outside.

"Bells, you're here! I didn't see you come in." he reached down to hug her. Jake had been hovering outside in the cold of the porch waiting for _her_ to arrive.

"We just got here. Renesmee just had the pleasure of meeting Quill."

At the mention of her name, his eyes shot up looking behind his friend, searching for the face of the girl he had been thinking about non-stop for the past few weeks. Renesmee poked her head around the corner, her eyes honing in on his. As their eyes met, the nervousness and anxiety she had been feeling melted away, replaced instead with a grounding sense of completeness. Her soul recognised his.

Jacobs's eyes drank in her appearance. Her creamy skin, flawless against the dark of her jacket. Her hair falling in ringlets over the fury hood pushed behind her. He watch as her tense face transformed to sureness and serenity. She smiled at him. Her eyes lit by the happiness that shone from within her. He felt the connection to her, the pull she had. His soul recognised hers.

"Hey." he said, everyone else forgotten.

"Hey yourself." Renesmee bit into her inner cheek, stepping over the threshold closer to Jacob.

"I'm glad you came." He brushed his hand over her arm.

"I wish I'd been able to come earlier." She contrived, her voice soft in the cold night air.

"Well, you're here now, that's what counts." He was once again struck by how naturally beautiful she was, no heavy make-up, her glossy hair falling over her statuesque shoulders.

Jacob was snapped out of his trance by a tanned arm punching him in the shoulder. "Jackey boy. Where's the Vitamin R?"

"OH, hey Paul. In the red cooler, I think." He replied, forced back into reality. Jacob looked around him, remembering that Edward and Bella were still out on the porch with them. "Did you guys get a drink?" he asked as he walked over to the coolers opening the lid. "I don't think we need to shut the lids, it like 15° out here tonight. That should keep the drinks cold enough." He pulled out a soda handing it to Bella. He knew his friend too well to ask her. "What'd you like Edward?"

Edward replied, leaning over the box. "Let me see. I'll just have a Rainer." Jake took one more out for himself and turned to Renesmee "What about you Ness?"

"Um, no beer. I might just wait a bit. I'll have a sip of someone else's later." She immediately worried that it might be rude not to have a drink at a party. _He probably thinks I'm some square Nancy. _"On second thoughts, is there a cruiser or something in there?"

"Don't feel like you have to drink alcohol Renesmee. There's plenty of other stuff in here." He rummaged around the other box pulling out a bottle of orange juice. "What about this?"

"OK. Thanks." She smiled as he handed it to her, his fingers brushing along hers. He took a swig from his bottle as he watched her open hers and drink. Her lips moulding themselves to the rim as she tilted her head back. He eyed the movement over her throat as she swallowed down the liquid. _Who would have though dinking some juice could be so dam sexy? _

He cleared his throat trying to clear his head too. "Want to go for a walk?"

She smiled at him, she seemed shy and unsure of herself tonight. "That would be nice." She said chewing on her bottom lip nervously. "We should have talked weeks ago, I'm sorry." she gushed, her apology heavy in her green eyes. "Let me just get my bag." They left their drinks on the window sill as she ducked back into the house and quickly grabbed her satchel.

Bella stopped her before she could rush out the doorway, pulling her in to a light hug. "Have fun!" she sang into Renesmee's ear. Renesmee searched through her bag looking for her gloves. Then decided against it. She was hoping Jacob would hold her hand and she wanted to feel his skin on hers. She settled for her scarf as she wound it around her neckline, did up her jacket and lifted her hood.

"Are you warm enough?" asked Jacob as he took her by the hand to lead her down the street. His hand was warm on hers, he laced their fingers together as he drew circles on her palm with his thumb. The sensation tickled, her nerve endings heightened by his nearness. H_e's holding my hand! Maybe he _meant_ to put those x's in the message._"Plenty warm, thank you." She smiled. _You can keep ALL of me warm if I get cold anyway Jake. _She let out a little giggle to herself.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing." She replied, embarrassed by her outburst. Her heart was pounding so hard, she wondered if he could heart it. Suddenly remembering her Christmas gift she had for him. it was like it was burning a hole in her satchel as it pressed against her leg. Deciding it was a good way to start up a conversation, she jumped straight in with it. "How was your Christmas?"

"It was good," _all that was missing was you_ "One of my sisters are home for the holidays, so it was nice to not just be me and my dad."

"That would have been nice, is that the one who's at Washington State? We sometimes go there for track meets. But most of the winter events are in Seattle." They continued to walk on, hand in hand in silence. "Did you get any good stuff for Christmas?" she asked as she noticed the brown suede jacket he was wearing. "I helped Bella pick out that jacket." she rubbed her free arm down his.

"You did? That must be why I actually like it." He leaned in towards her, his hand up to his mouth to indicate a secret. "Don't tell her, but, let's just say she doesn't always get the most useful gifts."

She sniggered in understanding. "I know what you mean. I got an exercise DVD this year. I mean it's great, but I kind of have a pretty ramped up exercise program already. I have a coach that yells at me at training 4 times a week and I do weights and platies and running in between. I think I should be the one _in_ the DVD." He laughed at her candour, his belly shaking. He used the back of his hand to wipe a joyful tear away. She squeezed his hand as she shyly admitted, "I don't want to make you uncomfortable Jake, but, I got you something little for Christmas too."

He smiled, lighting up his entire face. "I did too. But I left it back at my place" He lifted his chin motioning down the long street. "It's only another block down, let's go there now."

They walked side by side, the air crisp in his lungs. The cloud cover was thin enough to allow the moon to cast an ethereal glow over the pair, illuminating the road. He wound his arm around her shoulder pulling her in under him. Their footsteps synchronised, tapping out a rhythm of their feelings. As they approached his house, he suddenly felt nervous once again. He was bring this girl home. _I can't remember if I left my room a mess. I hope it's not too embarrassing. At least the beds made. _He swallowed hard, his mouth dry. He released her shoulders and took back her hand as he motioned towards the little red house his mother and father had made into a home. "This is it. My dad's gone over to the Clearwater's with Charlie. And… I don't know where my sister is tonight?" The couple entered the dark house. Jacob dropped her hand as he moved quietly though the darkness. Renesme paused in the doorway removing her jacket as a lamp next to the couch switched on, illuminating the room.

The house was simply furnished with an earthy, natural feel. On the walls hung some paintings, traditional weavings and wood carvings. The mantle was scattered with photos in frames. Renesme made a mental note to herself to inspect the pictures before she left. The house was tidy and clean, yet still with a much lived-in feel to it. Jake took her by the hand as he led her through the hall past the dine-in kitchen. "This is my room," He paused before he opened the door. "Sorry if it's messy." He walked into his bedroom flicking on the light as she followed behind. It was a small room, the bed sat predominantly in the centre. Her eyes scanned across his private space, directly to her left was a desk littered with papers and a few dirty dishes. A wardrobe with draws spilling over with clothes sat along the right wall. The far wall had a window with navy blue curtains with a poster of Bruce Lee on one side and a Native American style painting of wolves howling on a snowy outcrop on the other. She entered the room and the door half swung shut behind her. Jake walked over to his bedside table, searching for her gift. "Sit if you want." He pointed to the bed. She unwound her bag from across her torso and placed it on the bed as she plopped down. "It's not messy at all." she assured, her eyes scanning around, landing on the print on the back of his door. She let out a laugh as she saw the cliché poster. "Nice! You're a tennis fan hey? What is it with guys and Anna Kournikova?"

He stood bolt upright and rushed over to the door, tearing the poster down. "I'm sorry. I can't believe you saw that."

"Jake don't worry! It's pretty normal. Even I have to admit, she does have an amazing body." She stood taking the rumpled paper from his hands. "Don't pull it down on my account." She smoothed out the creases and attempted to tack it back up on the door." Jake watched as she reached up, pressing the corners. The gracefulness of her long arms evident through the form fitting scoop necked long sleeve tee she wore. It was an emerald green shirt, Jacob though about how nice it looked against her skin and hair, he'd seen that green before, it was the same green as her eyes. He couldn't stop staring as her flat tummy and full breast as she stretched towards the door. Her backside was squeezed into a pair of black jeans. He appreciated her beauty as he sat down on to his bed. "What can I say? I like the athletic type." The hidden meaning in his words not concealed at all. She walked back to the bed sitting down next to him, oblivious to his overture. Their knees were touching. "Speaking of athletic. I want to give you your Christmas present."

She turned to shuffle through her bag handing him a humbly wrapped gift in brown paper with a gold ribbon around it. "Here," she whispered. "Merry Christmas, even if it is a week late." He carefully unwrapped the paper. Inside he found a gift card for a fuel station, a homemade CD and a grey sweat shirt with a big purple W and the words Washington across the front. "The weekend of the 14th I have an invitational meet in Seattle. I thought you might like to come up for the weekend. Watch me compete on the Friday night and the Saturday. Then we can spend Sunday together." She held up the gift card and noted a flash of heat in his eyes. "This is for gas to get you there. And this is for you to listen to on the way. So I can show you some of the music _I_ like." She shrugged opening and then closing the CD case. Next she held up the pullover against her chest "and this is for you to wear when you cheer us on. GO TEAM!" she mockingly punched the air. He laughed as he took the hoodie from her, removing his own jacket he pulled the sweater over his head. "It fits well. Thanks. Can I play the CD now?" he asked excited, reaching over to pick it up off the bed.

"No!" she cringed, "I'm too embarrassed. You might laugh at some of them, I have some pretty old-school tastes. I don't want to hear if you laugh." She burbled, combing her hands through her hair, twisting a curl around her fingers. "I loved all the songs you put on my CD by the way."

Jake looked at her perplexed. "What CD?"

Ness shook her head. "The classical CD you made me. Didn't you get Bella to leave it on my bed?"

Jacob was slowly shaking his head back and forth. "I have never made a burnt CD in my life." A cold shiver spread through her. "I wonder who did then. That's weird."

"Bella probably did put it there. Maybe Edward made it or something." He said, suggesting the obvious alternative. She nodded, agreeing. "Yeah. If anyone knows classical music it's the Piano Man Ed."

They sat in companionable silence, both lost in their own thoughts. Renesmee began thinking about the invitation she had just given him and started to worry. Was it was too forward? What was that look about? Did he even want to see her again? He seemed to be comfortable with her now, but she didn't want to presume. "So, you'll come to Seattle that weekend?" Jake looked over to her, a cheeky glint in his eye. He tucked his lips between his teeth trying to supress a smile. "What? She asked.

"That's a special weekend." He said, his tongue stretched to his back teeth, making his smile sexy as hell. "Do you know why?" She just looked at him with brows raised, she had no idea what he was talking about. "I don't know. It's the Seattle Indoor Invitational?" she guessed lamely. He laughed bouncing a little on the mattress edge, enjoying his little game. "No, I mean it's a special weekend for _me." _Ness just sat on the side of his bed, shaking her head in blankness. "That's my birthday!" he announced in a flourish.

"What? On the 14th?" she asked, he nodded, "Jake, I can't ask you to leave your family on your birthday. You can come another time. It's ok." She offered, wishing she'd known that little titbit of information in advance.

"What? No!" he said, his head shaking. "Of course I want to come. I'll expect cake though." he made a grunt as if he hated the look of his bedroom. "As if I'd stay here in sleepy hollow rather than see you in the _big city_." his smile broad, his eyes bright in the artificial light of his room.

"What type of cake do you like?"

"Chocolate."

"No. I can't do chocolate, I'm giving it up as motivation to do well this season."

"Really? Does that work?

"I don't know? Ive never done it before. Coach has us all doing it."

"Well then, in that case." He reached up and wound his fingers through her hair. The mood in the room shifting palpably. "How about that red velvet cake everyone talks about. I'd like to try that." She swallowed hard, her feeling of him touching her hair sent shivers over her. Man… she had it bad. "Red velvet. Leave it with me." She squeaked as he continued to feel the soft silk texture of her curls.

"Can I do something?" he asked, separating a long lock of her hair and leaning into her. He brought the ringlet to his nose and inhaling deeply. She watched as his chest expanded, filling himself with her fragrance. The gesture sent another warm little shiver through her. "What _is_ that smell?" he asked, as he brought his hand to her face, cupping her cheek with his fingers. "I haven't been able to get that smell out of my head for weeks. It's really nice." She looked into his eyes, her eyes darting back and forth between his. "It's probably the lavender Shampoo I use. My home town is famous for its lavender farms."

"I officially like lavender." He said as he leant in to kiss her on the lips.

His mouth moulded around hers as he pulled her in closer. She opened her mouth and kissed him back. Her arms draped over his wide shoulders as his hand wondered down her side settling into her waist. They sat siting side by side on his bed for several minutes, lips and tongues winding into one. They came up for air with arms intertwined. Their foreheads resting on each other's. She closed her eyes as she listened to his breathing, the small rumble in his chest sent shivers through her. She wanted to be with him so badly, but she needed to know if he really was free to return the affection. "Sorry to break the mood, but. I have to be sure." She looked up to him, the Question in her eyes.

He knew what she was asking nonetheless. "Renesmee, I told her it was over that day on the beach. I wish you'd waited for me to come back to the fire. She wasn't home that morning, I couldn't find her before then, I did it as soon as I saw her. I know what I might have looked like, but you have to believe me. There's no games. I'm not playing you. From now on it's just you and me. If.., if that's what you want." He added hesitantly.

She smiled, nodding. "Yeah, that's what I want." A flush of relief washed over both of them.

"So, can I call you my girlfriend now?"

She laughed at his forwardness, "Yes, if you want." she said shyly. "You can even put it on Facebook if you like.l" she mocked, though secretly thrilled.

"Can I give my_ girlfriend_ her Christmas present?" he asked as he turned away, reaching for the package behind him. It was wrapped in bright paper with little Christmas trees all over it. The tape haphazardly stuck across the seams. He gave the small bundle to her and she opened the paper and found two items, one a small wooden carving of a bird. "It's a robin" he explained as she felt the smoothness of the wood.

She brought it closer to her face and inspected the detail of the feathers, she turned it round in her hands and saw the initials 'J.B.' engraved on the underside. "You made this?" she asked surprised, tears welling in her eyes.

He nodded his assent. "Do you like it?" he asked, apprehension in his voice. He had spent the majority of this past week creating the little bird for her.

"Do I like it? Do I like it? Jake, I love it. You really made this yourself?" She couldn't stop looking at it. "This is amazing. You made me a Robin!" She held the little figurine in her hand, closing her fingers around it, bringing it to her chest. "Thank you. It's perfect."

"Don't forget the other thing" he said as he reached into the wrapping paper grabbing it out. "Here," he reached for her hand bring her arm to him as he tied a woven band around her wrist. She inspected the band. It was made of brown leather with red and cream threads woven with intricate patterns of chevrons and star burst. There was a smoothed creamy bead in the centre that she ran her hands over. "It's whale bone." He explained as she circled the bead with her finger and thumb.

"Did you make this too?" she asked incredulously.

He shrugged, attempting to down play his skills, "I caved the bone and did some of the weaving. I got my sister to help me with it. She's good at that stuff, my mum taught my sisters. I made a matching one for myself too." He added, as he pulled it out from behind him. He placed his band around his wrist resting his arm on her leg. She tied the chord into a tight knot, then took his hand in hers, holding up both their arms. She pressed her forearm to his so that the bands were aligned. "We match." he said. It seemed as though a very long woven cord was interlaced in a figure of eight pattern, binding them together.

"I like that." she countered. "I love my gifts. Thank you Jake." She kissed him sweetly, tucking her head in to the nook of his shoulder her arm winding around him.

"Merry Christmas Ness." They sat embraced in Jacobs bedroom until the clock in the lounge chimed, alerting them to the time. "Wow, it's already eleven, we'd better get back, we've missed most of the party." As they stood unfolding themselves from each other Jake pulled Renesme in by her waist. Their bodies pressing against one another and he kissed her again, hot and warm his mouth pressing down on her.

She moaned into his mouth as she felt the evidence of his excitement pressing into her hip. He angled his hips away from her creating a small space between. Ren ran her hands over the rolling muscles of his back and pulled his pelvis back in against her. "Another time," she whispered into his mouth as she then allowed the contact to be broken. He smiled, as he helped her into her jacket, his hands brushed over her neck as he lifted her hair of her shoulders.

"A guy could get used to this." He turned her around and did up the buttons on her front, the back of his knuckles brushing over her breasts through the material. She felt her skin scorch wherever he touched her even through the fabric.

"A girl could get used to this too."

They walked arm in arm back to the party, making idle chatter on the way. The night had turned decidedly colder, puffs of white smoke emanated from their heated breath. The smell of snow lingered in the air. Only quiet music could be heard from the house now, sounds of laughter and hollering was what was mostly heard. They stepped up onto the porch and Ness saw there discarded drinks on the sill where they had left them. "Do you think there's anything around that I can add in this?" she asked holding up her half empty juice bottle and handing him his can.

"Um?" he said looking around the table next to them, it was littered with bottles and cans. "Are you sure? Don't you have to be like, healthy or something? You don't have to drink you know." He said, a worried frown starting across his brow. She spotted an almost empty bottle of coconut rum and picked it up.

"This should taste good." she said to her self poring the clear liquid into the plastic bottle. "It's New Years Eve Jake, I have to let loose sometimes. Even if it is just once a year." she mollified, lifting her bottle up to his and clinking the plastic o the aluminium. "Cheers!" she said as she took a sip.

They entered the main living area of the house to find the group of teenagers sitting around the lounge, arms and legs hanging over the couch, couples sitting comfortably in each other arms. Shots of sprits were lined up on the coffee table. A pungent, herbal, sweet smell in the air. Jake saw Bella and Edward relaxing together in the loveseat and he pulled Renesmee along to sit at their feet.

"Hey Jake, you can get on this one too. I never, ever stole the vanilla essence from my mum's pantry to drink" said Quill. Exchanging a knowing look with his friend Jacob picked up one of the shot glasses and threw it back. So did Quill and also another native boy Renesme hadn't met yet. The trio laughing together. Jake leaned into Renesme's ear, point in to the boy she didn't know. "That's my best friend Embry. I'll introduce you guys properly later on."

"I've got a good one" called Bella, her voice slurred by the alcohol she'd already consumed. "I've never ever, ever, ever been caught making out in the back seat of a car." She lighted as she took two shots off the table handing one to Edward, clinking their glasses together and drinking, along with several other people in the room. Renesme's eyes perused the faces, the bile rising in her throat as she saw the familiar pretty face of Aponi sitting like a queen. Her feet resting on the boy she had met earlier, Paul. Their eyes met across the room and the look Aponi gave her sent a prickle over her spine. She glance over at Jacob, but he seemed to have not yet seen his former girlfriend. Renesmee took Jacobs beer and emptied what was left of it. A few more 'never ever's' went around as Renesme watched the girl. Aponi looked at Ness, a spiteful smirk developed on her face. She leaned in filling up all the now empty shot glasses. Her low cut top fell forward giving every one opposite, including Jake, her an eyeful of her perky tits.

She sat back down and shot a nasty look at Renesme. "I never ever, gave or got, a blow job in the back seat of a car." She looked straight at Jacob as she licked her tongue into the clear liquid. "Or the front seat." there was drunken laughter as several of the boys and a few of the girls drank. Renesme look up at Jacob to see him glaring at Aponi with what could almost be described as hatred. His teeth were working, the muscles in his jaw undulating up and down. "What Jakie, you're not gunna drink to that, I know I did." The double meaning not lost in Renesme. "What? Your new little grille's not worldly enough for this game, she hasn't had a single drink yet."

"Fuck off Aponi, who invited you anyway." He spat at her. He leaned into Renesme puling her closer to him. "Sorry you had to hear that, it's not true - for the record. She's been giving me a hard time ever since I broke up with her and I think now she's seen me with you, she's gunna ramp it up a notch."

"Don't worry, two can play at that game, just I won't play dirty… much." She replied, looking up at him through her lashes. Raising her voice so to be heard Renesme chimed in. "I've got a few. Um, I've never ever been in a cat fight." She lifter her class as if the cheer Aponi and drank. Jake sniggered under his breath giving her a slight pat on the backside. "I've never ever been in a fight were I've broken someone's nose." She threw back another shot. "Or jaw." She added as she threw back a third one. The threat of violence thinly veiled. Renesmee could feel the effect of the vodka as it burned her throat and settled into her empty stomach. It worked quickly, giving her the mettle to continue her little verbal rampage. _I how dare she talk to Jake like that. He's mine bitch. Get it. You have no idea what my life has been like. Don't you dare think you can tempt him away with your tiny boobs either._

She put her hand up interrupting the next person. She glared at Aponi, her head buzzing. "I never ever had to go to hospital for a heroin overdose." She drank again… adding "at the age of ten," her fingers spastic as she attempted some type of gangster symbol. Bella leaned over her chair reaching down to place a hand on Renesme's shoulder. "Red Robin," she hushed, "that's enough." Renesmee shook off the hand, she was annoyed and she wanted to vent her anger at the audacious girl. Renesmee was always so tightly wound, so controlled that, as soon as the tension was released from the rubber band of her alter ego, it recoiled back with a sharp sting. By now, everyone in the room was aware of the play between the two girls. People were looking down, not wanting to make eye contact, the uncomfortable tension was palpable. Aponi continued to look at Renesmee with as if she wasn't worthy of breathing the same air as her. Inside, Renesmee didn't really think she was either.

Ness lined up three more shots in front of her. "I never ever had a drug dealer as a dad." She drank. "Or, how about… I never ever had a drug addict as a mum." She shook her head tipping back another vodka. "Even better, a dad who was beaten to death while in jail for dealing drugs." Renesmee kneeled over to the low table, her hands behind her back as she placed her mouth around the shot glass. She lifted it only with her lips, tipping the liquid down her throat.

Jacob was astonished to hear Renesmee's outburst, she had always been so reserved and quiet. Jacob took the glass from her mouth. "Ness, stop." He stood up, pulling her up with him. "Come on babe." He prompted as he led her away from the circle through to the kitchen. "What was that about?" he asked, an concerned yet exasperated tone in his voice. "That was full on. I thought you didn't tell people about you childhood?"

She sat up on to the counter, her face in her hands, her head was swimming, she couldn't think straight. Remorse and humiliation washing over her. "Oh, I don't" she cried. "I've made such a fucking fool of myself. Stupid insecurities" she looked up at Jacob. He was searching in the cupboard for a glass, he filled it with water and handed it to Renesmee. She took a sip and felt her stoma churn. "Oh Jake, I feel sick." She hopped down off the bench, stumbling.

Jacob held her firmly by the waist as he directed her to the bathroom just as she emptied the content of her stomach in to the bowl. "It's better you're getting it out. You just had seven hard shots in less than twenty minutes, you know?" He held her hair back as she continued to retch. When she was done, she crawled over to the basin and washed her face. She used her finger and some toothpaste to Clayton's brush her teeth. She slid down the vanity, her backside smacking on the floor. "Better?" he asked scooting over to sit next to her on the cool tiles.

"A little. It might take some time for my pride and reputation to recover though." She moaned, recalling all that she had said. "I don't know what got in to me?"

"Aponi, she brings out the worst in people. And seven vodkas will make the most hardened alcoholics a little mouthy." They both laughed at his attempt to lighten the situation.

She leaned her head on his shoulder as he rubbed her arm. "Some first date hey?" she added rhetorically.

They sat in the bathroom as they heard the partiers begin the count down for the New Year. As the calls and cheers ran out through the night, Jacob and Renesmee shared a quiet kiss. "Happy new year" he said. "Bonne Annèe. I think this year is defiantly going to be a good one." She reflected leaning in for a longer more passionate kiss.

"With you Ness, every day is going to be better that the next." They rubbed noses and then he kissed her with lust and desire, pouring his soul into the embrace.

They were abruptly interrupted by a knock at the door. "Come on you love birds." Came a call from the half ajar door. "I think you've had enough public displays for one night." Embry stuck his head through the door. "Hey, that was some speech you gave back there. Remind me to never piss _you_ off, eh?" Renesmee felt her cheeks burn with mortification. Jake stood up and waked to the door shaking his friends hand.

"Happy new year you horses ass. I want you to meet Renesmee. Properly."

"Hi," she waved as she used the toilet to hoist herself to standing. Still swaying on her feet she grabbed at Jacob for support. "I'm so sorry about all that." she motioned to the main room. "I really don't normally drink. And I'm definably not that much of a bitch. I'm so embarrassed. What a first impression to make."

"Don't worry about it. It was good to see Aponi get beaten at her own game for once." He turned to look at Jake, "Will you get out of here though, I dying for a piss."

"Alright, alright. We're going." The couple made their way back out. The crowd was clearing a space around the lounges making the dance floor larger. The music was up now. Throngs of people were bouncing to the techno beat of Avichii. Couples were hidden in the dark corners making out.

Ness was scanning the room; half of her was looking for Jakes ex in order to finish what she'd started, the other, the more dominant ,sober side was hoping to avoid a confrontation with Aopni altoghter. s=She'd neither have bothered, Api was no where in sight.

Renesmee saw Edward helping Bella with her coat as she approached them. "You guys leaving?" she asked. Bella turned to her friend. "Are you alright? You really shouldn't drink so much alcohol Ren." She held her friend by the shoulders looking her straight. "I never knew you had drugs. I thought you hated the stuff?" Jacob came to Renesmee's side folding a protective arm around her.

"It wasn't on purpose Bella. If you heard, I was ten. I had seen my parents using enough times. I _ate_ the stuff. It was foul. Thankfully, I had made my way outside the house before I collapsed, otherwise, I doubt anyone would have found me. My mother was too _high_ to have noticed." A bitterness entered her voice. She looked down at the scuff marks on her worn boots. They were her favourites. "That was the last time I saw mum actually. I went to live with Grand-mere Sophie after that. Mum died only a few months later... So yeah, I do hate the stuff." She ran her fingers through her hair, ruffling it up. "Agh, I don't want to talk about this now."

"Ok. If you want to come home with us we're leaving now." Bella said. Renesmee felt Jacobs's warm strong arm holding her close.

She leaned into his support, turning to him she asked. "Can I crash with you tonight?"

He wound his other arm around her. Her head sinking into his chest. "Of course. You want to go home now?" she nodded her affirmative as she pressed her palms into his abs.

"Ok." Bella broke in, kissing them both on the cheek. "Happy new year. See you tomorrow" she smiled as she left.

Renesmee and Jacob walked back to the Black house along the freezing, deserted streets of La Push. The snow that had threatened earlier began to lightly tumble down around them. The wind was quiet but the cold was still gripping, the couple drawing closer for warmth. Renesme staggered while Jacob half carried her. As they entered the warmth of the house, the smell of home enveloped the girl. She was tired, so tired. Tired from the long day. Tired from the effects of the alcohol and the cold. Tired of struggling with her inner-demons. Tired of being alone.

Even in her intoxicated state she wondered if Jacob expected more from her as they entered his room. She sat down onto his soft bed and began to unzip her boots. She removed her socks and began to massage the warmth back into them. Jacob rummaged in his draws pulling out a t-shirt and cotton boxer shorts. He brought them up to his nose, smelling them. "They're clean if you want to wear them." he offered as he passed the bundle to her. "I'll let you get changed. I'll be back in a minute." He said as he exited, closing the door behind him. She shed her clothes, leaving them on the floor where they fell and threw on Jacobs's shirt and shorts. The room was spinning and she had to brace her legs on the end of the bed to stop from falling over. She caught her reflection in his wardrobe mirror, her mascara had run and her hair was frizzing from the melted snow, Jakes clothes swam on her, she rolled the sleeves up and crawled into the bed. There was a soft knock on the door "You decent?"

"Yeah." she called back. He entered balancing two big glasses of water and an Aspirin in his hand. He walked around to the other side of the bed, placing the glasses on the side table. The other glass he held out to her.

"My sisters always swear-by Aspirin before you go to bed. I don't know if it works, but it can't hurt." She took the tablet and glass from him. She threw the tablet into her mouth and greedily drank the cool fresh water down. He pointed to the second glass, "This is if you wake up thirsty in the night."

He crawled over her to search under the other pillow, reaching behind the bed he pulled out a white t-shirt. He sat on the edge of the mattress and pulled his shirt off from the back the way men do. Renesmee couldn't help but stare at his sculpted muscles. They were the muscles of everyday hard work, not manufactured in a gym. He pulled his long jet black hair out from its tie as it sat across his broad shoulders. She sat up and crawled over to him kneeling on the bed she pressed her body against his back. She scooped his hair away and kissed him behind the ear. He half turned and ran his hand up her thigh. She leaned over him from behind and ran her hands over his biceps and down his chest. "Do you realise how fucking beautiful you are?" she purred, a huskiness in her throat. "Can I show you?" She hummed, she ran her tongue over her dry lips. He pulled her around so she was sitting in his lap. He kissed her deeply tasting the alcohol still on her breath. She responded by running her hands through his hair, her hips were rolling, her backside pressing into his crouch.

Jacob broke the kiss. "You are an amazing woman. Do you know that?" he continued not waiting for a reply. He half carried her to the pillow, "But you are amazingly drunk, and I won't let you do something you might regret in the morning." and he pulled the covers over them both. "Let's just sleep."

In a deep, back corner of her mind, the part that was still sober, she felt the immediate relief of his refusal. She knew she wasn't quite ready to take her fledgling relationship with Jake to that level yet. And when she did, she wanted to be able to remember it the next day. She snuggled up to him, running her smooth leg up and down his. Her fingers drifting up and down his abs. "Yeah, you want to sleep with me alright!" she seized her drifting hand as it hovered at his waistband.

"Ness." he warned, his voice deep.

"I know, I know. I'm just teasing" she giggle in a silly way. "I like this anyway." She rested her head on that delicious hollow where his chest met his arms. Her hand fanned across his chest, her fingers skimming long his collarbone.

He wound his arm around her and kissed the top of her head. "Night my little birdy."

"Goodnight Jake. Happy new year." She closed her eyes, marvelling at the feel of his muscles under her hands. It was only minutes later that Jacob heard Renesme's breath relax into the regular flow of slumber. He allowed himself to run his hand along her side. He felt the curve of her hips and the dip of her waist. His hand slowly slipped upwards and he stroked the swell of the side of her breast. He resisted the urge to reach his hand around to feel the fullness of her in his hand. Instead, his hand brushed over the softness of her cheek. He closed his eyes and drifted into a sleep submerged with dreams of a beautiful woman who transformed into a bird, soaring on the thermals of a mountain.

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**Finally! They're together. It's a slow start. But things ****_will_**** heat up. (Eventually) Thank you for all the great reviews. They really do make my day... and they keep me motivated to keep on writing and posting new chapters.**

**I hope this clears up some more of Nessie's issues too! I know some of you were trying to figure her out.**

**I thought Id better add ****I don't condone under age drinking****. Just remember that here in Australia, the drinking age is 18. So it's perfectly legal (and very common) to consume alcohol at a NYE partly! Just never in excess and not in response to a boyfriends slutty ex. ha :-)**

**Cheers M**


	14. Chapter 14 First impressions

**This is just a little half chapter- its kind of like a consolidation of the previous one. But it didn't really belong in the bedroom so it gets its own update.**

** It might tide you over for a few days while I struggle with my broken home internet. Cheers!**

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Renesmee woke the next morning feeling like she had a mouthful of desert sand. Her head ached and so too did her stomach. She opened her eyes to the light that was filtering in through the frosted window. Her gaze drifted to the night stand where the large glass of water sat. She felt Jacobs's warm, strong arm encompassing her. She was using his other arm as a pillow. The memory of that same scenario, all those weeks back in her dorm room, flashed into her mind. A delicate smile crept onto her features. No startled wake up onto the cold floor this time. In his arms is where she belonged.

Ren loathed to move away from him, but the appeal of the crystal liquid was strong. She slinked over to the side of the bed, propping herself up on one elbow and drank greedily.

"Drunk it all and left no friendly drop for me?" chuckled his voice from behind her. His arm winding around her as he shifted closer. She could feel his chest pressing into her back, his warm breath against her neck. "Good morning beautiful." he blew into her ear. She smiled, tilting her head back enjoying the sensation as he softly kissed down her neck and over her collar bone. His feathery light kiss igniting her from within. "Morning to you too." She tuned so that her mouth could meet his. Landing them softly into his. The turning movement however, was enough to send a wave of queasiness through her, her head spinning. "Agh!" she groaned, levering herself to sit on the side of the bed. "I feel like shit!" she whimpered as she leaned her elbows on her thighs and pressed her face into her palms. He rubbed comforting circles on her back.

"You want some coffee?" he moved to head to the kitchen, pulling on a t-shirt as he went.

"Hang on," she called quietly. "I'll come with you. Do you think you have some juice?" she stood and rubbed her thumb and for finger on her temples. "And another Aspirin."

The couple sat side-by-side, around the small table, their fingers intertwined, and Renesmee's legs resting on Jakes as he ran his free hand up and down her calves. They were broken from their private world when Billy wheeled himself into the kitchen. "Renesmee!" he gleamed, a grin flashing across his weathered and astute face. Father and son shared a look that Renesme pretended she had missed. "Happy new year Billy."

"Jake mentioned you'd be staying with Bella over the break. It's nice to see you again."

"Thank you, did you have a nice Christmas?"

"It was very good, thank you, especially with Rachael home."

All faces turned to the hall way as a loud voice called from the bathroom. "That's right old man, I make all family events better. You both know you've been wasting away in this bachelor pad."

A beautiful Indian princess shuffled out to the kitchen, flannel PJ's with little flowers on them. Her hair cut in asymmetric hewed lengths, hung over her shoulders. Her skin was the same russet tan as Jakes. Their similarities unmistakable, only distinguished by the feminine line of her jaw and nose, her shaped, high arched brow and the full pink pout of her lips.

She walked past her brother shoving him as she made a B-line to the coffee. "Aren't you going to introduce me Jake?" she turned clutching her mug as she sat at the table. Her leg folded under her, she sipped on her brew, a cheeky glint in her eye. "I feel like I know you so well. Jake never stopped prattling on about your visit all week." Jake cringed willing his sister to shut up. "And we all got an in-depth family history last night at Quill's." Renesmee's heart dropped. Her jaw ajar as her face burned a crimson heat.

Anger rose in Jacob. "Rachel!" he yelled "Why would that be the first this you say to her this morning? You think it wasn't fucking embarrassing enough for Renesmee?" his arm gesturing to Renesmee.

"Language Jacob!" Billy chided.

"Sorry dad. But Aponi was a real bitch at the party and Renesmee had a bit too much to drink and… well… s-some things were… said." He stumbled his words, not wanting to compound the problem.

" Chill Jacobina, it was hilarious!" Rachael laughed. She cut her self-off short, suddenly turning to Renesmee, her hand out front gesturing in a palm-up apology. "Not your shitty childhood." She clarified. "I mean that slut Aponi's face." She rolled her eyes to the celling tilting her head back. "That girl has needed a bitch slap for quite some time. Did you see her all over Paul? I mean, _we_ were sitting on the couch, getting to know each other better, and she squirmed her way over and practically lies all over him." Jealous distaste oozing from her. "After you said… all that stuff, she and her stupid possie sulked off onto the porch. I don't even know if they stayed for the countdown. It was awesome!"

Renesme rested her elbow on the table and hid her eyes under her hand. "It was embarrassing, that's what it was."

Jacob embraced Renesmee rubbing up and down her arm. "Don't worry about it Ness, I'm sure most of the guys were too drunk to remember it anyway." She looked up at him, scepticism etched across her face. "Well they better not say anything about it to you, or they'll cop it." he ruffled. "You too Rach." He pointed a warning finger at his sibling.

"By the way, Renesmee, this is my big mouth, big sister Rachel." The two girls met eyes across the table laughing at Jacobs's protectiveness. "Hi" Ren responded tucking a stray curl behind her ear, she had a vague recollection of seeing the Beautiful girl at the party but Ness was only glaring at one other girl last night and it hadn't been Jacobs sister.

Rachel nodded in reply, turning to Jake, a sly smirk on her face. "So you two finally a thing? Bella said you haven't stopped pining over her for months."

Jake threw a napkin at her. "Shut it, bobble head." He tuned to look are Renesmee. "Yes, I guess were a_ thing_. At least, it will be as soon as I update my Facebook status." Renesmee laughed at their private joke. Rachael smiled, tapping Renesme on her hand. "Welcome to the family sis!"

Jake and Renesmee spent the next six days together. Only separating at night whenRenesmee would regretfully say goodnight as he dropped her back at the Swan's home. They spent the days searching the local Junk yards for a car's that Jake could fix up for her. She had asked for his help in finding her a reliable car to buy. Jacob had insisted on him making it a project for him to piece back together a car for her. She would pay for the shell and other parts, and he would do the re-build as a gift. She tried to get him to accept some form of payment for labour and time but Jake wasn't having any of it. They settled on a aqua blue/green 1963 Ford Falcon. Jake was excited to start working on it straight away.

They spend days in his garage, her lying on the tattered couch, him, bent over into the engine bay. Some days, not much work was done on the car, she would be lying on the couch and he would be draped across her. Their bodies pressed together as they shared passionate kisses, tongues intertwined. Desperate to share time with one another, the unspoken heart break of Renesme's departure looming over them.

On her last day on La Push the two were lying in Jakes room. Side by side on his bed string at the celling. Heads and hands touching. "I wish I didn't have to go." She sighed. "Your dad won't mind if you drive up on your birthday to watch the invitational?" she asked.

"Of course. I wouldn't miss it. I can't wait to see you in those tiny outfits you track girls wear." She lovingly slapped his hand. "It's freezing out there Jake, even in an indoor stadium we still have long leg-ins on."

"Well, it'll still be good to see you run. And to just _see_ you." He exhaled, squeezing her hand he brought it up to his lips, kissing the soft skin on the back of her hand. "It's going to be long two weeks."

"I know." she agreed. They rolled and the duo lay face to face gazing into each other souls for several minutes until Jake suddenly turned, kneeling over her, bouncing on the bed like a puppy. "Oh, I forgot to tell you what my surprise was." She turned towards him so that she was lying under him. Their bodies only inches apart. His breath warm on her lips.

"That's right! I forgot. What is it? Let me guess. Your madly in love with me and can't live without me." She teased. He looked into her eyes with the love he knew they shared but hadn't yet said out loud.

"No. Well, of course that's true, but that's no surprise. I'd been thinking about something you said to me. That night you tortured me with running the stairs." she laughed at the memory, "You said something like, 'if you want something you have to go and get it, you can't let life pass you by' and it got me thinking. What do I want to do? You know? I can't just bum around and live off my dad forever. Then it hit me, I need to fix cars. That's what I love. So I've enrolled in an automotive tech course, at Shoreline community college in Seattle." He sat back on her thighs as she sat up, excited. "Really Jake! That's great! We'll be studying in the same city! Wait. Where are you going to live?"

"Seattle." He smiled, his eyes gleaming with the knowledge. "Before Christmas, Rachel was telling us all about this amazing Internship she wants to get with this big I.T. Company just out side of Seattle. She finishes college in June and she's want to get a place there to live. We're gunna get a place together." He smiled, shrugging. Attempting to down play the significance this news had. She screamed, kneeling upright forcing him to fall back on the mattress. "You're really moving to Seattle?" He happily nodded his accord. "Not until June or even July though." She simply smiled, her face lit up. He looked into her eyes relishing the joy that radiated from within them. He sat up next to her, his hands steady on her hips. "You're moving to Seattle!" she cried as her lips crashed down on his.


	15. Chapter 15 Eight point two seconds

** So, things are heating up a bit between our two lovebirds. Be for warned, there is a Lemon towards the end of this chapter.**

**There are also a few lines of French and French Créole. I'll put the translations at the end. **

**Thankyou to my sister/cuz Mar for her French proof reading. And I am so sorry if there are any Creole speaking folks reading this and I have completely butchered your language. It's pretty hard to find a French creole speaker in my little Australian city. So Google translate was the best I could do!**

**Lets watch Ness do her thing shall we!**

* * *

Renesmee and Bella returned to start the Spring Term. Ness had a new lease on life. She trained for the upcoming meet every spare minute she had. She counted down the days until Jake's visit.

Three weeks after New Year, Jake made the drive to Seattle to see his girlfriend. Donned on his new favourite sweater, he arrived at the university campus as the sun was setting and made his way to the indoor track. Renesme had emailed him a map with detailed instructions. She didn't want him getting lost again and risk some other girl crashing into him. By the time he entered the building the meet was already underway. He snaked his way through the crowd to the front of the stand. Looking over the groups of athletes' stretching and warming up, he saw the familiar glint of fire in the hair he loved so much. He watched as she sat stretching in her track suit. Other athletes coming and going, many stopping to talk briefly. Jake felt the sting of envy as he saw the packs of males who approached her, stoping to talk. Many resting their hands on her shoulder or back.

Jake saw how beautiful she looked, her sincerity and goodness combined with her physical beauty making her so desirable. _That's my girlfriend. _ _Hands off. _He smiled as he saw how she expertly dodged the hands. She stood removing her jacket and sweat pants, revealing the formfitting university tank top and skin tight black lyrca beneath. She gathered up her belongings, stuffing them into her bag, she made her way over to the area near the start line.

Jake waved his arms in big circles attempting to get her attention. Her eyes fond him, her face lifting to a giant smile as she ran over to him at the fence. "Jake, you're here!" she squealed as she neared.

"I'm here!" he called as he reached over the rail. She dropped her bag and wrapped her arms around his neck. Their lips met in a hungry kiss, both staving for each other "Happy Birthday." She smiled as she continued to kiss him. His hands ran along her back and cupped down to her bottom. "Thank you. Is this my present?" he asked as he squeezed her backside. She giggled into his mouth, "Stop that. Do you know how many people are watching us?" He spanked her lightly on the ass. "I'm counting on it." He smirked. "I'm making sure these young pups know what's mine." His head gesturing to the group of sprinters gawking at them. She chortled, "Righty-o, enough marking your territory. I've got to get my spikes on, my heat's in 15 minutes."

She lowered herself onto the ground as she rummaged through her training bag. Her hands stopped, frozen inside the bag. Her head tilted to the side. "This is starting to freak me out now." She mumbled to herself. "What?" he asked "What's wrong?" She continued to search her bag, pulling most of the contents out. "This." She held up a Fluorescent-yellow plastic key. "This isn't mine. I have one like this but the thread broke the other day. I meant to get a new on one, but I never did. But look, there's one in here now." She looked up to Jake with worried eyes, "I keep getting… stuff. Like that CD! I asked Bella, she had nothing to do with it. How did it end up on my pillow? My pillow Jake!" She sat with her arms resting on her knees, her head bowed in worry.

"Ness, you have to race now. Don't worry about it right this instant. We'll deal with it after. Ok. I promise, we'll deal with it." She swiftly pulled on her spiked racing shoes. "Ok, I got to focus." She said as he stood up, then suddenly, she shook her body, her arms and hands flicking as if to rid herself of her fears. She chucked all her things back into the bag, zipping it up. "Will you look after this for me?" she asked as she heft it over the railing. He caught it easily and place it on the floor beneath him.

She stood up on to her tippy toes and reached up to kiss him. "You gunna watch me run?" she asked, somehow making the question seductive.

"Babe, I can't take my eyes off you. I'll be watching, you can guarantee that." She unwound herself from him and stepped back a few.

"I have to go and marshal." She pointed up towards the finishing line. "If you wait about twenty feet from the end you should still get a good view of the whole race and the finish."

Jake called as she backed away. "Ok, I'll see you down the end. Good luck." She blew him a kiss as she turned and made her way to her competitors.

He watched as the girls all ran the hurdles in the first two heats, Renesmee's heat was third. He watched as she set up her starting blocks and ran a warm up through the first hurdle. She turned and set it back up, making her way back to wait for the start. He could see her searching the crowd for him, he waved to catch her eye and she blew him an other kiss. Soon, Jake could hear the whistle blow and the seven girls lined up. Behind his shoulder he could hear two older men talking.

"Lane four John, the red head. She's been training really well, she should time under 8.3. I've started to get her to focus her training. No more long jump or sprints." Jakes ears were concentrated on the conversation, he guessed the man talking was Renesmee's coach. He quietly turned to look. A tall man in his fifties stood behind Jake. He sported a greying moustache and buzz cut, under his University of Washing polo was the remanets of what was once, a sporting physique. The other man was younger, tanned, he was wearing a dress shirt and tie. He looked important. "Does she train well?" Jake prickled at the way he spoke about Ness like she was a race horse. "Yeah, she keeps to herself, no boys, no parties, and good with her studies too. She's an orphan so no overbearing parents either." It sounded like they were negotiating her trade or something. _I didn't know they traded track and field the same as NFL?_ "If she performs tomorrow. I'll come and see how she goes on the MPSF's and then we'll talk."

Their attention was turned back to the race as they set on to their blocks. The starting gun went and Jake jumped not expecting the echo the indoor stadium provided. He watched with pride as Ness sprinted to the first hurdle, her leg stretched out in front of her as she flew over it, her foot snapping down so very fast, as she transitioned into the next run. Renesme pulled in front, by the last hurdle she was almost full set in front, she allowed herself to pull up slightly before the line, winning comfortable. It was all over in less than ten seconds.

Jake made his way to the gate past the finish line as Renesme stood, hands on hips catching her breath. She was staring up at the giant screen waiting for her time. After an eternal two minutes the names and times flashed on the screen. 1) Renesmee Masen – Washington - 8.20. Jake had no Idea what if that was good, but hey, she'd won, so it had to be alright? Didn't it? He turned to watch as her mouth fell open, her hand covering her open lips. A look of disbelief washed across her face followed by such a joyous smile Jacob couldn't help by smile along. She turned seeking out Jake but was stopped by the man in the suit and her coach. She wrapped her arms around her coach as he paternally embraced her back. Jake could see introduction were being made and Ness shaking the suited man's hand before she ran over to the gate. "Eight twenty! Jake I can't believe I did that in a heat." She was jumping on the spot.

"So, I take it that's a good time?"

"Yes. Yes, it's totally a personal best. But more importantly it's totally on track for an awesome time on the _outdoor_ 100 hurdle. Like, good enough for the Pac 12's, even the NCAA's." She bit her lips, attempting to hold in her exuberance. Jake was shocked, he knew she was good, but he hadn't realised _how_ good. "So, are you headed to the Olympics next?" She looked up at him shaking her head, gushing, "No. That was just a heat, I have to do it again for the final tomorrow. And keep improving more over the session. There is a really big meet here next month, which will be a really important qualifier." She closed her eyes and breathed deeply. "I have to calm down. I'm getting way ahead of myself, I just have to train for the Husky classic and the MPSF's". Then I can think about what's next." Jake opened the gate and as she stepped through he pulled her in closer pressing her to his chest. His hands coiling around the long braid she wore down her back.

They were interrupted by a stranger's voice, rolling with a Louisiana accent, he approached from behind Jake, a second tier of stadium seats and a railing separating them. "Nice run Renesmee." Ness jerked her head up as Jake half turned to look behind him. She squirmed underneath the strangers gaze as his eyes raked overtly up and down her body. "Thanks Laurent." _So… _not_ a stranger then? _Jacob appraised the guy talking to his girlfriend. He was tall. Not as tall as him, but still tall. His shoulders were broad against the Huskies jersey he wore. A class ring decorating his left little finger. His dark skin highlighting his bright teeth. His hair in short, two inch dreads. _Great a football jock. How many guys does she know?_

"Mwen kwè ou pa dat?" he asked._ Great he speaks French too! _ Jake felt there was a hint of accusation in his tone even though he had no idea what he was saying. His insecurities forgotten as he kicked into 'protective boyfriend' mode.

"Je ne l'ai pas, mais maintenant je le fais." The set of her shoulders and the defensive tone in her voice assured Jake he was right in his assumption. This was not a pleasant conversation for her.

"Petèt ou bezwen yon ti jan nan creloe nan ou ak natif natal melanj la ?" She huffed at his comment. She was annoyed. Angry even. "Va te faire foutre Laurent!" She spat her words at him. Switching into English she added. "Don't you know it's rude to talk in another language in front of someone?" Distain rolling off her.

He shrugged, full of cocky self-assurance. "I wanted to have a private conversation with you."

"Well, you got one. So, now you can leave." Her eyes widening in a threat. Her hand flipping the air as if to flick a pesky fly away.

"Yeah, I'm done. I only came to see you with your legs apart anyway." He smirked as he turned away back to the exit. Shock forced a gush of air out of her mouth, incredulity silencing her.

Jake however was fuming. "Hey! LaDick! Don't talk to my girlfriend like that!" Jake made to climb up over the diving rail towards Laurent. His fits balled up, his right arm back ready to punch. Renesmee placed a restraining hand on his arm. "Don't Jake. His a jerk. Just let him go."

"But..." Jake glared at Laurent as he turned around, walking out of the stands. He wanted to knock that smart ass grin right of La Cocks face.

"Please. I hate violence -when I'm sober. I get you want to thump his head in. I do. But, I'm used to it. You think I don't know half the football team only watch us to see us girls in our two piece? It's disgusting. But, it is, what it is." She heaved a sigh. "Laurent has taken a certain… Attachement français to me lately nonetheless."

Jake relaxed his arms turning back around to Ness. "Is that why he likes you? Cause he can speak French to you?"

"Maybe. I don't know. And he doesn't speak _French. I_ speak French." She stated with an air of pride. "_He_ speaks dirty French-Creole." Her distaste obvious. She waved her arm in dismissal. "Who cares about him anyway? You came to Seattle to visit me_._ So, eyes on _me_." She ordered as she came up on to her tippy toes, looking into Jakes eyes and puckering up for a quick peck. Satisfied his attention was firmly back to her she giggled, linking her hand with his. "La Dick. That was a good one. I think I'll use it next time he tries to use me as a commodity to be owned or something."

"Speaking of commodities, I think your coach was trying to sell you off to that other guy."

She looked curiously over her shoulder. "That guy, is my meal ticket." She explained, sitting down to take off her special shoes. "He's a sponsorship scout for Nike. If I can do well this season I might get sponsored. They pay for your gear, your shoes, they even help with transport cost to the different meets all across the west coast. He is a very important person to impress." Her mood lifted. The unpleasant exchange forgotten.

"Well, you certainly impressed me little Red."

"Tonight, I impressed myself." She boasted as she stood pulling on her track pants and kissed her gorgeous First Nations boyfriend.

Life was going exceptionally well for Renesmee Masen.

- o ~ O * O ~ o -

Jake and Ness shared a quiet meal together in the Rec room of Ness and Bella's dorm building. The couple lounged together on beanbags on the floor. Chatting as the TV hummed quietly in the background. He was playing with her hair, raking it through his fingers as she leaned back against his chest. "I didn't tell you. I got that job at Eagle garage. Just Mondays and Tuesdays. I'm sure all I'll be doing is answering phones and sorting out parts. But it'll help pay the bills and it should be good experience. I start on Monday."

She listened as she felt the rumble of his chest as it vibrated when he spoke. "Well done babe." She leaned her head back as her arms reached behind her, pulling his head down for a kiss. If this is what love was? Then she was hooked.

Renesmee wanted to turn in early, so they made their way up to the dorm. "I haven't given you your birthday present yet" she said as they walked hand in hand up the stairs. Jake squeezed her hand, "You didn't have to get me anything Ness. Being here with you is all I want anyway." She nudged against him as he leaned in and kissed her temple. "Well, I got you something anyway."

As he followed her into her room she was suddenly overcome with apprehension. _Is he expecting his present to be sex? Am I ready to have sex? Yes. But I really need to be fit for tomorrow. What if it hurts still tomorrow? We have to wait. I have to ask him. Explain it to him. _Nervous now, she hurried to her desk, picking up the wrapped package that sat there. He stood by the door way as she walked back over to him handing it to him with arms outstretched keeping a protective distance between them. "Happy birthday Jacob." She said shyly, kissing him innocently on the cheek then stepping back into her blockade.

He roughly opened the package, tearing the tissue paper from the corners, uncovering a photo frame. Jacob inspected the gift, it was made from a dark cedar wood, the lines polished to a smooth finish. Inside was a photo of him and Renesme, sitting on the couch at Charlies house. He was sitting on the cushions and she was on the back rest, up behind him with her knees either side of his shoulders as she braided his hair. Jake remembered Bella taking that photo, he was mortified, worried that his mates would get hold of the picture and tease him mercifully about letting the girls _do _his hair.

Now seeing it, he felt differently. Seeing her hands as they combed through his hair, the look of love in her eyes as she looked down to him. In the picture he was half looking over his shoulder at her, their gazes were converging. Both of them wearing brilliant, teeth revealing, shining smiles. It was a photo of two people in love. _I love her._

"This is such a great photo Ness." He said stepping towards her. "I'll put it on my bedside table at home. Thank you." He reached up to her chin, his fingers lifting it up as he pressed his lips into hers. She let herself get lost in his embrace, then remembering her nervousness and her promise of cake, she broke away.

She took a small white waxed box from out of the bar fridge by the door. Ness opening the box and took out a small cupcake with deep red edges and creamy white frosting. She stuck a candle in it and lit it as she presented it to him "If I recall correctly, someone demanded red velvet cake?" she smiled as the light of the flame danced on his skin. "Happy birthday." He took the little cake and blew out the candle. "Did you make a wish?" she asked.

"Don't need to." A smouldering look of passion ignited in his eyes. "I have everything I could wish for right here." He put the cake down and reached his hands for her, pulling her face to his and pressing her with a lustful, heated, bruising kiss. His hand ran up and down her body, setting it alight.

She could fell his need pressing into her as his body surged against hers. Recognizing his hunger, Renesme moved away from him, breaking off the kiss. Panting, she sat down on the edge of her bed to compose herself, she patted the space beside her for Jake to sit. "Sit down Jake, we need to talk."

Jake sat, his heart sinking to the floor. _We need to talk? What the hell!? She's breaking up with me. She's breaking up with me on my Birthday! _"Are you breaking up with me? Cause that would be bull-shit if you are. You can train and go to the MP-Fucking-whatever-F's and still have me in your life. I'm not letting you break up with me."

"What? No! Jake." She laughed at the total opposite direction his mind had headed. "I'm not breaking up with you. I honestly think it would kill me to do that. Relax."

The lines on his face visibly smoothed as she rested her hand on his chest. "This is so embarrassing" she mumbled to herself as she leaned her forehead on to his shoulder her hands drifting down to his abs, felling the ripples under her fingers. She took a deep breath and squared herself. She stood up, and turned to face him, placing both hands on his shoulders, she locked her arms, bracing herself. _Just spit it out Red!_ "What I need to tell you is…I'm a virgin. I want to have sex with you, just not yet. Not tonight." She swallowed hard, waiting for a response, any response from him.

He just stared at her. _Right. so NOT breaking up with me then. _ His mouth was gaping like a fish.

"Say something." she ordered standing upright, her arms protectively wrapping around her middle.

"OK?" he offered. "I wasn't planning on doing anything tonight, just for the record." He tilted his head looking out the window smiling. "Tomorrow night maybe." He joked.

She shoved him, "Don't be a jerk. It's embarrassing enough to be so inexperienced. I just wanted to let you know where things stand." Her leg jittering, he reached for her hand, pulling her to sit back down next to him.

"Ness, you think I'm any more experienced than you?"

"But, Aponi." She reasoned, leaving the rest unsaid.

"We mucked around a bit, that's all. I never slept with her. She offered, but I didn't want to. Not with her. It's more than just the sex Ness. It's about respecting someone. Caring about them. A give and take." He paused, sweeping his thumb across her cheek. "It's called making love cause you're meant to love the other person. Like I love you… I'm in love with you Renesme Masen."

She grinned a slight lopsided grin, as her tears trickled down her cheeks. Her heart exploded and her stomach flittered. _He loves me! _She took him by both hands and laced her fingers with his, there palms touching. The woven bands they both wore on their wrists twisting into a figure eight. She leaned into him and pressed their brows together, noses touching. "I love you too Jake. I think my soul found its mate on the stage of Meany Hall but I was too dumb to see it." She cupped her hands around his jaw and leaned in to kiss him.

Her lips met his softly as she kissed first his top lip, then his bottom lip. She feathered light kisses along his cheek and down his defined Jaw. She ran her lips along his other cheek and kissed each eye lid before making her way back to his mouth. She met his lips with more force this time, dipping her tongue into his mouth. She ran the tip of her tongue along the edge of his teeth and sucked on his lower lip. Jakes hands had made their way under her shirt and his hands were fanned around her back, his thumbs rubbing circles on her abdomen. _Just because I said we can't have sex tonight doesn't mean we can't have little fun. Renesmee_ kneeled up onto the bed and threw her leg over Jakes lap, straddling him as he sat on the edge of the bed.

She pressed her hips in to his, through their jeans she could feel his hardness. He moaned into her mouth as his hand reached the back of her head and he pulled her kiss in further. She could feel her breath quicken and the feeling of him against her centre was sending shocks of heat through her body. She pushed him back on to the bed still straddling him. His hands, now rolled down her side as the heel of his hand brushed over the rise of her bust. She broke off contact, sitting up.

Jacob jerked his hand away, worried he'd taken a liberty too far. "Sorry." He apologised.

She whispered in a throaty voice as she rolled her pelvis against his rigidity. "Don't' be sorry Jake," She leaned over the bed looking across the room. "Stay. Right. Here." She ordered, as she dismounted, then she dove to reach something under Bella's bed. She grinned with mischief as she held up a Grey and Purple scarf.

Jake bellowed out in laughter as she shimmied over to the door, wrapping it around the handle. Shutting the door, she turned so that her hand was still behind her. She stood, eyeing Jake as he lay on his back, his arms folded behind him, propping up his head.

Jake heard the click as she locked the door from inside. He was roused at the way her hips rocked as she slinked back towards him. She reached behind her back again and unclasped her bra, threading it though her sleeve and expertly removing it through the arm hole. "I think this is ok." She stated. Fire blazing in his eyes he nodded, "Defiantly ok." His voice thick with desire. She undid the draw string of her track pant, slowly pulling the threads apart as the bow unravelled, then she threaded her thumbs into the waist band. "What about this?" she tested, looking up through the wisps of hair that hung in her eyes. "Still ok." Jake confirmed, enjoying the private show she was giving him. She lowered the cotton over her hips revealing the plain black bikini pant underneath.

She sat on the mattress, half sitting on the bed as she lifted her legs up, her feet towards Jake. "Help me." She asked. He sat up and unzipped the small zips at the ankles. She pushed them down over her feet as Jake, bunching the pants up, unceremoniously dumped them on the floor. Ren reached for the bottom of his sweater and t-shirt together lifting them over his head. "This is unquestionably, ok." He added, not even waiting for her playful question.

Renesmee nodded, splaying her fingers over his chest. "But this is enough skin for tonight. Is that ok?" Jake held her face with both palms. "Ness, this is amazing. You are so bloody hot, I don't think I could handle seeing any more of you or I'd explode, literally." She laughed, her cheeks turning a crimson red.

She lay down next to him, nestling into the crook of his shoulder, her fingers gently scraping along his chest sending sensual tremors over him. She leaned her face up to his and kissed him softly. He'd had enough of soft. He rolled over on top of her, their bodies pressing together. His mouth crashing on to hers, she responded quickly, parting her knees and pulling him closer as he pressed his need against her panties. Supporting himself with one hand the other smoothed over her chest, cupping around her breast. He gently massaged her peaks, softly pinching her nipples between his fingers. The sensation coursed through Renesmee, sending a surge of wetness between her legs, she bucked her hips to his, pressing in to the erection that was trapped in his jeans. Ness broke off their kissing, breathless. "You can take off you jeans if you want, it can't be very comfortable in them."

Jake breathed in to her ear. "I'll take them of latter. Right now I think it's safer for both of us if I'm a little uncomfortable." She reached down and rubbed her hand along his hard member through his pants. He moaned "Fuck. Oh Ness, if you keep doing that it's gunna get real messy." She continued rubbing long strokes over his fly. "That's the point Jake." Her acknowledgment of her carnal plan was his victory.

He bent his head down to her nipples and through her shirt he pulled her into his mouth, sucking on the fabric, he flicked her teat with his tongue. She moaned as pleasure surged through her, a tightening in her stomach, her core tingling. His mouth moved up, kissing along her neck until he reached her mouth. His hands found the skin of her stomach under her top as he slid his fingers up, caressing the lower edge of her breasts, his calloused fingers skimming over her nipples as they contracted under his touch. He switched to the other mound, pinching and twisting. Both of their hips rocking together, Ren still rubbing in long strokes over his manliness. Jake lifted up her shirt bringing his tongue over the bare flesh of her hard nipples. He bought her nipple into his mouth sucking gently, the pulling creating a heat in her core she was almost at her boiling point. She reached to Jakes fly, opening it enough to expose him. She rubbed quick circles around it while he suckled and licked her chest. Ness continued rubbing Jakes tip and stroking his length. As he sucked and fondled her nipples she made quiet calls of pleasure. Hearing her sounds of pleasure brought Jake to his height. His seed spilling out onto their bellies.

He rolled onto his side half sitting, reaching for his shirt. Jake rolled it up, pressing it into their stomachs, wiping up his spill. The suddenness of his release had caught him off guard surprising him and leaving him embarrassed. "I'm so sorry. What a fucking mess." Renesme pulled him pack down, pressing his head into her chest as she played with his hair. "Leave it. Just relax. Be here with me." She closed her eyes as she breathed in his sent. He smelt like pine and Earth and man. It smelt like him. She liked it. "I want us to be ok with everything Jake. Step by step. And that was just step one. I want to know everything there is to know about you Jacob Black. Good, bad, clean and dirty." He rubbed his face into her hair, breathing in the lavender sent. He allowed himself to be in the moment, enjoy the beautiful women in his arms. "Thank you Ness. That was so good." He reached up and coiled a curl of her hair around his finger, unwinding it and laying it over the rise of her chest. "I love you Renesmee. Can you imagine how good the real thing will be? If it's anything like that just was, were going to need more than a weekend." With her shirt still up, exposing her, he traced the curve of her breast with his finger. Running it up and down over her nipple brushing the swell on the side with his fingernails, sending shivers over her. "You are so perfect." He stated. He could feel her shaking her head, "No one's perfect Jake."

"You're perfect for me Ness." Renesmee revelled in his love, lightly running her finger over his soft lips. "I love you." She replied. He gently lowered her top back down and they snuggled into each other as they drifted off to sleep with whatever clothes they still had on, wrapped in each other's arms.

* * *

**French & French-Créole lines**

**L) I thought you didn't date?**

**R) I didn't but now I do.**

**L) maybe you need a bit of Creole in your native mix**

**R) Fuck you Laurent!**

**Well, what did you think? 8.2 seconds, Ness is fast (and so is Jake) Ha! sorry. I couldn't help the jab.**

**Thanks for the Reviews. They are very welcome, making my day a little brighter.!**


	16. Chapter 16 Prospects

Jacob woke to find himself twisted around Renesmee. Her toned legs draped around his. At some point in the night he had awoken and removed his jeans, sleeping only in his boxers. He lifted his head propping it up with his arm. He looked over the woman sleeping next to him, the way her long neck followed down merging with her chest and shoulders. Her creamy skin, smooth and soft. With her eyes shut he could see how her long lashes brushed against her cheek, a curl of her long hair falling across one eye. Wanting to see all of her face he reached over a brushed the hair away, over her forehead. Her face turned instinctively to his hand a small smile starting on her lips. She sleepily opened her eyes, the way her striking green eyes looked up at him melted him like hot candle wax. "Morning." She smiled sleepily. "That was the best night sleep I've had in weeks."

"Morning love. Me too."

Jake leaned over her kissing her softly, she responded in kind, lifting her head off the pillow to intensify the pressure. Jake broke off the embrace. "I've got to have a shower. Can I borrow a towel?" he asked as he swivelled, sitting on the end of the bed sliding his jeans on.

He glissaded over to his duffle bag, finding himself a fresh set of clothes as Renesmee pulled herself up also. She walked over to her wardrobe sliding on a pair of old track pants. Jake felt his dick twitch as he watched her milky ass bending over exposed. He hurried over to her, holding her from behind as he pushed his denim clad crouch into her, the same way he had done all those weeks ago in Charlie's kitchen. The difference being, this time Renesmee arched her back, righting herself and leaning into him further.

"It's amazing how sexy you are even when you're not even trying" he rumbled, his voice deep and rich. With his front pressing into her rear she reached her arms up and held him behind his neck her body turning slightly into him she tilted her head up and tenderly kissed his jaw. He ran his hands over her sides sweeping over her breasts, she gave a little guttural moan as his thumbs brushed her nipples.

Her sounds quickened his desire and he turned her around to him pressing her against the wardrobe his lips crushing onto hers. Mouths, tongues and teeth clashing as the couple consumed one another. He pulled one of her legs up to his hip, his powerful hand gripping around her thigh as she balanced on one leg. The other hand reaching up under her shirt cupping her.

"God you two! Get a room!" called a female voice from the doorway. Jake and Ness jumped apart, Ness bumping her head on the cabinet above.

"Jesus Bella. Ever herd of knocking?" called Jake as Bella unhooked the scarf off the door tossing it under her bed.

"Ha! About time I repay both of you with a little barging in!" she cheered pointing at them both and nodding her approval of their compromising position.

Rubbing her sore head, Renesme busied herself, looking for a fresh towel to give Jake, she was feeling mortified beyond belief. Jake, on the other hand, was laughing at the situation, always so comfortable in himself. "Relax Ness, Bella loves us both, she's only being a shit, aren't you?" he grinned, rubbing his knuckles into Bella's hair like a little brother does. She pushed him away as he scooped up his clothes taking the towel from Renesme. He kissed Ness chastely on her heated cheek. "I'm going to wash up."

She watched as he swaggered out the room, his chest bare, the muscles in his back rippling as his arms swung, his butt tucked attractively into the low slung jeans.

"Would you stoop eye fucking him for two seconds and tell me how your night went!" exclaimed Bella a little too loudly. Ness could hear Jakes laughter as he moved down the hall. "I wasn't _eye fucking _him." She defended, she looked down to the linoleum on floor of their dorm and shrugged. "I was just… admiring. And we didn't 'do it' last night either."

Bella took her hand and the friends sat together on the small cough. "Why not? I thought that was the plan for this weekend. You invited the boy down to stay with you. It's pretty obvious what the plan was." Renesmee's eyes popped open, her hand flush against her chest. "Oh God. I invited him down to stay didn't I?" mostly talking to herself she rambled on, "What else would he think? He said he wasn't expecting anything, but maybe he was just saying that?" she stood, pacing back and forth. Her hands gesturing wildly, her thoughts a mess. "It's not like we didn't do _anything._" she explained to Bella. "It's just that we didn't…" she swirled her hands in the air, willing the words to flow. "Go a_ll the way._ I have a really important race today and I didn't want to be sore. What if it was so bad it effected my run?" Ness lost herself in an intriguing idea. _ I don't have a race tomorrow. We could have all night and tomorrow to ourselves. _

She turned suddenly kneeling in front of Bella, gripping her tightly by both hands. "Bella, can you sleep at Angela's again tonight. Please."

Bella pulled her hand from Ness'. "You can let go of my hands Ren. You have my attention. And Yes, I was planning on staying at Ange's again anyway."

Distracted by her own thoughts Renesmee sat. Bella was taking some sort of Female sexuality in Literature class and she seemed to have a never ending supply of erotic literature. Not to mention there was always a Cosmo or similar magazine with an informative sealed section sitting on the rec room coffee table for reading. Ness thought she had a good grip on 'how to be good in bed' (pun intended) but it was one thing to put the theory into practice and the thought both terrified and thrilled her. "Bella, can I ask you something?"

"What?" she asked, her voice taking on a mature tone. Bella knew full-well the direction their tête-à-tête was headed.

"Did it hurt much?"

Bella chewed on her bottom lip, thinking carefully about her response. "Yes. A lot. Even a few of the times after. But if he's _good_, it will feel good overall, so you won't mind so much. But you were probably right not to do it last night. I remember it still hurt the next day, it killed to pee too." Bella looked at her friend, she saw the terror in her eyes. She felt an instant regret over her candour and quickly tried to think of something to allay her uncertainties. "They say if you use tampons you kind of tear it yourself, so maybe it want be that bad." She added pitifully.

Bella decided then and there, that the best course of action was to have a little chat with Jacob, the birds and the bee's one-o-one. She didn't want either of her friends hurt in any way. Bella thought she could be a surrogate sister to Jake. If that is what big sisters did?

"Yeah, maybe" Ness agreed half-heartedly, still feeling less reassured than she did before. "Maybe I could take some aspirin before or something?"

"It couldn't hurt. But my best advice would be to take it slow. I mean before, like, make sure your… ready… down there. And _really_ slow when it goes in." Bella stood making a grunting noise. "I can't believe I'm talking about Jake's junk. This is so weird."

Renesmee was still lost in her own world, thinking about what plans she would put in place for the evening. She wondered over to her bed, carefully placing the pillows and smoothing out the covers. Once done, she huffed and flung herself down on top, half pulling the cover over herself, this of course left her bed the dishevelled mess that it was only minutes earlier. She propped herself up on an elbow and looked over to Bella, a look of deliberation on her face. "Bells, do you have any lacy nighties or something I could borrow?"

Bella smirked, moving over to her chest of draws. "Do I have lingerie? Have you met Edwards's sister? Yes. I most defiantly do." She prided, opening the draw of her secret stash. Ness got up off the messy bed and both girls began to sift through the pile of sheer clothing. "I like this one." Commented Renesme, holding up a simple white chemise with black lace trim just as Jake entered, fresh from his shower. Renesmee's fingers froze on the satin and lace she was holding up and thrust it back into the draw, slamming it shut.

Jake laughed as he watched the two girls tunning around in a panic. They looked like little dear in headlights. He had no idea what they were doing to make them look so flustered but he new to leave well enough alone. Still laughing, he said to Ness, "Are you having a shower? Cause if you are, make it snappy, I'm taking you both out for breakfast and I'm hungry." Renesmee picked up her folded clothes and scurried out to the bathroom.

Bella watched Jake with a knowing eye. "So you had a nice time last night, hey?" she asked, in an attempt to be the big sister she always wanted to be, not as the former object of his desires. His lips jerked, his eyes narrowing, "What did you two talk about while I was gone? Do girls ever stop chattering?" he huffed as he tidied the covers of Renesme's bed. _Our bed_. "Yes. I had a very nice evening with my girlfriend, thank you for asking." A fair amount of resentment in his tenor.

"Alright Jacob," she atoned, " Calm down, I don't want details. Really, I don't. What I do want though, is to make sure you've done your homework." Jake look at her with puzzled eyes, her direction lost on him.

"Do you know what she has planned for the two of you tonight?"

"No, but I'd say that's between me and her though!" Jake stilled his hands, turning to look at his friend. Was she jealous? Did it take finally moving on and finding someone he who could love that could love him with as much passion in return? _I don't love you like that anymore Bella._ "Why are you suddenly so interested Bells?"

"I'm not actually. I just really care about that girl." He head gesturing to the door Renesmee had just exited.

"So do I." he defended. His arms crossing over his broad chest.

"I know you do. But she's more frighted about it than I'll bet she's letting you know. I just don't want to see her hurt, emotionally and physically... All I'm saying is do you home work."

Jakes annoyance quickly turning to embarrassment as he realised what she was endeavouring to talk about. Jake was slowly turning a russet tinged red, mortified Bella was having this discussion with him. "What the hell is that supposed to mean? Watch some porn? I think I know what goes where Bella."_ Did she just have this discussion with Ness too? Kill me now._

"I don't mean basic anatomy Jake. You might know the essentials but there's more to it than just a penis, a vagina and a hymen."

He turned looking out the window as if he wanted to jump right out of it, just to get away from the uncomfortable one-on-one. _it cant be that far down._ She continued, on a roll. "There is an entire instruction manual out there and I wish I'd made Edward read it first."

"Oh God Bella. I don't want to talk about this." He groaned, desperate for escape. She rummaged around her desk draw, pulling out a small book and handing it to Jake. He read the title, 'How to have sex for the first time' and he looked at his friend with unbelieving eyes. "Are you seriously giving me this to read?"

"Just read it. It won't take you that long." She instructed. "Hide it in a comic or something. Read it when you're at the meet."

Shaking his head madly he pushed the small book back into her hands. "I don't want it Bella. Thanks, but you keep it."

"No Jake, you do need it. You love Ren right? And you don't want to hurt her right?" he nodded, knowing he was defeated. "Then you should read it. Humour me. What can it hurt? Even if you only learn one thing, it'll be worth it."

He was hunched over his duffle, hiding the book in his bag as Ness came back into the room. _I cant believe that just happened. I think I have three big sisters now. Great! Just fucking great!_

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**Poor Jake. That chapter brought back some cringe worthy teenage memories for me. Except I was the big sister! **

**Hope you enjoyed. Please review. (It makes me feel popular) :-} x M**


	17. Chapter 17 The Competition

Later that afternoon Jake found himself sitting in a back corner of the indoor stadium reading a newspaper. Well, that's what it looked like to others. Bells little book was quite informative. Very clear pictures... Jacob learnt a lot that afternoon.

Renesme ran a great time that evening, winning and putting her in good standings for the next meet and her chances of sponsorship. Jake meet her at the finish line as he had done the previous night. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes shone as her breathlessly jogged over to him. "You did good babe. 8.18, that's good right? She linked her fingers through his over the cold metal bar of the fence. "Yeah. It's exactly what I wanted to run. Gives me something to improve on for the Mountain Pacific's." she sat, taking off her track spikes continuing to chat. "I can't wait till the weather warms up." Her cheeks flushed from the exertion of the sprint, her eyes glassy with excitement as she talked about her sport with animation. "We go outside, and Jake! You can see me do one hundred meters. That's the real event. The one that counts. Did I tell you there's an invitational at USC, in LA this year?" she was looking up to the roof as if the stars were in her eyes. Jacob loved seeing this innocent care-free side of her. It made him love her even more, if that was even possible. "I've never been to Sothern California. We could go to Disneyland and we can swim at the beach."

"You do know Ness, I live about 500 feet from the Pacific Ocean." He chuckled. She shook her head and cheerful slapped the air in front of her. "I mean like, a real beach, a sunny beach, one with white sand where it's warm enough to actually enjoy swimming." She stopped, giving him a look of hope, her eyes shining like emeralds. "That's assuming you would want to go down there on a mini break with me?" she bit her bottom lip with eagerness. He laughed, her enthusiasm contagious. "Of course I want to go. Maybe I'll get some pom-poms and really be your personal cheer squad." She laughed out loud, jumping up and over the fence. Ness wrapped her arms around him pressing her chest into him. "I'd like to see you in a cheerleader outfit, show off your legs." She sniggered teasingly, he simply pulled her in for a kiss.

"Yeah well, will I finally get to see you in those little two pieces you girls wear?" she winked at him "If you play your cards right, you might even be able to take them off." Jake felt his arousal surge through him. After reading about sex all afternoon he was on the precipice already, Ness seemed determined to propel him over. "You ready to get out of here?" He growled, in to her ear, sucking on her lobe then feathering light kisses down her neck. She leaned in to his caress, closing her eyes to enjoy his touch. "About 20 more minutes. We have to wait for the medal ceremony."

Jake beamed with pride, taking photos on his phone as Renesme stood on to the top of the dais. She had put her U Dub track suit over her running clothes, her joggers were shoved on with the laces open and hanging down. Her hair was out and flowing over her shoulder in a crimp from having been in a tight braid. Ren's eyes were focused on Jakes as she stood up in to the platform, only leaving his for the briefest of moments to bend forward and respond to the man in a suit giving her the medal.

After the national anthem had played, Jake made his way over to Renesme, by then, many of the other athletes were gathered around her. She took him by the hand as one of the girls said. "Aren't you going to introduce us to your good luck charm?" Ness threaded her arm through his as she gestured to the individuals in the group. "Everyone this is Jake, Jake this is Courtney, Solomon, Chris, Darcy and Kate." There was a collective murmur of hellos. A tall, muscular, blond surfer type stood up to shake his hand, he remembered his name was Chris. He seemed to grip Jakes hand harder than was necessary in attempt to gauge him. "So you go to college here Jake?" asked Chris, his tone integrative. Renesme stood slightly in front of Jake her stance defensive in nature. "He's moving here in June to start studying." Jacob looked between Ness and Chris, he was looking at her with a burning that Jake understood. Jake's nostrils flared and his envious side swelled. Jacob could tell instinctively that this man coveted what was his. And he didn't like it.

Chris moved his hand and rubbed it along Renesme's bare arm. Jake really didn't like that. "You want to come back to my place? I'm cooking some post comp pasta." His question directed solely at Renesme, as if to give her an ultimatum between himself and Jake. Jake ground his molars together stepping in closer to pick the ass hole up by the neck of his pansy ass singlet. Sensing Jakes intension, Renesme's stance straightened. She leaned slightly into Jake, her back pressing into his chest as if to hold him back. "Sorry, can't." she rejected. "I've got a hot date with my native Adonis here." She inclined her head to Jake, wrapping her fingers through his, pulling him along. "Bye guys." she called to the others as she towed Jake through the field to the changing rooms.

Once they were far enough away, Renesme let out a grunt. "The nerve of him. Those pole vault guys really think their god's gift to women." She turned to Jake, a small grin forming. "I thought you were gunna hit him there for a minute." Jake huffed, nodding, "Until you stepped in I _was_ gunna hit him. Another ex?" he asked, the jealousy blistering off him. "What do you mean another ex? I don't have _any _ex's. He asked me out a few times. But I don't date remember?" She wrapped her arms around his waist as they walked together their steps synchronising. "It turns out, all I do is fall madly in love with my soul mate." She said, leaning her head on his shoulder as they walked to the far side of the field.

When they reached the other side if the indoor stadium, she unwound herself from around Jake and made her way into the female changing rooms. Less than ten minutes later, Renesme emerged in a pair of tight dark blue jeans and cream knitted top. She had a pair of tan pumps on that made her legs look like they went on for ever. She strolled over to Jake.

"You like what you see?" She asked as he placed both his hand on her hips. He leant down for a soft sensuous kiss. It was a nice surprise to only have a few inches to lean down he thought. Her hair smelt like cherries tonight and it cascaded down her back, her ringlets glossy and full of body as she walked. "You look stunning," he said, his voice thick with lust as his hands ran up and down her sides.

She leaned back, looking up into his dark eyes "Don't you want to know where we're going?"

"I don't mind, as long as I'm with you."

She took his hand as they made their way onto the street of the university. The chilly wind buffeting against them. The cold enveloping them along with the darkness. They hurried along and quickly found the shelter of the walkways as Renesme led Jake through the campus. They finally ended at the HUB at Pagliacci's Pizzeria where they had eaten the first night they had met. The night she had fallen in love with him. They once again shared a giant pizza, happily chatting.

"I've almost finished the motor on your Falcon, by the way. I'm going to attempt to hammer out the dent on the back myself and then it should be ready to get painted. You still happy with the original aqua?" she nodded, amazed at how fast he worked. Jake had spent most of his waking hours over the last two weeks re-building that car for Ness. "So will it be finished after the paint?" she asked, excited to finally be able to see Jakes handy work. "Almost, I really think we should re-cover the seats too."

Comfortable in the normalcy of their conversation, she picked at the pizza on her plate, peeling off all the olives and popping them into her mouth. She slid the now olive free slice onto Jakes plate. "Yeah, let's do the seats then, they were looking pretty damaged." He looked down at his dish, his head shaking in incredulity.

"What?" she asked, afraid she'd offended him by handling his food. "I know you don't really like olives."

Jacob looked at her, his brows knitted together, all talk of cars forgotten. His tone tender and amazed, "How do you even know I don't, like olives?"

Avoiding eye contact, she analysed the candle that sat in the centre of their little round table. Ness picked at the wax that had dripped on to the red checked table cloth. "I just remembered from last time we were here."

Jake stood up from the table his chair screeching a little on the concrete floor as he leaned over to Ness, kissing her softly on the lips, then he sat back down taking a large bit from his custom made slice. "Do you know how amazing you are? Nobody knows me better than you do." He took a large gulp of his water and wiped his mouth on the paper napkin.

He shuffled his chair over, bringing it alongside hers and placed both his hands on top of her thighs, moving slowly along the length of them. He leaned into her neck and whispered softly in to her ear. "I want to know you better than anyone else does." He kissed along her jaw and down her soft throat. His feathery touch sending heated shivers over her. She inclined her head back as he sucked on her earlobe, his teeth clinking on her earing, his hot breath flowing down her neck. "I want to know what makes you satisfied, what makes you moan, what makes you come. I want to wrap myself around you. I want to make you feel desired." She swallowed, her mouth dry, her crouch wet. Her body was leaning into his, swaying with the giddy feeling his words brought. She opened her eyes, her gaze burning into his.

She lifted her hand to his face and ran her fingers over his lips. Then she brought his hand from where it rested on the table to her lips and took one of his large fingers into her mouth. Never breaking eye contact, she drew in his finger, sucking it in and out, a tantalising preview of what was yet to come. She was a good tease. But he could tell from the look of hunger in her eyes she wasn't playing him. That was end of Jakes patience. He reached for his wallet, pulling out a fifty and threw it on the table. He gripped Renesme's hand pulling her up to him. "Are you ready?" he asked, the huskiness of his arousal in his voice. She nodded, her tongue slowly drifting over her lower lip, moisture gleaming off it. "I want you to know _all _of me."

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**I just got a new iPhone so I'm a little distracted by my shiny new toy. You might just have to wait a bit to see what's next! **

** I might be motivated by a few more reviews though! ;-}**


	18. Chapter 18 True love and Delusions

They hurried back to the student house, both full of expectation, keen to have their bodies wrapped around each other. The wind still buffeted around them, sending both their hair awry. As the entered the entrance hall of the dorm, into the warm sheltered quarters, Jake crashed Renesmee against the inside wall. His body pressing into hers. His hands gripping hers above her head as he pushed through the layers of clothes against her. His solid erection pressing into her through his jeans. She rocked into him her pelvis having a mind of its own.

She kissed him, her tongue gliding along the inside of his mouth. Moaning into her mouth, his knees weakening, he buckled down as her caresses melted him. "Let's go upstairs." She whispered breathlessly as she look his hand and lead him up.

Standing in the hallway outside the locked door, she flicked through her key ring, fingers trembling as she pushed the key in, turning the lock. Jake stood behind her, his chest pressed hard against her back, he draped her hair over her shoulder and kissed a trail along her neck, following the seam of her shirt. His hands were flush against her ribs, his open, flat palms sliding over her nipples through her clothes. She groaned as the lock opened and together they stepped through the door.

In the darkness of the room Renesmee reached her arm out, flicking on the light. She separated from Jake and threw her bag on to her desk and bent down to take off her heels. She turned to the door with the scarf in hand and noticed a small A3 yellow envelope on the floor, it sat in the floor as if it had been pushed underneath the door jam. Ness felt a cold shiver as a creeping feeling covered her scalp, she dismissed it, shaking it off. "What's this?" she asked, her eyes flicking expectantly to Jakes as she bent down to pick up the mystery object. She turned it over, on the front, in large red pen was a heart and inside it, in messy writing was the word 'Renesmee'.

Ness bit her lip and smiled to Jake. "When did you get a chance to do this?" she asked, turning it back over to open.

Jake frowned, shaking his head "It's not from me?" he said, a sick feeling setting on him.

She opened the envelope and held out her hand, the contents falling out.

It was photos, dozens of photos. All of Renesmee.

Candid, covert shots of her; at training at the track, at the gym, in the library, walking through the quad, her climbing into Bella's truck. She flicked through them, her breathing becoming erratic. The last was a photo of both her and Jake. She was in her long black spandex pants, she was leaning into him, the fence of the indoor stadium between them, she was kissing him and his hand was cupped around her ass. _That was just last night! _The truly unsettling part about the picture however, was how Jakes face had been scratched out. Like the intruder couldn't stand seeing his face. Deep gouges were broken in the gloss paper, the white backing of the photo visible from the front.

Renesmee's heart pounded. She felt the panic rising in her. She lunged for the open door, slamming it shut and locking it. She leaned into the door looking at Jake from across the room as he flicked through the photographs once more. "Some of these are _months_ old Ness, it's summer in this one." He held it up to her, it was one of her sitting in an outdoor checked rug, the sun was bright and the suggestion of a picnic lunch was on the image. The photo was zoomed in on her only, all evidence of the friends who might have been sitting next to her cropped out.

"This is scary Jake. What am I gunna do?" He stood up from the bed, striding over to her. His arms wrapped around her, her face pressing into his chest as she breathed. "_We_ are taking this to the police. I won't let anything happen to you. I promise. I'll keep you safe and sound. Well find out who this fucker is and then I'll fucking rip his throat out."

They spent a large portion of the night in the university police beat. Ness was racking her brain to think of names of anyone who might be likely to do this. She came up with several, there were many guys who had shown an interested in her, all had been rejected, bar Jake. He sat by her, rubbing his warm hands over her back, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze as the questions continued. There wasn't much the police could do though, as disturbin was there wasn't actually anything illegal about sending someone a 'gift' or taking photos of that person in public places. Ness felt sick to her stomach.

It was approaching three in the morning before they finally made it back to the room. Quietly they changed into their sleep clothes and slid into bed. Jake held her as she nestled in to him, he shushed in her ear as her tears fell. He held her till her tears gave out and she slept. Jake closed his eyes as he kissed her hair, breathing in her floral smell. All he wanted was to protect her. Care for her. Safeguard her from the crazy person who thought they had some moronic claim on her. _Knowing _her would have to wait.

- o ~ O * O ~ o –

The next morning Ness and Jacob slept late. Bella came home around lunch time and they filled her in on the events of last night. Felling stifled by the confines of the dorm the trio decide to go out for lunch before Jake had to head back to La Push in the afternoon. Ness was glad for the exertion. She needed to get out. Have some fun. She wanted to at least try to maintain a normal life. Not allow herself to be crippled with fear.

They got as far as the car park before the smokescreen of a normal life vanished.

As they approached Jake's car they were stopped short by the scene in front of them. The words 'Go Away' had been sprayed across the door in black spray paint. On the bonnet, lay a dead bird. Its eviscerated corpse positioned across the hood, wings splayed out like a crucifix. Its intestines fanned over the hood. A sickening, nauseating horror tricked through her. She ran over to the garden nearest her and emptied her stomach.

Bella covered her hands over her mouth and then ruffled through her bag to find her phone. "I'm calling the police." She said, as she moved closer, inspecting the car further.

Still feeling sick to her stomach, but done retching for the time being, Ness move back over to Jake. His strong arms bringing her in for a comforting embrace. "This is escalating." He muttered, "I read somewhere that once weirdos start killing things like animals, it's only a step away from hurting humans." He shook Ness by the shoulders his calm facade cracking as the panic seeped out. "I'm not letting you out of my site Ness. You hear me?" she nodded into his chest, squeezing her arms around his middle. "I'll stay here all week long, I'm not leaving until this psycho is behind bars or dead…Preferably dead."

She leaned back looking up to him. "You can't stay here forever Jake. I have classes. You have your first day at work tomorrow."

He shook his head, his jaw setting firmly. "I don't care about the _job_ Renesme. I care about _you_."

She looked over at the dead animal sprawled sickeningly on the hood. She re-read the words sprayed across the side. _Go Away._ It seemed so child-like. Such a juvenile comment for such an adult action. Whoever he was though, he seemed angry at Jake. Most of the hatred was directed towards him. She stiffened in his arms as realisation washed over her. _He _was the one in danger. Not her. All the things she had received had been gifts, weird and frightening, but gifts. This weirdo had an adoration for her, however miss placed. It was Jakes presence that had intensified the obsession to violence. As much as she wanted him to stay, to have his warm, safe arms around her. She knew the safest thing, for both of them, was for Jake to stay away from Seattle.

"You have to leave" she said under her breath. He looked down at her, his brows knitted together in confusion. She looked up at him through her wet lashes, her eyes met. She loved the rich colour of his eyes, the deep dark brown. She felt like she could swim through the colour, immerse herself in them, they were so loving, so expressive, so sincerely the windows of his beautiful soul. She wanted to memorise that chocolate colour, every fleck and golden highlight in them as his troubled gaze looked at her.

"You have to leave Jake. You can't stay here tonight. It's because your _here_ that this guy's done this." His mouth gaped open, disbelief muting him. "I don't mean that's this is your fault. I mean it's made him jealous. I don't think he's gunna hurt me. I think he's gunna hurt _you." _Her last words emphasised by the way she balled his shirt up into her fists on his chest.

"He might _try _and hurt me Ness, your right. But I wouldn't assume her won't hurt you too. I'm not leaving you on your own. I'm not." She stared into his eyes, her hands held his face as her decision solidified. She needed him to understand. She needed him safe, she needed it more than anything else in the world. "Yes you are. You're not staying here. I mean it. You're going home, tonight. You're going to start your new job tomorrow. Your gunna look after your dad. Your gunna fix up cars. Finish my car. Sit and pout for all care. But you're not staying here. Do you hear me Jake?"

"I hear you, but I'm not going. I'm not going anywhere. Definitely not back to La Push." Just as she was about to debate him further, a police car came in to the lot. Interrupting their first ever argument.

Once again they spent several hours giving statements and answering questions in the rec room. This time Bella was with them as well. It was mid-afternoon before they were done. Then they fetched up buckets and a hose and attempted to clean off the blood, feathers and paint on Jakes car. Renesmee scrubbed until her hands were red raw, the cold winter air freezing on her bare wet hands. The numbness was mirrored inside her.

Once the car was clean, they made their way inside to warm up. No sooner were the trio in the door and Renesmee was on the floor reaching for Jakes bag, stuffing it with his clothes. Jake crouched down to her, his head angled almost 90° in an attempt to meet her eyes. "Hey." He comforted, tipping her head up with soft fingers under her chin. "I'm not going Ness. Stop packing me up." She stared up at him, Jakes dark eyes were strong and determined. But she was more determined. She breathed slowly through her nose. Her teeth grinding together. She zipped up his bag and stood. With calm coldness the hung the bag over his shoulder. "Yes you are."

"God Ness! Why won't you let me look after you?"

"It's not me that needs looking after Jake. Now, go home."

"My only home is with you. Don't you get it?"

"I get it Jake. I get it. It's you who don't get it. You think I _want_ you to go? I don't _want_ this. I _need_ it. I _need _you to go. I _need_ you safe." She cried through clenched teeth. Tears threatening in her eyes. Her secret fears bubbling to the surface and over flowing with ferocity.

"Whoever this psycho is, I could take him." He puffed, attempting to mask his fears with confidence.

"What, you're immortal?" she snapped sardonically. "Unbreakable? Who knows what he's capable of? He could have a fucking gun Jake. A gun!" she was shouting at him now. "I can't lose you. I can't lose any more people I love. Don't you get it?" she screamed, her tears finally falling. "You have to go." She pleaded, her body shuddering with tears. Jacob pulled her in to an embrace. Holding her up as her knees gave way, her body racked with sobs.

Bella, who had been a quiet observer throughout Renesme's tirade came over. Placing a supportive hand on Ren's back she looked up at Jake and nodded. "She right. You're the one this sicko might hurt. You guys can't let him control your life. Were you just going to bail on your first day at work? Bail on your dad?" she didn't wait for his answer. "You have to go home Jake."

Jake glared at his friend. "Traitor." He accused.

"Don't be child Jake." Bella replied sharply. "Look at it objectively. I rang my dad. He said the same thing. Go pack to La Push tonight. I'll drive Ren down when she's free on the weekends. You'll just have to phone and Skype." She flopped down on to her bed, picking up a picture frame on her bed side table. "I have to do it for four years, you can do it for a few weeks."

Jake felt completely outnumbered. _Why did girls always band together?_ His shoulders slumped and his head hung as they walked back down to the car park. He threw his bag in the back seat and turned to Renesmee. She looked so fragile and scared, like a little bird, so easily crushed. A little red robin. _Rouge-gorge_. But behind the trembling lips and the red, tear soaked eyes, Jake could see her strength. Her determination. Her ability to rise from the gutter. To rise above. To survive. He pulled her in for a bone crushing, sole shattering hug.

"You know I don't like this." He muttered in to her hair. "I know." She whispered. He hadn't liked the idea of being away from her when it was just about missing her, but now, with a mad man on the loose he completely abhorred it.

The hot tearing in his gut shredding further as he breathed in the lavender sent on her, his chest filling. "When do you think you can come down?"

"I have to go to New Mexico next weekend, then we have the Husky classic here and MPSF's are the weekend after. I don't have anything the first week in March?" She sighed leaning her forehead against his. March. That seemed like a life time away.

Four weeks. He could wait four weeks. _It'll be torture._ _Blue ball torture_. _But I can do it_.

Ness smother her hands over his chest. "And don't forget, I'll be able to drive myself as soon as the cars finished."

"Watch how fast I work woman." He responded dryly.

He tried not to feel angry. But he was. He wasn't angry at her, just angry at the whole situation.

Why was it, he thought, that some people coasted through life? And others just kept getting streaming hot piles of turd dumped on top of them. It didn't seem fair. Life wasn't fair. But you get up, wash the turd of life off your shoulders and kept on going. Ness was a veteran at getting back up.

She held him tight around the waist, burying her face into his chest breathing him in. Then lent back, her hips still pushed to his, her back arched as she looked up to his face. "You know I hate this too? Don't you?" She said, her eyes searching for his understanding. "As much as it breaks my heart to say it. It's probably better this way. You, my boy are a very big distraction." Her hips pushed further into his to outline her gist. Then her mood changed, her shoulders slumped and she reached up to his face, her fingers brushing over his lips. The feathery light sensation sent an electric shudder through him "Sorry we didn't get to have the night I'd planned."

"Nessie, it was a perfect night… up until the moment we found psychopathic photos under your door. But the bit that was with you. Just us. That's all I need. To have you. To hold you. To love you. For you to love me back. That's all I want. You're everything I need and I… I want to be everything you need too." The conviction she saw in him liquefied her insides. She loved that boy more than her own life. She hoped it never came to that, but if it ever did, she knew, without a doubt she'd give the ultimate sacrifice for him.

"I love you Jacob. I don't think you know how much I need you, how much you've helped me already. I feel like I can trust myself to love someone. Open up, face my demons, face whatever _this is_." She gestured to the dorms where the photos had been delivered to. "Because of you. YOU did that for me. You _are_ everything I need." She place her palms either side of his face, pulling his tall frame down and lifting onto her toes so that their eyes were level. She needed him to understand the depth of her love. Her green eyes flicked back and forth between his. She was so close, their lips were inches apart, her sweet breath mingling with his. "Your _love_ is my nourishment. I'm nothing without you. YOU. You are my gravity Jacob." His heart swelled. He didn't think he could possibly love her more than he did and then she went and said things like that. He pressed his lips onto hers. Soft, slow. Memorising the feeling of her. He encased his hands around her. His fingers burrowed into her jacket, onto her waist as if they knew, instinctively that they belonged there. His hands roaming up and down her sides. Felling the ripple of her ribs. The seductive way her waist curled in, the curve of her hip. So feminine. His woman.

They stood together like that until the sun began to dip over the horizon, a honk of a passing car broke them out of their moment. "I guess I should go." The air was cold. The night was still. She felt like they were in there own little bubble. A bubble that she was prodding at until it was about to burst. "Be safe." She called as he settled into the car, starting the engine.

He smiled a sad lopsided grin and lifted his fingers to his lips and kissed them. "Right back at ya sweet heart." He called a he reluctantly drove off into the twilight.

- o ~ O * O ~ o -

About twenty minutes later, in the quiet of their dorm room, there was a knock at the door. Bella stood up, rolling off her bed to open it. She called at the latch. "Who is it?"

"It's me Bells."

She opened the door. "Jake? What are you doing back?"

"I forgot to tell Ness something." He said looking around the room for her. "She's not here. She went for a run." She added casually as she walked back to lie on her bed.

Alarm swept across his face. "What do you mean she went for a run?" he yelled. "In the dark!? With a fucking stalker out there!?" He threw his head back, his hands pulling at the roots of his hair. "Christ Bella. I go for twenty minutes and you already let her put herself in danger."

Terror spread through Bella. "I didn't think Jake. I didn't think about it being dark out." she started to pace the small room, her fingers fisted in her hair. "She always goes for a run to blow off steam. I didn't think."

Jake pulled his phone out and called Renesmee's number... No answer.

He called again... Straight to voice mail.

He called a third time... Still no answer. He left a message for her this time. "Hey Ness. Are you ok? Call me as soon as you get this ok. I love you." His voice breaking as he left the message.

He tuned to Bella as he moved to the door. "Will you stay here incase she comes back? I'm going to drive around a bit." Bella nodded as Jake Raced down to his car. He spent the next half hour franticly driving the streets of the campus, searching for her.

On that cold January evening the streets were deserted. The headlights of his car illuminating empty foot paths. The silhouette of the skeletal winter trees shot up into the black sky.

The moon was hidden behind thick clouds.

No stars were shining that night.

Darkness was enveloping him.

She was gone.

* * *

**Who goes jogging at night? Right?**

**Sorry about the giant cock block but, where's the fun in that?**

**Loving the review folks. I'm turning in to some obsessed maniac. Running to my phone to check if I have a new email review every half hour. its sick. I love it. keep them coming!**


	19. Chapter 19 Missing you

Jake continued to search the roads around the student residences. He made his way back to Nessie's dorm, parking out front. As he raced up the front stairs, he called her phone again. This time, it was answered on the third ring.

"Hello?" Jake let out a panicked sigh, almost a cry. "Ness where are you? Are you ok?"

There was as short confused pause at the end of the line. "I'm fine. What's wrong sweetie?"

"You didn't answer your phone."

"Sorry, the reception can be pretty patchy down here."

"Where are you?" he barked. His fear sounding like anger.

"I'm in the gym." She explained, bemused and starting to get a little peeved by his sudden outburst.

He had stopped walking after she had answered the phone, but now, he turned and started to run back out to his car. "Where's the gym?"

"In the basement. What's going on Jake?" he could hear the slight irritation and also the surfacing fear in her voice. He really didn't care. She was ok. That's all he cared about for the moment.

"Nothing. Just wait a sec." That was all he said before the phone went dead.

Ness huffed, looking at her now disconnected phone. Frowning and starting to feel a bit pissed off, she picked up her towel and wiped some of the sweat off her brow and neck. It was less than ten seconds later, she was picking up her water bottle about to leave the room when he burst through the door. He launched himself at her, holding her against him so hard it was hard to breathe. He was breathing heavily as he buried his face into her neck, his hands trembling against her.

"Oh god Ness. Don't you ever do that to me again. Ever." His voice muffled by her ponytail that hung over her shoulder.

"Do what?" She still didn't understand. Her irritation gone, replaced by apprehension as to why he was behaving like this. He looked scared out of his mind. "What happened? What's wrong? Why aren't you half way across the Sound?" she checked her watch. "You're going to miss the ferry."

Suddenly overcome with weariness, Jake flopped down on the workout bench, pulling Renesmee into his lap. She comfortingly wrapped her arms abound his shoulders and he lent into the crook of her arm, his forehead innocently resting in the edge of her breast. "I came back to tell you something. And when I got upstairs Bella said you'd gone for a run. You didn't answer you phone. It's dark outside. You have a stalker… I panicked. I've been searching the streets for the past half hour." He looked up, kissing her cheeks, her eyes, her jaw, her forehead her lips, it was if he was convincing himself she was unharmed with his lips.

"Jake. I'm not an idiot. I would never go running by myself at night. Even before I had an insane person after me. I was on the treadmill."

"I know. _Now." _He smoothed her hair over her shoulder, his hand caressing the side of her face, down her neck and over her ribs.

"Is Bella freaking out too?" she stood up and off his lap as he jumped up, pulling her out of the gym.

"Crap! I forgot. We'd better go see her before she reports you as a missing person."

Bella was almost as frantic as Jacob had been when they walked back to the room. After at least tem minutes of various hysterical sounds of relief, hugs and some tears, Bella said goodnight and left the couple alone so she could go and call Edward with the news.

Hand in hand, they made their way back down to Jakes car. They had to say their heart-wrenching goodbyes again. Another forty-five minutes of kissing and sweet-nothings in the near freezing cold, Jake took a seat behind the wheel. Almost two hours late.

"Be careful driving this late at night" she cautioned. "Pull over if you feel yourself getting sleepy. Or stop at a hotel or something."

Jake just shot her an unconcerned look. "I'll be fine." he reassured. then he threw the Rabbit into reverse and backed out the car space. He wound the window down and stuck his head out the window as he started to drive off. "I forgot to tell you what I forgot to tell you." Ness laughed, shaking her head at his jumbled sentence, nevertheless understanding exactly what he meant. "I LOVE YOU RENESMEE MASEN. DON'T YOU FORGET IT" he yelled, as he drove off into the frost laden night.

- o ~ O * O ~ o -

Renesmee's days were filled with school work. Her nights completed talking to Jake on the phone or just looking at each other on the computer screen as they went about there nightly routine. Her weekends were completely occupied with competitions.

She received two more _gifts _from the unidentified pursuer. One, a large bunch of flowers, with a card that read '_we are meant to be'_. That rattled Ness, but nowhere near as much as the other _gift._ It was a gold framed photo of her, it looked to have been taken as she stood on the medal dais in New Mexico a few weeks earlier. That meant the tormentor must have followed her all the way to Albuquerque. The frame burnt her hands like it was toxic waste, she ran to the industrial entrance of the residence and threw it straight in the large communal bins out the back. She wasn't safe anywhere.

The last weekend in February brought the Mountain Pacific Indoor Track and Field Championships. She still wouldn't let Jake come. However, the sponsor scout was there, and he watched her race and win, convincingly. She ended up being awarded a partial sponsorship, with the intension to review within the next three months. They were expecting big things from her. If she placed at the preliminary rounds for the NCAA's she'd be invited to Declare and run for Nike at the National Champs in Oregon. Her athletic career was on the rise. Her blood, sweat and tears were finally beginning to pay off. She hoped with a fervent plea that all her sacrifices would be worth it in the end.

Everything was going right, Renesmee was on an excited anticipation high that week. The endorsement was great news but she was happy mostly because, on the weekend, she was finally going to see Jake. She'd convinced Bella to take her to Rose and Ems place and Jake was going to meet her there on Saturday. Her stomach fluttered just thinking about seeing him again. One way or another she was determined to get him alone and naked and horizontal. She missed him more than she could have imagined and her body had been aching for his touch. She was ready. To say she was happy when Friday afternoon rolled around would be a giant understatement. Her soul was going to be reunited with its mate. She was euphoric.

- o ~ O * O ~ o –

It was a beautiful clear March Friday afternoon that Bella and Ness arrived in the in the town of Sequim, Clallum county. The girls were staying overnight at Rose and Ems place. It was a relaxing time for the friends, Rose fussed over Bella, inquiring about Edward- she had a secret crush- and she wanted to hear all about Renesme's athletic feats. She made homemade vegetarian pizzas. Rose and Em were both unwavering vegetarians. Ness had learnt to adjust to their diet when she'd move in with them. She still went 'veg' a few time a week but she found that nothing compared to a big juicy steak, especially when she was in the peak of athletic season. After the pizza, Rose made chocolate sundaes for everyone. Ren only had the ice cream, staying true to her vow of choc-abstinence.

Renesmee's Aunt Rosalie was in her element hosting a teenage slumber party for the two adult collage girls. They both went along with it, neither having had much involvement with the late night fun a sleepover could bring when they themselves were in high school. Both girls experienced major disruptions to their life during high school. Ness had been forced to deal with her Grand-mere's stroke and subsequent paralysis and additionally, to add to her self-induced ostracism, training had always been a greater priority than friends and parties.

Bella had moved schools in junior year and had eyes only for Edward within weeks of arriving in Forks, the only slumber parties she went to were with him- and there wasn't much sleeping going on.

They all moved into the living room where Emmitt started a warm, crackling fire. They sat around toasting marshmallows by the fireplace. It was so corny, Bella loved every minute of it and Ren, well, she was used to Rose's corn. Rose entered the living room with Renesmee's fathers' guitar in hand. "Let's hear some camp fire songs Red." She said as she handed the instrument to her. Ness sighed and rolled her eyes as she wound her fingers around the neck. She tuned the strings and looking to the celling, pulled her face into a thoughtful scrunch. "What do you want me to play?"

Em smacked his hands together, "I know… _American Pie_" Renesmee racked her brain, trying to think of the notes off the top of her head, she quietly strummed through the main cords she could think of and soon she begin to sing. Emmitt joined in loudly at each chorus, singing at the top of his lungs his booming voice loud in the night. Bella was on rolling on the floor in hysterics at his display. Ness played through each and every one of the six verses and as it ended brought the song to a finale with a flourish of quick, heavy strums.

Ness played a few more requests for them all but drew the line at Roses call for _Kum ba ya_. Shaking her head in embarrassment. "Aunt Rose, I just can't bring myself to that level of lame. Sorry! I just can't." Laughing, Bella got up to have an evening shower saying she wanted to leave early the next morning. Soon after, her foster parents said their goodnights, retiring to bed as well.

Ren was left to stare into the dwindling fire, quietly messing around with the guitar. She wanted to hate the instrument, she hated everything it stood for. But it felt so comfortable in her arms. The wood was smooth and the coloured band of folk-print around the sound hole, such a familiar pattern. She doubted she'd ever really be free of the demons of her childhood. But just like she'd let her heart open to Jake she thought she could find it in her heart to love the memory of her parents. One day.

Red Robin was starting to see the benefit of letting people into her heart. Sure, it left you vulnerable to heart break, but if the gamble paid off, and she'd put it _all_ on' Black', you were left happier and stronger and more at peace than she ever imagined she could be.

Ness wanted to use the notes she strummed to help her forgive, she'd never forget. But she hope that with her own life, full and content she could forgive. And heal. And truly move forward.

As she sat alone in the quiet, darkened house with nothing but the faint strumming of her fingers, the fear crept in. As always her thoughts were never far from who might be watching her through the windows. It was so unsettling to think someone had been watching and following her for such a long time. The frightened child wanted to hide away and run like she always had. Yet, on the other hand, the adult in her, the person who truly valued the life she was leading, she wanted to stand her ground. The woman who was falling in love with Jacob wanted to be an active participant in her own journey, she want so badly to keep on participating and see where this incredible journey took her. All she had to do now, was figure out how stop her fears from consuming her and continue to live her life the way she wanted, all with some creepy voyeur watching silently in the shadows.

Trying to clear her mind of her anxieties, she let her fingers form a few familiar chords. Letting the music come unconsciously until she felt her heart rate slow and her tight chest relax. She wasn't ready for bed yet though, so she kept playing. Renesme thought she might start playing more often. She missed her cello too. She resolved to try and commit some of her busy schedule to practice more. She didn't have the time to re-join the orchestra, especially if she was going to be spending all her spare weekends with Jake. But she could let the music sooth her in her free time between training and classes.

Ren thought of some of the precious memories she had of her and Grand-mere Sophie sitting in the living room playing their celli together. Rouge-gorge wondered idly if all Sophie's old sheet music was still in the bureau in the lounge. Maybe she'd have a look tomorrow.

Her thoughts came back to the instrument in her hands. She recalled a song she had on her iPod that she'd wanted to learn, it was one of the songs she'd put in on the mixed CD she'd given Jake for Christmas as well. She attempted to transpose the cords, committing them to memory. She wanted a new repertoire.

_o\O/o_

As promised, Bella left sunny Sequim early the next day, parting with Renesmee by seven and leaving Ness to her own devices while she waited for Jake to arrive. She wondered over to the old house next door. Her home. It was starting to look over-grown and run down after so many months of neglect. It broke Renesmee's heart to see the house she grew up in become so dilapidated. Her Great grandmother had been a very house proud woman. Always keeping it clean and neat. Working in the gardens had been her joy.

Renesmee walked up to the house, pulled out her key and let herself in. It had been nearly a year since she'd last entered that house. The anniversary of Sophie's passing was the next Wednesday. Strictly speaking, Ren wasn't meant to go in until the Will was finalised. The ongoing challenge from her biological Grandmother had come to a head. Renesme had ended up telling the lawyers that Elizabeth could have all the other properties except for the house in Sequim. It was the least valued in a monetary sense, but priceless to Rouge-gorge.

Ness opened the door and she was immediately struck by the familiar smell of the house; wood and bees-wax polish and lavender and old lady. The smell of home. The delicious cedar floor stretched thought the front room and down the hall, dotted with woven rugs and runners. The walls were white painted wood panels, stretching half way up the wall and then stepping into a light green wallpaper. It was like being in a time capsule as she walked down the hall to the kitchen in the back. Sophie's Kitchen. It was empty, bar the old gnarled table in the middle. No casserole was bubbling on the hob. The glass windowed cabinets above the bench sparse. The bowl that Grand-mere had always kept over flowing with fruit was now empty.

Rouge-gorge remembered fondly how she would come and go through the kitchen, snacking on an apple or pear as Sophie stood in her half apron cooking up something appetizing for supper. There was a hook on the wall by the back laundry door, the well-worn, dark floral apron hung still on the nail. Ness lifted it off and tied it round her waist as she moved back up the hall. She perused the front room again, noting the way her footprints had shifted the powder of dust beneath her feet, Renesmee decided it couldn't hurt to clean up a little. The house was exactly the same as she remembered it, a snap shot of her life here with her Grand-Mere; only now, a fine layer of dust had settled onto everything.

She vacuumed and dusted each room as if she was twelve again, doing her chores for pocket money. She found the reams of old sheet music and left them by the door to take back to Seattle with her. She opened windows and let the fresh air blow through, ridding the house of the staleness of her memories. Nessie wanted to make new memories this weekend. Treasured memories with Jake. She had been planning on just sleeping next door at her foster parents and then maybe sneaking into Jakes room in the middle of the night. Her eyes sparkled as a much better idea came to her. She wanted Jake to know her. Well, what better place than in the bed of her pubescent years? Ness made up her old bed and then, getting a bit nervous, put clean sheets on the spare- just in case.

She walked across the back gardens and through the gate in the fence that connected the two yards. Ness popped her head into Rose's kitchen to tell her she wouldn't be staying there that night. Then walked down to the corner store and picked up some fruit and fresh milk and a few things to make lunch and dinner for when Jake finally arrived. She hadn't been able to cook for him much. She was looking forward to the prospect of it.

On her return she noticed that the grass has started to grow as spring approached. Small buds and leaves daring to flower after a few days of heat. The rambling vines still carried last season's dead branches. Renesmee set to work clearing the debris. Trimming back overgrown hedges. Raking the old decaying autumn leaves.

She'd been working for almost an hour when she heard the purr of an antique engine. She turned to the road to see an exquisitely re-modelled aqua car pull into the drive. An even more exquisite man behind the wheel. Ren dropped her rake and sprinted to the car. Jake had enough time to exit before she was upon him. Her arms thrown around his neck, crushing herself to him. She kissed him, "I. Missed. You. So. Much." She said as she peppered her lips around his face until every inch of him had been kissed.

"Hey beautiful. I missed you too." He smiled as he placed the key into her hand. "I brought you a present." She wound an arm around his waist as she leaned to inspect the interior of the car. "When did you finish it?" She asked with child-like exuberance. Jake bit his bottom lip, happy to see her smile. "Wednesday. I thought I'd surprise you." She reached up, kissing his smiling lips. "This is such a good surprise. But seeing who drove it here is the best part."

Jacob looked at her face, drinking her in. Her green eyes were almost sparking in the late morning sun. She looked so happy, relaxed, at peace. At home. He'd missed her so much. He passionately hoped they could see each other more often now she had her own mode of transportation. Skype just wasn't cutting it.

He looked her over, taking in her muddy appearance. She had on her loose fitting jeans, the knees were soiled with dirt. A few buttons of her grey Henley were undone, revealing a hint of her décolletage, the long sleeves bunched up to her elbow. She noticed him eyeing her grubby appearance. "The garden was such a mess, she would have been _rolling over_ at the state of it. I couldn't help it, I had to tidy it a little."

"Let me help you. I don't mind getting my hands a little dirty." He said reaching into the back seat to grab his overnight bag. "I thought we could take old Betsy here for ride later. But you're not getting in her looking like that." He said, shaking his finger at her. "So let me help you finish this yard, then we'll clean up. And then…" he announced with pride. "Then we see what the old girl can do!"

"Old Betsy?" she questioned, laughing as she walked him up the porch.

"What? It's a good name for her."

"Ok. If you say so." She cackled as they entered the front door.

She took his hand and her mood sobered sightly as she led him into the home of her youth. "Let me show you the house I grew up in. The house where I became _me_." _Rouge-gorge_

* * *

**Hope you enjoyed getting to know Ness and her foster parents a bit more. I kind of had fun writing this chapter. There is still be a lot more to learn about out little Red Robin. There are many parts to make up the whole. **

**You'll be pleased to know, only one more chapter and you're in for some seriously sweet lemon meringue pie. I have all the ingredients and I am currently baking it. **

**Patience by pretties, patience. **


	20. Chapter 20 Energy

**The song playing when Renesme is in the Shower is ****Fields of gold**** covered by Eva Cassidy**

**Warning- The Lemon Meringue pie is cooked and ready for your consumption. Grown up food only. Not for children. **

**SarBearPidge: welcome to your education Bill !**

* * *

**Energy**

They spent a good hour in the garden working off some restless energy. They stopped to kiss or hold one another every few minutes, never straying more than a few feet apart. Renesmee saw a flash of what the future might hold for her with Jake. She treasured the idea of them making a home together one day. She could definitely get used to this domestic bliss. These were the memories she wanted to make.

They finishing up, putting away the tools into her Great Grandfathers old wooden shed. It had once been painted a soft powder blue. Now the paint was peeling off, the grey weathered wood was visible from underneath.

As they locked up the shed, Renesmeee's phone buzzed in her pocket. She answered and began to walk into the house with Jake following. She was nodding and ok-ing as she listened. She held her hand over the receiver quietly mouthing. "It's my lawyer." Pointing to the floor. "For the house." Jake nodded his understanding as he took out two glasses from the cupboard and filled them from the tap and cut up an apple for them to share. Ness smiled at him as he set it down and took a seat. He placed her glass at an empty spot at the table, there was no way he could have known but it was the spot she'd always sat at as a child. She thanked the person on the other end, pressed the end button and softly put the phone down on the counter. OK. _Wow. OK._

She sat down at the old wooden kitchen table, in her old seat. How many meals had she shared around it? It looked as old as the house. The stories that table would tell.., if only it could talk.

She inhaled deeply, her shoulders and body rising before she let it all out, her elbow resting on the table, her knuckles turned in, pressing into her chin and mouth. She looked over to Jake, raising her eyebrows. "Well it's done. I own this house… and two more in Seattle. The only thing my grandmother got was the house in Vancouver." She sat staring at the marks on the wooden table top in front of her. "I have a car, a house, sponsorship." She looked up at Jake, squeezing his hand across from her. "I have _you_." He placed his other hand onto hers rubbing small circles on the back of her soft skin. "I can't believe how good my life is right now. Everything is falling into place." She sighed, shaking her head with self- flagellation. "I'm frightened it's _too_ much good luck for one person." She picked up a piece of apple, chewing over her thoughts.

"It has nothing to do with luck Ness. You worked _dam_ hard to get as good as you are, I worked _dam_ hard on that car, your Grand'Mere worked _dam_ hard on making your life worth living, she gave you this house because she loved _you_ as much as you _loved_ her. And you have _me_ cause, well." He paused, smirking at his own joke. "I guess that _is_ pretty lucky." He grinned as he crunched another apple slice, chewing noisily. "But seriously, I'm here because I love _you_. More than life itself. That's not luck that's fate Ness."

No matter what Jake said, she did felt lucky he was here with her today. Maybe it was fate. Either way, she was happy, it felt like they were on a mini holiday. For the next two days there was no school, no training, no fears. Just one another. But it was only one weekend and come Sunday night, she'd return to Seattle and Jacob to La Push and all her troubles and pressures would come crashing down on her again.

"I love you Jake," she stood up, stepping over to where he sat. She looked exhausted all of a sudden, the happy carefree girl he'd seen in the backyard was gone, like she faded away by the ringing of her phone. She looked both older and younger inside this house, sitting at this table. Like all her cares were lifted and she was a twelve year old, telling her Great grandmother about her day in French and then, simultaneously, she looked ancient and broken, her eyes betraying the magnitude of hardships in her life thus far. So often he'd see glimpses of her, the real her. He thought, as much as she wanted to share everything with him there were parts of her she kept hidden away, he didn't even think she knew they were there, but Jake saw some of her vulnerability and he wanted nothing more than to ease some of her pain.

As quickly as it came, she then seemed to snap out of her funk, pushing her worries down, that too perfect smile he'd see before, plastered across her face. She leaned forward, "Thank you for being here." She said, placing a soft burning kiss on him, then stood straight, taking her now empty glass to the sink. "I'm gunna have a shower. Here, come and wait in my room."

She put her phone on her old study desk, turning the music on shuffle. She collected some towels from the hallway closet and clean clothes from her bag. The sweet voice of Eva Cassidy singing an angelic cover of Stings 'Fields of gold' began to echo throughout the house. Her smile was gone again and with an air of melancholy that Jake couldn't work out, Renesmee went into the adjoining two-way bathroom, leaving the door half ajar._ She seems happier here. More her real self. Not the person she thinks everyone wants her to be. But then she's so sad. I don't get it._

Jake could hear the thumping of the hot water pipe as water surged thought it for the first time in years.

Taking of his shoes he lay back on her childhood bed. He looked around the room, seeing the sprinklings of evidence to attest that this was certainly her bedroom, the hideaway of her adolescent years. On the shelf above the desk were an arrangement of shining trophies and medals. A pin board next to shelf still had affixed a flyer for a classical music concert advertising a date from years ago. There was a poster of a teen heart throb on the wall. The corners of the picture curing away and dog-eared. The bed he now lay on was simple, a single bed with a white iron arch at the head. The quilt was white, with lines of embroidered flowers along the edge. The kind of quilt your grandmother makes for you he thought to himself. A sheer white cotton curtain flapped gently against the open double window.

Jacob listening to the sound of the water coming from the bathroom, he imagined how it would look as it lapped over her body. He felt himself start to harden as he wondered about the plan for the rest of their weekend. It kind of felt like it could have the makings of a dirty weekend. _Did I bring enough condoms? Oh shit, I should have bought her flowers... I did build her a car though. But girls like romantic things like flowers not an old car they paid for themselves- you dick. Speaking of dicks._ His was defiantly fuller now, staining against his zipper, desperate to get out. Trying to get comfortable he shifted himself around in his pants uncomfortably. _I wonder if she's soaping up her tits right now. Oh yeah. I hope I can soap them up soon…. Fuck, I want to see her naked... She's really flexible. I bet she can get her… _He was snapped out of his fantasies by a soft cry coming from the other room. A thump against the wall, then a heart breaking wail wafted through the door. Jake sat up, on the edge of the bed as he listened to her soul racking sobs. His lust vanishing like a bucket of ice water had been thrown over him. He stood and walked over, leaning his head against the door, desperate instead to comfort her.

"Ness? You alright?" he called gently as he swung the door open.

"Jake." She called, sobs shuddering through her. He entered the bathroom to see the shadow of her through the curtain.

He could see her silhouette crouched in the corner of the shower, her cries were tearing him apart inside. Nakedness be dammed, he stripped off his shirt and jeans and stepped into the edge of the shower with nothing but his boxers on. He looked down at her and it shattered him to see her huddled in the corner, ankles crossed, her knees balled up to her chest, her arms reaching around her legs as her head hung down. Her hair was plastered to her head and he could see her shoulders jerking with each sob. "I played that song when I scattered her ashes. It's almost been twelve months." She hiccupped through her tears. "Every day I miss her. Being in this house. I miss her so much." She sobbed, "It's too much. It's all too much. Why can't I feel happiness without being reminded of my unhappiness," She cried, her sadness overflowing her head lifting up and resting on her knees to look at him, her eyes wet by the water and by her tears, her face was blotchy, her nose red and running. She was a mess. Jake thought she was beautiful.

"I'm so sick of being scared. I just want to live my life." Renesmee half turned towards him as a fresh wave of tears hit. He saw her naked body but at that moment, only cared about her soul and how it seemed to be shattering into a million pieces.

"Oh darling." He crooned as he stepped further into the shower and positioned himself behind her. Lowering himself to the floor, he wrapped his arms and legs around her, providing a protective cacoon as the water cascaded over them. Jacob sat on the bottom of that stall holding the love of his life until her tears quieted and the water began to chill. _So much for a dirty weekend._

Before the water could turn completely cold, he reached up to the tap, shutting it off. Renesmee turned and leaned her side into him, placing her cheek against his neck. Her hand above his heart. "Sorry you had to see that." She sniffled. After bottling up all her emotions over the past few weeks, hell, the past few years, the news of her inheritance was the last burden of life- irrespective of it being good or bad news- that broke the dam. For too long, Renesmee held dealt with things alone. Never relying on anyone's help or support. It was rare that she let people in. She had mastered the illusion of showing only the controlled, focused, flawless young woman she so desperately was striving to be. Life was so often too much for one soul to handle, a simple lesson of surviving the journey of life, was that love was there to help us share those burdens. Jake wanted so much for her to share her life with him. To divulge her innermost secrets. To hold her when she cried. To help her to see, what she perceived her weakness, as her strengths.

"Sweet heart. I want to know all of you remember? This part too. The good, the bad, the clean and the dirty. Your words remember?" She nodded, looking up at him, her hair still dripping as the steam from the hot water started to dissipate.

Her gaze fell over his body, down to his hips where there was nothing but a thin wet piece of cotton between them. She laughed, the kind of liberating laugh you have after terrible sorrow. The mood in the room perceptibly lifting as her eyes lifted to his. "I can't believe you got in with your boxers on." Her shoulders now jerking with amusement.

"What? I wasn't going to take advantage!" he exclaimed. "I was almost going to leave all my clothes on, but I only bought one pair of pants with me and then I thought, if I take my pants off, I may as well take my shirt off too."

She laughed again. "See that's what I love about you Jake, so practical even when stepping into the shower with you stark-naked, virgin, on the edge of a mental breakdown girlfriend." She chuckled shivering a little, goose bumps raising along her flesh.

Noticing her chill Jacob said, "Let me get you a towel." as he rose, lifting her up with him. He stepped out of the shower, keeping his back to her and he passed a large soft towel though the curtain.

Behind the screen she dried herself and wrapped the towel around her body, under her arms, tucking the corner in between her cleavage.

Jacob was bent forward rubbing his hair with the soft towel, his wet boxers discarded in a corner when Ness emerged from the cubicle. He looked up and quickly wrapped the towel around his waist. She wore the towel over her chest, her breasts supporting the white wrap, a corner was tucked in to her cleavage, giving Jake a small preview of what was underneath. As she stepped over the lip her leg glided out from the split of the cloth. He couldn't help put look at her long, sinewy thigh as it bent and moved as she stepped. He sucked in a breath. As much as he had seen her wearing less before, knowing she was naked underneath pushed him to want more.

She bit her lower lip, bringing it into her mouth as Jacob raked his eyes up and down her outline. His eyes were intense, Renesmee had had boys look her up and down, many times, and normally she would feel a discreet repulsion at their overtness. But watching as Jakes eyes travelled up her body, meeting with hers, sent a longing through her and a pulling in her abdomen.

He was standing by the door, his upper body bare. Ness' senses feasted on the hard muscle of his chest and shoulders, the ripple of his abs and the delicious way his hips made a V, disappearing below the towel that was, in no way hiding his desire. A craving to run her hands over his hard lines moved her reflexively forward. It was as if her limbs had a will of their own as she stepped towards him and ran her hands over his stomach. His arms had been hanging limply by his sides as she approached, his hands pressed against his legs like a school boy in gym waiting to be chosen. He closed the space between them, leaning forwards and gently rested his hands on her hips. "Do you know how beautiful you are?" he asked, throaty deep voice sending a shiver through her. "Do you know how much I love you?" He could sense the connection they shared, like a magnetic pull, holding them together. He felt like a thirsty man, lost in the desert, searching for water. Only, he hadn't realised he was parched, not until he had seen her. She was his oasis.

Renesmee tilted her head up, her lips hovering over his, the spark between them arcing over the space. "Show me." She purred as she reached her lips up, closing the gap between them. She was over her little bout of sadness, the negative energy cleansed out of her system. Instead, now she was full of another kind of energy, months of pent-up sexual tension coursing through her. She was well and truly ready for that to be released.

He kissed her, hard, his mouth coming down on hers with a bruising pressure full of the pent-up desire he had repressed for too long. Her body melted into his as his arms wound around her back, pressing her chest to his. He tasted the sweet juice of apple on her lips, her mouth opening as his tongue sort entrance, winding around hers, exploring the ridges of her palate, the edges of her teeth. Their breath and the heat of their bodies mingling. Reaching behind him he opened the door that lead to her bedroom. With mouths still connected and arms exploring, he stepped back through the doorway and turned her, stepping her backwards, towards her childhood bed. She stilled as the back of her legs hit the bed, a realisation of what they were about to do overcoming her. There breathing was laboured as he rested his brow on hers. Searching in to her eyes. "Are you sure?" he asked. She drew the side of her lip between her teeth, afraid to speak she nodded instead, trust echoing from her eyes.

Jake reached his hands up and placed them softly against the top of her chest, his palm resting hot above her heart. His fingers skimmed to the corner of the towel nestled between her breasts and lifted it out. He let the towel fall around her like an ancient roman statue as he continued to kiss her. His hand moved down her cheek, across her shoulder's and side, stroking her in a long single caress that ended at her hip. He stood back taking her in, she stood exposed to him in all her glory. He gasped in open mouth wonder at her stunning lines. She was more beautiful than his fantasies had imagined. Her skin was radiant, and flowing over her curves, her muscle flat and sinewy from hard use. Her legs were perfectly moulded rising up to the curve of her firm round buttocks. Her stomach was flat, the lines of muscle faint as her waist bowed sharply in.

He took in her ample breasts, they sat on her chest, full but not heavy, her pink areola contrasted with the lightness of her skin. Her collar bones swept graceful across her shoulders, her long arms affirming her physical strength. His eyes found hers, he lost himself in her green depths, her enduring strength of spirit shining from them.

Jacob felt his throbbing demand evident as he appraised the beautiful goddess before him. His hands wound around her face as he kissed her, slowly this time, languidly tasting her mouth, his lips running along her neck as he lay her down on to the pillow. He unwound his own towel and stood at the edge of the bed, his manhood standing proudly out in front of him. Ness looked over to him through her thick brown lashes, taking him in, her eyes searching up and down his physique just as he had done to her earlier. His long hair was still wet as it framed his strong jaw, resting on the thick muscle of his neck and shoulders. His chest was wide, she could see the muscle of his back as his defined arms reached to her side holding him up next to her. She appreciated the ripple of his six pack as her eyes strayed further down. It was thick and proud as it stood to attention. She wanted to feel the softness of the skin. She wondered what it would feel like in her mouth. To have her lips wrap around his fullness. The though brought a surge of wetness to her.

She half sat up, reaching out to him, pulling him down on top of her. Jacob rolled himself on top of Renesmee and pressed her down, his fullness hot on her thigh. His eyes searched into hers. "Are you sure you're ready for this?" He asked. The last thing he wanted was to force his advantage on her, especially after such an emotional morning. He did want her though, with such need that if she had have said no, he would have moved away, without hesitation, only… his body would have been screaming at him as he did. She looked up at Jake with all the love and trust she could muster and nodded, a smile of anticipation spreading across her features. "What about you? Are you ready?" she asked.

Jake stifled a laugh. "Are you kidding? I wanted to fuck you the minute I collided into you on that street!" He brushed her hair back over her temple, his hand shaking. "I'm really nervous though." He whispered in admission. This time it was her turn to stifle her amusement. "Oh God Jake, don't be, neither of us have a clue." She was shaking her head, her eyes searching in to his. "We'll find our way together. Ok? How about we promise to be honest. I'll tell you if I don't like something or if I do," she smiled a little nervous smile, her already flushed cheeks brightening. "And you do the same."

"Ok" he agreed. "What do you want me to do?"

"I don't know. How about more of the same? If you like it, I'm sure I'll like it too. I have so far."

Spurred on by her approbation of his caresses Jake began kissing her again. Tentatively at first, his pressure light, his mouth soft. His hands still in her wet hair as they wrapped around the sides of her face. She reached her hand up to his, grasping his fingers and bringing his hand to her breast. He felt her soft nipple harden and contract under his hand as he circled and pulled. He kissed her harder now, his tongue seeking admission. She responded by running her tongue over his inner lip, a small moan escaped his mouth as she did. He moved away from her mouth, kissing along her jaw, sucking gently on her ear, his breath hot against the wetness his kisses left.

He moved his mouth, grazing along the long line of her throat, his nose running back and forth over her rolling clavicle. The felling of his touch sending a sizzle of heat up and down her skin. Slowly, his tongue drew a line from the nook at the base of her throat downwards then between her breasts. He paused as he felt the uneven surface of an old silvery scar on her chest. How had he not noticed it before? He pushed the thought to a far corner of his mind as he moved his tongue down, sweeping the underside of her bosom, drawing circles around it, gradually closing in until his mouth brought her nipple in. Her body arched up as a sensual moan escaped her lips.

Her small hands were tracing the line of his body. Gilding up and down his back, her fingers skimming in the valley along his spine. He brushed along her chest, nestling his face between. Moving to the other breast sucking it in, he flicked it lightly with his tongue a she ran her fingers through his hair, directing his mouth down onto her as he sucked her nipples harder. Renesmee felt a tightening in her abdomen and a surge of wetness as his drawing pulsed through her. Her hips rocked into him, her body telling him what it wanted.

Jake brought his body back up alongside hers, his eyes drinking in the beauty of the woman beside him. He ran his hand over her breast, circling and pinching her nipple. His fingers tickling as they skimmed over her stomach, then mingling into the soft hair below. He looked down at her, her wide spaced eyes were closed, her rubicund swollen lips slightly parted, her breathing accelerated but even in expectation. His hand was motionless, waiting for consent to explore. She opened her eyes to see him look lovingly up to her. His eyes asking permission. He saw into the depths of her emerald eyes as her pupils dilated with want. She lifted her head, raising it off the pillow to bring her lips to his. Her mouth open, her tongue swirling around his.

His hands lingered in the soft springy down of her pubic hair. His fingers brushing all around her stomach, her inner thighs, her pulse points. It was an exquisite form of torment, his fingers touching her everywhere but where she needed him. Eventually, even inside her fevered aroused state, she became aware that he was hesitating, uncertain. She whimpered out in hot, carnal frustration. "Would you just touch me already Jake. It's torture."

He didn't need any more prompting than that. His fingers ran their way through her folds. His digits becoming slick with her wet. She cried out in pleasure as his first finger ran a circle around her nub. Yearning coursed through Renesmee, her peak building as Jake continued to suck on her nipple, flicking his tongue over it. He ran his finger over to her warm entrance as he started to rub her nub in slow circles with his thumb. Renesmee felt a pressure as his finger entered her. He moved it back and forth several times before adding a second finger, she felt a small burn as his fingers unlocked her further. She was unravelling, the way he was suckling on her breast and the amazing feeling of him rubbing her centre, it was taking her perilously close to the precipice.

Feeling his own need mount, he moved his hand from her mound and shifted her hand from where it was across his back, down to his erection, and began to kiss her again. She curled her hand around him, enjoying the soft smooth skin. Her hand moved up and down in time with his fingers as they re-entered her. Before long both lovers were too breathless to continue kissing, their faces pressed together as their panting quickened.

Ness lifted both her hands on to Jakes hips, bring him around to lie between her legs, her knees bending up, and her feet flat on the sheets. This was it. Then Jake sat back leaning over the side of the bed to his bag. "What are you doing?" she asked, the confusion and a slight hurt as to why he backed away just before he was about to enter her was evident in her voice. She saw his cheeks redden under his tan. "Um… you know. Protection." He mumbled. Lifting up a little square packet.

"Oh" she said with a flush of relief. "We…we kind of don't need it Jake." He looked over to her with a sceptical look on his face. "I mean, if this is your first time and it's my first time…" she tapered off.

"But I don't want to get you pregnant on our first time?" he said tearing open the packet. Ness just shook her head, pulling him down back between her legs. "I'm on the pill Jake. I have been for years."

"We really don't need it?" he asked a twinkle of lust returning to his eye. He'd heard his friends talk about it enough to know sex was better with just skin on skin. Not that he'd ever risk unprotected sex. But if she said they didn't need it, who was he to argue?

"Really." She assured taking the foil from his hand and tossing it. "Now are you ready to fuck me?"

Jakes eyes nearly bogged out of his head. He'd never heard her talk dirty and it was so fucking hot.

"Yes." He squeaked. "I am very ready to fuck you." He smouldered slowly, then his eyes softened as he thought about both their virginities and what it entailed for her. "But I don't want to hurt you Nessie." Jakes voice cracked, his brows lined with worry.

She saw his concern as she comforted him, tucking his hair behind his ear as their eyes connected. "I know. It won't be much, I'll be alright."

"Just show me how you want me to move." He pleaded. She nodded as she kissed him again, her hand reaching between them as she took Jake, guiding him to her entrance.

He could feel her warm dampness as he pushed inside her a little. It took all the strength he had not to thrust all the way in, impaling himself in her. She moved her hands to the small of his back pressing him down further inside. She felt the burning sting as he reached her barrier. She lifted her hand, silently asking him to still, waiting for the pain to ebb. A few moments later she pressed onto his back again as he pushed further in. The pain now was increasing, Renesmee let out an involuntary gasp.

Jake froze, "Ness?" he asked terrified and unsure. He kissed her cheeks, her eyes, her lips as if his kisses could somehow take the hurt away.

"Just do it Jake, push in, really fast." She instructed. He placed his lips firmly on hers, his hands cocooning around her face as he thrust into her, breaking through her hymen, sheathing himself on her. The pain was immense as she cried into his mouth.

He started to move in her again. "Fuck me Ness, you feel amazing." Overcome by her tightness and warmth and wet. She grabbed hold of his back, his skin pinching hard between her fingers.

"Wait." She pained.

He stilled, focusing on her again, he had a sick feeling as he saw the lines of distress on her face that he had caused. He continued to kiss her, peppering them around her hair line, against her closed eyelids, her jaw and neck until her face began to relax into the smooth plains he was used to seeing.

She moved his hips again with her hands, he pulled back further this time, slowly pushing back into her. After a few more strokes the sting began to subside further until it was only a hot scorch overtaken by the stronger pleasurable burn bubbling through her entire body. She started to rock her hips, meeting his thrusts. Her body was now ready and wanting. And God did she want him. Jake moved his bodyweight onto one elbow and with the other hand reached between them, fondling her nodule of pleasure. Contractions of ecstasy surged through Ness as their sweaty bodies swung back and forth.

Jake marvelled in the feeling of her surrounding him. Her hot warm folds bringing him in. He lifted one of her legs up, hanging it over his shoulder giving him deeper entrance. He dived in deeper, thrusting himself to his hilt. He continued to rub her as she moaned a writhed beneath him. His pace increased, his mind blank with his body working on instinct. Ness could feel the pressure building, mounting as Jake slammed into her over and over again. She felt her stomach contract and roll as her body began to shudder. In his frenzied state Jake called out. "I love you Ness. Fu-ck." He crashed into her again, his finger still rubbing small circles on her centre, he gently pinched her clitoris rolling it between his fingers. That was it for Renesmee. Quakes flooded through her as she reached her climax, her body stiffening up as she let out a cry that might have been heard from next door. "Jake, Jake, Ja-cob."

Jake could feel it as she had built, a fresh surge of wetness covering him, her walls clamping down on him, rolling along his length, he heard his name in her screams of pleasure as she shattered around him, bring him to his peak at the same time. He felt his back tighten as the sensation rolled through him. He held himself back on the outstroke; slamming back in as he exploded inside of her. Over and over he thrust in to her depths emptying into her until his movements reduced and he was spent. He collapsed down on top of her, her ankle still by his head, her knee pressing into her chest. An errant thought crossed his mind as his weight pushed her leg so it was pressed straight between them. _Yep, very flexible_. She angled out her leg, lowering into down and resting her heel on his calf. Their breathing synchronised both gasping. Jake went to move off her but Renesmee held him there. "Don't," she puffed. "I like the weight."

They stayed like that for a while, bodies pressed together, nothing between them, the lovers were merged as one. Jakes breath was hot on her neck sending the aftermath of their love in shivers over her.

Finally, deciding he really must be too heavy for her, he rolled off. She felt the slight sting as he disengaged from her, but the loss of _him_ was greater. She realised with a mature regret that, that was the end of her _first_ time. But not the last time, she hoped.

* * *

**They have finally done the deed. Yeah for our resident virgins no more. **

** I have had this chapter ready for a few days but was too nervous to post it. Well, now its done there is no going back. Hope you enjoyed it- but not too much (if you get my drift)**

**Aretee- I made sure to have a few ear and neck kisses in there just for you! Hope you don't stay cross eyed.**


	21. Chapter 21 Burns

**Who wants seconds? **

**We're just going to have a bit of 'the heavy' first.**

* * *

**Burns**

Jacob lay on his back, his head resting on the pillow they shared, Ness rolled over, pressing her breasts into him, she rested her head on the edge of his chest, her arm across him. She noted the play of his pectoral muscle as he drew patterns on her back. His hands circled around on one or two spots. She knew was he was tracing. He looked up over her head, inspecting the marks his fingers found. "Where did you get those scars from?" he asked, quietly but firmly, a candid tone of inquiry in his voice.

"I don't really remember." She answered flatly. "I think I was pretty young. I remember the pain when I got them but not who or how or where." He moved his hands up smoothing them over her hair as he arranged it over her back, covering the old wounds. "You have one on your chest too." He added. He wasn't sure why he said it, it wasn't as if she wouldn't know about it. He just wanted her to know that he'd seen them and even though he hated the reason they were there, he still thought she was beautiful. "They're circles. Do you think they're cigarette burns?"

Renesmee continued to stroke her finger over his chest, absently tracing over his lines. "Probably." Jake didn't want to push her but this was the most intimate they had been physically with each other, it felt right to open up emotionally about something as intimate as her horrible childhood. "Do you think your parents did it to you?"

"I don't think so. As much as they were both terrible at being parents, they were never _that_ kind of vicious. It was more of a hit, shove or punch if I got in the way." He could feel her shrug under his arms. "Normally, they were just too high to bother with me much. They had an on and off again relationship. Mum would always find another man in between dad though. I think it was probably one of her other boyfriends. I must have been pretty little." She paused in reflection. "It doesn't matter now. It was a long time ago. I have the physical scars to remind me, but there not that bad really. Not compared to what some kids suffer." There was a long silence as they both became lost in their thoughts, Ness was trying to just be happy, simply because they were here with each other. "I don't want to talk about them now." Ness said, as she sat up swiftly. She had folded her legs under her in a child's pose as she sat on the sheet, her long damp hair was falling in waves over there chest, her breasts mostly covered by the tresses with her pink nipples jutting through the curtain of hair. She had her arm bent across her chest, one of her hands was absently stroking a curl by her neck. The view of her like that reminded Jacob of an ancient painting he leant in art class in high school, Botticelli's Birth of Venus in her clam shell. To Jake, Ness was a deity.

As Renesmee sat, kneeling on the sheets, she ran her palm along the soft white cotton. Her fingers stoping when they felt the evidence of their love making. A small patch of dampness had soaked into the sheet, a tinge of pink swirled through it. She let out a long sigh. A mysterious relieved look on her face as she bit her lip as if she was trying not to cry. Jake sat up next to her, his hands settling on her hips as she continued to stare at the wet spot, her long hair falling over her shoulders, bruising against the surface of the bed. "What's wrong? Do you regret doing it?" he asked, confused with her sudden change in behaviour. She had so many hidden inner demons. Would he ever get to know all of them? She looked up, a small smile of relief on her lips, her lids heavy, tears were brimming in her eyes. "Hey?" He soothed, his hand cupping the side of her face.

"Thankyou." She said.

"For what?" he asked a he shuffled back against wall under the window and pulled her naked body into his lap, nuzzling into her neck and inhaling her floral sent.

"For being my first."

Not quite knowing how to respond he smirked jokingly, "Your welcome? And thank you too?"

She sighed a restrained laugh. "Sorry," she apologised knowing she'd confused him, "it's just that… I wasn't positive it actually was going to be my _first_ time. You know, because of my childhood." Jacob stiffened, an acid taste in his mouth. The thought of any one hurting her like that was too much for him to bare.

"Do you think you were… molested?" his voice catching on the word, barely able to get it out. The beautiful, fragile, strong woman in his arms shrugged, her eyes gazing out the view of her bedroom window. "I wasn't really sure, but now, I don't think I was. It's good to have that question kind of answered." She leaned into his chest, her arms wrapping around his neck. "I didn't even realise how much it was actually worrying me. I guess I was a little nervous that maybe I'd end up with some kind of repressed memory re-surfacing, or something."

"Oh Nessie. I'm so sorry you didn't get the type of childhood you deserved. The kind where you're loved unconditionally, always safe." He shifted again, pulling her down on to his chest, his arms holding her securely as she stretched out along his side, pulling the sheet over them.

He smoothed his hands over her hair in long comforting strokes. They lay like that for several minutes until Jacob broke the silence. "I have a really old memory of my mum. " He said, his voice low and tender, warm with his childhood memory. She loved the deep rumble of his voice as it reverberated in his chest. "It was one summer evening when I was maybe six or seven. We were having a BBQ in the backyard with some family friends and all us kids were running through the forest out back. We weren't that far from the house but, we must have encroached into a wolf's territory or… I don't know, maybe it was coming closer to look for food. But, we heard this rustle in the trees and it gave us a warning growl. One minute we were playing tag, the next we were running, screaming through the trees back to the house. Man, I've never run so fast in my life. I ran straight through the back yard where everyone was sitting, up into the kitchen and I launched myself at my mum. All I could think about was _she_ was the person who could keep me safe." He scoffed at his own childhood rationalizations. "In reality, she'd probably have lost big time if it came to fight with a wild animal. By my six year old self didn't think that. I _knew_ my mother would keep me safe. No doubt about it." He paused, taking a breath, his hand stroking along her cheek. "Your mother didn't keep you safe Ness. I didn't know the woman but I'll always hold it against her anyway."

"Do you miss her?" she asked, turning so she could rest her chin in his chest and looked up at his face. Ness realised she'd been quite a bit too wrapped up in her own crap to really take the time to ask Jacob how he was. Jake closed his eyes and nodded. "Of course. As the years go past I think about her a little less each day, but lately, I've been thinking about her a lot." He looked down at her his thumb lazily brushing over her thumb and temple. "I wish you could have met her, she would have loved you."

"What was she like?" Ness asked, lifting her hand up so her fingers could trace the contours of his lips and face as he spoke.

"She looked just like Becca and Rach, her hair was really long, like yours is. And she made really good cookies." He smiled wistfully as he went on. "She really hated washing up and always made dad do it. She would sing to me, all the time, bed time, bath time, in the car, when we'd go for walks along the beach. She had a really pretty voice." He paused, closing his eyes and shook his head. "I don't remember that much. I feel like.., like I didn't get to know her properly because all my memories are as an eight year old." Ness nodded her understanding, she appreciated, better than most, the way a memory could be so immature and naive through a child's eye. "But I think I knew her well enough to say with certainty that she would have loved you, if only because I love you and she would have trusted in my judge of character. But I think she would have loved you like a daughter because she would have seen the strong, remarkable, focussed yet extremely giving, soft, and loving woman all at the same time, just like I do."

Ness leaned into Jake's chest closing her eyes, "Do you have any idea how much I love you?" she asked letting his arms hold her, keep her safe, let him care for her, just like he'd promised.

"Only as much as I love you," he replied devotedly.

"So you're ok with all my wired child hood stuff? I was a little worried you'd freak out and then you'd leave me over all my craziness."

He held her tighter as she rested her head on his shoulder. "I'll never leave you Ness, you have to know that. The good, the bad and the ugly, remember. I want all of you." He paused felling her body, where it pressed in to him, her long leg wrapping over his hips. He lent up, buried his face into the curls cascading over her shoulder and skimmed his nose along her neck, her skin smelt incredible, she smelt like her; lavender and cherries mixed in with something else.., _sex_.

She smelt like mind blowing sex... and it was beginning to embolden his desire. He wanted to quash his growing need though, he wanted to show her how he felt in his heart, it wasn't just his body wanting her, _he _did, body and _soul_. Quite simply, what her felt was an indescribable worshiping adoration.

He breathed in the lavender smell of her hair again and made a breathy kind of sound hallway between a frustrated whimper and a contented sigh and rested his chin in her head. "Not being able, - or should I say, _allowed_ to go to Seattle to see you was bloody awful Nessie. I'm telling you now, I'm never going to be away from you for that long again. I don't care what you say. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, and if I did eat- nothing tasted any good. I couldn't concentrate or think straight." He turned slightly so he could nuzzle her neck, gulping in her sent again and again. "I needed you physically by my side. I'm so completely in love with you Ness. I can't live without you." He poured his heart out as they sat entwined securely in their own little private hideaway.

She listened, feeling the sensual rumble of his chest as he spoke. His warm skin heating her from within. She breathed him in and thought that she could never smell a better fragrance in the world than the pine and earth and manliness of him. Her Jacob.

"I know. It was the same for me. My soul was aching, missing half of its self." Renesmee leaned up to kiss him again. "I love you Jacob Black." They lay, wrapped around each other for several more minutes. Listening to each other breath, surrounding themselves in each other's light.

As they lay there, she began to feel him growing beneath her inner thigh where it draped over him. She wondered curiously, how long it would take him to be ready for round two. She unwound herself from him and raised up off the bed. "Do you think there'll be any hot water yet? I'd like to wash, and this time actually get around to using the soap before I collapse in a heap." Jake watched her well-rounded, firm backside swayed as she walked to the bathroom door. She turned and caught him staring at her. "Stop ogling my ass and come join me." She giggled as she dipped through the doorway.

oOoOoOo

The hot water had filled up. Jake enjoyed making sure Renesmee was indeed, very clean. He moved the soapy film over her body, revelling in the way his hands glided over her curves, again- much better than his fantasies. Renesmee wanted to give back to him some of the joy she had felt at his skilful hands, she wanted to repay the favour.

She moved to stand behind him, her hands slipped over his back, down to the firmness of his cheeks. She pressed her breasts into the hard muscles along his spine, the curve of her stomach arching into the small of his back. She reached her arms around him, her hands gliding across his stomach as she lowered them and grasped her lathered hand around his member, rolling her hands up and down his length.

She guided Jake and turned him so that his back was against the cool tile of the shower and she was working him from the front. His back was pressed along the wall, his eyes were closed and head was thrown back as he marvelled at her touch.

Ness reached her head up to lock her lips with his. Her tongue prodding and exploring while her hand never stopped its pumping movements. She let the spray of water wash the soap off his body before butterflying her way down his chest, over his abdomen until her lips met his hot shaft and she was kneeling beneath him.

His excitement mounted as she started to suck him, spinning circles with her hot wet tongue around his head. She gild her lips along his length with shocking precision and talent. Her own arousal an unexpected yet pleasing delight, she felt her sexual centre tingling and her pelvis was rocking unconsciously as she pleasured him. He let himself get lost by the feelings of pleasure her mouth gave him groaning with each movement. She replied with a muffled moan as she sunk her mouth further down along his manhood, wetting it as she gild up and down.

She placed her fingers at the base of his penis and stretched the skin tight flicking his frenulum with her tongue then took all of him in, right to the back of her throat. "Oh God Ness, stop, I'm gunna cum." He warned as he bucked his hips away from her removing himself from her mouth. He sunk down to his knees, his eyes burning with animal desire as she blazed back with equal visceral craving. "Turn around. I want to fuck you." He said, with a strong, sweet need. Her eyes widened, his assertive command frightened her a little but nowhere near as much as it's dominating assurance completely turned her on. She lifted up off her heels and turned as he knelt behind her.

The sight of her round firm buttocks and her feminine opening, blushing and welcoming had him gritting his teeth to stay controlled. He mounted and entered her with one hard thrust as she cried out in pleasure and pain. He calmed momentarily inside as she got re-accustomed to his size. She twitched her hips pressing back into him and then he started thrusting in and out again and again.

It didn't take long before Renesmee could feel her climax ascending as the new position rubbed and pressed in new places. She backed into him, meeting him stroke for stroke as he slammed his fullness into her. Jacob held her hips, his fingers dinging into her soft hips as he approached his peak. Renesmee felt him grow further inside her as her own pleasure surged.

They were both frenzied with pure animal like desire taking over them. The grunts and moans echoing off the steamy, wet tiled walls. Ness came suddenly, shaking with release as Jake dived in one final time, filling her, almost violently, with his molten seed. Both their cries of pleasure were loud, a much needed release after their last heavy conversation. Her pants continued as the effect of her orgasm continued to roll through her, seemingly like minutes later, her mind blank apart from the pure ecstasy she had experienced.

When they stilled, catching their breath, he lowered this chest against her back, his arms parallel to hers, reaching the floor. "Oh my god." She panted. "What the hell was that? That was amazing." _It was intense_. He nuzzled her neck, kissing along her shoulder blade. "That was you being an exceptionally good girlfriend and the alpha-male in me taking his mate." He arrogantly announced.

She laughed at his egotism, "Don't be such a douche." She angled her hips forward, as he exited her. "Ough that burns, I'm gunna be so sore tomorrow."

They stood and washed again, enjoying the intimacy of a post coital shower until the water turned cold again. Drying off and wrapping towels around their bodies, they lay back down together on the small bed, happy to rest and doze in each other's arms after their exertions.

It was mid-afternoon before they rose, hungry, relaxed and sated. "Do you want to take old Betsy for a joy ride?" asked Jake full of boyish enthusiasm as he threw a clean shirt over his head. "I'm starving though. I need to refuel after all that exercise. Keep my stamina up." He said cheekily.

"We better go then, God forbid you miss a meal you animal." she joked as she zipped up her boots and stood, taking him by the hand and leading him out the front door.

After stopping at a diner to pick up a late lunch. They spent the rest of the afternoon exploring the district in the car. Ness drove as she pointed out the different areas of her home town. They jumped a fence and ran, chasing one another through a lavender field. Jake stopped to pick a bunch of the herb flower, bunching up the stems and presenting them to Ness.

"My first bunch of flowers from a man. Thankyou." She said, kissing him for about the hundredth time that hour.

"I'll make sure you always have flowers Nessie. Always show you how much I love you."

She smiled, falling a little more in love with him each time he said stuff like that. "Oh I forgot to tell you. I kept that flower you left on my pillow that time. I'm keeping it pressed in a text book."

"What time?"

"That time I was a scared fool and told you I didn't have time to date." She shook her head, rolling at her eyes at her own stupidity. He had an alarmed look on his face, his face palling. Her heart dropped when she understood his expression. "You didn't give me that flower did you?"

He was silent, simply shaking his head. "How does he keep getting into you room?"

"We never used to lock the door that much back then. It didn't matter- I thought. Now though, I'm paranoid about security. I even got the locks changed just in case he had a key."

"Do you think he does?"

"I don't think so. It just made me feel a little safer."

"Nessie let me stay down with you. I want to help protect you. It kills me to drive away from you."

"I know." She wined, lacing his fingers with her own. "_Please_ understand why you can't. He gave _me_ a flower. He killed a bird and spread it along the bonnet of _your_ car. It's pretty obvious who he doesn't like. You have to say away. Please." Her eyes were pleading, glassy from the tears of concern that were threatening.

Knowing they were at a stalemate he sighed, and brought her in for a bone crushing hug. "I'll make sure you always have so many flowers from me that they'll cover your room, so there's no space for psycho stalker to put any." She smiled at his attempt to comfort her. She took him by the hand again and grasped the bunch of Lavender in her arms smelling them. "I don't need a whole room full. These are perfect." She said as she led him through the long grass, back to Betsy.

They stopped at a bar and grill in the main street for their evening meal, enjoying the live music from the house band. Shortly after they had finished eating, the music changed and staff began to rearrange the tables as a dance floor was created in the middle of the restaurant. Groups and couples began to arrive, seating themselves and enjoying after dinner coffee.

A middle aged couple were the first to get up, jiving to the old rock music. Soon, a younger couple stood up, they danced with skill, twisting and flipping, it was very good to watch. Before long most of the patrons and even some of the wait staff were dancing to the happy strains of the band.

Jake stood, taking Ness by the hand. "Care to dance my Love?" She smiled as she stood and let him lead her to the floor. They danced awkwardly at first. Neither of the young couple had danced with any intent before, but they attempted to copy some of the other dancers and soon they were swaying to a simple three step. Ness enjoyed the night thoroughly, and Jake had to admit he did too.

They continued moving together until the band announced the end of the evening, playing one last song. They stood arm in arm, wrapped around each other, Ness resting her cheek on his chest, Jake leaning into her head. Such a sense of rightness and belonging encompassing them both.

It was late by the time they drove home. They stopped and parked by an abandoned building a few blocks from the house. Ness dragged Jake into the back of Betsy and with misting windows and rocking suspension, they very thoroughly christened the back seat of that old car.

Yep, she was definitely going to be sore in the morning.


	22. Chapter 22 Wanted

**NB- to guest review Jane- thanks for the editing tip. I _definitely_ meant to have the spelling perfect but the dam computer spell check can be a bit_ defiant_ some times! :-) thankx**

**And Artee, dude you have gotta be patient. The stalked will be reviled but I don't think its going to happen for about ten more chapters. Don't hate me. Although I'd probably be yelling at the computer if I was reading this story with out knowing who the psycho is. But a girls gotta build a little suspense? Right?! **

**Thankyou to everyone who takes the time to review, I do a little dance every time I hear the ding of another email. (it's a sickness.)**

* * *

**I was umming and ahing about putting lyrics in this chapter, but I just couldn't keep them out. The song below has been swimming through my head for so much of this story I felt like I have to give it a mention. Turns out I put the whole thing in!**

**_Wanted_**** by Hunter Hayes- Can I suggest you play it as Ness starts to play, (you'll know the part.) Just pretend it's a girl singing though.**

* * *

**Wanted**

Renesmee organised for her and Jake to have an early Lunch with Rose and Em the next day. She'd had to warn Jake not to expect a barbeque steak though. The lunch went better than expected. Renesmee had been building the meeting up all weekend. She should have known that Jacobs's warm, open confidence would win them over instantly. He had stolen her heart, why not her foster parents too?

Rosalie was happy so long as Ness was happy and Uncle Emmitt, well, he just liked having a guy in the house that would talk sports and -as he put it- 'man' things with.

Over the years, even before Grand-mère Sophie had gotten sick, Rosalie had taken an interest in Renesmee's sports. As they sat around the table, Rose got up and returned with the scrapbook she had created. "Oh no, Aunt Rose." groaned Renesmee.

"Oh shush." She said. "I'm sure he'll want to see all your achievements sweetheart."

"Yeah I'm sure he will. It's my crushing embracement I'm worried about. Ever hear of a little mystery is a good thing?"

"Well now I _have_ to see it." Said Jake eagerly sitting up straight and rubbing his hands together. So Ness sat uncomfortably at the table as Rosalie painfully detailed all the photos and newspapers clipping she had lovingly arranged. And Jake loved every page of it. Reading every article, looking at every photo. Commenting on how beautiful she was even as an eleven year old.

Eventually, Ness relaxed enough to sit back and observe them happily chatting to one another as they bonded over a common love. _He_r. It occurred to Ness that this was as close as she was ever going to get to have an actual family. If Bella had been there too, there would have been every person she loved in the world sitting at that round kitchen table. A feeling of contentment passed through her. She couldn't imagine being much happier than she was at that very moment.

Before Jake and Ness left to go back next door, Rose called out. "Hang on a sec!" and she came back to the front door forcing a heavy black case into Renesmee's hands. "You need to take this sweetie. It's yours and you should play more. I know you have mixed feeling about it, but it's a part of your life. And all those parts- whether you like them or not- are what makes you, you. And I personally think this piece…" She tapped the guitar case. "…is the best bit of that crappy half of your life." She smiled at Ness, a proud motherly smile. They kissed cheeks and Uncle Em shook Jakes hand and the fledgling couple totted off arm in arm back to the house.

As they were about to walk through the front door of the small house, Jake bent suddenly and scooped Ness up, carrying her over the threshold. "Jake!" She squealed, as the case that was gripped tightly in her hand swung up and knocked Jake on the forehead.

"Ouch!" he said leaning his forehead down to rub it on Ness' arm, his hands were still full holding her. "I _was_ trying to be romantic. But this giant thing has kind of ruined it." He tilted his head to the case.

"Oh babe, it was romantic. But I think the whole threshold thing is meant to be for honeymoons or something."

"Well this kind of feels like a honeymoon to me." He looked in to her eyes, she could see her reflection in them and she knew the depths of his love.

She bit her bottom lip, leaning her head on to his strong chest, trying to think of something romantic to do for him. Suddenly, she realised what she wanted to do. She wanted to play for him. She hadn't brought her cello with her, so she couldn't play that. Her two options were the piano that sat in the corner of the living room and her father's old guitar in her hands. She hadn't played that piano for years, it was probably out of tune and she'd stopped doing exams for it in the ninth grade, gripping the handle currently in her hands tighter, she knew what instrument she'd use now and she knew exactly the song she would play.

Jake had continued to carry her through the house, still holding her, he made his way to the kitchen and opened the fridge with his foot. Ness couldn't help but laugh as he attempted to reach in to grab a snack. "You're such a cave man. Put me down Jake." He set her on her feet as he searched to cupboard for a plate. She held his wrist and pulled the dish from his hands and gently placed it on the counter. "Leave it. I want to show you something."

Jake looked at Renesmee inquiringly, sensing the quiet love emanating from her. He let her lead him into the living room silently, one hand in his the other grasping the ratty black case. She directed him to sit on the couch, he sat down, sinking into the old, brown, soft leather. Ness sat adjacent to him on the bench by the window. Even though they were sitting meters apart Renesmee's gaze was so strong that it burnt directly into Jake, his chest burned for his love for her. God, did he love her.

She fidgeted in her seat, her foot shaking. "I want to tell you how much I love you. I'm not very good at _saying_ these things but then I thought, I could just use someone else's words." She leaned over and opened the case, taking out an old wooden acoustic guitar. _Shit! Why am I so nervous_? She strummed a simple chord. Her hand stilling on the strings. Silence echoed around the house as she closed her eyes and took a deep calming breath. She opened her eyes and looked intently at Jake. "I want to play for you." She said simply.

She started carefully, watching her fingers as they transition through the chords, then she looked over at Jake and began to sing. "_You know I'd fall apart without you. I don't know how you do what you do. 'Cause everything that don't make sense about me, makes sense when I'm with you."_ She sang the first verse steadily her eyes still scorching into his. Jake felt his own chest grip like a vice inside him, it wasn't painful, but it was intense_. "Like everything that's green, Jake, I need you. But it's more than one and one makes two. So put aside the math and the logic of it. You gotta know you're wanted too."_ She had changed some of the words to make him know it was for him. He knew it. She was sing for him. _For me_._  
_She continued to sing however, with a little more waver in her sweet voice. Jake stood up and moved over to her as she continued. She was pouring so much emotion into the words, he was mesmerised, moved beyond belief and felt- in his entire being,- his sole altering love for her.

As she started to sing the chorus Jake knelt down in front of her, resting on his heels, her words reverberating around the old home. "_'Cause I wanna wrap you up. Wanna kiss your lips. I wanna make you feel wanted. I wanna call you mine. Wanna hold your hand forever and never let you forget it. Yeah I, wanna make you feel wanted_." He could see the tears threatening in her eyes as she continued.

_"Anyone can tell you you're handsome, and you get that all the time- I know you do. But your beauty's deeper than the muscles. And I wanna show you what I see tonight." _He grined as she smiled through her tears, chuckling as she sang.

As the song came to its crescendo, her tears of love began flowing freely down her face. Jakes eyes were brimming too, however, he calmly blinked them back_. "I wanna make you feel better_,_ better than your fairy tales. Better than your best dreams. You're more than everything I need. You're all I ever wanted. All I ever wanted." _

She started to stumble on her fingering, her voice breaking as she stubbornly continued to play. Jake couldn't help but smile at her tenacity as she ploughed through her sobs. By the end of the song she had stopped playing altogether, her broken heartfelt words coming out in a whisper. "_You'll always be wanted."_

After a quiet moment of just simply being in each other's presence, Jake gently lifted the acoustic out form her hands, placing it back in the box. He linked his hands with hers, their palms touching, the bands around their wrists connected. He knelt up tall and brushed his lips against hers. "Thank you. I don't know what else to say but, _thank you, _that was beautiful. You're beautiful. And… I love you." He looked in to her blurred eyes, the green so vivid in the afternoon light. Her pupils were contracting and dilating as she watched his. Her lashes were wet and clumping together in such an innocent way. She was letting him in. He saw right into her, the window into her heart, he saw his own soul in there.

He placed his hands either side of her face and wiped her tears away with his thumbs. He kissed her again, longer and harder. His mouth bruising in its passion. He stood her up and taking her by the hand, Jake led her into her room.

He stood with her in the middle of the bedroom. He carefully brushed his hands under the collar of her shirt. His touch eliciting a quiver of expectation. His hand came to the first button and slowly he undid each one, all the while looking into her eyes. With the shirt undone he slipped it off her shoulders and moved his hands down along her bare arms. His burning graze scorching a path along her skin, she could feel the heat of where his hands travelled.

He undid the button of her pants, lowering the zip. His hands ran along the inside if the waist band, his fingers burning along her hips and sliding over her bottom pushing the denim down. She stepped out of the jeans and reached her hands to his chest.

She paced her hands flat against his torso and stroked down until her fingers found the lower hem of his t-shirt. She grasped it and brought it up over him, his arms raising and then lowering as the shirt came off. She slowly undid his belt, letting it hang in front, the buckle making as faint tinkle sound as it shifted. She undid the buttons of his fly, on by one, painfully slow, then she coiled her fingers into the belt loops and eased the waistband over his hips. He stood on the leg cuffs to pull each leg out, still maintain eye contact.

She could feel the heat rolling of him in waves. Her mouth was parted, her eyes were wide as she begin to breathe heavily. He brought his hands to her back and unclasped her bra, sliding it off and letting her fall free. He looped his fingers into her underpants and slid them off. Still, without moving his eyes off hers, Jake guided Renesmee to the bed.

She lay back with her hair fanning over the pillow. Jake crawled up on to the bed with her. His knees either side of her thighs and his hands beside her shoulders. He knelt back and allowed himself to take in all her beauty, his eyes raked over her once only before he locked his gaze with hers again.

He bent in and kissed her, his lips were slightly parted, his pressure just right. He moulded them around hers with a steady kneading, his eyes finally closed when hers did. He fluttered his kisses over jaw, behind her ear, down her neck and along her shoulder. Eliciting a gentle sigh from her full lips.

He lifted her arm by the wrist and kissed the underside of her long bicep, flowing down to the pulse point and finishing in the middle of her palm. He moved to the other hand, kissing the palm and making his way up from the wrist his tongue licking the skin under the bracelet he had made for her, she never went without it. He skimmed his nose over her clavicle and zig-zagged along her chest. He grazed the underside her breasts and gave each nipple a soft kiss before moving down to her abdomen.

His breath on her waist sent a rolling contraction through her. Her body was his slave. He drifted over her heat and moved beyond, kissing the femoral point in her groin and licked down her inner thigh, blowing his heated breath along the moisture.

He butterflied over her calf and shin, lifting up her foot and placing a soft kiss in her arch. His caresses' sending a slow throbbing pulse through her being, converging in her centre. He lowered her leg and picked up the other, repeating the entire process in agonisingly slow reverse detail. As he traced his way up her leg he hovered above her sex, rubbing his nose in her crinkly hair but never lower.

He moved all the way back up to her mouth, kissing her leisurely, stoking the slow building fire he had been kindling. He broke off, looking into her eyes once more. "I hope you feel wanted too." He said in a throaty voice that ignited the burning ember in Renesmee like a breath of air. She swallowed hard looking at him in amazement. _Who is this sex god and what did he do with nineteen year old horny Jake?_

He ran his nose over her jaw, through her breasts and above her navel as he settled in between her legs. She sat up on to her elbows and marvelled at the sight of him between her legs. It turned her on even further. His hands ran up her legs and over her thighs as his tongue finally dipped into her. Tasting and savouring the saltiness. Ness let out a guttural moan as his tongue lapped her up. His hands opening her wider as he began to lick and suck her centre.

Renesmee had been hovering on the edges of nirvana, it didn't take long before she was gripping the sheets beneath her and calling out. Through her gasping breaths she cried. "Jake I need you, I need you _in_ me."

He lifted up and stretched out on top of her, his desire full already, he pushed himself into her depths as she called out his name. Her hands raking long scratches down his back as he thrust into her over and over again. Ness could feel her tension overflowing, it gushed out, rushing through her entirety as she began to incoherently scream.

Jake felt her climax around him, her squeezing muscle drawing him in further. He pushed into her harder and harder until her clinching reached its peak and he exploded forcefully inside of her as she milked him dry. He lay on top of her entirely spent as they both came back down from bliss.

"Yeah," She sighed breathlessly in his ear, nodding dreamily with her eyes still rolled back into her head. "I feel very wanted."

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**Well that chapter was really just one big lemon, wasn't it? Hope it wasn't too mushy for you all.**

**Peace out. M **


	23. Chapter23 Those boys have a 1 track mind

Later that Sunday afternoon, before the sun had set, Renesmee lay on the sofa in Grand-mère's house alongside Jake, they were pressed against each other. Ness was cradled in Jakes arms as they watched re-runs of Seinfeld, laughing at the hilarious dialog. Ness was relishing the normalcy of it, _Sunday afternoon, in our house, watching TV._ A simple life. A life she wanted. She didn't know when she'd started to think of it as _their_ house. She didn't care. She had given herself to that man; body, heart and soul. What difference were a few houses?

She was knocked out her revelations by a sharp banging on the door. "All right you two. That's enough fucking for one day. Put some pants on Jake and open the door." Came a voice from behind the door along with some idiotic laughing. "Well I guess my lift is here." Said Jake dryly as he got up to answer the door.

"Renesmee! Fully clothed and sober I see." Clipped Quill as he pushed his way past Jake.

"Yeah! Disappointed you don't get a show, you perv?" laughed Ness as she stood to greet Jakes friends. Paul and Embry stood at the door as Renesmee invited them in. She showed them around the house and brought out some snacks and sodas for the boys. They watched some TV and joked, mostly at Renesmee and Jakes expense.

Ness had been simmering some pasta sauce on the stove all afternoon, and was out of ear shot in the kitchen when Embry moved to sit next to Jacob. "So looks like you guys have set up a little love shack here?"

"It's not a 'love shack' this is her home, she's comfortable here." Jake chuckled.

"How _comfortable?_" asked Quill, never thinking far from his dick. Jake shut his eyes and shook his head, he wasn't going to be baited by his horny virgin friends. "Comfortable enough." Was all he'd say. Quill was smiling like a dickhead. "She's fucking hot Jake, please tell me you finally got to hit that pussy."

"Quill that's my girlfriend you're taking about."

"Yeah, your fucking _hot _girlfriend. Did you fuck her?" He asked from his seat on the floor by the couch, looking up at Jacob pleadingly. "Just tell me. Please." Jake stayed silent, trying his best to be a gentleman, he stared at the TV, struggling to keep the smug smile off his face. "Oh! You fucked her!" yelled Quill, pushing his leg with both hands.

"Shut up, ass-turd! She's just fucking there." Hissed Jake quietly, thumbing towards the hallway.

"Jake finally got his cherry popped!" whispered Quill, looking like he was so excited he was about to wet himself, or maybe he was about to jiz his pants instead.

Embry gave Jake a supportive slap on the back. "Congrats man."

It was weird. His friends were way too interested in his sex life, but it was hard for a guy to not want to brag, especial when it was about a girl as spectacular as Nessie.

Paul had been sitting on the single seat and leaned in closer. "Is she flexible? I bet she's flexible." He asked, his eyes half closing as he pictured Jacobs girlfriend in compromising positions. Jacob lifted his foot and gave Paul a not so gentle kick on the shins. "Dude! Can you not get a boner thinking about my girlfriend?" Paul just leered at Jake, nodding his smart ass head. "Yeah, she'd be as flexible as shit!"

"Did you see her boobs?" asked Quill. Jake just held up his hands in question, looking at his friend incredulously. "What kind of question is that, we didn't do it with our clothes still on Quill, if course I sore her boobs."

"Oh Yeah sorry, I didn't think about that." He turned around, kneeling at Jakes feet like a child asking for ice-cream. "But there nice boobs, aren't they?" He persisted.

"Oh man. Look, will you assholes shut up if I tell you that; yes, both Ness and I lost our virginity this weekend. She has an amazing set of tits, in fact, her whole body is spectacular. And none of you pervs are ever gunna see it or hear any sort of description from me. Fucking get your own girlfriends and bother them, will ya." He said laconically, getting up off the couch. "Now, I'm going to see if my _very_ fit, girlfriend needs a hand making supper."

As he stepped over Quill, kicking him a little as he did, Embry taped him on the hip. "Hey Jake." Jacob turned as he continued on. "How fit is she?"

Jake just laughed, shaking his head. _Dum-asses._ He couldn't help himself though, he threw the horny dogs a bone. He held up his hand giving them the bird as he walked away, then held up four of his fingers as he continued down the hall way to the sounds of laughter and acclamation.

* * *

They all piled around the old wooden table for an early evening meal. Renesmee revelled in watching them all, especially Jake, eat her food. Some people might have thought it stereotypical, but Ness enjoyed cooking. And she derived an instinctual pleasure in cooking for him- the beast of a cave man that he was.

Jake and his friends were ravenous as always, but none of the others had seen how much Ness could put away. "Jesus Renesmee, you eat as much as me!" Said Paul, he'd been eyeing off the bit that was left in the saucepan before Ren swooped in and scooped it out. She grinned at him, her lips saucy as she stuffed the fork into her mouth, purposefully slurping up a strand and making a smacking noise.

"I do a fuck load of exercise Paul, it gives me an appetite." She said licking the back of her fork.

"I bet you have a big _appetite_." Paul said suggestively. Ness frowned at him. She really had no idea how wide open she'd left herself. "A _fuck_ load hey?" he smiled attempting to look fascinated. "What kind of _exercises_ do you do exactly Ness?"

She looked at him sideways, a perplexed look on her face. "You know, the normal stuff. I run, do drills…, weights." She was shaking her head.

He was grinning at her like an idiot and she was totally missing whatever the joke was. "Weights?" he asked, his brows raising in interest. "Like clean and _Jerk_?" Paul asked, his lip twitching to hide a smirk as Quill choked on his soda, half spitting it onto the floor. Ness took a paper napkin as handed it to Quill, answering Pauls question in earnest. "Nah, I don't do jerk, I leave that to the guys. I tend to do more repetitions, see how hard and fast and how many I can go in a certain amount of time."

By this point Quill was on crawling on the floor wiping up his soda and Embry was rolling on the floorboards with him. "What?" she screeched. "I don't get it." She cried, exasperated.

Jake leaned over to her, rubbing his palm around her back. "You walked straight in to that one sweet heart."

"What _one_? What's so funny?" her hands out stretched in frustrated question.

Jake moved his mouth to her ear whispering. "He's teasing you about having an appetite in the bedroom."

Her head turned sharply to Jakes, her mouth popping as it formed a shocked 'o'. "I didn't mean it like that! I just meant I can keep up with all you guys when it comes to eating."

From somewhere on the floor Quill cackled again. "Yeah, eating Sausage!"

Ness buried her head in her hands groaning. "Do you guys find sexual references to _every_thing people say?"

Wiping a stray tear from his eye, Embry climbed back into his seat. "Pretty much. No conversation is safe." He said, trying to hold in his laughter. "You should hear it when we watch the cooking channel. All that sausage and stuffing and succulent, juicy breasts."

All three of Jakes nineteen - going on _nine_- year old friends started howling like a pack of hyenas again.

Jake couldn't help but laugh a little at their antics, poor Ness was an easy victim for their jokes. But his heart wasn't really in it tonight. His mind was fixed on the clock and their approaching departure. She was going in one direction and him another.

It went against every fibre in him. But _Lord_ was she a stubborn red head? Insisting in keeping up this, '_No coming to Seattle. Don't upset the stalker'_ idea. They agreed to meet as often as they could, here at her house. They'd have next weekend but then she was booked for a further two weeks, heading to Pullman for another invitational meet.

They sat at the table for a little while longer until, as recompense for their vulgarity, Ness made the boys do the dishes. As they wiped and put the last of the dishes away, night time settled over the house and Embry suggested they start to head back home.

_Home _thought Jake, his home was where ever she was. He thought about the weekend they had just shared here in the house of her childhood, it was most likely the best two days of his entire life.

The sex had been mind-blowing. But more so, being with her all day long, her opening up, kissing her before they fell asleep at night and then waking up with her body pressed against the next morning. That was his idea of home.

Of course, La Push would always be his first home, the land of his people. But Jake felt that this house, this old, well lived in, well-loved house, it could easily be his home. Maybe one day. But as long as he had her by his side.., anywhere could be home.

Embry, Paul and Quill made their way to Paul's car, Quill making some sort of comment about hopping her _appetite_ hadn't returned cause Jake couldn't stay here _eating_ all night. Ness just shook her head, ignoring the unsubtle douche.

Jake stood hovering over Ness as she pulled the door closed, locking the deadbolt key. The sound of the latch falling resounded through them both, bringing the eventuality of their parting to a sudden upsetting reality.

With her back to him, still facing the door, Jake leant over Ness, brushing his lips over her neck, behind her ear. "I'm going to miss you so much." He said, his breath hot on her skin in to cold night air.

The temperature had dropped significantly and Renesmee could see the clouds of steam her accelerated breath made. She felt cold all the way to her bones. She turned, burying her head into his jacket, her hands wrapping around him. She let his warmth envelope her, she memorised the feeling of him around her, the way her body moulded to his and the feeling his hands gave when they held her tight. "It's only a week this time." She said, attempting to assure herself more than him.

"But that's five good night kisses and five mornings waking up in your arms that I'll miss out on." He retorted as he grasped her face between his warm hands. "I don't think I'm going to wait for Rachel to finish school before I go to Seattle. I'm going to have to find a job soon, really soon and then move. Then we can see each other whenever we like." He said as he peppered kisses across her cheeks and the bridge of her nose.

"Ok. I'll ask around for you." She said as she kissed him back. "We just have to get through the next few weeks then its spring break and then I go down to USC then Stanford."

She paused, biting her lip. "Jake, I want you to come down with me for the whole week. The team has accommodation booked at the campus but maybe we could get a hotel? Order room service? We could go to Disneyland? And just hang out in San Fran." she said a little nervous to be suggesting a naughty spring break vacation.

"I thought there'd be no point in me going down? You said you had training camps all week?"

"No, the camps only for three of the days and all my nights will be free." She curled her delicate fingers around her chin and tapped her forefinger against her lips, looking up to the sky. "I wonder what I could do with all those free nights?" she asked suggestively, a sparkle in her eye as she ran her tongue along the edge of her upper teeth.

Jake groaned and held her by the hip pulling her in to him. "You are a very naughty girl Renesmee Masen. But, when you put it like _that_… I'll _have_ to come. I'll make sure I bring some scrabble or something to keep us occupied." He laughed.

They kissed long and drawn out, their tongues searching each other's. All Ness could fell was Jakes heat. Her body on fire as his fingers burnt her skin at each place they touched.

They were broken out of there embrace by an inpatient honking of the horn. Paul wound down his window yelling out, "Get a room already. Let's go Jake, I've got work tomorrow." Jake turned back to Ness and walked her over to her car, opening the door for her as she sat down.

He leaned into the cabin as she started the car, getting the heating going. "Promise me you'll call Bella and get her to meet you in the car park?"

"I promise. I will."

"And make sure you call me when you get in. I want to make sure you get in ok."

"I will. I know."

"Are you getting the ferry? Don't talk to any one ok." He brushed his hand through his hair, letting out a shuddering breath. "Oh God. I should have driven you back. Or at least made you drive in the day time. What was I thinking? I'll just come with you now." He was panicked. All the horrible possible scenarios running through his mind.

Renesmee gripped his face with both hands. His stubble rough and oh so sexy against her hands. "Stop Jake. It's ok. I'm going to be ok. I won't to talk to anyone. I'll stay in my car. I have a full tank of gas and my cell is charged. I'll get Bella to meet me in the parking lot. It'll. Be. Fine. Relax. You have work tomorrow. Go." she said pushing his head back out the door. "I'll be fine."

He heaved a great sigh his eyes telling her he wasn't happy. He kissed her a final time saying "I love you." as he stepped back and closed the driver's door.

"I love you too." She said and she put the car in reverse and backed out onto the road.

She was putting the car in drive, as Jake ran over to the car, tapping on the window. Renesmee roll it down, looking up at him with sad smiling eyes. "I love you. Just in case you forgot." He said smiling as he lent in and kissed her again. He stood back up and reached his hand to the door frame, pressing on the internal lock button.

With a resounding click he said. "Keep it locked and don't wind it down for anyone."

"Bye Jacob." She called facetiously as she rolled up the window. Renesmee blew him a kiss through the glass as she drove away.

He turned to walk back to the car so they could start traveling home. He missed her already. He felt the crushing ache in his chest as she drove off with half of his heart. He was homeless with out her.

* * *

**I had a lot of fun writing that chapter. It's great to let go of my potty mouth with the boys dialogue. I think guys gossip more than girls and, as much as Jake was trying to be the gentleman, he couldn't help but give a few juicy details to his friends.**


	24. Chapter 24 Hot Obsession

**A bit of insight into the stalker's obsession in the first half of this chapter. I freaked myself out when I wrote it. It was late at night, the kids were sleep upstairs and my husband was away for work. Every noise I heard outside had me freaking. So I just stayed up until the early hours of the morning typing until I was too tired to care about being scared. Great logic. But anyway, this is the result. Enjoy. **

* * *

He watched as she sat in her car, listening to the music from the radio. The monotonous hum of the ferry engines loud in his ears as they travelled West across Seattle Harbour.

She'd arrived back at campus last weekend with the old aqua car. He thought it was a nice colour, it reminded him of her eyes. He told her as much in the note he'd left for her on her windshield.

She'd brought on old guitar case back to the dorm too. He'd never seen her play, he didn't even know she could. It didn't surprise him. She was incredible.

He imagined her hands as they strummed the strings. Her hands moving up and down, the other hand winding around the neck. He wanted her hands around _him_.

Seated in his darkened car he reached into his pants. Pleasuring himself as he watched her now and thought about what it would be like when they were finally together.

He thought about how much he'd been able to see her this week. She'd been busy, spending a lot of time in the library and at the track. She'd even done an extra platies class.

He didn't like it when she trained so much, it didn't leave her enough time to relax. She looked relaxed now, happy even. He wanted to know what was making her so happy_. _He wanted it to be him making her happy.

As they approached Bremerton, he saw her lift her phone to her ear. Someone was calling her. She was smiling. He loved her smile. He saw how she spoke with animated gestures, laughing at whatever was being said. He wanted to make her laugh too.

He daydreamed about how her beautiful smile would look when she knelt down wrapping her lips around his woman-maker.

The ferry came to a stop and the large front ramp lowered. He watched as she hung up the phone and began to drive off the ship. He followed behind her in his own car for over an hour until she turned into a town.

Her home town, he thought, she's visiting her parents. He'd always wanted to meet her parents.

She pulled into the driveway of a small wooden house just as another car pulled in behind.

He knew that car, he never wanted to see that car again. He had told him to go away!

She opened the boot and pulled out her overnight bag and a few bags of groceries.

He watched as the boy greeted her, holding out a bunch of flowers. He kissed and held her and then scooped her up and carried her up the front steps. He watched as they disappeared through the front door.

He was still waiting and watching when they came out of the house two hours later, dressed in stylish clothes. Her hair was bouncing in those pretty ringlets against the brown leather jacket she had on, she was squeezed into skin tight jeans and had brown high heel boots over the top.

He liked it better when she wore a dress.

They walked across the lawn and to the front entrance of the newer two storey house next door. There was a new looking contractor's truck in the driveway, a ladder and silver tool boxes in the back. A giant bear of a man opened the front door of the house, he looked to be in his thirties, he greeted her with a brotherly kiss and hug, and he shook the boys' hand. A tall, blond, tanned, Barbie doll woman appeared in the door way next, she kissed them both on the cheeks the way they do in Europe and Latin countries.

The bear-man held on to Barbie and then they all went inside. The front door closing behind her.

He got out of the car that he had parked a few houses up the road and he walked across to the little house. He stepped up onto the front porch looking through the front window. The window wasn't locked so he let himself in.

He stepped into the living room looking around. The living room was simple, a couch and a TV, a desk with a curved lid, a brown wooden upright piano in one corner and in the other, a wood and glass display case with crystal vases, pewter goblets and china knickknacks displayed on the transparent shelves.

He stepped quietly down the hallway to the kitchen, it was simple and neat. A bowl of fruit sat in the middle of the table. He picked off some grapes, eating as he moved back along the hall.

He walked into the main bedroom, the bed was made and the dresser was barren, bar an old polished silver hand mirror and brush the lone adornments of the table. It looked unlived in.

He went through an adjoining door that led to a bathroom.

Droplets of steam were still on the mirror, the rough circular outline of where it had been rubbed dry. A makeup bag sat open on the bench, brushes and lip gloss tumbling out, two toothbrushes sat in a glass by the sink.

He skulked thought to the next room. He'd found what he was looking for.

Her room.

He walked in, confidently flicking on the light.

There was a simple white bed against the far wall, the sheets were in disarray.

The room smelt like sex.

His jaw clenched. The idea of her being tainted by another man making him sick.

She'd ruined herself.

He was livid.

His breath was tight in his chest, his fists balled up by his side.

He turned to the desk on the other side, there was a crystal vase with roses in them and on the shelf above, there were sporting trophies neatly lined up.

_She doesn't put my flowers in a vase. Always running, always training! No time for anything else! _

In his rage he swung his arm, imagining it was _his _face, he knocked the vase into the corner, it shattered into tiny crystal shards on the floor, he stomped his boot into the petals. Then he swung his arm back, batting the golden plastic awards off the shelf. They landed with an artificial ting onto the floor.

His eyes scanned across the desk, landing on a flier for the Seattle philharmonic orchestra. He paused and breathed out his anger, his reactions flipping dramatically. He relaxed at the thought of her playing. His emotions softening.

He'd watched her play, her delicate fingers sure in their placement as they stepped over the strings. He liked it when she played. She was good. He liked the way her body moved as she fell deep in to the emotions of the piece.

She didn't play enough anymore. She should play more.

He wanted to let her know that.

He took down the flyer and turned it over to the blank side, scribbling his love letter. Pining it back up, he exited the house.

She'd understand, she was so kind, he didn't mean to make her house messy, he loved her. She would understand the note, he was the only person she needed, she didn't need the Indian_._

He'd better leave her alone if he knew what was good for him.

Good for both of them.

-o~O*O~o-

After a delicious meal and a comfortable evening of talking at Em and Rose's place, Jake and Ness made their way back home. Jake had his hands under her jacket, his fingers tracing the outline of her bra, his tongue tracing the lines of her ear as she opened the front door. She turned as they entered the living room, her eyes blazing with a sassy desire. "Catch me!" she called as she jumped up into his arms, her legs wrapping around him. Her mouth came down on to his, demanding, probing. His breath tasted sweet after the pear from desert. Wrapped around him, Ness started to unbutton Jakes shirt as he kicked the front door shut from behind. Her hands ran along the hard lines of his chest, never getting enough of him, never enough. They kissed deep and long as Jake walked into the bedroom, dumping her onto the mattress as she pulled him down with her.

She finished undoing his shirt and pushed it back over his shoulders, massaging the swelling muscle on his arms. Her hands moved quickly to his pants as he roughly pulled her jacket off, winding his hands at the base of her shirt and pulling it up. Their kiss broke off to get the shirt over her head. Ness opened her eyes and was distracted by a glimmer of shiny gold on the far side of the floor. _What's my trophy doing on the floor?_ Her hands froze and she surveyed the shelf on the wall, the little tokens of her track and field achievements toppled over and broken. Then she saw the vase lying broken on the floor, the flowers almost pulp. "Jake." She said her voice soft and ominous. "Mmmm?" he sounded, continuing to kiss along her collar bone reaching behind her to undo her bra. She arched her back preventing him from getting it. "Jake, look." She said motioning to the shelf.

He looked to where she was pointing and stood abruptly from the bed. She had an unnerving shiver spread over her arms as she scrambled to put her top back on. He walked over to the self and saw the note on the pin board. "He's been in this room." He said as he did up his pants. "Stay here." Whispered Jake, as he peeked into the bathroom, then made his way through the house, looking for the intruder. Jake came back into the room within a minute, after having flicked on each light on as he passed. Both picked up their phones, Renesmee calling Rose and Emmitt, Jake calling the police.

An hour and a half later, the family were sitting around the old kitchen table, sipping some calming tea. Ness was still a bundle of nerves. "I can't believe he came here. He must have followed me. No where's safe, is it?" Jake had his arm around her as she leaned in to him for support. "Aunt Rose, is it ok if we stay at your house tonight? I'm a bit too freaked-out to stay here."

"Sweet heart, you are our _daughter_. Our house is your house. There's no need to even ask. Of course you can stay." Soothed Rose. Gently patting Renesmee on the wrist, her stiff frozen hands enveloping the warm mug of tea. "Get your things and we'll head back."

"I'll get it." Said Jake as she started to push back her chair. He stood and lightly pushed her back to her seat, his hands by both of her shoulders, then he headed to the bedroom to re-pack both of their bags. Em went back through the house shutting all the windows and checking all the other doors were locked and they all exited via the front door, locking it from the outside.

It felt like a perfect part of her life had been contaminated. This was her escape. The place she could come to just be _her_. The home she could leave her troubles behind. The one place she could come to and not feel scared. That place was gone. She was scared.

Jake was asleep next to her, his enormous arm holding her securely. Even in his sleep he was trying to protect her. The problem was, no one knew who she needed protecting from. She's been tossing and turning for hours. She turned to look at the alarm clock on the side table. The bright red numbers burning in the shadowy night, _three seventeen._ Ness sighed and wriggled out of Jakes arms, she sat on the side of the bed and gently stood up not wanting to wake him. She quietly padded down the hall to the bathroom and washed her face with the cool clean water. She sat on the edge of the tub, staring out the window in to the night sky where she could see the waning gibbous moon shining. A soft luminous light hitting the tiles.

Renesmee stood and walked to the window, looking out over the backyard of the home next door. A flicker of light coming from the front of the house caught her eye. She froze, her hands gripping the sill so tight her nails dug into the paint. She was waiting to see another flash of light, a person even. The thought gripped her insides with a white hot terror. She saw another flicker of light, but it was strange, it wasn't the cool white light shining in a straight line that she expected from a flashlight, but a red orange, animated light, its reflection dancing on the side windows. There was a noise coming from the house also, a low drone she couldn't place. Then suddenly she realised there was smoke billowing out of the roof line, into the night sky. Her home was in fire.

She tuned form the window and ran down the hall screaming. "Jake! Wake up! The house in on fire." She scrambled, turning on the light as she reached for her phone dialling 911. "Emmitt! Rose! Wake up!" She cried, her voice pleading as she ran back into the hall down, to their bedroom. "Next door!" she yelled into the darkness of their bedroom. "Her house!"

Jake was pulling his sweater on as he came out of the bedroom. "Ness!" he yelled. "Stay here. Don't you dare go outside? You hear me? We'll go and see what's happening. You just call the fire brigade." He didn't wait for a reply before he ran down the stairs with Em on his heels. Rose came out of the bedroom, her dressing gown hurriedly thrown over her shoulders. Renesmee spoke to the emergency operators as the two women went down stairs to watch from the living room window. Rose blocking Ness from going outside until it was safe.

Jacob sprinted through the front door and was hit by the cold air of the night. In bare feet, he ran across the cold dewy grass to the front porch of the ignited house. He stopped when he saw the plumes of black thick, toxic smoke that was billowing out from the broken glass into Nessie's bedroom. "This is no random electrical fire." He said to Emmitt. The both turned to scan the outside of the house. The street was deserted in both directions. Jake made a circle of the house and Em went around the opposite side, meeting by the back door. "Do we try and go in?" asked Jacob.

Em shook his head. "Hell no! We'll just get ourselves killed or burnt." He cocked his head to the side, getting a better listen. "I can hear the sirens coming now anyway." The men doubled back to the front of the house, and motioned to Rose and Ness to come out.

Renesmee sprinted out the front door and ran towards the house. Jake had to use all his speed and force to catch her before she tried to go inside the burning building. She was screaming wildly, kicking her legs and struggling as Jacob held her back. His arms wrapping around her torso trapping her arms. Her elbows digging wildly into his chest and stomach. "All her things! I have to get them. Let me go Jake!" she screeched.

"Stop Ness. You can't, you'll get burnt. Stop." He begged. His words coming out in jerks as she smacked against his chest.

"Nessie. Stop. It's not safe. Let the firefighters do their job." Cautioned Emmitt, his hand holding both of hers together as he hunched down to look into her eyes. "Stop Renesmee. Your hurting Jacob."

Those words brought her out of her psychosis. She didn't want to hurt Jake.., ever. Her body stilled, the sounds of her breaths masked by the sounds of the hungry fire consuming the house.

The first fire truck arrived and the four by-standers were ordered to step back. They watched, along with several of the other neighbours who were nosily surrounding the spectacle. Some of the emergency workers donned there breathing apparatus and others hooked up the hoses. The two front rooms were alight now. They all jumped in fright as the night air was shattered by the sudden explosion of glass from the other front window. Sharp tongues of flames flicked out the now open space.

Renesmee buried her face into Jacob's chest. His hands fisted in her hair holding her to him. She began to shudder in his arms, her hacking sobs soaking through his pullover. The four of them stood in the frigid night, bare foot and thinly dressed as the rescuers doused the inferno. After what seemed like hours but what was most likely minutes, the flames retreated, the smoke reduced to the occasional thin stream and several firemen began to exit the building.

Ren shivered in the cold air. Her thin sleep shirt and pants not nearly enough for the bitter March night. "Your cold." Said Jake rubbing his hands up and down her arms. "Let's go inside and get some warmer clothes on."

"No. I want to stay here." She said, her eyes glassy as they stared out the blackness of the interior of the house.

"At least go get some shoes on. You'll get sick." Protested Jake.

Rose cut in. "I'll go get it Jake. You stay here with her." He turned to look at her over his shoulder. A silent exchange of gratitude and more so, a resolve, a pledge, to protect the girl he held flowing between them.

-o~O*O~o-

Somewhere in the confusion of fire trucks and police cars, a plain white car that was parked a few houses up the road started it's engine and with headlights still off, turned and drove out of the town. The residents of the street none the wiser.

-o~O*O~o-

The sun was rising over the Pacific North West when the last of the detectives and fire investigators left. Once again, they found themselves sitting around the kitchen table holding mugs of calming tea. The tea wasn't working.

"I don't care what you say now Ness I'm not letting you out of my sight until this psycho is behind bars or dead. Preferably dead." Instructed Jake, expecting an argument form her. All he got was a small nod.

"I know." She said. Her voice a fragment of her broken self. Her eyes were rimmed red. Her hair matted with ash. Her face and hands grubby from searching through the burnt vestiges of the house after the firemen had allowed it. The evidence of her tears marking a negative image down her cheeks, the white lines twisted against the charcoal.

"I think you need to consider deferring school for the rest of semester, love. At least move out of the dorms." Suggested Rose, her anxiety etched on her face.

"I'm not deferring." She sniffled shaking her head. Rose was about to refute, but Ness held her hand up, adding. "But I will move. I've been thinking. One of the properties I inherited was a house in Redmond. I don't know what it's like, I'm not sure if it has tenants in it, but," She shrugged." I'll see if we can move in there." She looked over to Jacob. "That way we can be together and if Rachel likes it she can move in too after she graduates."

He was nodding, his brow arched. "The property's in Redmond?" he asked incredulously. "Are you kidding? Rachel will have a heart attack! That's like, walking distance from where she wants to work." He rested his elbow on the table and lifted Renesmee's chin with his fingers. He looked down into her blood shot eyes. "We'll move across the country if it means you're safe Nessie. Whatever it takes. Ok?" She shut her eyes as the fatigue washed over her.

She leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder. "I love you." She murmured, all her feelings rolled into those three little words. She sat back up and sucked in a revivifying breath. "Well, I guess I better ring the insurance company now." She sat higher in her chair, stretching her tired muscles. "At least it's not quite as bad as it looked." She was shaking her head at the memory. "All that smoke and flames…" She said, her words tapering off.

Em nodded his agreement. "I'd say there wasn't too much structural damage to the front rooms. We'll see what the engineering report says. It's still gunna need a lot of work, but it'll be liveable again. Don't worry." He said standing up, kissing the top of her head. "We'll turn it back into the home it used to be once more. I promise you that little Red Robin."

Ness rested quietly, thing about Emmits words. _Home. I don't really have one._ There were houses she was familiar with, but Ness knew it was the people who made a house into a home, not the walls itself. She remembered the feeling of home as a child. Sometimes in a shelter, sometimes in a daily hotel, sometimes in a doorway. But the Child Renesme felt at home wherever she was because she had her parents, or at least one of them, with her. She didn't know they were crappy parents. She loved them the way all children love there mummy and daddy and it made her feel at home. Now however, she had a very different feeling towards the departed individuals who she simply shared genetics with.

She thought about the place she had called home for a large portion of her life. Almost eight years. Grand-mere was gone and so too now was her house. The atmosphere of home that was lingering there, disappearing with the flames.

She looked around at the sharp modern kitchen she sat in now. The cupboard doors a high gloss, clean white contrasting with the charcoal benches and chrome fixtures. As much as she had tried to let it be, this wasn't her home. Renesme knew she wasn't being fair to her foster parents when she so easily discredited their house as her home. They had given of themselves so freely. She loved them, in her own way, but Ness had been on the verge of adulthood when she come to live with them. She hadn't needed them to be surrogate parents emotionally, so instead, she had two very giving and nurturing older siblings or uncles or aunts or confidants or something to that accord. There was always a silent battle for them asking to accept more of their love and care and Ness never quite giving them what they wanted.

She sat, staring at the dregs of her Mint and Lavender tea, swirling around the bottom of the mug in her hands. Jacob placed a loving arm around her shoulder. "You ok?" he asked quietly. Wanting her to let him in again like she had last week.

She looked over to him and nodded, her eyes closing as she did. "I'm just tired." She explained, "And I wondering where I'll be in years from now? Will I ever have a home?" she asked, trying to hide the self-pity in her voice as it broke as she talked.

"Where you'll be," He said, giving her shoulder a little reassuring shake. "Is right here, by my side. Together Ness, we'll make our _own_ home." Jacob pulled her in closer as she lay her head on his chest as they sat side by side. "You know how they say home is where the heart is?" he asked oratorically. "Well, you've got mine and I've got yours, so that means our home is with each other. He can't scare me off that easily my love. I'm not going anywhere. My home is right here with you. And I want you to feel that you're at home so long as were together."

She smiled as she pressed her face into his shirt, inhaling the pine and Earth sent mixed with the ash.

The smell of him.

She was home.

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**So did the first bit get your skin crawling? or am I just a pansy-ass sook?**

**Thank you for all the reviews. I do my best to reply to them all, if I haven't, sorry, I'm not dissing you, it's just an oversight or I can't cause you reviewed as a Guest.**

**I'm going to do my best to update two more chapters before Christmas. So we'll get a bit of yellow happiness in the next few! Yeah**

**Aratee and Jane (guest) that should light up your Christmas tree!**


	25. Chapter 25 Together

**This chapter is a moving forward kind of one. A filler, where not much happens emotionally but it's necessary for the story. But if I'm doing fillings, then I hope you enjoy the lemon filling I made at the end. :-)**

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It turned out that the house in Redmond was a five bed, three bath, gargantuan. It had been vacant for almost six months and Renesmee and Jacob organised to move in that week. They ended up staying the next night at Rose and Ems house too. Ness making phone calls and organising the insurance, all the while finishing assignments and studding for mid-term she had that week.

At Emmitt's instance, she agreed to leave most of the rebuild decisions to him. He was one of the only building contractors in town, so the odds were that his company would end up getting the insurance contract anyway. It made sense that if Em was on site or next door to the site every day that he make the decisions in regard to building materials and Ness trusted Rose to guide him in the decorative side of things .

They were able to salvage quite a bit form the longstanding home. The back half of the house had only been damaged by the dark smoke and much of the contents in the home were still useable and just need a bit of a clean-up. The old kitchen table that she loved was piled into Emmitt's pick-up, so to, was the large old solid wooden bed from the main bedroom, though the mattress had gotten wet and needed replacing. The plates and cutlery from the kitchen and the washing machine and drier were salvageable too and were added to the pile of belongings Renesmee and Jake would take with them.

Jacob called his boss in La Push after catching a few hours sleep. Explaining to him that he wouldn't be in on Monday, and explaining that, in fact, he was moving to Seattle and wouldn't be back in at all.

His boss had taken it quite well after Jake had explained the circumstances around the sudden move. He had a daughter that was studding interstate somewhere. Jake figured he was picturing his own daughter being followed and was happy for Jake to be the protective boyfriend, 'cause that would be what he'd want for his little girl.

Jacob had to explain to Billy what was going on too and later in the afternoon he drove the two hours back to the Reservation to tell his dad he was moving out of home. Billy was so supportive. He knew Jake was leaving in the June any way. So he said 'what was a few months early going to make a difference?' Jake spent the evening with his father enjoying a microwave dinner and watching football with his old man. He slept in his childhood bedroom for the very last time. He was moving out of home tomorrow.

The next day Jake caught up with Embry and Quill and said his good byes to a lot of his other school friends. He drove over to Forks and said goodbye to Charlie too. That man was like a second father to him.

By lunch time, he returned to the little red house in La Push to find Billy sorting through the linen cupboard having already half filled up a box of household things that he didn't need, to give to Jacob. Jake packed up his clothes and some of the stuff in his room also. Making sure to wrap the framed photo of him and Ness in a towel so as not to break it.

As he looked around his now bare room he had some mixed feelings. He was excited to be starting a new life, especially with Renesmee. But he had to admit, he was going to miss the familiarity and security of this home. He wasn't just saying goodbye to his dad and all his friends. He was saying good bye to his childhood.

He was finishing packing the car, just about to leave when he ran back into the house, into his room and took down the wolf picture that hung by his window. It had been there since he was a baby and he thought it would be a nice connection between the old and the new. He left the crumpled poster that was stuck behind his door however. He had his own personal sporting pin-up, in the flesh and now, he was ready make a home with her. He daydreamed about _pinning_ her to the back of their new bedroom door. He got a little simmer of anticipation as he realised they were going to be sharing a bed every day. They could make love every night, but even better, she would be in his arms every morning. And if she was up for it, they could do it again in the morning too, because he was always gunna be up for it with his biking model woman.

-o~O*O~o-

It was evening and raining, in true Washington fashion, by the time Jake got back to Sequim. Ness met him on the porch as he bounded up out of the rain. She wrapped herself around him, squeezing him as hard as she could. "I missed you." He squeezed her back, felling his heart relax as it reunited with its other half. "I missed you too baby." He sighed a soft contented sigh as they stood on the porch, arm in arm listening to the soothing pater of the rain and felling the comforting warmth of each other's presence.

By the time Monday rolled around, they were a little more relaxed but still cautious as ever as they made their way to their new home. Making sure they weren't being followed by _him._ Whoever he was.

Jake left his car at Rose and Ems place and drove with Ness in hers. Spring break was starting the following weekend and he'd pick the rabbit up then.

It was just after lunch on the big moving day and they were diving through Settle in Betsy, his hand was in hers as it rested on her knee. The window was down and Red Robin was enjoying the felling of her hair in the wind. Her thoughts were excited and content instead of tense and afraid for a refreshing change. It felt good to let it all go for a few minutes. She was singing happily to the radio when he interjected. "I just thought of something."

"What?" she asked looking over at him and counted her blessing once again that they had not been sleeping in that front bedroom that night. The thought of Jake being injured or worse, was too much for her to bare. So she focused on his amazing eyes as they smiled at her right now instead.

"We're moving in together." He said in a matter of fact way.

She hadn't even thought of it like that. It was just a given, Jake wouldn't leave her side- she didn't want him to- and he couldn't move into the dorms, so they just got their own place. Together.

"We are, aren't we?" she realised. "Is that ok?" she asked, knowing it was probably too late to back out but asking all the same. They'd actually only been going out for just over three months, but they were so attached to each other, it felt like they'd known one another their whole lives. It was a massive step they were taking and she realised, with some concern, it was as a direct reaction to the stalker. Even so, she was very happy about the idea of living with Jake, she only hoped he didn't feel pressured or worse still, end up regretting moving so quickly.

Jake cocked his to the side, looking at Ness like she was crazy. "It's better than ok babe. It's perfect. I mean, the reason this is all happening so fast if far from perfect, but you and me… under the same roof every night, in the same bed every morning. It's my idea of a perfect life."

Placated, she lent her head against his shoulder as they continued, her hand and arm winding along his, her fingers enjoying the swell of his hard bicep. "Me too babe. Me too." She breathed in his smell, of pine and Earth and man. She felt right, she felt loved, she felt whole. "I love you." She sighed rubbing her head against his arm.

"I love you too Ness."

They pulled up at their new house, after a quick stop at the solicitors to get the keys and sign some paperwork. Emmitt and Rose were catching a later ferry so they were about an hour behind Ness an Jacob. It was just the two of them for now. Ness had her newly acquired key in hand as they both got out of the car, staring up at the beautiful house before them. It was a slightly older _modern_ home, built in the seventies or early eighties. But it was obvious that it was well made, even to the untrained eye.

There were a myriad of roof lines, the tiles a slick dark grey slate. The main gable reaching high up above the second story. There were large bay windows on both levels, the outside walls a natural sandstone. There was a huge double wooden door at the front and a plaque hanging by the entry. Ness could see a three car garage to the side and cobble stone driveway and path bordered with box hedges and tall reaching deep green conifer trees. They were both checking the number on the letterbox, convinced they had the wrong house. This house could have featured in 'House and Garden' in its day.

Jake took Renesmee's hand and they walked up to the front door. Ness read the Plaque, '_Rouge-Gorge Maison' _and gasped, she ran her fingers over the warm copper in the simple wooden frame.

"I guess this is the right address then." He exclaimed. "Are you named after this house? Or is the house named after you?" asked Jake.

"I don't know." She replied. "It literally translates to 'House of the Red Robin'. I guess my grandmother thought it was a little joke that my surname is Masen. This plaque is old too, maybe older than this house."

"Well, now you know it was more than just your hair that got you the nick name."

Ness was nodding, biting her lip to fight back the tears.

She was sick of crying and this was a happy moment. Ness had loved her beloved Great-grandmother's whity sense of humour. The fact that the old woman had seen a connection with Ness to this house made it special, Renesmee was going to take it as a good sign. A happy omen.

She sorted through the keys in her palm until she found the one that looked like it would fit. She put it in and turned the lock. Before she could push it open, Jake had swept her up into his arms. "If we're moving in together the least I can do is carry you over the threshold. Welcome home." he said as he pushed the door open with his foot and stepped through the doorway.

The light was filtering in through the open curtains sending beams of sunlight across the room, the dust motes dancing in the rays. Jake placed her back on her feet and she moved down a small flight of tiled stairs leading to the rear of the house.

The short stairwell opened to a large modern kitchen with a marble bench top island standing to the right. Big six-burner stove she eyed with excitement. To the left a wall and door leading to the garage. Beyond the kitchen was a space for a table, a lounge and TV area leading to a deck out back behind. A brick fireplace sat to the left of the main room. The walls were painted a soft light brown with sharp white gloss accents around the skirts. Cream coloured tiles ran through the lower level of the house, as too the mezzanine level by the front door they had entered from. They wondered through the house, hand in hand and went back up to the entrance level to find a bedroom and bathroom to the right of the entrance with a small study nook to the side. Their voices echoing around the empty house as they oohed and ahhed.

Jake led her upstairs to see the other bedrooms, it was simply laid out. There were three good sized rooms on the front side of the house. The other side of the hall was the bathroom and the main bedroom. _Our room. _Ness walked in ahead of Jake. Her eyes looking over to a second doorway and she disappeared though it. Jake strolled over the large window at the rear of the house, pulling back the chocolate coloured curtain. He saw it wasn't a window, but a door, a large glass door that lead out on to a small deck that over looked Lake Sammamish. He was attempting to unlock the door when he heard Ness yell, "Oh my god!"

Jake ran towards her voice, a tight ball of worry gripping his insides. He sprinted through a walk in closet and almost ran into her. She was standing in the entrance of an ensuite bathroom. Her eyes wide and her mouth agape at the huge spa bath in the corner. Jakes shut his eyes in relief. She was safe. He chuckled a little at his overreaction.

"We have spa!" She squawked, leaning in to him as he wrapped an arm around her shoulder.

"And a private deck." He added, more quietly.

She turned to look up at him. "Really?"

"Really." He tugged on her shirt as he backed out, "and a walk in closet, apparently."

"This is such a cool house." She squealed. "And it's all ours Jake, ours!"

They went back down stairs and through the kitchen, to the glass French doors that lead to the deck out back. Renesme sifted through the keys and unlocked the large brass handle. Hand in hand they stepped out onto the wide cedar boards. It was a large hexagonal space, which wrapped around the rear of the house, wood and cable railings encasing it. The land fell away towards the back and the deck was supported by large tree-like poles that came from underneath to a good eight feet above the floor.

Overhead was a large lattice like open roof, with a rambling wisteria vine weaving its way around the beams, its lush mauve flowers hanging down from their suspended position above, creating shade in the summer. But what took their eye was the unobstructed vista. There was a sparkle of the blue lake in the near distance and beyond was a view of the city. Seattle's iconic sky-line with its needle like tower, was on the horizon and both Ness and Jake knew it would be spectacular at night.

The couple stood by the railing, looking over the hill below. Jake stood slightly behind Renesme, his hand sitting comfortably on her hip. "Wow." She said in awe.

"Ness, this place must be worth a fortune, the view alone is priceless. Your Great grandma must have been loaded."

She shrugged in reply. "I had no idea, she always lived so simply." She mused. "I guess sometimes, the more you have, the more you appreciate the simple things in life."

"Maybe." he replied. "I am really gunna enjoy this house though." He smiled bending forward, brushing her hair off her shoulder and kissing her on the neck. "I get to make love to an heiress." He mumbled against her collar. She could feel his smile by the way his teeth grazed her skin. Ren was up for it if he was, and he certainly felt 'up' right now. She pressed her back in to him, her rear rubbing against his crouch as she checked her watch. "We have about forty-five minutes if you want to show this _heiress _just how much you like the view."

"That's not nearly enough time to show you exactly how much I worship you." He rumbled into her ear. It was as if the breathtaking view turned him in to some kind of tender loving character from a romance novel. The heat of his breath sending a bolt of desire down the soft skin of her throat, over her breasts, her nipples hardening from the sensation and straight to the hot wet that was pooling between her thighs. She turned to face him, her lips reaching up into a soft kiss, with promise of more to come. "Well, how much time do you need?" she asked, her eyes soft and inviting.

She leaned her tush against the balcony as his hands rested on the top rail, his long, strong arms capturing her there. "All night my love. From sun down to sun rise."

She smiled, her white teeth shining at him. "Is that a promise?" she asked, her face turning in to a sultry seductress. He nodded as he leaned his body against hers, his hands palmed over her breasts, his fingers lightly pinching her nipples through her shirt. Jacobs's hands explored her curves, winding over her round ass, his fingers finding purchase underneath that sensitive spot were the ass ends and the leg begins and he lifted her up slightly so she was on her toes, his pelvis pushing into hers. He rocked into her a few times through his jeans, as he kissed her, this time with much more heat. His tongue grazing her lip and tasting her mouth.

She wrapped her hands around his neck pulling the embrace in harder.

She broke off breathless, after a moment she bit her lower lip and cocked her head to the side. She looked up at him through wanton eyes. "I mean it Jake, we have forty five minutes. Maybe you could give me a preview of this worship." Jake slowly shook his head from side to side.

"No Ness." She was wounded for a short moment, until she saw the flicker of primal lust in his eyes.

Form where his hands were under her backside, he slid them down and gripped her under her thighs and hoisted Ness up onto his middle, her legs wrapping around his waist. "I'm not going to worship you right now." He backed back and started to walk inside. "I want to take all night for that. If right now, I only have three quarters of an hour, I think I'll just fuck you on the kitchen bench." He said, his voice full of command and masculine power.

Nope, not a romance character, just a virile, horny teenage man-boy - Not that she was complaining.

She squealed like the lustful teenage girl she was as he jostled her up higher, his broad hands gripping her cheeks, his face buried in her cleavage. The unexpected yet appreciated change in his demeanour and his dominant manner heating her up from the inside out. She was gunna enjoy living with Jake.

He waked thought the lounge area and stoped as his legs hit the granite bench. He sat Renesme on the edge, hastily undoing the drawstring of her sweats, and yanking them down over her hips, all the while his face nuzzling her through her polo top. He tended to be an assertive lover but he didn't get quite this dominant that often, she secretly wished he did, she loved it when he took what he wanted. The sheer testosterone oozing from him making her ready for him instantly. Knowing they had a time limit only seemed to spur them both on, greedily taking what they both wanted.

Renesme reached her hands and undid the succession of buttons on his pants and wrapped her hand around his hard shaft. The soft skin smooth against her hands as she moved it up and down. Jacob let out a carnal groan against her chest as he came up to crash his lips onto hers again. Hungry, they both fought with their tongues, pulling and nipping in contest. Jake lifted her shirt up and pulled her bra down, his fingers found her nipples and he tweaked and twisted them as they kissed. He wrapped his arms around her tiny waist and manoeuvred her closer to the edge of the bench. She kicked one leg out of the pants and rested her heels up on the bench as he positioned himself at her wet, dripping folds. She leaned back on her hands and he entered her in one fast, clean movement. His width filling and stretching her, his size and fullness easily satisfying the ache she felt along her entire depth.

She watched as his face contort in to one of ecstasy, his eyes were shut, but she could tell they were rolled back behind the lids. His mouth formed and "oh" shape as his head fell back. It was very sexy.

He held her by the hips and he started to pump. His large hands wrapping around her, his thumb angling down to play with her clit. She bucked her hip and her back arched as he excited her pleasure spot. Her breasts jutted out with the movement and he took the opportunity the lick and suck on the hard pink nipple in front of him. His cock filling her over and over again as he sucked and pulled on her breasts. His thumb always working small circles on her slick nub. She could feel her climax building, her heat surging up through her when he abruptly pulled out, rumbling "uh ah, not yet my horny lady, we have a _little_ more time than that."

She moaned, frustrated on missing her high as he slid her off the bench and placed her sturdily on her feet. Then Jake spun her around, he spread her legs with his feet and he prodded her hips so she bent forwards. Renesmee's whole chest and abdomen were pressed against the stone, the cool of the granite stimulating her exposed nipples. She held on for dear life as he mounted her from behind, her arms spread out wide, her hands gripping the long edge of the counter on both sides. Ness loved it when he fucked her from behind, there was something animalistic about it that turned her on and the physical stimulation inside was a definite bonus. Jake, he didn't think about quite that much, he just loved fucking her.

They were both making visceral grunts and moans as he dove into her depths over and over. She felt him thicken as his speed increased, she shifted back ever so slightly and reached her hand to her wetness, covering her fingers in her own dripping slick. He took a hand full of her hair and pulled her head back as she rubbed herself with small circles, in time to his thrusts, both moving faster and faster as she tightened. Then, with one final movement, he pulled his hips back and then slammed up inside her, his length reaching her cervix as she arrived at her own climax, pressing back into him, wanting everything he could give. After a few more rocks back and forth he wrapped his arms around her again and pulled her up to standing, his hands cupping over her tits, rubbing and fondling as she wiggled her hips, still enjoying the aftershocks of her orgasm. He mumbled in to the delicious spot behind her ear. "I love you so much. I can't believe you let me do that."

"You know I love hot animal sex. You don't get rough with me as much as I'd like." He nuzzled into her neck, sucking a little hickey on the side, before he abruptly pulled out and slapping her ass as he did, the evidence of their love running down her leg. "Rough enough for ya?" he asked as he leaned his hip against the bench, buttoning up his fly.

"It's a good start." She retorted, a satisfied grin forming. The smart ass knew exactly what he was doing. She pulled her shirt down, adjusting her bra and threw her leg back into her pants and used the material to wipe up the mess. "Please tell me my clothes are in the car not Uncle Emmitt's truck. I'm soaking." She asked, only half complaining.

"I'm not sure but, I hope you have plenty of clothes, 'cause there's plenty more where that came from." He teased reaching up to cup her face, kissing her passionately. "We are gunna do that in every god dam room. We'd better get some paper towels or something." She laughed mimicking his gestures and cupping his face, their eyes meeting in a lovers gaze. "I love you Jake. I love it when you get all sexy cave man on me."

"Then if I'm a caveman, I think your house is like being in a brand new cave and I had to just _take_ my equally sexy cavewoman." He teased.

She looked up into his laughing eyes, hers looked back with a more thoughtful gaze. She wanted to share everything with him. The last few weeks, she'd opened up emotionally, shown him some of her inner demons- ones she didn't even realise were there. Somehow he made her brave enough to face the things and feelings she'd pushed down for most of her life. Only someone as special as Jake would be capable of loving her that much. He made her feel things she never dreamed she was capable of feeling, wether is be hot, rough caveman sex or slow smouldering goddess worshiping. She couldn't t imagine a life worth living without him next to her. Red Robin wanted to shout it out of the roof tops. 'This sex god of a man is mine, all mine! And he loves me with all my scars and baggage too!"

He was her best friend, her soul mate and her lover. He possessed her heart, her soul and her body. She wanted him to possess her belongings too. Well, maybe not 'possess', but she did want to share it with him. T

hey hadn't discussed it outright, but she already felt that they'd be spending the rest of their lives together. She decided she wanted to start sharing things like money and belongings, and things like- this house, this cave.

Ness wanted to try to make him see it and be open to the idea. "Jacob, this is _our_ home. Please think of it as yours too." She pleaded, her eyes switching between his back and forth. "If I 'm going to share all the scary, bad scars and stalker stuff, the least I can do is share the really good, city view and cool spa stuff too."

He frowned a little. "Nessie this is your house. I don't want you to have to share it with me in that sense. Just think of me as a really _good_ roommate."

"A roommate that fucks me in every room and worships me from sun down to sun up?"

"Precisely." He smiled.

Her brows pulled together in a little upset frown. "I don't want that Jake. I want you to have everything that I have, share every aspect of our lives together. Including financially." Jacob understood what she was saying, he felt the same way, but he just didn't feel right about it, not when he had nothing to give her in return.

"OK Ness. Look, how about this?" he tried to placate. "I'll help you look after this house as if it was my own. I'll fix something if it breaks. Change the light bulbs. We'll pay the bills together. Split the groceries. But, it's still _your_ house." He said, highlighting his words by a little squeeze of her waist as he held her face to face. "One day we'll share everything Nessie, I promise, but not until I can give you something of equal value in return." She looked like she was about to argue, he cut in adding. "Let a man have some pride?" he added.

She chuckled, nodding, taking his concession as a good start. _Silly boy and his pride._ "Alright." She said, dropping the subject for now. "And by the way, you sexy Neanderthal, you should already be a very _proud_ man." She bolstered, cupping his bulge through his still full pants and giving him a quick peck on the lips before heading to the truck to find her bag. "What you give me is really quite substantial already Jacob Black." She called as she loped up the stairs. She felt it was good to give him a little 'dimensional' reassurance now and then. Help his pride.

t mention it. Rose and Em helped them set up their meagre furniture. Emits truck held a new mattes on board and the men hauled it upstairs and lay it where the bed would eventually go.

They carried the kitten table and set up the chairs. Ness caught Jake solicitously eyeing the table and gave him a quiet slap in the arm. She whispered into his ear. "Technically this is the same room as the bench."

Jake just pulled her in for a tight hug his hands moulding to the curve of her hips and waist, he whispered back. "I'll just have to move it to another room then, won't I?"

After a few hours of hauling and unpacking, a trip by Emmitt and Jake to the dorm to collect the rest of Ness's stuff, a photo frame of the couple and a wolf painting in the bedroom, the house began to resemble a home.

Her foster parents kissed and hugged them both, Rose tearing up that her little Rough–gorge was growing up, and for her to be safe- in both ways- then they piled back into the truck and they headed back to Sequim before it got too dark.

Jake and Ness waved their arms in farewell as they stood side by side in the driveway, Jakes hand resting on Nessie's hip, hers around his waist. As the truck turned the corner, they happy couple were finally left on their own again.

Together.

They went grocery shopping for the first time together. They split the bill.

Ness thought it was like playing house, but for real and also with great sex. (At home not at the grocery store.) She was in heaven.

They ate Chinese food on the floor of their bedroom, before testing out the spa.

Jacob was true to his word and made love to her that night on the mattress on the floor of their new bedroom. Worshiping every inch of her body until neither had the strength to continue. They fell asleep, his arms wrapped around her, her legs twisted into his, Jacob still inside her.

They were sharing everything. Heart, body and soul, joined together.

Together, they were home.

* * *

**Well our little love birds are setting up nest / Cave.**

**Hope you enjoyed. I have a short chapter almost done that I'll probably post on Sunday.**

**Until then ladies. (and gents) Joyeux Noël and a partridge in a pear tree.**


	26. Chapter 26 What's that over my shoulder?

With only one week left of school, Jake decided to just accompany Ness around campus. It might have been a bit over the top but it was the only way he knew how to protector her from whatever the mad man might do.

They were both exhausted. Renesme was continuing her punishing training schedule throughout mid-terms and she'd had a couple of late nights cramming for exams and finishing assignments. Even though they tried their best to be in bed for at least eight hours a night, not that much of the eight was actually spent asleep. They were two young, fit and beautiful teenagers new to their physical relationship after all. Who could blame them?

When they finally were asleep, it would end up being broken, for Renesme had started waking up screaming with night terrors. There were two that seemed to be on the permanent roster of haunts. The first, she would dream she was in a raging inferno, all her exits locked. She would be trapped, the only door being held shut by a strange man on the other side.

The other dream was less dramatic but far more insidious. There was nothing. She had nothing and she was nothing. She was alone, homeless and abandoned. Not much actually happened in that second dream but the feeling she was always left with was one of destitution and abandonment. She wouldn't wake up screaming after that nightmare. But inevitably, Jake would find his shirt wet with tears from the aftermath of it.

She had yet to be contacted by the stalker in their new house. But, not for one second, did either of them think he'd given up his obsession- whoever he was. It was just a matter of waiting for the next love letter, gift or overt threat. It left them all on edge. It was draining to always be on the lookout. Tyring to feel the need to rush from one area to another, checking they weren't being followed.

Ness had tried to get Jake to stay at home, she was still concerned he was less safe on campus than she was. Jake categorically put his foot down though, if she liked him to be dominant, he was finally being dominant about this topic. No leaving Ness alone with stalker boy still out there.

It was the last day of term and they had been living together for only a few days when Ness broached the subject of Jacob finding a job. He had nodded off to sleep sitting in a chair in the library while she madly tried to finish off an assignment due at close of day. She rubbed the heel of her hands into her eyes, sitting up from the library computer. Renesmee looked over at his sleeping figure. His feet were stretched out straight in front of him, crossed at the ankles. His arms overlapped his chest with his palms pressed flat under his armpits.

She had just been taking a break from her essay, _Discuss the difficulties of nursing the elderly patient with Co-morbidities,_ too heavy for this time of the afternoon, and she decided to check her bank balance online. It had been getting seriously low lately. A small amount had been deposited in from the rental of the other property she'd inherited. But, houses cost a lot to set up for the first time, and living away from campus and feeding themselves and paying utilities added to the speed there funds were dwindling. They were running out, fast. _If only they could live off love._ The most obvious solution was for one of them to get a job. And Jake had the most time and flexibility to get one. The problem was going to be how to convince him to leave her side long enough to get one.

"Jake." She whispered in the cavernous space of the computer lab. "Jake!" his eyes opened and he looked around him, startled. He leaned his face into his hands and rubbed back and forth. "What's wrong?" he said at full volume.

"Shh!" she warned, raising her finger to her lips. "Let's go." She whispered, her thumb indicating towards to doors. "I have to talk to you."

They made their way out on to the Quad and sat down under a tree. He sat slouched, with his back against the trunk, his long legs stretched out. She lay on her back on the grass, her head resting on his stomach. "I was talking to coach about any connections he might have on getting you a job the other day."

"I'm not leaving you alone so I can work all day Ness." His dismissal evident in his tone.

"Just hear me out." She pleaded. She took his silence as him listening. "The thing is, I don't know about yours, but my bank account is about sucked dry. It costs a lot to feed you, you know." She jibbed.

"I know." He conceded, looking around the grassed area for the third time in as many minutes. "I hate to admit it but I've been thinking the same thing actually. I really, _really _don't want to leave you unprotected. But it does seem that the _mature_ thing to do would be to find gainful employment."

Sensing a victory on the horizon, she pushed the topic a little further. "Well, about that, coach knows the manager at the Redmond pool. He used to be the swim team coach here and I asked him to make a call. He said there is a position for a life guard."

"I'm not a lifeguard Ness."

She was well prepared, an answer for every obstruction he might create. "Well apparently there's a night course you can do, you go twice a week, for four weeks, and you get your first aid certificate too. Then you can work at the pool. I looked it up it doesn't cost that much." Oh was she ever well prepared.

"And anyway," she poked him gently in the rib. "You'll be the star employee once the swimmers get a look at your Indian hotness."

Jake laughed, his tummy bouncing her head as it moved under her. "Do you think all the MILF's will pretend to need saving just to get me to take my shirt off?" He teased.

She hadn't thought of that one. Ness looked up at him, her eyebrows drawn together in a scowl. "On second thoughts. We don't need the money that bad."

Jake enrolled in the lifeguard night courses that were due to start in two weeks time, at the beginning of the next term. In the meantime, he would work behind the front desk, taking entry fees and selling chips and candy in the kiosk to school kids after squad training. It was spring break for the college students, and while Ness had training, Jake worked as many casual shifts as he could before they left for California the following week.

He hated dropping her off and leaving her at campus alone. He hated it even more when she'd drive herself. Jake just knew intuitively _he'd _be watching out for her bright aqua car. And his stomach turned when he imagined the creeper watching her from the back of the bleachers or something. That _hidden in plain sight_ sort of crap. Some days his brain felt so full of thoughts and worries and an overwhelming need to protect her, he gave himself a headache. It was a shit way to live, it wasn't living it was existing.

But they needed money to exist, or at least to exist with enough money for food and gas and electricity. So Jake worked. He worked all kinds of shifts. Taking pretty much whatever was offered. Some starting as early as five in the morning, some for only three hours in duration, others for six. But, for all the shifts he was picking up, he made sure he was always home by night fall. Always. And if he wasn't working, he was by her side. Always.

Anyone who looked her direction got evil eyes from Jake. Everytime the phone would ring, she would jump. Any noise in the night brought on cold sweats. He would hold her until she calmed and fell back asleep. He did his best to make sure she felt his love for her radiating out of every pore. And, as much as he felt she did feel secure in his arms. Jacob knew the worry of this nameless aggressor was never far from her thoughts. She was always a little scared. Most of the time, she was terrified.

They needed a vacation.

* * *

**I don't know if I'm really happy with this chapter. It's only short but I felt I had to separate it from the last chapter and it definitely won't gel with the one I'll post tomorrow. **

**The next one will be better I promise. (or at least I hope you'll think it will be.)**

**Tell me what you think. M**


	27. Chapter 27 Warmed up

She was floating, letting herself be carried in the cool Pacific Californian waters. She closed her eyes to the setting afternoon sun and let her tired muscles unwind. She let all her worries float away on the tide. She'd had a hard few days. She'd had to push to win in the final for the Trojan classic and her muscles had been put through the wringer doing punishing drills at the annual Spring Athletics camp at USC.

But for now, she was floating, the sounds of the outside words obscured but the gentle splash of the water as it pooled around her head.

Then suddenly she was under, her body being pulled down by a hot vice around her waist. She felt herself being pulled sidewards and upwards again as she resurfaced, her body flush against the hot hard muscle of her attacker.

"Jake!" she spluttered, coughing up some brine and wiping the water from her eyes. "You scared the pants off me!" She yelled as she battered her open palm against his tanned chest.

"Really?" he asked as his hands wondered over her back to her rump, skimming his hands under the thin material of her bikini to her bare flesh. "They feel like there still on to me." He purred as he pulled her up so that her legs were wound around his waist. He lifted her up further and nestled his face between her triangle top, rubbing his lips over the soft skin.

Ness closed her eyes and let her head fall back, she wrapped her arms around his head, holding him there against her chest, letting the feeling roll over her as her skin prickled with hot chills. Then suddenly remembering they were on at a very public beach. She grabbed hold of his hair and pulled him away, wriggling out of his grasp. "You do such naughty things to me Jacob Black. You make me forget where we are."

She giggled as she rolled onto her back and lazily stroked her arms as Jake waded next to her. His gait was jerky and awkward. She looked over to him and saw his pained expression, the tell-tail flush of his cheeks as the blood flooded to them and elsewhere too.

"I'm done swimming. You want to go get something to eat?" she asked as she started walking into the shore. "Or do you need a minute in the _cold_ water?" she giggled, biting her lip trying to supress her smart ass grin and looking back at him over her shoulder.

"You little tease." He said as he grabbed her around the waist, pulling her back down into the sea backwards. "I think we'll order room service tonight. I have no intention of letting you put any more clothes on than what you have on right now." He uttered into her ear sending a shiver over her, she felt the familiar pull in her abdomen and wanted more.

"Talking like that is not going to help your little predicament though is it?" She provoked as she pressed hers ass into his hardness.

"Who are you calling _little_?" He taunted as his hand ran over the curves of her stomach his hands cupping over her v, scorching through the thin material.

"Defiantly not you." She said with conviction, which was laced with lust as she moved her backside up and down. He groaned and pulled her harder against him. "God Ness, your torturing me. I'm never going to be able to get out of the water at this rate."

"We'll have to wait till the cover of darkness then, won't we?" she challenged.

Jake called her bluff.

The couple stayed in the water, pressed together, rubbing through swimsuits as the golden orb set over the Pacific and the April sky became tinged with a vermillion hue. As the moon began to shine its silver trail over the swell of the water, Jake picked up Ness and waded them deeper into the ocean. She floated around him as he unwound one of the ties of her bikini bottom.

Letting it flap open, he ran his fingers along her heat. She sucked in a breath as the sensation of the cool water hit her. She wrapped her legs around him and lowered herself down until the cool of the water was replaced by the hard hot heat of skin. They rocked together in the darkness, the only sounds heard was the lapping of the water as it hit their bodies and the panting of their mingled breath.

Many minutes later, they walked hand in hand back to the beach. They found where they had left their towels and went back to order some room service. Jake still had more naughty things to do.

* * *

The next day was free of any athletic commitments. A group of the Washington Track and Field team decided to go to Disneyland. The couple drove in Jakes car down to Anaheim, meeting Courtney, Solomon, Chris, Kate and Darcy in the car park. They had a great time.

They held hands in anticipation as the Space Mountain cart seemed to creep its way up the incline. Her holding onto him like he was her saviour as the cart plummeted to the earth. The excited glisten in her eye after it was over made his heart ache for her, he didn't know how he could love her any more, but he did.

They stole kisses waiting in the lines. They sat at the back of the boat surrounded by families of young children and made-out in the imagined privacy of the 'small world' ride.

The group of friends stopped to have lunch, but first the girls went off to the bathroom, leaving the boys sitting waiting on a bench. _Girls always go to the toilet in packs_ he thought to himself. _Do they stop talking when they're actually going? Why does it have to be a group event?_ He wondered as he looked around the crowds, always scanning, always looking for either her face, her curls, her legs, her or the dick head who was watching her from the shadows.

They'd been gone for a really long time and Jake was beginning to fidget, his concern for her safety growing. They had no way of knowing if the stalker-freak had followed them here to LA.

He looked sideways at the three boys that were seated around him. As far as he knew any one of them could be the stalker. He eyed that Chris guy, he sat lounging back on the bench, nodding his head and giving sexy smiles to girls as they walked buy.

The first time they'd met, Jake had nearly smashed his pretty face in. He wasn't forwards in being backwards about his attraction to Ness, and he just rubbed Jake up the wrong way. Too cocky. Solomon was sitting next to Chris, he was watching the girls as they walked by also, but Jake was pretty sure it was the _guys_ that he was giving his sexy smiles to.

Sitting next to Jacob was Darcy and he shifted closer to Jake, giving him a slight elbow in the ribs. "They aint gunna come back any faster cause your tappn' yaw feet real fast." He said in his slow Texan drawl.

"Sorry," Jacob said as he stilled his foot. "It's just I get worried about her. This maniac… he's everywhere.., anywhere.., I just don't know how to protect her from him. It's just…" he let out a long breath through his pursed lips. "Did she tell you guys why we moved in together so suddenly?" Darcy shook his head, the other two men were looking over, listening also.

Jake regarded the group of athletic men who Ness spent so much of her time with. He decided to trust Nessie's instincts and agreed that they were good allies to have, a good second level backup, who could keep an eye out for Ness if he couldn't always be there. She had kept the details of her stalker's harassments a secret, Jake thought it was about time her friends were in on the deal. "You know she has a house in Sequim?" he began and they all nodded. "Well the fucker followed her up there a few weeks ago. He broke into the house and left a note for her in the bedroom." Darcy's eyes were wide, he looked suddenly worried, scanning the crowd for his girl, Kate, wishing they'd hurry on up. "And then we stayed next door at her foster parent's house because she was too freaked out."

"Who wouldn't be?" Interrupted Solomon, he moved his body forward, his elbows on his thighs and his hands dangling between.

"Yeah well, that wasn't the worst of it. Ness got up in the middle of the night to pee and she looked out the window and saw the house on fire. The mother fucker set her childhood home on fire."

"Wow. No wonder you've been following her around like a lost puppy dog. I just thought you were just one of those possessive types." Said Darcy, leaning back in his chair.

"No. I want her to have a life of her own, her own friends, and her own hobbies. You really think I like helping her study on topics like _necrotic wound management_?" he chuckled then blew out, a long serious breath. "We're pretty sure whoever he is, he's going to Washington though and she's not safe on campus. But if you guys would keep an eye out? Especially if she's alone?"

Darcy clasped Jake on the shoulder. "Of course. She's like a sister to us. We'll find this ass whole and when we do…"

Solomon interrupted again. "We'll show him what happens when he messes with the track and field team." There was a murmur of agreement and fist pumping as the boys continued to chat, the ice finally broken and Jake accepted into their select circle.

Chris and Solomon went back to grinning at the girls who walked past and commenting on their _assets _after they had. "I see three fine women walking our way now fellas, look sharp." Said Chris nodding towards the bathrooms. Jake looked over to see the three girls as they chatted animatedly to each other. Courtney was the tallest of the three, she was tall, _really_ tall, Jake guessed six foot maybe a little more. Her long straight legs looked even more stretched in her short shorts. Her wavy Nordic hair in a high pony tail. Her tank top was low and cut in at the back. She knew she was beautiful and was very happy for the world to see it.

Kate's clothes were far more subdued. She had on a simple summer dress, her dead straight flaxen hair skimming her shoulders, her eyes finding Darcy's through the crowd. Kate was taller than Renesmee, but only by half an inch.

Jake watched her as Ness moved towards him. She had on a pair of mid-thigh denim cut offs, folded at the cuff. He hardly ever got to see her in shorts, in Washington it was either too cold or he was seeing far more skin than the bare legs of summer shorts and he liked seeing her in them. He watched her muscles shift as she walked. The way her quadricep angled across her thigh, the curve on her leg as it dipped in from the inner knee to groin.

She had amazing legs. Some women had thin legs, long legs, skinny legs, but the way hers curved and the muscle defined, made hers amazing. Jake watched her long toned arms swing as she picked up her pace towards him.

Her face brightening with her brilliant smile. Her thick full lashes, her naturally shaped brow, her amazingly soft lips, her full chest bouncing a little in the tight v-line top she wore- he couldn't stop looking at her. God she was beautiful. _She could be a Victoria's secret model… hang on, No! _He balked, _No one gets to see her in lingerie accept me. But she defiantly would be hot enough to be one… _

"Would you quit staring at me!" she said as she met him, pulling him up to standing. "You'll force me find a quiet corner somewhere and take you to the happiest place on Earth," she giggled, whispering into his ear.

"Hey it's not my fault your so dam hot. It's a sin to look so good in denim shorts" He said, taking her into his arms and kissing her till her knees gave way a little.

"What was that for?" she asked a little breathlessly.

"For taking your sweet time in the bathroom. I missed you. And also because I think you're hotter than a Victoria's secret model." His eyes undressed her as she went a little weaker at the knees, "–not that you're allowed to show anyone your underwear but me." He added as they walked off following the others to find a place to eat.

They stayed at the park until late, they watched the night parade and the fireworks over the castle. She'd truly felt like a princess that night, in the arms of her prince charming as they watched the exploding lights fall over the palace, her back pressed against him, his arms wound safely around her with his chin in her shoulder. Life was pretty much perfect.

* * *

The next day had been spent traveling up the coast towards San Francisco in time for the Stanford classic on Saturday. Ness was sitting on the bed of their tiny hotel room in shorts and a Disneyland t-shirt. She was finishing off her pre-comp carbohydrate loaded pasta dinner when Jake asked what she wanted to do that night.

"Let's just stay in." she said as she reached for the TV remote. "My heat is at nine, so I don't want to do too much tonight."

"I have a good idea." Said Jake, his voice muffled as he leant over the edge of the bed searching through his bag. He sat up grinning, his brilliant smile stretched across his face. A roguish look in his eye. He held up a pack of cards, nodding his head in a 'done deal' kind of way. "Strip poker. Winner gets one special request."

Renesmee laughed, her shoulders and chest bouncing under her shirt. Her head was thrown back as she clutched her arms around herself as she fell to the side of the soft bed. "I can't believe you brought that." Joyful tears squeezing out of the corners of her eyes.

"Well I didn't have scrabble." He shrugged. He narrowed his eyes, thinking aloud. "But it would have been good to see what I could have done with a triple word score."

Ness threw a piece of fusilli at him, it landed square on his forehead. "You're such a perv." She sniggered, getting up to put her now empty plate on the table.

"Have you looked in the mirror lately babe? Can you blame a guy? In fact, you're lucky I let you wear any clothes at all."

"_Let_ me? Is that how it is, is it?" She playfully clipped, reaching in to her bag. "Right Mr Black." She challenged, shoving on her Udub team track suit and socks and a scarf and then a hoddie over the top. She had a smirk on her lips, her tongue resting on the front edge of her top teeth. "Let's play!"

Jake had no way of knowing that Ness had been taught to play poker years ago. Her uncle Emmitt had been going to poker nights with his buddies for years, and it was a serious game to him. Ness had been a good student.

Now, a thousand miles from Washington, in a small off-campus hotel, she was wiping the floor with Jake.

He sat on their hotel bed, in nothing but his boxer shorts on. Renesmee on the other hand, was sweating under her layers of clothing, she'd already taken her sweater and scarf off as a free-be.

"Two pair." She said, shaking her head as she lay her cards on the coverlet. "Honestly Jake have you ever actually played this game?" she looked over at his sorry form, his well laid pains to get her naked and at his advantage, completely ruined. "Get 'em off." She ordered, motioning to his pants.

"Oh Ness?" he moaned "Can't you take of your track suit at least?"

She simply moved her head from side to side, biting in to her cheek to hide her smile. "Have you looked in the mirror babe? You'll be lucky if I ever let you put your clothes back on." She tormented, repeating his words back at him.

"This is really unfair you know?" He sulked, as he stood up off the bed and swiftly pulled off the last of his clothes.

"Much better." Ness said looking over his body, enjoying the distinct curve of his arms and the broadness of his shoulders as his hair fell over his well-defined chest. She could see the muscle of his back as it curved around to the undulating wave of his six pack and further, to the obliques, angling in as if to point to the prize below. His manhood was making its way to full mast, in spite of his pouting, his muscly legs bulging against his russet skin.

If she wasn't hot enough under all those layers, she was positively steaming now.

"Now, what is my special request?" she enunciated slowly. Her palms pressed together lifting her fingers to her pursed mouth. "I think I'd like…" Jakes face was awash with dread. He was at her mercy and she was revelling in it. She looked to be ready to have some fun with him. But deep down, she couldn't wait to have him run his hands over her skin. She wanted him to have his way with _her_.

She mustered up her best sultry voice, her finger beckoning him over "I'd like… for you come here…" Her eyes widened as a naughty smile spread. "And try and take these stinking sweats off of me." She started backing up as Jake stalked closer. "But you've got to catch me fist!" she sang, giggling as she turned to run in to the bathroom.

Jake jumped up on to bed racing across it. He chased her into the bathroom as she ducked under him scooting back to the bed. Jacob followed, reaching his long arms in front and catching her by the waist. Tackling her onto the mattress they fell together in a fit of laughs. "I win!" he said, as he trapped her legs with his knees. "What's my prize?"

She began to unzip her jacket, humming. "You get to see what's under all these layers."

* * *

Ness opened her eyes to the crack of light beaming through the thick double curtain of the hotel room. She was lying naked flat on her stomach, sprawled across the large bed they shared, her arms above her head. Jake was snoring quietly next to her. She watched him as he slept, they were both at the foot of the bed, falling asleep where they fell after an amazing night of experimenting and testing new ground. She'd been in a carefree, daring mood and Jake had seized the opportunity.

He was lying on his back now, one arm up by his hair, the other resting below his bare chest. As she lay there, with her head to the side, her cheek resting on the cool sheet beneath, Renesmee observed the rise and fall of his chest. He looked so peaceful, his soft lips were parted, _God, I want to kiss them!_ His black lashes just fanning his cheek, the morning growth of stubble emerging along his jaw. She was reaching her hand up, barely touching the roughness of his stubble as Jake lazily opened his eyes. Ness jumped, when a split second later her phone alarm began clanging its tone_. Fucking alarm._

She reached her arm, half sitting up over Jake, to where the phone sat charging on the far bedside table and shut off the din. He watched as her bare chest skimmed past his face as she leant over, her body sliding over his stomach under the sheets. It was a very nice way to wake up, he thought.

Renesmee threw herself back on to the mattress, her face pressing into its softness, "Nnnngh," she moaned. "I don't want to get up." Her voice muffled through the bed.

"What time is it?" he asked, sleep still thick in his throat.

"Six thirty."

"Why so early Ness?" he whined rolling to his side flinging an arm and leg over her, his warm skin heating her bare flesh where it touched. "I thought you said your heat wasn't until nine?"

"I have to register by eight thirty and I've got to warm up before that."

"How long do you need for your warm up?"

"I don't know, about half an hour. I go for a little run, then I stretch."

"So basically, you need to get your heart rate up a little, get your blood warm and stretch your muscles?" He asked rhetorically as he leaned his chest in to her back, his hot breath in her ear. "I can think of better way for you to warm up." He said as he ran his hand from the back of her thigh to up, over her ass.

She rolled, so that their bodies were pressed flush. "What did you have in mind exactly, Mr Black?" as she moved her face up so she could kiss those soft lips.

"Let me show you Miss Masen." He said as he shimmied down under the covers below her waist.

Ness gasped as he started her warm up.

* * *

They were speeding along the streets of outer Stanford, headed to the track and field stadium. Ness looked at the dashboard clock. _Eight fifteen. _"Fuck Jacob, go faster!" she urged as she did up the laces of her joggers and zipping the ankle of her nylon sweats. "I can't believe I'm going be late. Coach is gunna have my fucking ass." She panicked. "I'm rooted if I miss registration."

"Two things Ness, I'm pretty sure you've been _rooted_ either way and only_ I_ get to have your ass." He smirked. She slapped him on the shoulder as she begin to plait her ponytail. _"_You are never _getting _my ass." She stated flatly.

"What _never_?" he asked, his head whipping sideways to look at her.

"Watch the road." She pointed, shaking her head frustrated, "I don't know Jake!" she moaned "We're not having this conversation now." She griped, her thoughts elsewhere, "What was I thinking? I can't be late Jake, I just can't! This is the last competition before Regionals. I can't, _not_ compete. I can't jeopardise my sponsorship."

His jesting mood gone as he realised the gravity of their delayed departure. "It's aright sweetie," he said as he saw the stadium lights ahead. He pointed with his fingers as he held the top of the steering wheel. "Where almost there, I'll drop you off at the front and then I'll go park. I'll see you after the heat." She nodded her agreement.

"I just hope John Pellagra from Nike isn't here this early. I'm fucked if he sees me running in with only two minutes to spare."

Ness registered with six minutes to spare, Jakes clock was a little fast.

She waved at him from the start marshal area. He was seated in his favourite spot about twenty foot from the finish, generally in the first few rows. Today he was in the third. He was flicking through his phone, checking on emails when he felt a person sit down next to him.

"You guys just made it here in time." He said haughtily. "One guess what kept you."

Jake look over at him, glaring through narrowed eyes, his jaw working. "What do you want Chris?"

The blond man held his hands up in a gesture of good will. "I know I'm not your favourite person. I guess I was out of line hitting on her that time when she's obviously madly in love with you."

"You think?" Jake said sarcastically, his eyes focused on Ness and her race that was beginning.

"Look, I just wanted to tell you that I'll keep an eye out for her." Jake turned to asses him, Chris was one of the top five people on his possible list of stalkers. Ness had argued that he was present when a lot of the photos were taken or even in them, so it couldn't be him. Jake still wasn't so sure.

As if reading his thoughts Chris dived into a self-defence. "I know you think I'm probably her stalker. But I'm telling you I'm not. Sure, I think she's beautiful and amazing and pretty much perfect, but I'm not into hiding in the shadows and chasing girls across the country side. And I'm sure as shit not an _arsonist_." They paused as the starter's gun went off and Ness began to hurdle.

They watched as she came out to the blocks knocking the first hurdle over. She kept sprinting to the next set, clearing it but her steps were off, she was still only somewhere in the middle of the pack by about half way through the race. Jake lent in close to the seat in front as he watched silently. She seemed to get her rhythm back by the final few hurdles. She caught two more runners and finished third, clipping another girl at the line. He watched as she slowed to a stop after the finish line. Her hands on her hips as she caught her breath. Her shoulders slumped while she waited impatiently for the times to appear on the screen.

"You know her coach is going to be pissed," said Chris. Jake had forgotten he was still there momentarily. And look a moment to respond to his words.

"That's not fair, he can't get angry because she missed her footing. Everyone has a bad day now and then."

"He won't be angry about the miss-step. He'll be angry about her prep. For being late to warm up. She's was off during training at the camp too. _You _might not know it, but you're a _really_ big distraction."

Jake was taken aback. Ness had alluded that same thing to him all those months ago when she'd told him the reasons she didn't date. He'd always put it down to her being scared and training had just been a good excuse. But to think he might be stoping her from reaching her full potential. That upset him greatly. "So what am I supposed to do? Not see her? Break up with her? Cause that's not going to happen, not even if I wanted it to. She wouldn't let me." Jake let out a sigh as the times flashed up onto the screen. _13.9_ "Will she even get into the final with that time?" he asked, guilt beginning to eat into him.

"It was a fast heat, she might be a minor qualifier, probably get an outside lane. We'll have to see what the other heats time." They sat in silence as the next row of girls lined up. Ness just stood on the sidelines, still in her two piece and spikes, watching to see if she would qualify into the final race. "You don't have to stop seeing her altogether you know." Chris said from the silence.

"What do you have in mind?" asked Jake.

"I think you should avoid fucking her the morning of a race." He stated flatly.

Jake just gave him a shocked incredulous look. "Excuse me?" he said, stunned by the man's forwardness.

"Are you denying it?" Chris challenged, Jake just continued to stare, dumbfounded. "Exactly!" said Chris, Jakes silence all the conformation he needed. "Really, you should avoid fucking her the night before a race too." The gun went off again and both refocused on the race at hand. It was a slower race than the first. Ness' time was still fast enough to qualify, so far. Chris continued. "I know this is weird, talking about… _it_. Trust me. I don't want to talk about it either. It's just.., she's good Jake. Like _really_ good. Everyone is talking about it. If she continues on the times she's been running, she'll make the national team. The Olympics are only two years away and she a legitimate contender. But, as naturally talented as she is, so is everyone else at that elite level. What puts you on the medal dais is your training, you prep, your focus."

"Oh man." Said Jake, his hands fisting into his hair. He felt the weight of her abilities pressing down on him. He couldn't be away from her, he knew that. But they could abstain from sex for a few days here and there. If it meant the difference between success and failure. It was the least he could do.

He dared a little smile when the last of the heats were run, Ness had qualified with her time. Skimming in by the edge of her teeth. Chris got up lifting his heavy bag with him. "I've got to go warm up. I'm sorry if I over steeped just now. I just thought someone should tell you how things really are. And I wanted you to know that I care about you girlfriend, but in a healthy, normal, non-stalkersish way. Think about the abstaining thing. Most footballer's swear by it." he said as he turned and trotted down to the front steps and below to the field.

He watched as the tall blond man waved and moved to the side of the step as Renesmee appeared below. Her jacket slung over her shoulders, her tiny running boy leg shorts the only thing covering her legs. She was walking in her socks, her bag hung diagonally across her torso, and her spikes in her hands. She looked miserable. She looked up and Jakes eyes met hers, her face brightened slightly, but she still look like she was going to cry. She wanted this national title more than she'd ever wanted anything else. Except maybe for how much she wanted to be with Jake. Needing to help her in some way, Jacob stood up and met her half way, taking her bag off her, it was heavy.

"I'm sorry." He said as soon as they sat down.

"What for?"

"For almost making you late, for not letting you do a proper warm up, for distracting you before a big race, and wrecking you focus. "

"Jake you didn't _make_ me do anything. I could have put my foot down at any time."

"I know, but I didn't' help did I? I didn't encourage you to focus. I was being selfish."

"Darling? You think I didn't get a bit of selfish pleasure out of this morning too?"

"But it wasn't just this morning was it? There was all those times last night as well. I was talking to Chris."

"I saw that. Why were you talking to Chris? I thought you two had a 'Don't hit on my girlfriend and I won't _hit_ you' kind of agreement?"

"We do… we did. I guess we have a new agreement now. Any way, he was kind of suggesting we not do _that_ the night before a race."

"You were talking to him about our sex life?" she asked in a loud whisper, her disbelief obvious in her tone as her eyes darted to the other spectators around them.

"We were talking about how talented you are. And how much you need to focus and prepare for a race. And he kind of had a good point. Maybe we should try and see if you get good results when you're horny." He joked, trying to bring on the smile he loved to see so much. It worked, she laughed, in spite her embarrassment that they'd been talking about her libido in an athletics grandstand.

Her Final wasn't till the afternoon, they had a good five hours to wait, so the couple set up camp in a quiet back corner of the stadium. They spent the day relaxing and listening to music with shared earphones.

An hour before the race, Ness said her goodbyes to Jake and made her way down to the warm up track to stretch. Ness did a lot better in the final. She placed second with a good time. Still half a second off from a PB but it was a far cry from the morning's performance. She'd redeemed herself. Even though she did get her ear chewed out by her coach.

She was much happier as they travelled back to the hotel to collect their things and check out. The mini break had been wonderful, a much needed breather form the photos and creepy notes and fires. But their new home, with bits and pieces of furniture, a photo frame, a wolf painting and the familiarity of their own pillows, was waiting for them back in Seattle and both were happy to drive home that night.

As long as they had each other anywhere could be home, but Ness kind of missed her spa.

* * *

**I have been waiting to get this chapter out for ages. I just had to have the rest of the story catch up. I how you liked it as much as I enjoyed writing it. (which was a lot- just in case you didn't figure.) : -)**

** I hope to post again next weekend but we'll see how much spare time I get over the silly season to write. ****Merry Christmas all. Stay safe! M**


	28. Chapter28 - Rubber band ready to snap

**Hope you all hade an enjoyable Christmas.**

**Aretee; I'm finally saying the thankyou I promised you last week for your advise on school calendar and terminology. Thankyou!**

**This chapter has tiny lemon in it. Just a little make up sex. Be forewarned. Enjoy**!

* * *

After arriving back in Seattle and the semester re-commenced, the couple soon settled into a contented routine. Ness had training of some sort most mornings, classes in the day and more training in the afternoon. And Jake did the same.

The commute from Redmond to the University district was around half an hour and Jacob happily spent the rest of the day chaperoning Renesmee around campus. He would sit quietly listening to his iPod next to her during lectures and while she studied in the library. He would watch from the sidelines as she ran drills in training. He would spot for her in the weight gym. Jog with her through the grounds. He was the fittest he'd ever been. He even started doing palates classes with her. The benefit of his new found strength not lost in the bedroom either. They shared everything together. They were inseparable. Lovers joined at the hip. Their happiness however was always marred by the overhanging unknown threat around every corner.

Jake started his night course to become a lifeguard. Bella agreed to stay those nights to keep Ness company. Ness had tried to argue, but neither of them would let her have a word in edgewise. The evenings she spent with Bella were always pleasant though. Ness missed living with her friend. Jake and Ness had asked Bella if she wanted to move in with them, but Bella decided to wait until the end of term in July. Bella already had her room picked out though, one of the others left for Racheal.

The girls would cook up a storm every Tuesday and Thursday night, putting away containers of leftovers and baking treats and cookies. Nothing chocolate though, Ness was still on a lead up to the NCAA's.

Jake was always keen to arrive home to the feast they would have prepared. He always knew who had cooked what. Bella's was delicious, simple, familiar American food. The things her father liked to eat. Whereas Ness cooked far more exotically, most things she made were healthy, super healthy. But still mouth-watering, packed with herbs and spices Jake had never tried, but he enjoyed nonetheless. She often made vegetarian but Jake wouldn't realise there was no meat in the dish until Ness told him. She cooked amazing French dishes too. They weren't that healthy at all, all cream and butter, especially the deserts, but, oh my god they were good. He guessed it was the food her Grand-mère must have cooked.

Between both women, Jacob was in gastronomic heaven.

Ness began a two week placement at a teaching hospital at the end of April. Jake thought she looked super sexy in her purple scrubs. They were both starting work in the early hours of the morning and it was impossible for Jake to drive Renesmee to the hospital with enough time to get back to the pool to open up. Ness had tried to convince Jake that the best thing would be for her to drive to work. He hated the idea but agreed to it anyway. They talked on the phone most of her drive there. Ness was edgy walking between the car park and the main building. Always looking over her shoulder, her bottle of mace, cold in her pocket. She hated living like that, always a little scared, the adrenaline always pumping. The stalker hadn't made any kind of contact since the fire, she was just waiting for his next move. She didn't have to wait for long.

It was her fifth day on the surgical ward, she was just washing her hands after changing a dressing when one of the clinical nurses stuck her head around the corner. "Renesmee. Looks like you have secret admirer." She sang. Ness slammed off the tap and quickly dried her hands, following the nurse down to the desk. There in the middle of the counter sat a mixed bunch of flowers and a long thin box. _Maybe they're from Jake._ But by the way her skin was crawling and her stomach turned over, she knew it wasn't.

She reached up to the flowers and looked through for a note. There wasn't one, so she lifted the lid of the box to find a stethoscope coiled in it. She lifted it up, there was a folded note underneath. She unfolded it and read it, it was in the same scratchy writing she recognised. "Votre cœur bat pour moi et mon coeur bat pour toi." _Your heart beats for me and my heart beats for you._

Her hand was shaking as she read and translated the note. She must have looked as white as a ghost because Julie, the nurse who had signed for the flowers, wheeled a desk chair over to Ness, making her sit down. "Are you alright Renesmee?" asked Julie. She just nodded, folding the _gift _back in the box and shutting the lid_. _"Do you want a new set of ears? I already have some." Ness said as she pushed the box towards the nurse.

"Not a secret admirer then?" Julie asked.

Nessie shook her head. "I don't know who he is, he's been sending me stuff for months. But it's much worse now, he burnt my grandmother's house down a few months ago." She said as she took the glass of water Julie held out to her.

"These flowers are from the hospital florist, maybe we could find out who sent them?" offered Julie. It was the first real chance at finding the prowlers identity they had had so far.

Ness lifter her head, nodding. "That's a great idea. Do you think they'll tell us?"

Julie shrugged. "Old Mary has worked down there for years, if we tell her the story she might. It can't hurt to try." Julie was shift supervisor and easily organised for the two of them to have their break early to go down to the flower shop.

Ness and Julie explained to the old lady behind the counter about their predicament. Mary looked over her orders for the day. It was a dead end.

The flowers had been paid with cash. The order was made yesterday, Mary's day off so she was no help even remembering who it was that had sent the disturbing gift. Renesmee made her way back up to the ward, scared once again, again looking over her shoulder at every shadow. She hated living like this.

Ness decided not to tell Jake about the gift or the flowers until after her prac was over. She knew he would only worry, and then he'd want to do something like quit his job so he could drop her off to work. She hated lying to him. Or at least lying by omission.

It was then that she really started to hate who ever this stalker was. Not only had he frightened her and stalked her, he had damaged property, burnt and broken into houses, and threatened people she loved. But now; now he had her changing the way she lived her life, bending her own moral rules, doing things that went against her personal integrity, she felt trapped. Ness felt like a caged animal and she knew when she finally saw the face of her captor she was going to claw it off.

About a week later, the night she got home after her final day on her hospital prac Ness told Jacob about the flowers and stethoscope. She knew he'd known something was up all week. He'd asked her if she was ok, but she wouldn't tell him. It had eaten her up inside. That night, she'd told him as soon as he got home. He only partially reacted the way she'd expected though. He'd been concerned, like she'd expected, asking if she was alright now. Telling her it had been a good idea to see if the florist could trace the sender. But then, he was hurt by her lie. He was angry.

She hadn't been prepared for her confession to lead to their first real fight. He had accused her of not trusting him. That they were a team and they had to figure these thing out together. Asking what other secrets she kept form him.

She told him he was suffocating her. That he didn't trust in her ability to look after herself.

They both said things they didn't mean.

She ended up screaming at him to get out.

And he left the house with a slamming of the front door.

The sound echoed around the empty home. He'd left.

He'd actually left. Ness was stunned beyond belief. She crawled her way upstairs and lay down in their bed. She crawled over to his side and stuffed his pillow into her gut and folded herself around it. She was alone.

She cried herself to sleep that night in the cold empty bed. Inhaling his sent in the sheets. The smell of pine and Earth and him. It was everywhere.

She wanted to build that brick wall up around her heart, run and hide away from her pain, but she didn't. She waited half the night for him to come home, but he didn't. She cried until she fell asleep, the physical pain of her breaking heart like a knife in her chest.

She'd once thought his love was like a medicine to her heart, a healing balm. If that had been true, the absence of that medicine left her heart bleeding and raw. And just like an injured patient floating in a cloud of morphine, Ness had been blissful in her love. And if the drug were to be reversed, the pain hit with full force, leaving the patient writhing in pain. Jakes departure was her hearts antagonist. Red Robin was in agony.

She woke that next morning to the light pouring into the room. She'd forgotten to close the blinds in her anguish the night before. She was a bundle of nerves, she felt so highly strung she thought she'd snap. It occurred to her that they both were so highly strung over this stalker business that they had both finally snapped, only it was at one another not the stalker. They'd taken their frustrations out on the wrong person.

The bedroom was too painful to be in. She needed to get out. Go for a run. Clear her head. She got up and dressed in her running gear, platting her hair and racing down the stairs. She jogged into the kitchen to get a drink and looked over to the couch. She'd half hoped she just hadn't heard him creep back home last night. But the old brown faux-suede sofa sat empty in the middle of the room. She wanted him to come home. She worried where he'd spent the night last night. Did he visit Bella? A little hot ball of jealousy burned in her chest. She tried to douse it, but the words they had fired at each other last night were running through her head.

Her mood shifted to one of defensiveness, she didn't want to feel pain. She scolded herself, she knew it was a bad idea letting someone in. _ This is what trust gets you. Stupid girl. It give someone the power to break you. _ Ness hefted the big metaphorical boulders up around her soul. Struggling to re-fortify. Telling herself she didn't need him anyway. She had been a child of the streets, surviving in that hostie adult world. She had survived for the last eighteen years without Jacob Back. She could easily survive on her own now, an adult in this world, so many other things to focus on. She was her own person. She didn't need Jake's love or his protection. She was never letting anyone in like that again.

Those were all the things she was telling herself. Trying her best to be tough, strong, independent and angry. Protect her heart before it could get broken.

It was pointless, Jake already had her heart- wherever he was- she was protecting an empty space.

She put her phone in her arm band and pugged in the ear buds. She knew she was deluding herself. Of course she needed Jacob. He was her everything, her soul mate, her best friend. What she really wanted was for him to come back home and love her and heal her hurt and keep her heart safe for her. She swallowed her pride and left a note on the counter in case he returned while she was out. _Jake. I love you. Sorry I didn't tell you. I missed your arms around me. I've gone for a run. I won't be long. Please don't leave without talking to me. It killed me to be apart from you last night. You look my heart with you. XXXXXXXX Ness. _

With a sense of urgency and a need to escape she opened the front door and stepped outside.

She nearly tripped on his giant foot as she marched out. "Jake?" she called, her music was up and her voice was adjusted to the loud volume. He jumped in his sleeping position, wincing as the corner of the brick dug into his back. He was reclining against the side of the house under the front porch, his legs flat out in front of him. "Did you sleep here all night?" she asked hunkering down to him, her legs either side of his. She could feel the smile across her face. She felt like she should be pinching herself or something. Had he really just stayed here? Her relief gushing through her like a freak wave crashing against a weather beaten rock on the shore. Hitting hard, and spraying up high before crashing down in a fray of white wash, then slowly ebbing back as if the water had always been tranquil. Her pointless self-doubt had gotten the best of her. She had genuinely thought he'd left. Permanently. All her life all she had ever know was permanent separation and abandonment. She had just assumed the worst. Maybe what she should have been doing was slapping herself across the face, because she was an idiot.

He looked up at her, moving to a more upright seated position. "Oh Nessie I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that. I understand why you didn't tell me. I wish you had of told me, but I understand why you didn't. Let's not fight." His eyes were looking up at hers, blood shot like he'd been crying for as long as she had.

"No, I'm the one who's sorry Jake. I should have told you. You're right, we're a team. This is too big for me to deal with alone. I like having you with me all the time. And I _never_ _ever_ want to spend another night without you again." She placed both her trembling hands on his face. She couldn't believe he was still here. "Did you really sleep here all night?"

Jake looked down, nodding his head. "My backs killing me and my ass is asleep." He said, grimacing as he stretched his back. He didn't realise his leaving would wake the inner demon who had left her paralysed with heart break most of the night. He had just gone outside to cool off, forgotten his key and fallen asleep.

_He didn't leave me. My medicine had just slept on the porch_. She felt the pain sooth as her hastily fractured heart started to quickly knit back together.

She promised herself to never let him walk out the door in anger again.

She thought she'd been afraid to have her heart broken all those months ago when she'd refused Jacobs advances, that girl had no idea what fear was. Now that she really understood how amazing it could be to truly love someone, to really be half a portion of a whole, the absence of that love was a petrifying, soul shattering, living hell.

"Oh Jacob I love you." She said as she kissed him with a ferocity that surprised even herself.

It wasn't long before he was kissing her back, his hands creeping up the inside of her running singlet. They managed to stand and get themselves inside the front door before Jake had her pinned against the wall of the foyer.

There was no time for foreplay, no need for the slow build up.

He wenched her top over her head as she did the same to him. His hands pulled her sports bra down so that her pink nipples were jutting upwards as he took them in his mouth sucking on them hard. At the same time she was undoing his belt and fly, he was yanking her shorts and underpants down until they fell to her ankles and she kicked them off along with her shoes.

He lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist as he entered her. With his pants still only halfway down his thighs he pushed himself inside her, as if he was nailing her to the wall. His strong arms held her by the ass as her back pressed into the wall.

Their lips never broke contact as he rammed into her over and over. Ness was using her legs to hold herself up and the effort made her tighter than ever. He felt bigger than ever to her too, his crazed need an aphrodisiac beyond measure.

His repeated movements brought her closer and closer to the edge.

It was only a few minutes later that they found themselves standing on the cliff together, holding on as they jumped into the ecstasy. They both screamed at their climax.

The rubber band had been pulled tight. It had snapped and it had brought them together in the recoil.

This time, when they had snapped, it was manifesting in their physical need and desire for one another and it had been the right person on the receiving end.

* * *

**I may update twice this week, depends on how busy the weekend gets.**

**Thankyou for the reviews girls. They are the motivation to keep on writing.**

**Peace out- M**


	29. Chapter 29 In the Zone

**This is a bit more of an insight into 'athlete' Renesmee psyche. we haven't seen much of her in a while. Or what I should say is it's a glimpse of what it takes to get to the top. And boy what an athlete she is, so much so that I have made a double batch of Lemon pie today. **

**Oh, and Jacob is a randy twenty year old boy. God love him!**

* * *

It was last week of May and the Pacific 12 championships were less than 3 days away, Ness was madly finishing assignments to hand in early and sitting special exemption exams. Being an athletic scholarship student had its advantages. The university couldn't expect a student to compete under the collage colours and then not have any lenience when the events clashed with exam week.

Even though she was cramming academically, she was more than keeping up with her punishing training schedule. She was resolute in her goal to make it to the National champs this year and Jacob was getting a firsthand glimpse of the determination it took the get to the elite level she was zealous working to achieve.

Jake was off work today and he'd taken to riding his pushbike alongside Ren as she ran through the campus grounds. She'd been running hard for almost an hour and was showing no sign of slowing.

"Ness, how about you call it quits?" called Jake from his bike. He watched her as she continued to run. Her cutaway running shorts exposing all of her legs, her razor back bra visible under her cutaway singlet, her defined arms swinging in a strong angle as she jogged. She had on her running cap and sunglasses, her earphones buzzing with her running playlist. She was a woman on a mission. Completely in the zone. Completely focused.

"Ness!" he yelled, trying to get her attention through her concentration. Her head jerked to the side as she kept on running. He could tell the look she was giving him even through her shades. The focused look. The intense look. The 100% effort look. She wasn't done running.

Jake learnt to just go with the flow when she had that look. It was intense. It was that fierce determination that made her the incredible athlete she was. But it was even better when she turned that look onto him. When he was in the receiving end of that focus and determination he was all she saw, 100%. When she wasn't in 'training' mode and she was just his Nessie, she gave herself over to him completely. Their lovemaking went to another level. The pleasure she would bestow him was intense. He loved that side of her. The fiery red head with a temper to match, that fire that made her run like the wind was the same inferno that made their love burn even brighter.

She was looking at him still as she ran, a slight smile on her lips. His lazy peddling keeping him in line with her.

"Ness you've run at least six miles, probably more, I think that's enough for today." Her coach had asked Jake to help reel her in, she was pushing and pushing herself more and more and they were both afraid she was going to push herself too far eventually.

"I'll just to another five intervals ok?" she puffed

"Three!" he countered

"Four!" she challenged as she increased her pace. Jake just shook his head and peddled a little faster to keep up.

About ten minutes and four intervals later, they reached the front of her old dorm building and Ness slowed to a jerky run, then bend over forward and ran a few more steps into the garden empting her breakfast over the bracken. Jake jumped of the bike leaving it to clatter on the curb. He rubbed her back as she heaved. "Coach is gunna have the shits if he finds out you pushed yourself to the point of spewing again."

"Well, what he doesn't know won't hurt him will it?" she chided as she wiped her mouth and walked over to the bike, taking a drink from the water bottle and rinsing her mouth.

"But it might hurt you babe," he said holding her by the waist with both hands, his eyes conveying his concern.

"Jake it'll be ok. That was the last run I'll do before I go to the Pac12's anyway. I'll be alright." She reached up to kiss him. "I love it when you get all protective." she said as her lips met his.

"Ew yuck Ness." He said, his face contorting. "You taste like sick." She giggled her hands slapping against her mouth, giggling. "Oh man, I'm sorry. I didn't realise." She sloshed more of the water around in her mouth spitting it out. "I guess there's defiantly no secrets between us now."

"Yeah, no, none." He smiled as he picked up his bike and they walked into the hall.

At the start of the school year, Ness had paid for the entire semester of accommodation and even though she wasn't living there any more, she still had access to the facilities in McCarthy Hall. She had taken to using the showers and her old room to change in after training. Jake lay on Ness' old bed and flicked through one of Bella's Cosmos while Ness showered. He liked looking at the pictures mainly, but the sealed sections made for some very interesting reading.

Today he flicked through the pages and found a juicy article of what goes on backstage at the annual Victoria's Secrets show, that Victoria made some very agreeable clothes. Jake loved it when Ness got out of her practical sports bras and went with a little bit of lace and cleavage.

He looked at his watch and noted they had half an hour before Renesmee's lecture on Anatomy and Physiology 2. His thoughts turned to some of Ness' anatomy and the time he'd seen her dressing in this very room, her tits bouncing in her simple white bra that first time they'd met. And how good her legs looked as she squeezed her way into those jeans. She covered those amazing legs up too much. He was looking forward to summer and seeing her in shorts more often.

Ness re-entered the dorm room clean and fresh and wearing a sundress, her long legs on display for him to admire. Jake looked at Renesmee, his eyes undressing her as she leaned over her bag, packing away her towel and clothes. He wanted to find out exactly what kind of bra she had changed into. His dick twitched as he fantasised it was something resembling Victoria's. He checked his watch, making sure he'd read the time right. _Yep. Half an hour_.

Bella was at class and Jake had been reading Cosmo and Renesmee was wearing a dress and he loved her legs and she had almost half an hour until her lecture and she was wearing a dress and maybe she had on that lace bra he liked and she was wearing a dress.

She took one look at his eyes and she knew where his thought were headed. She stood across the room from him, her eyes piercing back into his, she was focused. He saw her lips part marginally, her posture changed just slightly, her chest was pushed forward, her hip, a little to the side. The switch from focused athlete to passionate woman was flicked. His bold, confident ego was actuated.

"I have never fucked you in this room." He said in a very mater-of-fact way. "I thought about it many, many times. But I have never actually had you naked between the sheets of this here bed." He said as he leant up on to his elbows.

Ness slinked over to him, she moistened her lips with her tongue, the way she knew he liked. "Well we'll have to rectify that little oversight wont we?" she said as she unzipped the side of her dress. Jake covered her hands with his. "Let me." He rumbled as he sat up on the side of the bed, running his hands over her side. His hands moulded over her contours, setting her alight, the electricity zapping between them through the cotton.

His hands brushed past her breast as he found purchase on the hidden zipper and he slowly lowered the tangs, exposing her side and letting the shoulder of the dress fall. He ran is hands along the edge of the scooped neck and his fingers wound underneath the material as he pulled and lowered the dress off her chest and over her hips in till it fell in a puddle at her feet. "You should were dresses more often," he said as he stood up to stand with her. He lent towards her, blowing into her ear. "I like taking them off of you."

His hands wound around her back as he nuzzled her neck and kissed along her collarbone. His fantasies were realised to find she had on a very sheer white lace bra with matching panties. He ran his fingers over the edge of the lace, his fingers burning as they caressed her skin. The bra gave her a little lift and Jake couldn't help but burry his face into the valley of cleavage. He was very happy.

He reached for her bra and easily unclasped it. Easing it off her shoulders and letting her fall out. His hands massaging and fondling her breasts as she attempted to get his t-shirt up over his head. He helped her, breaking contact with her nipples only for a second, no sooner was the t-shirt off and his hands were on her again. Her head flung back involuntary as sensual moan escaped her lips as he bent down and took her breast into his mouth. She ran her hands up and down his muscular back revelling in the width and hardness of his musculature. Her hands ran over his arms and shoulders.

She loved his shoulders, the way her hands curved over them, the way the muscle bunched as he moved. Her fingers grazed over his nipples and down to the corrugated ripples of his six pack. She felt his stomach harden as she glided over his sides and down to the button of his jeans. She flicked the press stud with her thumb and let his own need force the fly down.

Both had their hands on the others waist bands, endeavouring to tug each other's pants off. As Ness' panties fell to her knees, Jake tuned her, pulling back the coverlet on the bed and lay her down. He kicked off his pants and lay alongside her. "See, naked between these sheets." He said, satisfied with himself. Ness reached down between his legs and grasped him firmly. She began to stroke him as she feathered kisses along his face. She kissed his lips, thrusting her tongue into his mouth. His deep satisfied moan spurring her on. "See, no sick taste now? I brushed my teeth." She smiled as she kissed him again, her mouth moulding to his.

"You taste very good." He said. His fingers reaching to her centre and running along her folds. "You taste good everywhere." He said as he licked her natural lube off his fingers. He ran his tongue along the ridges of her ear and kissing behind it.

Ness breathed a long shuddering breath as a sudden memory and idea came to her. "You remember the first night you slept in this bed with me." She prompted. Jake nodded as his tongue grazed down her neck to her breasts. "Uh ha, how could I forget?"

"We were supposed to sleep head to toe." She said and she leant forwards and shifted to her side, pressing Jake onto his back. She bent up and kneeled half way along the bed, her knees by his hips. She leaned over, her mouth grazing along his shaft. "Maybe we could try it now." She whispered as she sucked his member into her mouth, her tongue doing circles around him as he started to moan and cuss.

He opened his eyes and saw her long hair as it spilled down her back resting just above the little dimples she had just above her ass. He could see her head bobbing up and down as her hot lips sucked his length. She had gotten very good at pleasuring him and knew exactly how much and how fast he like it. He felt a fresh surge as he watched her lips as they stretched around him, she looked up at him through her long lashes, part of her hair falling across her face and he almost let go inside her mouth. Ness lent forwards to take more of him in her mouth and he moaned with delight. "Oh fuck." His eyes rolling back in his head. She was taking all of him in her mouth, so wet and hot. _Fucking amazing_.

The way she was leaning he could see her pink folds opening up to him. He wanted to taste her, he liked her idea; head to toe in the best kind of way. He hooked his fingers around her hips and pulled her up closer to him, flipping her to her side. He nestled his face between her legs and rested his head on her inner thigh. He lifted his mouth to her opening and licked one long stroke up her slit. She let out a high pitched squeal, muffled by the large cock in her mouth. He flicked and sucked her bud, his tongue darting in and out of her hot well. She moaned and squirmed in response to his attentions. He loved the way he could bring out that response. Only _he_ had ever made her feel that way and he revelled in doing it to her. She continued to suck and draw him, licking the pre-cum off his head as he lapped at her folds and tasted her sex.

Jakes fingers entered her as she approached her climax. He pressed into her g-spot as he drank in her wetness. Her body convulsing around his fingers.

Panting and coming back down from her sexual high, she ran her tongue along his shaft and carefully took his balls into her mouth. Gently sucking and mouthing, Jake felt the tightening in his loins as he neared his own finish line. She took him into her mouth again and her hot lips gild up and down a few more times until Jake pulled himself out. He wanted all of her. He swung himself around and pressed Ness onto her back, spreading his body on top of hers. His knees parted her legs and he entered her in one smooth long motion.

Ness was still receding form her own climax and the feeling of his thick hard dick inside her brought on the beginning of a fresh wave of pleasure. Jacob thrust into her again and again, he lifter her legs up and wrapped his hands around her ankles forcing her legs apart as far as his arms could reach. In and out her lunged, getting a measured rhythm going that cumulated in him letting go of her legs, leaning forward and pressing his mouth to hers. His lips muffling her screams of pleasure, his own cries of desire lost in her breath as they both found their peak together. Hot sweaty bodies pressed together, joined as one as they shared a carnal kind of slumber party.

Several minutes after they had caught their breaths and Ness was lying huddled in his arms, happy to just be there in the moment with him, she lifted Jakes arm of her breast, bring his wrist to her eye level to look at his watch. She jumped up squeaking, the relaxed atmosphere of post-coital satisfaction gone. "Shit Jake! The lecture's already started."

They both scrambled to throw on their clothes and vainly tried to make the bed. The couple raced to the lecture hall in time for the professor to begin lecturing on the Traumatic Patient and the importance of a thorough head to toe assessment.

Jake thought Ness already had that subject in the bag

* * *

The Pacific 12 school champs were in California, at USC again. This time round though, at the instance of her coach, Ness went with the team on the university bus. Jake stayed home in Washington and the love birds spent four days and three whole nights apart. They had to keep telling themselves it was for the best. They couldn't really afford another hotel room or the cost to fly or even drive. It was torture though; being away from each other. But it really was worth it in the end. Ness shined. She blitzed the field in her heats and the finals were looking very promising.

Her excitement was dampened however, always doused by the looming threat of violence or implied terror. While Ness was away she tried desperately - even just a little- to let go of her fears of the covert intruder into her life. There were even some moments she would forget about him –whoever her was- for several hours at a time, but never completely. The nights were the worst. Without Jake next to her the bed seamed cold, but worst still, her imagination would get the better of her. Every time there was a noise in the hallway outside or a shadow passing through the light filtering under the door she, would freeze in under her covers. At one point, at about two thirty am the night before her final, she had been gript by such a terror she'd called Jake.

He answered the phone half asleep but had woken up fully when he realised it was Nessie on the other line. Once she had relaxed enough to speak in full sentences, the pair lay in their beds halfway across the country, phones pressed to their ears chatting about nothing and listening to one another breathe. Ness lay in her cold hotel bed, wishing for Jacobs arms around her until she drifted off to sleep.

She woke the next morning with the phone still tucked up under her cheek. She looked on the screen, the call was still live, the timer showed 4hours and 37min. Ness listen to the earpiece and could still here Jakes breathing on the other end. She'd woken up next to him.

The morning of her final Ness met up with Solomon, Chris and Darcy who were also competing at the preliminaries. Solomon and Chris were undeclared so they were slumming it on campus with Ness. Darcy had been sponsored for his long jumping abilities by Nike since freshman year so he was staying in a nicer hotel but he still made his way to the breakfast hall at USC to sit with his friends.

They all made their way to the stadium together. Only Solomon and Ness were competing on that last day of events. Chris had placed forth in the men's pole vault, he'd have to wait and see what heights the other regions produced before he knew if he was through to Nationals. Darcy was, as always, the consummate professional athlete, he jumped a U Dub record and placed second, he was headed to Eugene in June.

Before Ness could compete in the women's hurdles finals the men's 110, 200 and 400 metre hurdles all to be run first and Ness was a bundle of nerves waiting for her event. She sat in the bleachers between her team mates, her legs shaking out their nervous energy. Last year this was as far as she'd advanced and this year she wanted to do well. She wanted it bad.

"God, will you sit still, you're shaking the bolts out of these here seats." Complained Darcy. Ness stilled her legs. It was no good, she was still as nervous as shit. And watching Solomon was only making it worse. "I'm going for a walk." She said getting up and clanking her way over the aluminium seating. Chris stood to go with her. "What are you doing?" Ness asked.

"I'm coming with you." He said.

"No you're not." She said, just wanting to run off her nervous energy alone.

"Yes I am. I promised Jake. We're all keeping an eye out for you."

"What?" She sulked down to the steps that lead to the lower half of the seating. "When did you promise Jake?"

"I don't know," he said, remembering his very forward conversation with her boyfriend all those weeks ago. "At the Stanford Classic."

"That same classic where you told him to stop fucking me?"

"He told you that?"

"Not in those exact words, but I know how you talk."  
"Oh… Sorry. But it's worked hasn't it?"

Ness looked at her friend letting out a defeated sigh. "Yes. Oh mighty Chris, God of Sex always knows best." she raised her hands above her head and mock bowed to his 6 foot 3inch height.

He smiled his sexy smile she'd seen him try on other girls before. "You think I'm a sex god?"

Ness just rolled her eyes and turned away mumbling. "Oh my Lord." Her head shaking in disbelief at his never ending arrogance.

"What? You said it."

"I was being sarcastic, you douche."

"Oh," he said, his head tilted to the side with mouth agape like a troglodyte. Ness just laughed as they walked over to the second warm up track.

"You want to jog with me? I have to do… something." She said as she set off round the tartan. Chris kept pace.

After a few laps of the oval Ness assumed she should be feeling more relaxed and they stopped running, she didn't want to push herself too much more before the final. In reality she was as tense as ever but at least she'd been able to direct some of the energy outwards before it could mess up her hurdling technique.

They walked back up to the team area and they sat and watched as Solomon hurdled. All of the men's heat's had been pretty even timed and it would be an interesting final. Solomon paced third in the 200m hurdles, earning him a minor qualification. He was going on a road trip to Oregon too.

Before long, Ness checked the time again and decided to go stretch and head to the marshalling area early.

She wanted to call Jake before her race. Hear his voice. Ground herself with the sound of his breath. Dose herself up on his love. So she phoned him while she sat under a shade tent stretching.

"Hey sweetheart. You warming up?" he answered.

"Yeah." She replied.

"That 'ill be five fifty." He said into the phone.

"You working today?"

"Thank you, see you next week… How'd you know?" he snorted. She felt her chest relax as she heard the familiar, deep rumble of his laugh. "I fell asleep on the phone last night." He added

"I know, so did I. Lucky we have free calls to each other." She breathed in a deep cleansing breath, as if his voice on the line could fill her. "I miss you." She said on the exhale.

"I miss you too. You'll be home tomorrow, don't worry."

"I know, but I still miss you. I just wanted to hear your voice before the final. Help centre me. Help me focus."

"Yeah, I know how to focus on your centre." he said sarcastically.

Ness laughed. "Don't be an ass. You know what I mean. You're my other half."

"Your _better_ half don't you mean?"

Ness heaved a sigh at him. "Jake, I'm serious. I just wanted to hear your voice. Listen to your breathing, like last night. It helps me run better."

"I know babe, I'm just playing. Listen all you want. Whatever you need to kick some butt out there."

"Thank you," she said as he was silent on the other end.

Renesmee could hear his breathing as he held the phone with his chin. She could hear the click of the turnstile as people entered the pool, the faint beep as he scanned swimmers membership cards. She imagined him standing in his flip flops, those florescent orange-red Baywatch shorts looking amazingly good against his tanned skin.

She pictured him smiling and nodding hellos at swimmers as they entered the complex, his white t-shirt stretched over his arms and shoulders, the words 'life guard' written along his broad back. She couldn't wait to get home and strip that t-shirt off of him.

She wasn't sure if she'd call it grounded, but he was right, she was certainly feeling something in her centre.

After a few more minutes of hearing his breath and listening to him going about his working day Ness said, "Ok. I'm focused enough now. I got to go marshal."

"Ok babe. Good luck. Explode out of those blocks. Get that lead leg down fast. Run like your running home to me."

"I love you." She said, feeling like the luckiest girl alive.

"Love you too. Bring home some gold."

"I will. I'll call you after ok."

"Ok."

"Bye" she hung up feeling much better about life. Ready to run and as Jake put it, '_Bring home the gold_.'

She placed first in the final, earning her some gold to bring home and also a qualification to the National Champs in Oregon. They were being held in Eugene, Oregon this year, Track Town. It was so exciting to think she'd be competing at the home of Nike, on one of the oldest tracks in the USA, it was like going to Mecca for an athlete, almost. For Ness, her mecca was back working in a pool in Washington and she was on a pilgrimage to him.

The team bus set off the next day for the long drive back up to Seattle. When the bus finally arrived back at the university grounds night had fallen already. Ness was first off the bus and straight in to Jakes waiting arms.

They were driving home when Ness suddenly pointed to a side street and ordered him to pull over. Before Jake could get the hand break on Ness was out of her seat and straddling him where he sat. She was like a wild woman, seeing food for the first time in days. Except Jake was the meal. He couldn't help but respond quickly to her kisses. Her mouth was pressed hard on to his, her tongue probing and flicking. Her body hot as she pressed into him, her hips bucking through her clothes.

Jake realised with carnal delight that she was wearing skirt as she reached down to undo his belt, pulling him out and straight into her. _She not wearing any underpants! Did she plan this? Oh my fucking god. I am one lucky mother fucker. _Ness impaled herself, pressing herself down around Jake. His heat and harness filling her with what she so desperately need. She kept kissing him as she bounced up and down on his lap. His hands reaching up under the cardigan and cotton tank she had on. He felt over her bare back searching for the bra strap he was never going to find.

All Ness could think about on the way home had been Jacob. His face, his eyes, his hair, his hands. His fucking astounding body and all the incredible things it could make her feel. When the bus had stopped for gas about two hours out of Seattle, Ness had used the opportunity to prepare for her little 'home coming' with Jake. She'd taken off her underwear and made sure she sat cross-armed and cross-legged the last few hours back. She'd been waiting for the past two hours. The rubber band of sexual tension was pulled so tight it was cutting into her hand. When it recoiled it was going to hit hard. She was so ready. She hoped Jake was too.

His hands only found bare skin as they moved from her back across her ribs to her breasts. "You are so sexy." He said in husky voice as he gently pinched her nipples. "Have you been planning this all day?" He asked against her lips as she continued to move on him.

She wound her arms around his neck, her elbows resting on his shoulders. Her breathing was accelerated as she managed to say "Just the last few hours. Now shut up and fuck me." He didn't need telling twice.

He pushed her cardigan off her arms and lifted her shirt up over her head. He bent down and his mouth found a nipple, she moaned a deep growl like sound as he sucked. Her pink bud turning a deep red as he drew the blood to the surface. His hands found her waist and he relished in the illicit rush of public sex when he felt the material of her skirt still hanging on her hips, her flesh bare and exposed underneath. He guided her up and he let her crash back down onto him until he filled her channel completely.

His hands grabbed around her ass. His fingers fanning on her cheeks, holding on to the supple milky skin. Guiding and lifting her until Ness found her release. She slammed down onto him. Her body shuddering around him. Jake lifted her for a few more strokes before he too was caught up his own pleasure.

After it was over, they both sat, their sweaty bodies glistening in the moonlight. Renesmee had her face pressed against Jakes temple. Her breaths loud and hot in his ear. "I really missed you." She said in a breathless whisper.

"I think you need to go away for a few days more often, if that's the hello I'm gunna get."

"Next time you're coming with me so I won't have to wait for the entire trip back home."

Spent, Renesmee fell back into her seat, pulling her clothes back on. She lent her head on Jakes shoulder as they drove the rest of the way back to Redmond. Jake was still carrying her suitcase up stairs when Ness pounce on him once more, the luggage was left at the top if the stairs for the rest of the night. They made up for their three nights apart very soundly. But defiantly not soundlessly. The snapping of that rubber band was loud.

* * *

**That was pure unadulterated Smut. Hope you enjoyed!**

**Loving the reviews BTW**


	30. Chapter 30 Eugine

It was summer break and Renesme had survived her second year of nursing school. The following fortnight was the start of the NCAA's. Renesmee was officially declared. Kitted out in all her new Nike clothing she hopped on the plane with a ticket that had been paid for by her sponsor. She stayed in the hotel Nike paid for and ate the food the Nike employed chefs prepared. She was hitting the big leagues. And Jake was beside her all the way.

Darcy and Kate were staying in the same hotel as Ness and Jake too. Financially, Darcy and Kate were there also in the same position as Ness and Jake. The sponsorship money only paid for the athlete, never a plus one. Kate had wanted to be there for Darcy just a Jake wanted to be there for Ness. They saved their money so that the always supportive partners could afford to fly down with them for the big event. The Outdoor Track and Field National Championships of the National College Athletic Association. The NCAA's.

The day before the Championships started the couple flew into Eugene. Ness was ready to compete. She'd had a great prep.

Focused. Fit.

And completely Un-Fucked.

Jake had bought her a set of very unsexy PJ's to help keep the abstinence thing going for the trip. There was something about a hotel room and the allure of the thick starched sheets that made him want to strip her down naked every chance he got. But he was going to be good.

Ness, on the other hand had bought herself some very sexy pyjamas- if you'd call them that, they were more like lingerie than PJ's. She was going along with the no sex thing, but boy was she going to be ready when the finals were done.

The hotel they were staying in was not far from the Hayward filed but too far to walk. Jake hired a little Ford Focus to get him back and forwards over the four day event seeing as he couldn't go on the team bus. He often found himself ferrying Kate too. They were the personal cheer squad for their partners. It was good for Jake to talk to someone about the difficulties of being with an elite athlete, the restriction they paced on themselves. The levels they pushed themselves to. The expectations they placed on themselves and the plummeting dejection if they failed.

Renesmee's heat and semi were both on the first day of competitions. It was a Wednesday, a mild summer day in June, the main student body was on summer vacation and the majority of the crowd were there for the champs. The carnival was televised online, and Jake had made sure Billy knew when to be watching it from La Push. In fact, Jake's dad had made an event of it. Inviting all of Jakes friends and a few of his own, he got Embry to hook up the TV to a laptop so everyone could sit around the screen. And that was just for the preliminary races.

Darcy didn't have his event until the afternoon, so to be supportive, both he and Kate went with Jake to watch Ness compete, Solomon had his heat after Ness' too. The cheer squad arrived about half an hour before the race, marching up the grandstand and then Jake made them all sneak their way to the front. He wanted to sit in his special seat. Twenty feet from the finish line and no more than five rows back. It was kind of his lucky spot and he was more superstitious about it than Ness. They sat down between some kids from Arizona State and an elderly couple.

Jake could see her in the marshalling area. There was upbeat music playing over the loud speakers in between races. The big screen was showing live footage from the stadium, the cameras were scanning over the crowd and athletes who were warming up in between screening the events. The sports grounds had a real fun feel about it. From his position, Jake could see Ness scanning the crowd looking for him but the place was packed. Finally with the trio waving like idiots, Renesmee saw them and waved back. Jake blew her a kiss and Ness caught it and pretended to put it in her top pocket. The TV cameras saw it. Their private moment was splashed across the stadium screen. _He saw it too._

After their little public display, the camera seemed to follow Ness as she set up her starting blocks. She looked like both a professional athlete on the track with the prominent swoosh gracing her warm up clothes and the definitive pin up student athlete with her tight white and purple U Dub singlet and short boy cut shorts, but most importantly she was hurdling like a professional too.

Ness thought it was weird seeing herself on the screen as she was running. She tried to avoid looking at the display. Jake on the other hand, couldn't stop looking at her. He felt like yelling 'that's my girlfriend' at any one who'd listen. He didn't though. He just cheered and yelled from the sidelines as she won her heat easily, pulling up at the end, still with a time of 12.73. That put her in fourth spot for the semi-finals. They were scheduled in the afternoon.

Darcy's initial round of long jump was about an hour before Ness's semi. She had been watching from the warm up area as he did his thing. She watched as he set his run up and sped down the tartan, flying through the air and landing with long legs stretched. Seeing him land in the sand made Ness miss the event a little. She knew it had been the right choice to focus on one event from a coaching point of view, but she still missed the sand. Either way, here she was, warming up at the NCAA's, with a realistic aim of a medal. It was times like these that she missed Sophie. She would have had some sort of encouraging words for Rouge-gorge; they would have been in French of course, but the French only seemed to make it more special and personal.

Ness ran her semi-final. She ran a personal best. 12.45 She pulled up just before the line slowing as the girl from Duke on her left surged her chest forward and just beat her at the line. Ness qualified second for the final. She was dirty though, she'd wanted to qualify first. She complained the whole car ride home, Jake listening with tongue in cheek.

"Well, you shouldn't have slowed down before the line."

"I know, I was trying to conserve energy." she whined

"I think you're conserving enough energy just staying full clothed at night." He grumbled, running his hands along her thigh, bare in her sports shorts.

"It's two more nights' baby, you can do it. Cold showers and I'll give you some time alone with Mrs Palmer if you need it." She giggled. Jake looked sideways over at her from the driver's seat.

"I'll be ok." He laughed. "You just need to stop running around in such short shorts. Granny undies and baggy pants as soon as we get back to the hotel, Dr Jakes orders."

"Ooh Dr Jake? You gunna give me a physical?" she breathed.

"Ness are you trying to kill me?" he moaned "You can be a real cock tease some times."

"I'm sorry babe, I'm just teasing you." She soothed, leaning over and rubbing her hands along his chest and down, further south.

"That's right, you're a very big _tease_!" he cackled, picking her hand up off his pants and placing then safely on her own leg.

"Ok! I'll be good. I can behave for the next 48 hours."

"You might have to be good for about the next 55 hours actually. Kate wants us all to go out for diner after everyone's fished on Friday, regardless of results. So, we'll either be celebrating or stoping someone from wallowing."

"Oh, I'll be celebrating." she assured. "I can feel it in my bones." She closed her eyes and a tiny excited shiver spread over her. "I can't believe I'm here Jake. With an actual chance of being a National Champion. The World Champs are in Australia this year. In Sydney. Do you reckon we can save enough for us to go by August?"

"We'll make sure we can. I'll make sure we do. But, you're not superstitious talking about what's next before you've run the final?"  
"A little, I guess I should come back a few steps. Grand-mère always used to tell me to not count my chickens before they'd hatched. Well, what she'd really say was '_vendre la peau de l'ours avant de l'avoir tué' _that means to not sell the bear's skin before killing it. But that's just gross." She chuckled at the memory.

"You miss her." He said as a fact rather than a question.

"Every day. But at these sort of big things, it's a bit worse. I was just thinking before the race actually, how she'd have had some kind of French words of encouragement today."

She looked over at Jake, he had on some very sexy aviator sunglasses as he drove them into the setting western sun, his hair was loosely pulled back into a low pony tail, his tan t-shirt blending in with his russet skin. His muscular calves shooting out from his cut-off jeans. It was him who was here for her now, no one else was sitting by her side. He was her rock, her gravity. He was her encouragement now. Her other half. Her Jake.

"Thank you for being here for me." She said. "I don't tell you 'thank you' enough."

He laced his fingers between hers. He lifted his sunnies on to his head and looked at her. His deep dark eyes, the windows to his glorious soul, were shining. "There's no were else in this big wide world that I'd want to be, than right here next to you." He gave her hand a little shake to emphasise his words. "You don't have to thank me. You give me everything I want just by existing and breathing and loving me too. Besides, you'd do the same for me, right?"

"Yeah of course, but I still want to say thank you though."

"Well, you're welcome then." He nodded, smirking as they turned into the hotel. "If only you could think of a way to show me just how grateful you are!"

"Jake!" she hooted, playfully shoving him. "I've got to find those granny undies."

* * *

Ness was free the next day so, the whole group went to the Field early the next morning to watch Chris in the pole vault, it was a long event, going for most of the day. It could be so confusing to watch sometimes though, a dozen guys would have vaulted and you thought you'd known who was in the lead and then the actual medal contenders would start their _first_ vault. They'd been waiting and conserving energy until the bar was raised much higher. It was a game of tactic and skill.

Chris was a real expert in getting the crowd involved. He was also a camera hoe. He'd start up clapping. Turning to the crowd with pole in hand, doing big overhead slaps until a large section of the stand was clapping for him. It was uplifting to witness. And it certainly seemed to lift Chris up, he placed seventh overall. Considering it was his first time beyond a State Championship, he did exceptionally well to even get in the top twenty.

Sometime during the day, Renesmee's coach received a phone call from Nike. One of the editors of a running magazine wanted to do a bio of Ness. Apparently they'd seen her races and liked what they saw. They wanted a few photos taken too. Jake thought that maybe they'd seen her in her racing two piece and liked what they saw... but part of being sponsored by a company was to represent that company. And Nike wanted her in the quarterly.

When Jake voiced his concerns, Ness argued that it was for a legitimate running enthusiast's magazine and it wasn't as if she was posing for play boy.

'Cause that definitely would not be happening.

The magazine organised the photos shoot the next day. The day of the Final. They were going to be taking some candid 'action' shots of her before and during the race. And then some more set up photos after the race. The one thing both Ness and Jake agreed on was when it came to the interview, Ness was going to have a final say on what information was published about her. With a random stalker on the loose, the last thing she needed was him finding out any more stuff about her. It seemed she was going to have to create a distinct public image, only imparting with information she was happy to share and keep her private life… private. Even if it was only for a budding interest bio.

* * *

The final was around midday and Jake was sitting in his usual seat with his bag and jacket on the seats next to him saving a space for two more people. Bella wanted to surprise her by driving down for the weekend. Edward had flown in to Seattle after exams and the two drove the four hours down to watch Ness race. Jake and Bella schemed to keep their visit from Ness, wanting to surprise her. Jake's phone rang and he fished it out of his pocket.

"Hey," Jake answered.

"We're here. We couldn't find a park. We're not too late are we?"  
"No, there's another ten minutes still. I'm in row five near the finish line, I saved you a seat."

"Ok, we're coming up now." Said Bella hanging up. Jake turned in his seat looking over to the stairs leading into the stands. He waved as he saw Edwards tall head appear and Ed waved, pointing Jake out to Bella. Jake watched as Bella shuffled her way through the seats, stepping on toes and tripping over people's feet. Her calls of apology waving through the row as she slowly progressed. _What a klutz._

As she approached the saved seats, Jake moved his stuff off just in time for Bella to fall onto them. Jake cackled as his friend's clumsiness. "I hope you've got everything you want because there's no way you're getting back out in time for the race." He looked down the row, appraising the wake of destruction Bells left behind. "All those poor people, I bet they'll all have bruised toes tomorrow." He turned to greet Edwards shaking his hand. "How the hell to you walk side by side with her and not break an ankle is beyond me." Edwards chuckled, knowing his girlfriend well enough not to comment.

They settled into their seats and Bella lifted up looking to the start line. "Were is she?"

Jake leaned in and pointed to the marshal area. "She's the one with the grey and orange track suit on. She's stretching."

Ness was warming up next to the track, trying really hard to ignore the photographer taking photos as she stretched. She was sitting on the grass, her lead leg out in front, leaning her nose into her knee when her cell beeped with a message, she fished it out of her bag and read the text.

*_Bonne chance, ma jolie Rouge-gorge. X Jake*_

_Thank you baby_ she thought as she tucked the phone in to her chest, smiling a private smile. It was exactly what she needed. He'd sent her word of encouragement in French. _How did he do that? _He really was her soul mate, her gravity.

Feeling firmly attached to the Earth and also as light as a feather and ready to fly over those hurdles, Ness dutifully ignored the camera and undressed. Today she had on a small gold and purple panelled crop top and the matching running briefs. Her name and registration number pinned to her chest. She knew the photographer was snapping away, she didn't check, but she guessed the stadium camera was watching too, judging by the noise in the crowd when she'd pulled her polo over her head, exposing the top of her chest and her midriff. At least she knew she looked good in it. She'd seen photos of herself in action and even Ness had to admit it was pretty impressive the way her six pack showed when she was powering over a hurdle.

She knew she was lean, with very little body fat apart from a little still on her hips and her ever present boobs. Hell, she had such little body fat this summer season that her period had stopped all together. She recalled her panic when she'd first noticed it had been seven weeks since she'd last menstruated, Jake had nearly had a coronary. They had run out to the pharmacy to get a home pregnancy test. When it had come back negative, a very relieved Renesmee had made an appointment with the Athletic Team Doctor. She had reassured Nessie that it was very normal to go months without a period when your BMI was as low as Nessie's had been over the last few months.

Snapping back to the present, she bent over making sure her laces were done up right on her spikes and the crowd roared again. She closed her eyes blocking out the sound and she made her way to the start line. She just ignored all the attention. Only one set of eyes really got to see her. Those dark brown almost black eyes were the only ones that mattered. She looked through the crowds. Her gaze moving along the rows until she was him. He was looking straight at her. She couldn't see his face clearly but she imagined him smiling at her, sending her a vibe of love and encouragement. As always it was a balm to her soul. _Someone else was staring at her too, but she didn't see his gaze from the other side of the stadium._

Still looking towards Jakes favourite seat, she saw someone wildly waving next to him and beamed when she realised was Bella and Edward. She gestured in question with her arms. _When did they get here? _She was answered with Bella jumping up from her seat, her arms open wide in a 'surprise!' like gesticulation. She wondered if Jake was in on the surprise. She looked back to him and he was still looking straight at her. She blew him a kiss and he caught it. Then he blew her one back to her and she stashed it in her pretend pocket. The photographer caught it too. _He _wasn't happy about her public display of affection in next to no clothes on. _He'd have to do something about that. _

* * *

Moving to stand in her lane, she closed her eyes, her thoughts now only about the race and waiting for that whistle. She concentrated on her breath, listening to herself in- and then exhale. She opened her eyes when she heard the shrill sound of the starters signal. Looking down her lane she could see row after row of white and blue lined hurdles. The words '_NCAA'_ printed across the top. Ness counted the hurdles. _One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. _Then her eyes lowered to the red tartan and she knelt down. Looking down and underneath her, she pressed the balls of her feet into the blocks. She sat up, flicking her braid behind her. She looked up into the crowd, towards where she knew Jake was. She couldn't see him from her crouched angle, but she knew he was watching. And that he loved her. And that she loved him.

She leant back down, her fingers supporting her weight, she aligned them just before the white line. The starter called 'set'. She lifted up, her body weight shifting back to her feet and she waited. The gun went. She pushed off and sprinted in a forward leaning position for a few steps, then she was upright, springing to the first hurdle. Her legs cleared it and her foot hit the track as if there had never been and interruption to her cadence. She counted as she ran. She always did it. _Seven.., eight.., nine.., ten. _Seven more steps and she crossed the line. She didn't pull up before the finish line today. She powered over that solid mark, all her blood sweat and tears in those last few steps. There was nothing in front of her. Not one person in front. She'd won. _I won._

The yells and whistles coming from the fifth row were loud. Edward had never seen her hurdle before and was duly impressed. Bella was squealing like a school girl, pointing to the track screaming. "That's my roommate! Woo-Hoo Ness!"

Jake was so proud, so happy, so in love with that girl. She was smiling that amazing smile that he loved, it was perfect, but there was nothing fake about it, she was truly happy. Even before the times were up, her eyes looked up to his and he knew she could read that love emanating from him. He mouthed the words "I love you." She smiled and lifted her arm up out stretched. She made a motion like she was fluttering little wings with her hands. "I flew" she mouthed. Jake nodded. He got it. Rouge-gorge, little red robin- had soared.

* * *

Jake didn't get a chance to properly congratulate his girlfriend straight away. After the race she was ushered to the official's office for a drug screen. And once that was done, she had only enough time to change her shoes and throw on her track pants and polo shirt and then it was time for the medal presentation. Jacob managed to worm his way down to the ground level and was roughly in line with the dais. Ness was searching the grand stand. Her eyes scanning over the seats. Jake yelled to her across the track, earning himself a dirty look form an official looking lady with a tight bun.

"Ness!" Her head shot around and she caught sight of him. Her eyes glistened as she beamed at him. He blew her a kiss and she pretended to catch it inconspicuously. She was presented a bunch of flowers before her medal. Jake decided to get her some flowers tonight or maybe tomorrow, he didn't buy her flowers often enough.

After the anthem, she jumped off the podium and jogged across to him. "Congratulations baby." He said as she fell into his open arms. "You did it."

"We did it love. You put almost as much blood sweat and tears in as me." She amended.

"But I wouldn't look nearly as good in a two piece." She laughed as she leaned in to him breathing in his smell. This is what she'd been needing. This is what attached her to the earth. Him.

She grazed her lips along his collar bone. Exhaling, "I so want to get you into a lot less than a two piece." She moaned. "But I have that dam photo shoot now."

"Can I come watch?" He asked as he flung his arm over her shoulder, picking up her training bag.

"I don't see why not. You can watch me strut my stuff!" she scoffed. "This is really ridiculous though. What the hell are they gunna, make me do? You'd think they have enough photos already! That bloody photographer has been in my face all day."

"Maybe he has a little crush on you." Said Jake jokingly.

"Maybe!" teased Ness, her voice suggestive and her eyebrows wiggling. Jake thought about some perv watching her though a zoom lens as Ness sat in her racing briefs and his humour evaporated.

He pulled her in close and looked around them, "I'm defiantly coming to watch, don't want you strutting any stuff to anyone but me." He said possessively. She entwined her hands with his, looking through the crowd ahead. "Where's Bella?"

"They're still up the top. I think they wanted to watch a few more events. I gave Ed directions to the bar, they'll meet us there tonight."

The photo shoot took place on the empty grandstand of the training tack. They had her in her Washington track suit and then she had to change into a few different Nike training clothes. Jake could see she was weirded-out by posing for the camera. A few times she looked over to him and he'd pull some random face making her laugh. At one point he gave her his best 'Blue Steal' behind the photographer's head and she cracked up. The camera clicked, capturing her joy.

_He_ watched from the bushes_. She looks beautiful. The imbecile won't stop pulling stupid faces at her and she's laughing at them. Why would she find that funny? She's smarter than that. I could make her laugh, but I'd be saying something witty. Stupid Muck. _He stood and sulked his way to his car, waiting to follow her when she left the sporting ground.

The whole afternoon was very casual. Jake was comforted that there was nothing overtly sexual about it, or nothing requiring her to bare too much skin. It turned out that they really just wanted to photograph Ness because of her abilities and rising prominence and Jake guessed her looks made it an added bonus too. They ended up roping Jake into a few photos. They sat and waited as the photographer changed lenses. He sat just behind her in the stands, her body nestled against his. His arms draped forwards over her shoulders as he lent into talk quietly into her ear. "Do you know how very proud I am? It is a privilege to be a part of your life Miss Masen." He whispered. Ness smiled, her eyes closing as she let the feeling of his love and security wash over her. She looked back over her shoulder at him, reaching up for a stolen kiss. "The pleasure is all mine Jacob Black." She said, the conviction vehement in her beautiful green eyes. Little did the couple know, the photographer had caught this candid moment. Their love captured, ready to be printed on the glossy pages of the magazine.

* * *

**Happy New Year! I'm aiming for 100 review by the next chapter. Pleeease.**

**Jakes message to Ness before the race: ****_Good luck, my beautiful Red Robin._**

**Yeah Ness! Our little champ. See... abstinence before competition does pay off! ;-)**

**Stalker creep is getting ready to say hello too. I'll update really soon, like, Saturday.**

**Keep on enjoying. M**


	31. Chapter 31 Friends in Low Places

**Ok, so this chapter is not for the kiddies... or for the squeamish. **

**I have been assured that it's not too graphic but please keep in mind my day/night job is a paramedic and I sometimes forget what a normal level of 'too much information' is. I ****_think_**** I got the right amount here.**

**This Chapter should answer a lot of questions but then get you asking some new ones. Enjoy! **

* * *

The afternoon sun was shining as the shoot came to an end. There were dark clouds rolling in from the East and it was so humid, Jake could tell a storm was on its way. Ness was happily sorting through the pile of sample clothes she had scored for her troubles when Jake's phone buzzed with a message from Kate.

*_Ready to party? Darcy got silver and we're all headed to Running Pete's now. K8*_

"Looks like Darcy's going to Sydney too." said Jake as he read the message.

"I just want to change in to some regular clothes then we can go." said Ness as they walked over to the dressing rooms.

Jake sat down on the bench outside as Ness handed him her medal and phone. "Can you put this somewhere safe and reply to my texts for me? Everyone's sent me well done messages and I just haven't had a chance to reply." Jake nodded as she disappeared into the change rooms.

He took out Nessie's training bag from under his feet and wrapped her medal in a towel folded in there. He stuffed it down the side pocket, covering it with the new clothes she just been gifted. _That's as safe as it's gunna get._ He took out his own shirt and zipped the bag back up and threw it back down between his legs.

Jake wasn't going to bother changing his clothes, he already had a pair of jeans on and he'd brought that nice dark blue checked button down shirt to throw over the top of his tee-shirt. It was actually one of his dads' old tops from the seventies, it was kind of western retro and it was Ness's favourite. She seemed to like the way it pulled around his arms and shoulders and the press stud buttons that could be snapped open in a flash. He was grinning like an idiot as he threw the shirt over his shoulders, clicking each button up in succession. Jacob wore it with the specific purpose of her enjoyment in taking it off him later on tonight.

So, after dressing to impress, which took a total of ninety seconds, he spent the better half of ten minutes typing messages of thank-yous, cheekily adding in 'I couldn't have done it without Jake'. He sniggered to himself as he pressed send. She was going to kill him when she saw that.

"What are you laughing at?" she asked cautiously as she appeared in the doorway. Jake looked up a little startled. "Noth…..ing," he stammered, his train of thought gone as he took in her appearance.

She had on a simple little black number, it was sleeveless and came to a low V, showing a bit more cleavage than she normally showed. He marvelled at the way her exposed clavicle rolled over her creamy chest. She had her hair out and her curls were thrown over one shoulder falling across her toned arms. The dress was pretty tight too, seductively hugging her curves, winding over her hips and thighs, to where it ended modestly just above her knees. But what completely blanked his mind was how her long sculpted legs looked in those stilettoes she was standing in. "Fuck Ness, you look incredible," Jake growled, standing up to take hold of her.

She smirked a little, shrugging. "This old thing."

Jake levelled her gaze. "I'm pretty sure I've never seen this outfit before. I would have remembered taking it off," he rumbled, his attraction palpable.

"I may have done a little online shopping." She admitted, moving closer for a kiss.

"I like it when you go shopping," he leered intensely, his eyes undressing her from a distance. "But, now I'm going to have my work cut out for me tonight. I'll be fighting off all the other guys left, right and centre."

She was looking at him through her thick lashes, shaking her head. "They might get to see me in this dress Jacob, but only you get to see what else I bought that goes under it." She gave him a wicked smile as picked up her bag, turned and hauled it over her shoulder as she walked over to where their car was parked.

He watched as her hips swayed and her curls bounced along her back as she slinked away, her heels clicking as she walked. His pants were suddenly feeling very tight. Those six inch stilettoes were the epitome of sexy shoes. That dress was the definition of a sexy little black dress and God only knows what was underneath. She was the embodiment of a sexy woman. And furthermore, ravishingly beautiful in that ensemble. It was going to be a very long night.

* * *

The night actually went faster than expected for Jake. Darcy and Kate had led them all to a thriving 'all ages' sports bar and Friday nights… were karaoke night. They enjoyed a good feed of buffalo wings and potato skins, no one caring about the nutritional content of their food that evening. A true Texan, Darcy was a country boy through and through and it turned out, he loved a good sing along. His song choices kept the fellas entertained for most of the night.

Having not advanced further than the heat on the first day of competition, Solomon had been moping a little, but tonight he was a happy man, out and about and enjoying playing wingman for Chris. "Darcy! Enough with the 'someone killed my dog' songs. I thought you were meant to be celebrating," moaned Solomon.

Darcy clamped on to his shoulder, looking him square in the eye, "Sol, there is only two types of music in this here world that I like, country and or western. And that's just how it is. Now. I want to see each of y'all sing a song tonight, no getting out of it."

Over the course of the evening Kate managed to get Darcy and Ness to sing 'We are the champions' by Queen. Ness thanked God it was a short song. She had to admit though, it did get a lot of the crowd singing along. Chris managed to get out of a turn by slipping off into a dark corner with a blond Ukrainian pole-vaulter on exchange with Princeton.

Kate roped Renesmee and Bella in to singing, 'Love shack' by the B52's. The three girls made the most of the lyrics and rhythm, standing tightly together, all in their tight skirts, pressing and grinding sexily against each other. All of them giving their respective boyfriends a very public, 'private' show. Ness kept her eye on Jacob the entire time she was up on stage twerking her old roommate. Then she wrapped her arms around Kate, swinging her hips as she sashayed down, her legs between Kate's until she had bent almost to the ground. It was almost more that Jacob could take. She was teasing him and she knew, all too well, how close he was to picking her up off the stage and throwing her over his shoulder- caveman style. Renesmee was having fun with the song and at the iconic 'tin roof rusted' bit Ness gave 'When Harry met Sally' a run for its money, her hands a mess in her hair, her face mimicking a climax.

It was just after ten when she sauntered off the stage and Jake was beyond eager to get Ness out of the bar and then out of her clothes. But Darcy and Sol had different ideas. "You're not going anywhere yet Jakey Boy. Put it back away," sang Solomon. "If I have to get up there," he said pointing to the stage, "Then you do too!" Then his eyes levelled at Edwards, pointing at his chest, "You too Eddie. Up you get!" Ness wished she'd had a camera to capture Jacob's face when he was told to basically, 'keep it in his pants', it was fucking hilarious.

"Ow, I have the best song," yelled Darcy. He whispered into Jake and Edwards ears and they both laughed, shaking their heads NO. "C'mon you fellas, I'll make country men out of you before the night if over!" he called as he pushed them on to the stage. Jake gave Ness a 'help me!' look and she just shook her head pointing him towards the stage, the whole time cackling like a hyena. Ness was smiling so much her cheeks were starting to hurt. She felt like her life was pretty much perfect.

Jacob looked so uncomfortable up on the small stage. But he was up there, and she was proud of him for doing it. A few beats later, Darcy's chosen song came on and a microphone was forced in to Jake's hand which he thrust back in to Darcy's. The song was "Friends in Low places" by Garth Brooks, it started slow and built up to the chorus. Edward, being no stranger to the stage, was happy to sing in his tonal baritone voice while Jake hid behind. By the second verse though, Darcy stuck the mic into Jake's face as his deep voice hit all the low notes. Jake was actually a pretty good singer, his tone was true and clean, his deep basset voice was such a turn on, he oozed testosterone on that stage. Ness could hardly wait for the song to be over so he could pick her up and carry her out of the bar. She wanted him in all of _her_ low places.

After the track ended, the three boys stumbled off the stand in fits of laughter. His arms wound around Ness as he bent over to kiss her. "Did I serenade you Babe?" he laughed.

"You might not win the CMA's sweetie but you sure as shit won me. Can we get out of here now?" she said, pressing against him in a not so subtle manner, her leg hitching over his, the top of her thigh showing as the dress rode up. Her breath was hot as her lips grazed along his jaw into his ear. Jake didn't need any encouragement from the little vixen. He had been visually undressing her all night in that dress and he'd reached his limit. "Night guys," called Jake practically dragging Renesmee out of the bar. Ness arched her back and looked over her shoulder as they walked, "So long Dars. Adios Kate. Ciao Edward. Love you Bella!" she sang happily as she got quasi-carried out to the exit, giggling like a girl in love the whole way.

Once outside, the couple were forced to stop short. The storm had most definitely rolled in and it was now bucketing down, the thunder loud as the lightning lit up the night sky. "You want to run for it?" asked Jake, nodding towards the road the car was parked along. Ness pulled an apologetic face, lifting up her crazy high stiletto clad foot, "I don't think I should be running in these."

"Ok. You wait here and I'll bring the car around," he kissed her quickly on the mouth and was off sprinting into the deluge and around the corner. She watched with hungry eyes as she enjoyed the way the muscles of his shoulders and back moved underneath the checked cotton. She loved that shirt on him.

As Ness waited on the quiet street the rain slowed to a soft drizzle. She watched as cars speed by, dodging the splashes from the wheels in the gutters as she looked out for the white hire car, eager to get back to their hotel room. The rental car pulled up across the street and Ness trotted across just as the rain returned heavily again. She was drawing near the car when an elderly lady approached under an umbrella and got in the passenger side of the vehicle and it drove off. _Shit, wrong car._ Ness ran carefully in her heels to hide out from the rain under an awning of a closed shop when a figure came to stand beside her.

"Hello Renesmee," he said in stony voice.

Any boudoir anticipation drained from her as her body switched into alert mode, she felt the hairs on her neck stand up and her mouth went dry. She smiled cautiously.

"What are you doing here?" she asked attempting to keep the fear out of her voice.

"I came to watch you run," he said flatly. His eyes raking over her like she was his for the taking. "Congratulations are in order I believe."

"Um, thanks," she said, her hands winding protectively around herself as she looked up and down the street, anxious to see Jake's car.

"He'll be a while. I think he might have a flat tyre… or four." He moved to stand closer to her, his body heat sending a shiver over her wet skin.

Ness put her hands up between them, stepping back. Her heart was racing. This was it. It was him. All those months of not knowing who was infatuated with her, who was terrorising her and Jacob. Now she knew.

"I like it when you wear a dress," he commented gently, then his eyes turned rabid. "Women should wear dresses. They shouldn't run around in nothing more than nylon underwear." He scowled, distain rolling off him.

Ness was scanning the area, trying to find a way to escape. The water was coming down in sheets and she could hardly make out the bar across the road. "I told you Renesmee, my heart beats for you, and yours for mine. Why did you give my gift away?" He lent into her and placed his hand lightly on her chest.

She stepped back again, pushing him away. He grabbed her by the wrists pulling him into her. He was strong. Stronger than her as she was thrown off balance in the stilettoes and totally unprepared for the sudden a physical attack.

"You look like a slut tonight, whoring yourself out to the stupid Indian."

"Get off me!" she yelled, pushing her arms against him. He gripped her wrists tighter and pushed her against the wall of the shop behind her. She gasped as her back hit with force against the brick, the wind knocked out of her, a sharp pain on her shoulder as her scapular hit against a corner.

Suddenly she was spun around, her face hitting into the brick and there was a sharp sting across her throat. It was cutting into her neck, the more she struggled the harder he pulled, and it was making it hard to breathe.

"You're too strong for a girl Renesmee. But not strong enough," he growled giving the rope a little shake against her neck. "Always training, always running. You need more balance in your life. No more running." He snarled into her ear as she struggled against his hands, his body now pressing against her back. His erection pressing into her backside. "I love you. No one else can love you like I do Renesmee," he purred.

His emotions were yo-yoing between hatred, lust, repulsion and love. He was delusional. Insane. And the more unhinged, the more dangerous the psycho.

"You are mine," he crooned softly into her ear, "and you let yourself be dirtied." He spat as he let go of her hands and gripped a fist full of hair and tugged.

She let out a choked cry as he pulled her head back and practically dragged her along by her scalp. She stumbled in her heels as he tugged her into the rain and around the corner into a service alley. Ness knew she shouldn't let him take her to anywhere that was concealed. She kicked off her stupid shoes and tried to dig her heels in. He responded by a hard fist to her face. The pain seared through her eye and cheek, her head swam and she struggled to stay standing.

"Don't fight me woman. You are mine. And finally I'm taking what is mine." He said as he turned her, his front pressed into her back, guiding her like a dog on a short leash. He twisted his hand and the rope dug deeper into her flesh and she could feel the warm trickle of her blood where the twine broke the skin.

With her freed hands, she flung her arms back over her head, savagely scratching and clawing at his face. She wanted to rip his face off. He cried out as her nails found purchase across his jaw. Her scratches seamed to incense him further. He lifted her up by her hair and threw her down. She caught herself on her hands and knees, her palms burning from the rough pavement.

"I love you Renesmee. You have the most perfect body," he hummed, sliding his hand up her outer thigh under her dress to her hip as he continued to pull tighter around her neck. Her skin crawled from his touch but is was nothing compared to the pressure building inside her head. She could feel her face get hotter and hotter, her throat burning, her whole skull feeling like it was about to explode; it was agonising. "We are perfect for each other. You are my soul mate."

She thought about his words, '_soul mate', _thoughts of her real soul mate flashed through her mind, _Jacob_. If she'd had the air she could have spat the words back at him. He knew nothing of what love was. What it truly felt to be so closely connected to someone you couldn't breathe properly without them. Even so, here she was, without _him_, hardly able to breathe metaphorically and physically.

_Fight_. She had to fight. With every last inch of her life she would fight.

With one arm she started clawing at her throat, grabbing at the rope, trying to get her fingers under. The more she struggled the tighter he pulled. Her other arm was elbowing and punching from behind. She put all her energy in to the punches, but in her oxygen deprived state she was weak and her swings were a pitiful display of her normal strength, nothing more than a limp swing. She had hardly any movement of air now, her vision was curtaining in around her, it was getting harder to focus, darkness was enveloping.

In her semi-conscious state she registered him shoving her dress up as he once again slammed her face into the pavement. She felt a searing pain across her lip as her mouth filled with blood. The hand that had been holding her hair released and was now fumbling behind her.

With the last of her conscious drive, Ness attempted to stand up, trying vainly to escape. He stood, lifting his foot and stomped his heavy boot into her leg, making contact with the side of her knee. She sensed the joint snap sidewards and heard the sickening pop as she felt the sharp agonising pain of the sinew tearing.

Still holding the rope at the back of her neck, her head was flung back as he jumped. He landed with both feet onto her already destroyed knee, his booted heel snapping the bones in her leg. She heard the sound of her bone shattering and felt the pain radiating up her leg and down to her ankle.

He jumped again and as he landed, her bones painfully grating together, she used the last of her breath to let out one last blood curding scream before the darkness finally enveloped her.

* * *

oOoOoOo

* * *

Jake ran through the pouring rain the two blocks back to the car. He fumbled with the lock button, cursing himself for not having the key ready before he'd ran out into the downpour. He ran to the driver's door and set himself into the car, slamming the door shut behind him. He was puffing form the run and his hair and clothes were dripping. He sat back and wiped his face with his shirt but it was soaked. He pulled his hair back and squeezed some of the moisture out. He was so wet, he couldn't drive like this. He searched the back seat for a towel. The noise of the rain on the roof quietened, the rain coming to a sudden stop, only a fine drizzle was splashing on the stationary windscreen. Jake remembered Nessie's training bag was in the boot. He jumped out and ran to the back of the car.

He opened the boot and rummaged through her bag. Finding her new Nike towel, he carefully unravelled it and shoved the medal back in the bag, between the clothes. He threw the towel over his head and was instantly enveloped by her smell. Lavender and cherries.

The rain had all but stopped now so he stood, took of his soaked outer shirt and dried off his hair and face before opening the driver's door and went to lay the towel on the seat. Jake leaned over and then, out of the corner of his eye he noticed the flat pooling rubber of the rear tyre. It was dead flat. "Fuck!"

He could change a tyre, no worries. But it was raining, it was night time, it was a hire car and he'd had blue balls for almost six days. He just wanted to get Nessie home with him. He lent down to look at the tyre and saw a long slit on the side. He reached his finger out and found a long, three inch slash. His senses prickled and he looked over to the front tyre. His stomach dropped when he saw the flat rubber even on the asphalt. Jacob went around to the curb and saw the two wheels on the other side in the same condition. Someone had slashed his tyres.

It only took him a second, he stood on the foot path perplexed, but then, like a switch had been flicked, he ran. He sprinted back to the bar searching for Nessie. The rain had started again, it was pelting down in sheets as the thunder rolled through the sky. Panic coursed through him as he approached the covered awning of the bar finding it deserted.

He ran inside looking for their friends. He spotted Chris in the same corner he'd been only five minutes earlier. "Chris," he yelled. "Have you seen Ness?"

Chris jumped at Jake's shouts, confused and a little pissed at being disturbed whilst he had his tongue half way down Natasha's throat or was it Natalie? "Does it look like I've seen her?"

"I went to get the car and she's fucking gone," said Jake, the panic in his voice getting Chris's attention.

"Ok. Have you asked Kate?" he said looking around the darkened bar. Without answering, Jake turned and ran over to the table they'd all been standing at all night. He scanned the room and saw Kate and Darcy standing by the bar, Bells and Edward slow dancing just to their side.

"Did Ness come back in here?" he asked without any pause.

"No. Why?" asked Bella, her hand resting on the soaked material clinging to Jake's arm. His face answered her questions.

All of the friends in that smoky room felt their hearts drop. Jacob looked around the area not finding anyone with her red brown curls. He pressed both his hands to his lips, covering his mouth, his eyes wild with terror. "Oh fucking hell," he uttered in a broken voice and ran back outside. Darcy and Edward followed Jake while Chris and the girls ran to check the rest of the club and the toilets.

Outside, Darcy and Edward ran up the road and Jake started to run back towards the direction of the car. The rain was still falling, not quite as heavy as before, the thunder had rolled off towards the coast. He was standing on the curb trying to decide where to look next when he heard a sound that would haunt him for the rest of his life. That agonising scream.

He knew her voice, he'd never heard it sound so anguished before but he knew it was her. It was close and coming from across the road. Jake sprinted across and saw a small pool of blood under a shop front with some small drops leading further up the road. The rain had washed any trail away but Jake ran a few feet to the dark alley and saw a flash of movement. He saw the long black hair of a man who was kneeling over a second person. A mass of wet, auburn curls sprawled, unmoving on the ground. He ran to the animal who was fumbling with his pants.

White hot rage surged through Jake. He didn't stop his stride as he kicked the man from his position over her. His boot making contact hard with his ribs as he sent him flying off her and across the pavement. Jacob recognised his face, he'd met the asshole briefly months and months ago. Before he and Ness were together. He'd given Jake the creeps back then and he'd instinctively wanted to protect her from him at that time. Now, he didn't want to just protect Nessie from him, he wanted to kill the mother fucker.

Jake bent over the man sprawled on the cement. His fingers bawled up and he slammed his fist into his face. "Fuck you Nahuel. You mother fucking. Asshole. Rapist stalker." Over and over he punched his face, his ribs and gut. It took both Solomon and Chis to pull Jake off him.

He stopped long enough to see Darcy holding Ness, Bella struggling to pull her dress down over her legs. His heart stopped in his chest. It was like a dagger had been thrust through his heart. He collapsed down in the rain next to her, cradling her head in his lap "Nessie!" he cried as their friends all looked on in horror-stricken shock. "Wake up! Nessie." Her face was a bloody swollen mess. Her eye almost swollen shut, her cheek already turning a purple red. Her beautiful lip sliced across, think with congealed blood. A thick abraded line was traversing her throat where the rope had sliced into her skin. Her breathing was raspy and exerted.

He shifted her further up onto him, his hand smoothing over her hair and temple and across her uninjured cheek, she moaned unconsciously as he shifted her body, her left leg was bent at an unnatural angle. "Ssssh baby," he cried, his tears falling freely. "Ssssh. It's ok. I'm here. I've got you. You're safe now. I'm sorry," he sobbed. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there. I love you Ness. Please be alright," he whimpered, praying to anyone who'd listen.

He sat in the rain, cradling her in a wet back alley of a street in Eugene until the paramedics arrived and forced her out of his hands. The police arrived before the ambulance took her to the hospital, still unconscious. Jake was detained for questioning and he started yelling like a crazed man when he was told he couldn't go with Ness to the hospital.

It took a slap across the face from Solomon before he calmed. "Bella and Edward will go with her now. Jake, you beat the living shit out the asshole and the cops have to talk to you. Me and Chris will stay here with you and we'll drive you to the hospital as soon as the cops are done."

Jake fisted his swollen knuckles into his face, letting out a frustrated snarl. "Fuck this!" he roared, crying through clenched teeth, his eyes still glassy, the pain etched across his face. Then, resigning to his confinement, he let out a great sigh and hands dropping limply by his side, his tense shoulders relaxed just an iota.

He nodded and he turned to face the officer as the red and blue lights of the ambulance lit up the water logged streetscape and hurried his broken Nessie away. He was broken too.

* * *

**Right , so if you missed it, the stalker was Nahuel. This is nowhere near the end of the story. The road to recovery is going to be long and hard. But they'll do it together.**

**New chapter next weekend. **

**Namaste- The light with me honours the light with you, (Some positive energy to conteract the violence.)**


	32. Chapter 32 Nutella

She could hear the persistent beep of her pulse. She knew it was her pulse, because it bleeped in time to the thudding hammering that was knocking behind her skull. Man, did her head hurt and her scalp. So did her neck. And her leg. Christ, her whole body hurt. She was lying in a bed. _Must be a hospital_. Her mouth was dry and when she tried to lick her lips, her action was stopped by an obstruction in her mouth. She pressed her teeth down and bit against some kind of block. She reached up to feel what the barrier was to find her hand was restrained. Thoughts of being controlled and assaulted flooded into her mind. She started to panic attempting to scream, only, her voice couldn't form a sound. Air rushed out in a course whoosh. She was trying to pull her arm away and the hand only gripped hers harder. "Nessie? Ness! It me. You're ok. You're safe. You're in the hospital." Said a voice. She stopped her struggling. _Jake. _The hand was his. She forced her eye open and frowned as the harsh florescent lights blinded her. She felt him stand and lean over her and the lights dimmed. His face moved into her line of site and her eyes met with his. His hand left hers and he started to wipe her hair back over her forehead.

She couldn't see properly, her vision was blurred by her swollen eye. Even through her blurred vision she could see the lines of worry on his face. His hair was a mess and his beard was days old. _How long have I been out?_

She looked into his deep dark eyes. Those eyes were looking down at her now, full of love and life and agony. Those eyes that had watched her with lust and desire. That had flamed at her in frustration. Those dark brown irises that had smiled at her as they met across a stadium. His incredible eyes that looked into hers with such piercing understanding that they saw straight in to her soul. His eyes were filling with tears now as he scrunched them shut and he lent down to kiss her forehead. A drop squeezing out from his lids and landing on her cheek.

He snuffled as he opened his eyes, she hadn't stopped staring at him the whole time. Remembering her dry lips again, she reached up to feel the tube that was coming out of her mouth. "Don't pull on it. You're intubated. Let me get the doctor." She watched as he stood and stuck his head out the side curtain. Within a few seconds, several men and women came in.

"Good morning Renesmee. I'm Doctor Livet." Said a middle aged man in a crisp dress shirt and a tie. "We'll just do some checks and then we'll get this tube out. It's good to see you awake. I'm sure you have a lot of questions. We'll just get you extubated, then we'll all talk. Blink if you understand me." Ness blinked her eyes a few times, noticing the way her right eye -the one that hurt- didn't really move much.

Her attention moved to Jake as the medical staff brought in a trolley and were organising things. He had moved to the far edge of the cubicle. She could see the scabs forming on his swollen knuckles as he twisted his fingers together. His eyes were fixated on Ness, he looked so sad, so tired, so shattered. Even though she was the one lying in a hospital bed with a tube stuffed down her throat she wanted to comfort him. She wanted to take away his pain and anguish. Judging by the dishevelled mess of his clothes he'd obviously been sitting by her side for however long she'd been unconscious and his blood shot eyes looked like they hadn't been closed in sleep for days. She tried to smile but the tube got caught on her teeth, God it was annoying.

In her muted state she tried to convey her love for him with her own eyes, then she lifted her hand off the bed and gave him a little thumbs up. He smiled a heart breaking smile as his lips trembled. He moved back to her bedside, opposite to where the nurse was setting up the trolley. Jake knelt by the bed and lent his chest on the edge, his arms rested on the sheets by her waist. He rested his chin on his fists and looked up at her. Ness ran her nails over his scalp, her fingers combing through his raven hair. She noticed the drips in both her hands. They lay there like that for a few minutes until Dr Livet spoke. "Ok Renesmee, let's sit you up." Jake sat back and the nurse pressed a button on a remote control and Ness was brought into semi-seated position.

"I need to suction you first Renesmee." Said the nurse and she placed a hard plastic like pipe in her mouth. It felt and sounded just like the dentist's suction. _That's not so bad._ "And now I have to suction the tube. It feels a little uncomfortable but it want take long ok?" said the nurse, leaning over to her, making sure Ness understood her. Ness blinked her understanding and she felt Jake's hand grip hers tightly. She looked over to see him biting on his lip, he was more worried all of a sudden. "OK. Here we go." said the nurse as she threaded a small thin tube down the larger tube. Ness was watching Jake's face trying to figure out what was bothering him all of a sudden. Then she felt it. A hot burning in the centre of her chest. It was like when she'd swallowed some water down the wrong way, only ten times worse. She wanted to cough but couldn't. She wanted to cry out but no noise would come. A single tear rolled down her cheek. Jake reached up and wiped it for her. "It's alright baby. It's coming out soon." He tried to comfort, but the despair in his voice betrayed him.

Another nurse undid some ties around her neck and sucked some air out somewhere, then the tube hung free. Renesmee could feel it shift uncomfortably in her throat. She wanted it out.

"Now, I'm going to suction the tube again and this time I'll pull the tube out. Alright. When I say, I want you to cough. Ok?" Nessie blinked. She felt the burn in her chest and then the gaging feeling as the tube moved up her throat. She retched and coughed as the tube was removed.

Her mouth was suctioned with the dentist like suction again and then she had an oxygen mask over her face. Her throat was so sore. It felt like the time she'd had mono in high school only the pain went from her throat all the way into her chest. The doctor listened to her breathing and her throat before addressing Jake. "If she does well without the tube we'll look at moving her this afternoon." Tuning to Ness he added. "We'll get you out of ICU and out of bed by the morning. We might even try some food this afternoon if you like, but don't try to talk for a few hours. Ok?" Jacob thanked the Doctor as he exited the cube. Ness motioned to the nurse indicating her thirst. She nodded and went away, returning with a cup of water with a bendy straw. She lifted the mask off Ness' face and held the straw to her lips. Ness look a tentative sip and revelled in the feeling of the cool liquid as she held it in her mouth, she swallowed and the rawness in her throat sobered her enjoyment, about one hundred metaphoric razorblades cutting as she swallowed.

She leaned her head back on the pillow, she was so tired; so she closed her eyes... just for a minute... and the next thing she knew she was opening them to the sound of Jake pulling his chair away from the bed, the afternoon shining in from behind her head. The nurse from earlier stood at a large table at the foot of her bed.

"Hey sleepy head." He said smiling down at her. "They want to move you to a regular ward now. I'll come with you ok?" Ness nodded, she swallowed the razor blades again, maybe now instead of one hundred there were only ninety in there now.

Renesmee lay semi-recumbent as the nice water nurse and Jake waked beside her bed as an orderly pushed the trolley along the corridor into a lift and then, into the surgical ward. They were all greeted with some warm smiles from the nurses' station as they wheeled past. Even in her current state Ness noticed as the ladies all drooled over Jake. _Hands of bitches. _They ended up in a far corner of the ward, in a single bedroom with a private toilet and shower adjoining. She had a window to the right of the bed and it looked over a view of the parking lot. The nice water nurse from ICU said her goodbyes and the ward nurse said hello before the two medical staff walked outside the room to give a handover. Not before both of them gave Jake the once over first. _Really? I'm right here!_

Jake dragged a large comfy looking chair over to the bed and sat down. "Hi." He said his finger caressing over her jaw line tenderly. "You gave us all such a big fright." He looked lovingly into her eyes. "You might want to know, it's Sunday afternoon. You were in an induced coma for around thirty hours. And then you just slept for another two now." He was quiet, taking his time, breathing slowly. "You had surgery yesterday on your leg, they want to put a pin and plate in but you're not strong enough for that long of a surgery yet. It looks terrible but they call it external fixation, it's like a frame keeping the broken bone in place." He shifted the sheet back and Renesmee saw her swollen knee and her leg covered in a series of metal rods and clamps, like scaffolding supporting a construction site only her knee had been crumbled to pieces not constructed. She recoiled when she saw the rods sinking into her skin where they attached to her bone. Jake covered it up again and turned back to face her.

He gently brushed his fingers over her swollen cheek. "This eye socket has a small fracture but they say the eye was shouldn't be permanently damaged. Your throat is really bruised, the doctors were worried your trachea or the nerves might have been damaged. Is there any tingling in your shoulder or arms?" He asked concerned. Renesmee silently moved her head and shoulders, slightly testing for any altered sensations, it all hurt but not the type of nerve pain he was asking about. She looked at Jake and shook her head. "Good." He said simply, his fingers traced the pout of her lip, rough were his skin caught on what she imagined were cuts. "You got a pretty big split lip too." Jake slumped in his chair, his face contorting into a grimace as he seemed to break, and began to cry silently. All his worries and fears finally overflowing in his exhausted state. His elbow lent on the bed and his hand spread across his face, his eyes buried in his palm.

After a few moments, he wiped his hand along his face, sucking a deep breath through his fingers where they pressed into his lips, attempting to gather himself. "It's so good to see you awake. Do you remember anything?" he asked "You know it was that guy form the orchestra, Nahuel?" Ness nodded her head, not game to speak yet. "Oh god Ness, he was so close. He had your dress up, and he was so close." He cried, his unfounded guilt eating him up. He lifted his swollen hand for her to see. "I think I broke my hand I hit him so many times. I found out I broke his jaw at least." The couple sat, just seeing each other as Jake sniffed and began composed himself. "Rose and Em are here, they drove down yesterday, and they're coming up with Bella in an hour or so." He said checking his watch. "None of the other guys have gone back to Seattle yet either, I'll call them later. They'll probably all want to come see you with your eyes open." Ness nodded her head.

She looked at him as he sat talking to her. He seemed to have taken control of all her medical results. He was using all the big words like he'd been the one the doctors were talking to. She guessed he'd had to have made some decisions on her behalf. He was so good to her and she loved him so much. She could see by the worry lines on his forehead how broken he must have been while she was lying unconscious and oblivious. _He's taken the burden of this all on his own._ They were a team and it was time for him to share the load with her. She knew how much he worried, especially about her and she could tell he mustn't have left her side the whole time. She wanted the first words she said to him to be a declaration of her love.

Renesmee lifted the oxygen mask off her face. She licked her cracked lips, swallowing painfully a few times. She took a deep breath and attempted to speak. "I love you." she croaked. Her voice rough and horse. Jake leant up over her, he gave a little relieved huff. "I love you too." He smiled, the worry lines on his face softening just a little. He held her bruised hand and brought it to his lips, kissing it softly and rubbing the soft skin next to the cannula with his thumb.

She was tired, just bone tired. Jake looked like he was dead on his feet too. "When was the last time you slept?" she asked straining the words out her larynx. He shrugged dismissively, "I slept on and off last night."

"Here?" she asked, her voice forced but soft. He nodded.

Ness tugged on his arm, pulling him up closer. "Lie with me." She shifted over and kept pulling until Jake moved onto the bed. He kicked off his shoes and brought Ness in to his arms. She closed her eyes, her body melting into his.

"I missed you." He muttered into her hair as he pulled the mask back onto her face.

"I'm back now." She assured. "Now close your eyes. You look exhausted." She ordered in a muffled whisper. The couple closed their eyes and slept while the oxygen mask hummed like static and the continuous beep of the heart monitor calmed like the soothing beat of a lullaby.

* * *

Jacob woke to the shuffling's of Ness's foster parents along with Bella and Edward as they entered the hospital room. He was still lying on the bed next to Ness from where she'd pulled him up an hour ago. That was the best sleep he'd had in days even if it was only an hour. He unwound himself from her sleeping form and rolled into a standing position stepping outside the room to talk. Jake filled them all in on how things were progressing. Reassuring them on her condition. Between Rose and Bella, Jake had had company by Renesmee's bedside as he had kept vigil during the day. As they re-entered the room, Jake was greeted by her beautiful smile as she lay looking over from her pillow.

"I thought you'd gone." She said, her voice still sounding rough and sore.

He lent over the bed, brushing his hand over her cheek. "Never." He assured.

"Welcome back to the world of the living sweetie." Cried Rose as she rushed around to the other side of the bed and lent down to kiss her forehead. "How are you feeling?" she asked.

Renesmee smiled through her cracked lips shrugging. "Thirsty." She said simply. At that request Emmitt was out the door and off in search for water. When he returned, he helped her to sit the bed up a little and Ness greedily swallowed the cool liquid, grimacing as she gulped. She emptied the glass and lay back with a sigh. Looking at everyone crowded around her hospital room she asked. "So is this what you've been doing? You just sitting here and watching me?"

Bella just nodded. "At least here we can all sit together. Dam ICU only had two visitors maximum and do you think we could get this one to leave for more than two minutes at a time?" She joked, nudging her friend. Her words were joking but Ness could see that Bella was worried about how much time Jake had spent at the hospital, or much to the point, how little sleep he'd had.

Just then her nurse came in to take her vitals and asking of she was hungry enough to try eating. At the thought of food her felt a sharp knot of hunger grip her. Yep, she was hungry. But no solid food tonight. Not with the way her throat still hurt- it was about fifty razor blades now. The nurse brought in some jello and ice cream and Ness relished the way the frozen treat slid down her burning throat. The makeshift family sat around the hospital room chatting for the better part of two hours filling Renesmee in on what she'd missed while she was out. Like Jake said, he'd punched Nahuel so hard he'd broken his jaw. He had been taken to another hospital for treatment and had already been charged with assault with a deadly weapon, attempted sexual assault and the Washington State Patrol were going to begin proceedings for his extradition and rendition to Washington, so they could charge him with arson and, break and enter and wilful destruction of property. When it was all piled together like that, it was a pretty long list.

Apparently the Oregon Police had been in to speak to Jake and Nessie's Doctors. They'd photographed her injuries as she lay comatose and taken scraping from under her finger nails. It was unsettling to think she'd been photographed and handled without any knowledge. Jacob assured her he'd been there watching as they did everything. He also said he'd been lucky to only get a slap on the wrist for his assault of Nahuel. The stalked hadn't yet pressed charged and they all hoped he never would.

Ness found it hard to think about what had happened. Her memory of events was crystal clear but it distressed her too much to remember, she didn't want to if it wasn't necessary. It would only be a matter of time though before detectives would be up to get Renesmee's statement of events. She wasn't looking forward to that. So, for now, she did her best to push the memory down and change the subject.

After a little while Jake went outside to call Kate and let her know about the room change. As soon as he was gone Ness turned sharply to Bella. "Can you make sure he actually gets some sleep tonight? He looks a fucking mess." She said her voice raspy and pained. Bella nodded, agreeing.

"We tried to get him to leave Ness. Trust me, we all tried, but he was so caught up in his guilt and this crazy idea that you were going to die, even when the doctors told us you were stable." She said, obviously exasperated by Jake's stubbornness. Renesmee gave a look of confusion.

"Why is he feeling guilty?" she croaked.

"Because he wasn't with you. It's not like he could be by your side every second of the day. The creep would have found a way to get to you, one way or another. But Jake can't see that. Maybe you can talk some sense in to him." She suggested.

"Oh, he's going back to the hotel tonight for a proper night's sleep." Threatened Ness as Jake came back in. "If I have to drag him there myself." She eyeballed him through her shiner. He laughed for the first time in two days.

"Drag who, where?" he asked, humoured by the fiery look she was giving him.

There had been times when he despaired that she'd never open her eyes again, so any type of_ looking_ at him made him happy.

Edward chimed in then. "Your very intelligent girlfriend was just making us promise to get you to sleep in an actual bed tonight."

"And have a shower dude." Added Emmitt. "You're kind of starting to smell." He teased.

Jake put his hands up in defeat. "No need to drag me anywhere. Kate packed up our stuff and cheeked out of the hotel for me just now. They're going to bring our luggage and come and see you soon," he said, smiling at Ness. "They're on an evening flight and I think the guys are driving back tonight too, so, they want to say goodbye." He looked lovingly down at Ness as he sat down on the edge of her bed. "There's a hotel a little up the road that I'm going to stay at tonight." Looking up to the others. "Where I promise to bathe and sleep. In that order."

"And eat." Added Bella

"Yes. I'll eat something that isn't from a vending machine" he droned as if he'd been nagged about that topic quite a bit already.

Red Robin smiled to herself at the comfortable banter between her loved ones. Right here in front of her was her family. They were looking after Jake for her. She knew she was loved. And she loved them too.

Pretty soon her athletics friends crowded into the room and her quasi-family bid her farewell, promising to return the next day. Chris entered with a foil balloon with 'get well soon' sprawled across it, and Solomon had a fluffy white teddy bear tucked under his dark arms. Ness laughed quietly at the cliché of it all. But subdued when she saw her friend's reaction to seeing her. Renesmee hadn't seen her face in a mirror yet but it didn't take a genius to guess what she might look like. Darcy paused in the doorway as Kate rushed over to her. "Oh Ness. Oh God. Sweetie it's so good to see you awake. How are you feeling, is your knee hurting?" she asked.

Her knee. It hurt a bit, but so did everything else, she hadn't given it much thought. Then she realised why they were all looking at her with such pity. She had injuries that would take months to heal. Training would have to take a very far back seat. She wasn't going to Sydney.

As the realisation hit her, she waited for the disappointment of her season ending so unfairly to hit, but nothing came. Nothing. She just felt nothing. "It hurts a bit." She said." But everything hurts so much that I don't notice one thing more than another."

"OH shit, your voice!" exclaimed Chris, earning him a slap on the shoulder by Sol.

"She was fucking almost garrotted you dick. Shut the fuck up."

"It's ok." She whispered. "It sounds terrible. I know." They all bantered back and forwards while Renesme sat and listened.

They let her know how some of the other events went on the Saturday while she was out to it. U Dub didn't do so well as a team, in spite of some of their stellar individual performances. The Women's 100m relay got fourth, that was pretty good, for Washington. Jane Alexis from Brown had placed third in the 100m hurdles and was apparently quite vocal on how she was more than willing to take Nessie's spot on the National team. The whole Washington team had been shaken by her attack, in fact, news of the violence has spread around the other University teams like a wild fire. Apparently she was the main subject of gossip for the entire carnival.

It was weird to be the topic of so many peoples discussions yet, be so far removed from all of them. She closed her eyes as she listened to their chitchat, a wave of fatigue suddenly hitting her. She kind of just wished everyone would just leave her alone to sleep now. She'd had a lot of visitors that afternoon and just staying awake for that long was starting to take its toll. Jake saw her head bob and endeavoured to usher the group out. After some protracted good buys Ness and Jake were alone in the little hospital room again.

In the quiet of the afternoon, Jake crawled up into the bed with her. She attempted to shift on to her side but she rolled awkwardly on the leg frame and an extreme sharp pain in her knee spread through her shin right into her toes. _Fuck! _A whimper escaping her lips. Jake noticed her grimace and sat up abruptly. "Are you ok? Are you in pain?"

Renesmee shot Jake a scornful look. "Of course it hurts" she said coarsely. The pain had been there since she woke up it was only in which varying degrees. He understood her look, and shot one back at her clarifying. "I meant, is it bad?" he said, a little irritation in his voice. "I was only trying to help Ness." He said heatedly, the hurt evident in his tone. "I'll just go and get the nurse. You're probably due for some more pain meds or something." He charged off the bed and out of the room before Ness could muster an apology or reply.

She didn't mean to get snarky with him. It's just, well.., it hurt. Every god dam thing hurt. All the time. It had a way of wearing you down. She was tired and it hurt and… she wasn't going to Sydney. And finally, that hurt.

She felt the tears simmer up as a quiet sob bubbled out. She reached her hand up to wipe her eye and was shocked to feel the swelling around it. _Ouch. S_he couldn't even fucking-well cry without it physically hurting. She shifted in the bed, her leg paining a little again. She thought about her knee and decided she wanted to speak to the doctor about her prognosis and recovery time. She had no choice but to be ok with missing out on the opportunity to be in team USA, but Ness was sure as shit she wasn't letting it be a career ending injury. She'd be able to get intensive physical therapy and be back into training for the start of the indoor winter season. Her mind was suddenly a flood with all the new goals she could set for herself. \

It was all just a big distraction from what was really upsetting her.

In the back of her mind she had a pleasant thought that she'd be able to come and go at around school at her leisure, without fear as she moved by herself around campus. But she pushed that thought down, it was an illusion for the Pandora's Box she wasn't ready to open yet. She still hadn't allowed herself to feel anything about the actual reason or person responsible for putting her in the hospital yet. _Nahuel._ She couldn't even think about him. Not yet. She was forcing herself to be in denial for a little longer still. That would come eventually, Red Robin new that. She wasn't hiding or running from it, she just had it locked in a suitcase in the corner of her mind. She wasn't anywhere near ready to open that massive piece of baggage just yet. So for now, she would just focus on her hurdling.

Soon Jake came back in, a tired scowl on his face. He looked over at Ness and it softened as he saw the wet tears still on her cheeks. "I'm sorry I was a bitch." She said. "It's just that everything hurts, all the time. It's exhausting." She said as the tears brimmed in her eyes again. She looked down to her lap as her tears spilled over and some of her emotional pain spilt out. "It's not fair. It's so not fair." She cried, leaning in to him as he sat onto the bed wrapping his arms around her.

"It's alright sweetheart. We're both so fucking exhausted, we both get a few free shots at each other. Ok?" Ness nodded and placed her hands on his chest, comforted by the strength she felt. She pressed her face into his chest and winced at the pain as it shot over her eye to her temple.

A new nurse entered the room them. Introducing herself she went through the name and date of birth check with Renesmee and handed her a little cup with two blue pills in it and moved the table over her lap and filled her glass with water. After Ness had painfully swallowed them down, she sighed and shut her eyes, leaning her head back on the pillow. "Are you tired?" Jake asked.

She nodded, looking at him with sad eyes. "I'm really sorry." She said again.

"Stop babe. Don't worry about it. I understand. I think your holding things together quite well actually." He said, gently pinching her chin with his forefinger and thumb.

She scoffed and gestured to her wet eyes. "Yeah. Real well." She dabbed at her swollen cheek carefully feeling over the puffy lumps. "Before you go, I want to have a look at this." She said, gesturing to her swollen face. "Have you got your phone with you?" Jake half stood and fished it out of his front pocket handing it to her. Renesmee unlocked it and flicked through to the camera switching it to the front lens so she could use it as a mirror. She held it out in front of her, her hand shaking as she adjusted the angle. It was like she was taking selfie. Only this was not a photo she wanted on his wallpaper.

She made a little gasp as she saw her face. What would normally be the white part of her eye was a deep blood red. And surrounding it was a sickly blue black bruise traversing her cheek and settling into a dark grey colour to the side of her nose. Her fingers softly traced over the swelling and down to her lips where there was a long thick cut was scabbing over. She swallowed her vanity back, and she felt the sharp razor blades again. Maybe fifty in there now. Her hand grasped around her soft skin feeling the line of abrasions across her throat. She lifted her chin and angled the phone. She saw the angry red marks from where the rope had cut in.

"Was it rope?" she asked absently.

Jake was silent, his jaw working. He looked at Renesmee, the heartbreaking sorrow deep in this eyes. He shook his head minutely. "It wasn't rope." He said, breaking eye contact and not volunteering anything more.

"Well what was it?"

"Hair."

"Hair?"

"His hair and horse hair, all plated into a kind of cord. The police said it had your hair in it too." Jake held still, his eyes scrunched as he took a deep breath. "I don't know how he got all your hair. He's fucking sick." He spat. "The cops found a roll of wire in his pocket too. Cello strings." He pressed his fist in to his mouth. "If he'd used the wire Ness. It would have cut straight through. You would have been dead before you could scream." Even the idea of her being subjected to such violence brought fresh tears of panic to the surface, the thought of her blood curdling scream had his face twisting into pain again.

She wanted to help him, she felt useless lying in the bed, still attached to wires, tubes hanging out everywhere. She placed a loving hand on his arm. "Jake? Don't cry. I'm here now. I'm ok. He didn't kill me, did he? I'm here. And I'm fine. And he's going to jail. Ok? I'm ok." Jake nodded and he lent forwards burring his face in her stomach as he let out a pent up sob. His tears soaking through her thin hospital gown. She ran her fingers through his hair, pulling out the tie. "Sssshh. Sssshh." She crooned over and over as she moved her grazed hand over his head, stroking his hair over his strong shoulders.

He'd been carrying everything on those shoulders. Not just for the past few days but for the last six months. It was more than any one should be asked to burden for another, no matter how much he loved her, it was too much to carry. He sobbed a little more and then grew quiet. His breathing even and relaxed. He was exhausted. The manic of fatigue finally overcoming him. When she was sure he was asleep she lifted her hand off his head and back.

Leaving him resting on her tummy, she lifted the phone again, looking at the ligature marks on her neck. _More scars_ _to remind me of what's on the inside_. Then she speculated about her knee, what scars would she end up having there? She shifted the sheet and tried to have a look without waking Jake. She felt him stir and she stilled, looking down, she saw there were six rods about half an inch in diameter each screwed through her skin in to the bones above and below her leg. _Yeah. That's gunna leave a scar. _

Recalling her nursing training, she wondered if someone should have checked the wounds yet. Did it need dressing? She was meant to be the 'medical person' between them, so she resolved to find out more about her own treatment, giving Jake the reprieve he deserved. But apparently not the sleep. She shifted the sheet back over her leg and felt Jake shift his head, lifting off her abs. "Did I just fall asleep?" he asked groggily.

Ness nodded, pressing the lock on the phone. "As much as I want you to stay. I think you better go and have a proper sleep. You look so tired love. I know you want to look after me. But you're no good to me if you're drooling all over my body." She chuckled at the double meaning. "Go." She said cupping his cheek, "Have a shower, and a shave," rubbing her palm along his stubble and then combing his hair back off his face. "Have a full night's sleep and come back fresh in the morning." She insisted.

Jacob rubbed his eyes, yawning and stretching. Ness yawed back in an involuntary response.

"All right." He agreed. "I'll go so you can sleep. You want me to bring you up anything tomorrow?" Ness thought about the question. What was she going to do to pass the time? She defiantly wasn't one to enjoy just lying around. "My iPod, is in my training bag. That would be good. Even if I just use it for the meditation play list. " She looked at her blue hospital gown and her dirty finger nails. "And some fresh pyjamas. The unsexy ones." She specified.

Jake just laughed. "As if I'd bring up the lacy ones."

She shrugged, smiling. "Just making sure. And can you bring up my toiletry bag? My mouth feels like a toilet." She asked, scrunching her hair into her fist. "And my hair is a bird's nest. Do you think I can have a shower tomorrow? I'd love to wash it. That doctor in ICU said I might be out of bed tomorrow?"

Jake nodded "Yeah, I think there was some kind of discussion between the Dr Knight and Dr Livet. Knight wanted you up and moving a little today and Dr Livet made them give you one more day. So expect an early visit from the surgeon and then the physiotherapist. I'm sure I can help you sit on one of those seats in the shower, we've got one at home for my dad."

Ness sunk back on her pillow. Like he had many times before, Jake would shower with her, soap up her body. She thought about how unsexy this time would be though. She still had a urine catheter in, her body was covered in bruises, and she'd probably be sporting some plastic bag over the leg frame. What polar opposites getting naked was going to be from the dirty weekend she'd had planned after their week of abstinence. She was trying not to feel too sorry for herself when she remembered the other thing she'd denied herself over the past few months. Her eyes lit up. "Chocolate. Oh God, bring me some chocolate." She asked in her sore raspy voice. "Please! If a girl ever needed chocolate, it's now."

"Sure," he sniggered at her near orgasmic face. "What type?"

"Any." She made a double take "No! I know what I want..," she said smiling, remembering her teenage obsession "Nutella - and some peanut butter and a spoon."

"Nutella?" he enquired.

"You have had Nutella? Haven't you?"

"I've had Nutella Ness," He answered condescendingly. "I just didn't know you liked it that much. I've never seen you eat it."

"That's because I've been going without it for six bloody months." She sighed a deep satisfied groan. "Oh Jacob. You should try it with peanut butter, you get half as spoon of each and just eat it plain out of the jar like that." Her eyes rolled back into her head. "Oh-yeah. Get me some Nutella."

"Well fuck me Ness you sound like your about to cum."

"Shit, I'm sorry. But it does taste really good."

"Not as good as you taste." He teased seductively.

"Oh stop it." She scolded playfully. "You know were not going to be able to do anything like that for a little while? Your balls must be navy blue by now."

"They're really not." He admitted. "It's truly been the last thing on my mind. Believe it or not, I actually love you," he said poking a finger in to her breast bone. "More than I love your body."

"Wow you really must love me then." She jibed, her voice still rasping in a broken whisper.

His face turned serious now, like a gloomy black cloud had washed over him. He swallowed hard, his throat bobbing as he did. "Yes Renesmee. I love you, more than my own life." his eyes darkened in earnest. "And when you are better, were not racing off for a quick fuck either. You were only a zipper away from being raped Ness. I know you don't want to think about it now..."

"No. I don't." she clipped. She'd been fighting her own inner thoughts about what had happened when she was unconscious in the alley. Her imagination filling in the blanks.

"But you're going to have to talk about it eventually. With me or Bella or a councillor.., someone. But were not having sex until you've dealt with it. Ok? I won't do that to you." She nodded her agreement. "OK." She said quietly wanting to lock that Pandora's Box up again. It was too soon to open it.

"It's just that he's already taken so much from you. And… I think the sex is a really good part of our relationship Ness and I'll be dammed it that mother fucker takes that from you too."

"Ok Jake. I get it. Stop. I don't want to talk about it now. I will. Just when I'm ready and I'm not ready yet." She cried, her voice like gravel as she strained the volume.

"Sorry. Sorry." He assuaged in anguish, worried he'd inadvertently hurt her in his attempt to rebuild whatever was broken inside her. "I'm… I'm just so angry still."

"It's ok." She mumbled looking at her bloodies fingernails_. I really want a shower_.

Jake sighed, remembering how tired he was. "How the hell did the conversation get here?" he asked rubbing his brow.

"Nutella." She said with a small smile.

He burst out into laughter. "Fucking Nutella!" He cackled. They both sat laughing with each other. The best medicine for all their woes.

He linked her hand into his, their fingers intertwined, cream and brown twisted together.

"My bracelet!" she cried realising for the first time its absence from her wrist.

"No, I have it." He said pulling it out of his back pocket. "I had to take it off before your surgery". He took her hand and tied it back where it belonged.

"I missed you so much." He said leaning in to her. "I don't think I've kissed you a proper hello yet."

"No, I don't think you have." She said lazily.

"Can I?" he asked.

She cocked a brow at his formality. "Jacob you can kiss me whenever you want. You don't need permission."

"I want to ask any way." He said as his lips brushed over hers. His breath was warm on her sensitive skin. Ness felt a flutter of butterflies in her stomach. It was as if they were back in La Push for Thanksgiving. Neither quitter sure of what the other wanted and not wanting to step over some imaginary line. Only there was no line now.

This man was the air she breathed. He had swept her up and carried her over that line in his arms. They had shared everything together. And since he'd moved to Seattle they'd literally spent every waking moment as one. Of course he could kiss her.

She stretched her neck up off the pillow as he brought his lips gently down. A warm sense of belonging surged through her. The little electric current that was always there zapped across them, creating a circuit of love and rightness.

Both of their lips were parted slightly and he pressed hers a little more firmly. Her tongue slowly wiped over his teeth and he let out a primal moan into her mouth. Renesmee's breathe gathered speed and her hand reached around the back of his neck, her fingers laced through his hair pulling him down. She felt the sting in her lip but kissed through it. Their lips were working in sync, moulding perfectly around each other's. This was exactly where she wanted to be. Wrapped around his mouth.

He lent further onto the bed, his elbows were either side of her shoulders and his chest pressed into hers. She loved the feeling if his weight on her. His hands cupped gently around the sides of her face as he broke away from her lips and ever so softly, peppered around her jaw. He blew his hot breath into her ear, sending a luscious shiver over her skin. His lips grazed down the side of her neck and again her peppered tiny kisses across her throat, following the angry line to the other side. His tongue left a wet trail as it traced its way upwards. He licked her ear with his tongue, blowing on the wetness it left behind, the cool and heat encompassed her and she exhaled in satisfaction. His lips came back to hers and he kissed her once again. His tongue tracing the inside if her lips and around the edge of her teeth. His lips were hot on hers and she melted into the bed contented as he lifted off.

He hovered over her, his face inches from hers, his beautiful eyes searching into hers. "You can do that any time you like Jacob Black," she said a little breathlessly.

"I'm going to do that every day for the rest of our lives Miss Masen." He replied, giving her one last peck before lifting off and standing.

"I'm gunna go." He said as he fished around behind the bed, laying the buzzer next to her pillow. "Make sure you buzz if you need anything. Promise you'll ask for pain medicine if it hurts." He asked, concern in his eyes.

She nodded smiling, "I will, don't worry."

"Ok. I'll bring up your pj's and bathroom stuff in the morning. And I'll charge your iPod." He said fixing up the blankets around her and smoothing them out. "You want anything else before I go?" he asked filling up her water glass and rolling the table within easy reach. He was stalling and they both new it.

"Just go Jake. I'll still be here in the morning. It's not like I can get up and walk out of here." She laughed.

"All right." He intoned lightly, brushing his hand over her forehead and kissing it. "I love you. See you in the morning ok?"

"Kay, Love you." She smiled a little groggy, as he left the room. He turned in the doorway and blew her a kiss, she caught it with both hands and pretended to stuff it down her hospital gown. He laughed as he turned and headed off.

She closed her eyes and let the sweet opioid induced drowsiness carry her away. It was only seconds before she was sleep.


End file.
